1bloodybones1

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Based

[Edit: pirate it here! It's on me. _*DOWNLOAD*_ ]

[Edit 2: this isn't the new edition, Pristine Cut or whatever]

10000 likes!

Happy Pride!

It's my 6 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

6 years.........wow

Electric Love - Ao3 Preview

Want early chapters? Read on Ao3!

Chapter 3: What's in a Deal?

Link to Chapter 1

He knew he had you. There was no way he didn’t. He’d done his research and saw how low your statistics were. With the power and control he was offering you, your numbers would skyrocket. You’d no longer be a team of one and could bring your visions to life at a much higher speed with far more efficiency than you could dream of on your own.

Your hesitation speaks volumes and he’s just waiting smugly for you to take the bait. However, instead, you just smile softly and shake your head. "You're going to think I'm crazy, but I'll actually pass on that."

There’s a beat of silence as Vox replays your answer in his head to make sure he heard you right. He nearly dropped the mug in his hands as he comprehended that you genuinely just turned him down.

Link to the full chapter

Spectre Masterlist

A Moon Knight Halloween Love Story

Send me your Spectre theories!

Event #1: Are You In the House Alone?

Event #2: It Comes At Night

Event #3: Soul Survivors

Event #4: From Dusk Till Dawn

Event #5: House at the End of the Street

Event #6: A Nightmare on Elm Street

Event #7: Angel Heart

Event #8a: Us

Event #8b: You Won't Be Alone

Event 9: Little Shop of Horrors

Event 10: One Missed Call

Event 11: Halloween Ends

My Fic Masterlist ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ

Overall fic summary: Marc Spector and his alters Steven and Jake have lost the love of their lives. They each try to move on, in their own way, but getting over you is the hardest thing they've ever faced. Marc starts to see you everywhere - he's haunted by your memory. No, literally, why are you sitting on the end of his bed? He believes in ancient deities, seeing how Jake still serves one as Moon Knight. But ghosts?

Pairing: Moon Knight system (Marc, Steven, Jake) x f!reader

Overall fic content: 18+ only. This is a ghost story.* It is also a love story. Reader character has passed away. Hasn't she? Angst, themes of death and dying*, grief, various healthy and unhealthy coping mechanisms, violence, alcohol, mentions of food, swearing, pining, some arguing, crying, some smut (more erotic/suggestive than explicit), some fluff, mystery, suspense. *if you are sensitive to thriller/horror elements, death/dying or anything mentioned above, please do not feel the need to read this.

However, if you love to get in the spooky mood and/or you enjoy love stories, I promise this is for you.

Banner does not indicate reader's race

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ

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The Daughter's Return Table of Contents

Hi friends! Tumblr hates me and won't let me add more links to my post, so I'm adding all of TDR here and will update it on this post instead of my Masterlist!

Meeting 1. The Promised Position  2. The Strategist of the Second Division  3. Some Friendly Advice 4. Secrets Exchanged 5. Parting Ways 6. Truth or Dare 7. Infiltration Plan  8. The Captain and the Barmaid 9. A Family Affair 10. Secrets in the Files 11. Uninterrupted 12. The Morning After Falling .5 Stories from the Vault 1. Stories Around the Breakfast Grill 2. Under the Falling Water 3. Jinx 4. A Steamy Situation 5. The Road to Love 6. Bad Mood

Running 1. Sick with Dread 2. Revelation 3. Changes 4. Doctor's Visit 5. In Paradise 6. Straw Hat Luffy 7. Redirection 8. Promises Broken... 9. And Promises Kept 10. Change in Plans 11. Lava and Ice, Together Again 12. The Call Home 13. Shared Sake, Shared Secrets 14. Returning Home 15. House Arrest 16. Let's Talk Strategy 17. The Old Man in the Bar 18. Ace's Perspective - Prison 19. The Morning of War

- ARCAINICS - Chapter One: Moonshine

Twisting and turning in his bed a boy tries to sleep, if that's what you call it with a nightmare-riddled mind. The boy hasn't truly slept since last year in all honesty, ever since that damned night he's had nothing but nightmares. Not the usual kind with killer clowns and being naked at school, the odd kinds of dreams filled with foreboding and a constant feeling of… well he still can't put his finger on that feeling really. Dreams filled with clocks and his friends, but one thing doesn't change though he's always separated from them in one way or another. Either they're on a different train than him or they can't seem to hear him when he's right next to them. But the voice he hears clear as day behind him is quick to assure him " They can't come with like this, but you'll fix that soon enough won't you?". It's so odd and out of his depth that he really just tries to ignore it for the most part, but that doesn't stop the dreams from coming, and honesty probably never will. But still he sleeps twisting and turning like he's sleeping on nails, till everything stops for a brief moment and he awakes. Abrupt and quick he sits up knocking his head on the empty bunk above him with the grace of a startled cat.

He jerked back in pain, starting his day with a headache. He begins to make the damning realization looking to his alarm clock sitting on the side table next to his bed that it's quiet and says 8:00am instead of its supposed far earlier time of 7:00am. "what the-?" the boy mumbled to himself with confusion as he looked closer at the alarm. Within seconds everything clicked, as sleep left his eyes he looked at an alarm clock that was both very broken. Seeing its internal working strung about on the side table and very much not doing its job to wake him up before class. Here the boy sits in his bed, looking upon the remains of his clock knowing full and well that he's fucked.

~~~~

Looking at his phone he checks the time with hope that it's given him a bit more of itself. " 8:25am", he grimaced to himself as he realized that time had done no such thing so he continued on. Running down the hallway as if he's being chased the boy sprints in hopes that his first-period teacher will be kind to his lateness, but with his luck he just kinda hopes he'll be let off with standing in the hallway for the rest of the period. He's lucky he thinks or more so that the gods are smiling down on him this morning, when he entered the classroom there was no teacher in sight and students were talking amongst themselves. " Mr. Hayashi was called down to the administration office something about a student missing from the dorms this morning." Informed a girl seeing the boy enter the room, he looks to the voice to see a girl more precisely the class president surrounded by a group of girls" The teachers and faculty have been looking for them since the dorm checks this morning at 6:00am" she continued " I'm guessing that was you Tengu-san." Gleamed the girl with a smirk as her friends giggled and snickered around her. As the boy was about the speak up a voice behind him spoke up " It's Tengah madam President i thought you of all people would have known that." The boy turned to the somewhat sarcastic voice to see his friend, a young man of average height with dark brown eyes, tan skin, and three piercings in his left ear and one on the right. He wore his hair in a choppy undercut style, with the top an auburn red and the sides dyed black. Wearing their school uniform though hastily thrown on was his black blazer with his white dress shirt not tucked in and tie simply draped around his neck. With a grin, he continues " If I were ta guess tho I'd bet you'd know a lot about the missing student wouldn't you prez" he smirks smugly at the girl from the doorway. He walks past the boy towards the girl with his hands in his pocket looking around the classroom with a lazy smile on his face "In fact I'm pretty sure I saw her too, getting off the back of some guy's motorcycle at the front gate.". The girl's face turned red with anger and shame, as the girls around her gasped and whispered to each other about who it could be and looked towards her.

As she stands from her desk about to tear into the red-haired boy the abrupt grumbles of a teacher quiet the classroom " Mr.Torres, Mr.Tengah thank you for joining us this morning why don't you find your seats so class can begin." Mr.Hayashi drawls on entering the room from behind the boy still standing in the doorway. " Yes, sir." the boys say in unison while walking to the back of the class, the class president glaring at the red-haired boy as he walks by her desk with a grin. Walking to their seats as the teacher begins to speak the red-haired boy nudges the boy and whispered " You look like shit man what happened? ". Sitting down at his desk the boy began to look at himself and he wasn't wrong he'd seen better days. His uniform was a mess with a wrinkled white dress shirt and half-on blazer, in his rush to leave the dorms he'd forgotten his tie and also to brush his hair. He looked to the window on his left to see a reflection of black messy bed-head going everywhere, and bags under sea-green eyes so much for sleep he guessed. At least he remembered his backpack and phone. " My alarm clock was broken." The boy whispered to the red-haired boy, " Do you have something to share with the class Mr.Tengah?" Plainly stated the teacher as the class looked to the boy. " No, sir no." Stated the boy clearly frazzled as he waved his hands as if trying to wave away the attention. The teacher looks at him for another moment before continuing on with his lecture to the class. The boy sighs leaning back in his chair, when he feels a buzzing come from his pants pocket. He looks at the teacher for a moment to see if he's being watched and quickly pulls out the phone from his pocket. The phone sits in his hand for a moment he's still not used to using the thing even after a few months with it, it's not a hard thing to use but it's more so the fact that he has it to begin with. It wasn't a flip phone which he found odd in the beginning, it had all the capabilities of one but with more somehow. It's sleek black and has no buttons just a big screen with the exception of a button on the side to turn it on, other than that he just has to use his fingers to work it. Which actually works when he found it he hadn't had the slightest clue what it was, but now he uses it every day especially since his friends started finding ones similar to his all over the place.

BUZZZ BUZZZZ

"Oh right someone's trying to talk to me." Even though he's had it for months he's still not used to it just yet, the boy turned the phone on to see who could be reaching out to him. Within an instant, his eyes narrowed and a grimace took over his face, " Of course, it be you, of all people." He grumbled to himself.

Boy answer chat.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////// ------ 10/31/03 [9:45pm]------ - -angelicAstronomy Started Chat- - - AA: Now that I think about I never asked how you got this phone anyway did I? TC: yay its you again AA: Don't get too excited crybaby ♡. TC: Why do you insist on calling me that!? AA: Because. TC: …. Well? TC: Why!? AA: Hmm. TC: ….. Really? TC: And you call me childish? AA: Oh, calm down crybaby I didn't take your candy this time so shut up. AA: And you know is very impolite to not answer a question when asked. TC: You didn't answer mine! TC: Why should I answer yours! AA: Because unlike you I was polite and asked first. AA: Now answer my question pissbaby. TC: First off you didn't even say hi! TC: Like you ever do AA: And never will. TC: Secondly im not answering your question TC: And thirdly I'm in school and i don't feel like losing my phone for a whole day because of you! AA: Oh please! AA: You would've been loss the damn things months ago with how avidly you text me. AA: I swear you don't waste time. TC: What!! TC: No! AA: Oh Yes. AA: Every time I text you, you waste no time immediately responding back to me. AA: Every time I can't help but think that you're just waiting looking at your phone like a puppy waiting on a text from me! AA: It's quite hilarious if you ask me. AA: Also, school. AA: Gross. TC: Hey! It's not funny and I'm not waiting on you! TC: You just text at….really convenient times.. AA: Every time? AA: Really? TC: Yeah AA: ….. That's a sad excuse even for you crybaby. TC: Stop calling me that! AA: I'll stop once you answer my question~. TC: Like hell AA: Aww, come on I'm serious you know I wanna know. TC: You AA: Yes. TC: You'll stop calling me "Crybaby" AA: Yes. TC: If I answer your question AA: I'll call you something worse if you don't. TC: Ok, Ok fine TC: But in all seriousness i can't AA: Oh why not. TC: I can't tell you! AA: I swear if this is about your bullshit little gang again! TC: HEY IT'S NOT BULLSHIT!! TC: I WAS DEAD SERIOUS THIS IS A LEGIT GANG AA! AA: Oh yes, and I'm a worldclass popstar who tours the world. AA: Haha~. AA: Eat shit TC, you know I don't care. AA: And even if I did, its like I'm gonna join up or some shit. AA: I got better things to do than see your fuck face irl. TC: Hey! AA: Even then, trust and believe if your looking me in the eyes we got bigger issues to deal with than your "gang". TC: Oh joy more of your cryptic bs TC: What does that mean this time? AA: Hmmm. AA: You know what? AA: I'll tell you this time. TC: Wait? TC: Really? AA: Yeah. TC: Your gonna be straight with me? AA: Yep. AA: But if I'm gonna be straight with you, you gotta be straight with me. TC: uggggh TC: Look if I answer you dumb question will you seriously stop being cryptic? AA: Yep. TC: And no more crybaby AA: Answer the fucking question. TC: Ok Ok TC: I found it near an abandoned tunnel outside of town late at night. AA: What the hell were you doing out there. TC: Gang stuff AA: So getting your ass beat at the crack of dawn. TC: WHAT! TC: NO! TC: I WAS BEING CHASED! AA: By who? TC: Ugh that's not important, what's important is that i lost them and ran into the tunnel and on the other side i tripped and almost hit my head on this thing. AA: Yeah you tripped alright. TC: What does that mean? AA: Not important ♡. TC: Hey you said you'd be straight with me if I answered your question. AA: Yep. TC: Question answered, start talking. AA: Oh yeah, you answered. TC: Well? AA: Oh right! AA: I fucking lied. TC: WHAT! AA: Why are you surprised? AA: Not my fault you fell for a obvious fucking lie, you crybaby. TC: OH COME ON!! AA: Don't "Come on" me crybaby, you should've known better. AA: That's purely on you. TC: I TC: AM TC: SO AA: Come on your almost there ♡. TC: FUCKING TC: DONE! AA: You did it! AA: Congratulations Crybaby ♡. TC: Fuck you! AA: Love you too pookie bear muah!♡. -angelicAstronomy Left Chat- - TC: Why do I even answer at this point. TC: what's the fucking point? -temporalChicanery Left Chat- -

The boy left the chat feeling angry and slighted, which is normally how he's left most conversations with "AA" feeling. They started chatting with him a few weeks after he found the phone and they haven't let him have peace since.

Popping up every month or two to chat at him often giving him shit for his life and being very cryptic, also calling him a "Crybaby" whenever he's called them out for being an asshole which is something they're damn good at and damn proud of to. As he frowned at his phone another chat came through, though this one is far more welcome.

Boy answer red haired boy's chat.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////// ------ 10/31/03 [10:11am]------ - - - ardentCyclone Started Chat - - - AC: Yo! AC: Hey ~~ AC: Hey you know your making that face again right? TC: Yeah ik AC: You knw it wouldn't kill u to ignore them right? TC: Yeah ik neeks AC: I'm just saying ~~AC: Wouldn't hurt to try every now and then kd. TC: I hope that means you've been ignoring you know who right AC: What! AC: of course i have AC: compared to you i've been living the dream TC: If by dream you mean they don't even talk TC: Can you even count what they do as talking? AC: Prblby not which mskes it super easy to ignore! AC: definitely not like when they first popped up TC: Still kinda surprised you played along AC: eh it was like charades AC: but forget that whats with the face this time? TC: oh yeah thank for reminding me AC: I culdn't have been that bad TC: Speak for youself! TC: You get charades i get an asshole who refuses to stop texting if i dont answer and gives me shit when i do! TC: Theres no winning! AC: You could stick it out next time? Not rspond til they get the hint and bail. TC: Doubt it they don't seem like the kinda person who gives up. TC: might actually show up one day in person just to give me shit about ignoring them. AC: hmmm AC: guess your shit outta luck then i tried TC: Wow your so helpful AC: Yes AC: Yes i am AC: Anyway do we have a meeting tonight? TC: Why are you asking me TC: Isn't your brother the right hand? AC: Arent you bstfrs with our leader? TC: First off no TC: secondly are you not talking with your brothers again? AC: no TC: Then your asking me because??? AC: Fine im not tlking to them right now AC: they were being assholes last night so i bailed til this morning TC: Is that why all the teachers were losing there shit this morning before class! TC: You do know that they check the dorms before class everyday right? AC: Well now i do, do you knw how hard it was getting back in after 8 this morning AC: i dont think ive seen that many teachers since i started going here TC: They were looking for you since 6am TC: knowing this im kinda surprise your brothers covered for you AC: huh? TC: huh what you know they covered for you right? TC: There's no way the admin would've gone this long without know who was missing AC: ….. AC: fuck me TC: Why do you think they stopped look? AC: idk i thought they gave up since class statred soon!? AC: idk!? AC: Shit! now i owe them damn it! TC: Well that solves one mystery today

As the boy chats with his friend another message pops up on his phone. While the message itself was mundane the sender was far from it.

Boy check message.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////

------ 10/31/03 [10:30am]------ - - - ambitiousConundrum Started Chat - - - AC: hey kd i need you to go somewhere with me real quick : ) TC: Oh hey yeah i can but what about Ken isnt he with you? AC: yeah no i saw him this morning but he looked pissed :/ AC: said something about needen to find niko and left :*( AC: i think he's in the gym now tho :]

The boy looked up and out the windows nervously to the neighboring building, which just so happened to hold the gym not too far from him and his currently hunted friend. The boy quickly took to warning his friend.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// TC: Shit AC: wht your making a face again they cane back for round two? TC: No M needs something TC: Annnd your brother may or may not be looking for you right now AC: excse me TC: Masaru is asking me to go somewhere with him since aparently he hasn't seen Ken since this morning and he didn't seem happy AC: he never looks happy what if he went looking for .. idk something thats nt me TC: He said ken is looking for you AC: fuck TC: As much fun as it would be to help you hide i gotta go AC: What wait no! AC: i helped you with the asshole todya help me out! TC: If thats what you call helping ok TC: He's in the gym you got 10 mins, but since hes mad more like 5 AC: thats not helpful! TC: I tried gotta go dont die! AC: Hey! - - - temporalChicanery Left Chat - - -

The boys quickly gathered their things and stood to leave, before the teacher could speak to ask them what they were doing. Both in unison spoke up with their hands raised " I need to nurse's office, my brothers hurt!" Shouted the red-haired boy now known to be Niko, frantic and scared. " My mom is having an emergency i need to go!" Exclaimed the newly named KD frantically as his friend. Before the teacher could utter a word they were gone, out the door of the classroom and running down the hallway opposite of one another. Niko to hide from his impending punishment from his older brother, for leaving the school on his own. An KD to see what he's needed for today.. oh yeah why did he just lie on his mother. Right the chat! The sender was still chatting with him.

Quickly boy check your chat!

//////////////////////////////////////////////////// AC: ….? ;? AC: Hey KD ya there? ;? TC: Oh sorry! my bad where are you ill meet you there now AC: cafeteria im hungry :) TC: Yeah ok also where are we going? AC: ehh no where special just meeting up with kaz he said somethin about some asshole causin trouble but nothing serious :\ TC: oh AC: yeah just going to see if somethin funs gonna happen if not then we get to kick some asshole ass and head back. >:] TC: ok cool im almost to the cafeteria meet you soon AC: ok also i hope you brought your wallet :) TC: umm why? AC: becauuuuse ive been here since 7 and thought ken would be back by now and they wont let me leave til i pay :*) AC: have i mentioned i have no money and have a tab :**) AC: aparently a very big tab :***) TC: ill be there in 10 AC: huh? You said you were almost here :o TC: yeah but i don't carry that much cash on me i gotta head back to the dorms for more. TC: can you hold out for a little while AC: ehh yeah but be quick the cafeteria ladies are given me the stink eye :/ TC: ok be there soon TC: oh and mas? AC: yeah? :? TC: stop ordering food youll make it worse and im not rich AC: ok :( TC: cool - - - temporalChicanery Left Chat - - -

KD looks at his phone and sighs, of course, M's eating this place out of house and home at 7 a.m. He finally slows to a stop tired from running almost all the way to the cafeteria, and begins his track back to the dorms for some extra cash his mom gave him from the beginning of the week. He's been staying at the school dorms full-time for almost a year now that he's thinking about it. All students had the option to stay at the dorms or stay home, but once you chose an option the school made you stick with it for the rest of the year. He's been doing so since that damned night last year and to be honest, he didn't want to.

If he wanted to be watched he really could've stayed home, that's all his mom did. Watch him every hour of the day she didn't work and text him for every hour she couldn't. He never really knew why she was the way she was but last year gave him this inkling of possibility why. So when the time for school came around, he didn't waste time trying to convince her to let him stay in the dorms. Which even for him was a hard sell, he wouldn't say the school was the best place to want to spend your whole day and night. The school was practically run by the delinquents and gang that go here, the gang of which he's heavily affiliated with. Which at least he believes anyone with sense would in his specific situation; much like him almost everyone in the gang isn't fully Japanese or any really. Either your mom or dad is or you got really lucky and were born here, not so lucky though you were born here and it's very obvious you are not fully Japanese to everyone around you.

Some kids got off easy though, they actually got to make friends and weren't bullied to shit in their early years but not everyone is so lucky. Like him and a majority of the other members of the gang, they got the shit end of the stick. Not just bullies but crappy home lives too, which was why the founders made the gang in the first place. To have somewhere to go with people who care and would back you up. KD was the newest member of the gang only being with them for two years now, and to be honest he wouldn't have it any other way. For once he has friends and more people to care about than just his mom, it's nice to have more. For the most part, he just wished he could have both at the same time.

He makes it to his dorm room with time spare and is immediately reminded of the morning just a few hours ago. Blankets, sheets, and dirty clothes riddle the floor along with parts and pieces of old computer equipment he found in the school storage down in the basement of the dormitory it was a mess. He always had a thing with computers and machines, while he was never the best at actually making anything that worked. He liked seeing the inner workings of them, and seeing how they tick. Speaking of tick as he stumbled through his crowded messy room he came upon the remains of his alarm clock scattered across his bedside table in pieces from the prior night's mechanical festivities. He's partially glad that he didn't get a roommate this year, he was supposed to have one but the kid dropped out a week before school started. At least this way he doesn't have to explain the clock and computer parts to an unexpecting roommate who didn't sign up for a majority of the things he did when by himself.

Quickly finding an extra $20 in the drawer of the table he quickly throws a few shirts in the hamper next to the door and grabs his dark green letterman's jacket to rush back out the door. Locking the the door behind him he looks at the time on his phone. "11:20 am" He sighed to himself and began to run to the cafeteria, "it's barely the afternoon yet so much is going on.".

He's right by all extents so little time has passed yet the world moves as if it's going to end. As the boy runs he can't help but feel that there's something different about that day like something going to happen, like something's gonna change. With intuition like that, you'd think he's psychic because today is the day change will come, with hope maybe just maybe he'll be ready for it but best believe he won't be alone.

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.

UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

(Source)

Page 4 has arrived!! I wonder what Howdy has seen o0o!!

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Reblog to send care packages to our troops on the front lines (ao3 volunteers) in their fight against this eminent threat (DDoS attacker).

'hey, whatchya makin' over there--? oh good god--'

yay! a ✨masterpost.✨

all the projects i'm currently working on are below!

-> 💎 I'm Sorry, Teenage Mutant What Now?

[ rottmnt au in which splinter is able to obtain cloaking brooches when the turtles are still tots, and they live their lives are 'normal' humans, so very much so that they eventually forget their mutant origins... until they remember... ]

Fanfic!

General Tag!

Intro Post!

Headcanon Sheets: Raph, Donnie, Leo, Mikey, Yoshi, Activity Levels

Ref Sheets (WIP): Raph, Donnie, Leo, Mikey, Yoshi

Cloaking Crystal Lore

Comics: Draxum's Visit, Thanks April, Eyeshadow, Stimming, Coming Out, AU Competition, Weird, 2AL, Adderall, GMNT Crossover, Class Pet, Fine Dining, Pretty-er, Pretty-er Pt.2, Chase, Hide n Seek, Mother's Day, Good Advice, Chomp, Pizza, Fight?!

-> 💫 Gemini AU

[ rottmnt sep au focusing on leo and donnie raised by big mama in the grand nexus hotel and performing in the battle nexus. ]

General Tag!

Intro Post!

Gemini Headcanon Sheets!

Mikey Intro! Raph Intro! Splinter/April Intro!

Comics/Illustrations: Fighting Style, Hotel Days, PR, Moniker, Aries, Debut, Witchcraft, Pride, Worst Punishment, Fun Fact,

-> 🦶 Foot Squad AU

[ rottmnt au in which the turtles were raised in the foot clan alongside cassandra jones, and, eventually, april o'neil ]

General Tag!

Intro Post!

Comics: April

-> 🧬 TMNT: Stabilize

[ tmnt fan iteration following the turtles' attempt to uncover the origin of the mutated forms in order to save the life of their father, master splinter ]

General Tag!

Intro Post!

Ref Sheets!

Comic: Pt. 1, Pt. 2, Pt. 3

Side Content: Raph's Trump Card

-> 🐢 Processing Grief Through Ninja Turtles

[ a very loose 'series' of comics exploring grief/loss with rottmnt ]

Twins Pt. 1, Twins Pt. 2, Last Man Standing, Mistake, Weight, Cass Apoc, Nebraska, Gentle Reminders, The Idea of You, Survivor, Inhumanity

Non related information [what programms I use for animation]: I use Toon Boom Harmony Premium (mostly. Like it very much, it has a lot of stuff and it's comfortable for me...) But Krita and Clip Studio Paint (animation mode) are also not bad, but for more painted looks [This comic will end after Raph's death and Leo's acceptance of Casey, so that this comic with main story could fit to almost any version of au , I'll just add some extras of how I expected some future points]

Life of violence era Masterpost

Just rough sketches of major periods in the Turtles' lives, from the Krang invasion to the actual events of the movie.

It can be boring, not fun, not at all exciting, there can be a lot of dialogues, there will be just events, like from the chronicles, it will just be, because I miss the period of Leo becoming a leader, I miss their mutual relations and support in these difficult times when they are still very young and not ready for this, how they got to what they will have later… and I'll try to do it as short as possible... __________________________ Prologue [L.O.V.E] Ep 1 [The day we (Leo) lost the key] : 1 | 2 Ep 2 [The calm before the storm] : 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 Ep 3 [Moving forward] : 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 Ep 4 [Little oasis] : 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 Ep 5 [We lose, we gain] : 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | little epilogue Ep 6 [Lair games] : 1 | 2 | 3 Ep 7 [This is in the past, remember, I'll fix everything] : 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 ---------------------------------- Animatic staff: I'm not okay | Here comes the boy | Middle of the night | some kind of magic Mikey??

Okay, I reeeeally hope this works properly...

Cass apocalyptic series Masterpost

Also known as "Would you believe me if I promised you a good ending" Would even I believe myself? .....

So...one day I thought "hmmm, what if we had another season about the bad timeline" and then I went to draw it

_________________

Ep 1. Master Leonardo becomes Baby Blue once again

Ep 2. Can you carry your uncles?

Ep 3. Raph is dead. The good news is it's fixable

Ep 4. Your brain may be human, but your soul speaks in turtle

Ep 5. Mikey looks sixty, but he's not even forty. Donnie can do something about that

Ep 6. Krangified

Ep 7. How many cool points does your dad have?

Ep 8. You may not be human. You might actually be a turtle

Ep 9. Commander O'Neil

Ep 10. Tiny Tello

Ep 11. The little things

Ep 12. Everything is falling apart

Ep 13. You are in the past, your thoughts are in the future

Ep 14. Donatello

If you use my comic pages in your art (such as voiceovers, edits, etc) please credit me as their author and attach a link to this blog.

Otherwise, I can and will report you for copyright infringement. Thanks:)

The Gift That Keeps Giving....

TWE Semifinals

Round 5, voting now!

Match 1: Marceline (Adventure Time) vs. Harley Quinn (DC) Match 2: Bayonetta (Bayonetta) vs. Vriska (Homestuck)

Tumblr Sexyrematch info

TUMBLR SEXYREMATCH POLL MASTERPOST

I'll update this as the rounds progress.

ROUND ONE:

Lewis Pepper (Mystery Skulls Animated) vs. Professor Venomous (OK KO) WINNER: LEWIS

Guzma (Pokémon) vs. Bill Cipher (Gravity Falls) WINNER: BILL

The Warden (Superjail) vs. Almond Cookie (Cookie Run) WINNER: ALMOND COOKIE

The Once-ler (The Lorax (2012)) vs. Megamind (Megamind) WINNER: MEGAMIND

Sans (Undertale) vs. Junkrat (Overwatch) WINNER: SANS

Tony the Talking Clock (Don't Hug Me I'm Scared) vs. Black Hat (Villainous) WINNER: TONY

King Dice (Cuphead) vs. Raymond (Animal Crossing) WINNER: RAYMOND

Wheatley (Portal 2) vs. Doc Ock (Marvel) WINNER: WHEATLEY

Nagito Komaeda (Danganronpa) vs. Dr. Habit (Smile for Me) WINNER: KOMAEDA

Cecil Gershwin Palmer (Welcome to Night Vale) vs. Slenderman (???) WINNER: CECIL

Jack Skellington (the Nightmare Before Christmas) vs. Turbo (Wreck-It Ralph) WINNER: JACK

Ingo (Pokémon) vs. Bruno Madrigal (Encanto) WINNER: INGO

Purple Guy/William Afton (Five Nights at Freddy's) vs. Spamton (Deltarune) WINNER: SPAMTON

Alastor (Hazbin Hotel) vs. Loki (Marvel) WINNER: LOKI

Arataka Reigen (Mob Psycho 100) vs. Beetlejuice (Beetlejuice (all versions)) WINNER: REIGEN

Herobrine (Minecraft) vs. Benr(e)y (Half Life VR but the AI is Self-Aware) WINNER: HEROBRINE

ROUND TWO:

NOTE: Starting round 2, I'm ditching the bracket and opting for randomized matchups. The left side will stay on the left and the right will stay on the right, but otherwise it'll be shuffled.

Wheatley (Portal 2) vs. Lewis Pepper (Mystery Skulls Animated) WINNER: WHEATLEY

Bill Cipher (Gravity Falls) vs. Raymond (Animal Crossing) WINNER: BILL

Tony the Talking Clock (Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared) vs. Almond Cookie (Cookie Run) WINNER: TONY

Sans (Undertale) vs. Megamind (Megamind) WINNER: SANS

Loki (Marvel) vs. Nagito Komaeda (Danganronpa) WINNER: KOMAEDA

Cecil Gershwin Palmer (Welcome to Night Vale) vs. Herobrine (Minecraft) WINNER: CECIL

Ingo (Pokémon) vs. Jack Skellington (the Nightmare Before Christmas) WINNER: JACK

Arataka Reigen (Mob Psycho 100) vs. Spamton (Deltarune) WINNER: REIGEN

REVIVAL ROUND: The Once-ler (The Lorax (2012)) vs. King Dice (Cuphead) WINNER: THE ONCE-LER

ROUND THREE:

Tony the Talking Clock (Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared) vs. The Once-ler (The Lorax (2012)) vs. Wheatley (Portal 2) WINNER: THE ONCE-LER

Sans (Undertale) vs. Bill Cipher (Gravity Falls) WINNER: SANS

Cecil Gershwin Palmer (Welcome to Night Vale) vs. Nagito Komaeda (Danganronpa) WINNER: CECIL

Arataka Reigen (Mob Psycho 100) vs. Jack Skellington (The Nightmare Before Christmas) WINNER: REIGEN

ROUND FOUR:

Sans (Undertale) vs. The Once-ler (The Lorax (2012)) WINNER: SANS

Arataka Reigen (Mob Psycho 100) vs. Cecil Gershwin Palmer (Welcome to Night Vale) WINNER: CECIL

ROUND FIVE/FINAL ROUND:

Sans (Undertale) vs. Cecil Gershwin Palmer (Welcome to Night Vale)

Tumblr Sexyrematch info

Howdy newbies and welcome to Tumblr, it takes a bit of setup to get this site running well so here’s what works for me. One of the neat things about this site is that its a different experience for everyone, so tailor these settings towards what you want from this site. 

New XKit 

tumblr citizenship test (uquiz)

Discovery is Killing Cartoon Network

This is a crime against art.  In fact, it’s a LOT of crimes against art.  For the love of God, be outraged.

In light of the HBO Max shitshow, can anyone please direct me toward modern guides on burning whole series to DVD?

EDIT: Feel free to reblog this to spread the word to people in-the-know and people who need the knowledge!

The Skull

-BloodyBones-

Blah

TO ALL HOMESTUCK FANS: OUR FANMADE SBURB SIMULATOR IS NOW ON STEAM (IT'S MULTIPLAYER!!!)

TELL YOUR FRIENDS, TELL YOUR FAMILY, TELL YOUR PETS, TELL YOUR 4000 KARKAT PLUSHIES, AND REBLOG THIS POST FOR THE LOVE OF GOG

The Genesis Project is now on Steam!

Featuring big quality of life changes, a complete networking rework based on Steam servers, and way more, too much to list here!

Play SBURB right now with your friends! Play it with your siblings! Play it with your teachers! Play it with your enemies! Play it with your non-fandom friends and make them suffer with you!

Download it right here, right now:

LINK TO THE STEAM PAGE FOR THE GENESIS PROJECT (EARLY ACCESS)

Link to our Discord server (talk to the devs, get updates, and find people to play with!)

Creepy girl