NATTY Acceptance Speech MMA 2023

43 + sena!

O43. A bloody kiss tw // implied fighting + mentions of drug use + blood (duh)

"You're such a fucking idiot."

"That guy grabbed your ass, Sena!" Finn groans as he's dragged into the bathroom by his wrist, hand up to his nose to stop the bleeding. Sena rolled her eyes at his reasoning, shaking her head as she shoved him against the sink.

"Who fucking cares," Sena deadpanned. She knew that wasn't the reason why Finn got into a fight with that man. Finn gets into fights because he likes to fight. He likes hitting people bigger than him, he likes knocking people down, and he likes to be in control.

Sena knew it, Finn knew it, everyone fucking knew, and yet he still tried to deny it.

Finn grunts gruffly as he removes his wrist from his bleeding nose, inhaling sharply through his teeth when he sees how much blood has poured out of his nostrils. He wondered if the man had broken his nose. It wouldn't be the first time something like that happened to Finn.

Sena quickly ripped out a handful of paper towels, turning back towards the dumbest boy she'd ever met. The crimson rivers cascading down from his nose and lips captivate her. She doesn't know why, and if she's being frank, the fascination frightens her a bit, but her senses are too shot from the adrenaline pumping into her veins.

Her big brown eyes watch as a bead of blood makes its way down his chin, leaving a long red streak down his throat. She feels her mouth dry, staring at Finn like she had seen a ghost. She thinks Finn is attractive enough on his own––Hell, she's slept with the guy more times than she can count. But this made her look at him like he was the only man on the planet. He looked so strangely beautiful.

"You know, you should be–" Sena slammed her lips to Finn's, effectively cutting him off and making him moan in surprise. His hands, once used for violence, card through her hair gently, holding the sides of her face as her lips moved feverously against his. Sena surged forward, pressing her chest against his as she bit his bottom lip to taste more of him. His blood didn't taste like copper like she thought it would. It tasted sweet, like a forbidden fruit she would never taste again but crave for her entire life.

Finn winces when her nose accidentally bumps his, turning away from her with a slight groan. Sena watched him with hazy eyes and parted lips, taking hold of his shirt to try and pull him back in, but Finn shook his head.

"Chill out, vampire. My face hurts." Finn sighs as he takes the paper towels out of her hand, pressing them under his nose to stop the bleeding, at least somewhat. Sena chuckles quietly at the nickname, smiling to herself when she can still taste his blood on her lips.

┈─ 𖧷 A DOLL’S FIRST MISTAKE, OH-SO FRAGILE ﹕ NAIYANA’S FIRST HEARTBREAK. set pre-debut. genre, angst. ( you can find me, right ? you can find me .. right ? ) featuring cracks in pseudo motherhood, themes of homophobia, and disappearances.

wide-eyed and afraid, naiyana is twelve when she first enters the jeong mansion. stark white, fluorescent pearl, soft creams. she’s almost hesitant to touch, scared to run her hands over silk curtains and velvet cushions lest they crumble underneath her feather light touch. like a mouse caught before slit eyes, the young girl jumped at every sound—foreign to her ears used to heavy silence and a gaping hole she knew someone had left but could never find the courage to open her mouth to ask. but it was never her fault, she was always reassured, treasured moments where her father would card his fingers through her hair with a reverence she’d always thought held both fear and awe. like she was a creature he was both proud and horrified of.

in the jeong mansion, she’d soon learn, there were rules. bow when you greet your elders. say good morning when you pass her, good night when exhaustion begins to gnaw at your senses. get ready for school with the perfectly tailored uniform already hanging on your closet door, but leave your hair alone until the miss—until jiho joined you and brushed your hair herself. just routine, she’d remind her every morning with a smile, and she would smile back perfectly just as she’d expect. routine was good. routine ensured progress, which in turn ensured stability. naiyana liked stability, so she worked her damndest to perfect her routine.

don’t wince when she brushed a little too hard. pretend not to hear the whispers of a daughter once lost, just like she was. she was here now. she was perfect.

at school, she meets ████, and her world alights in colors she’d never thought imaginable. long black hair almost onyx colored in some lighting, soft skin, pink lips that curved in a smile she couldn’t forget even if she tried her hardest. the gentleness ████ held her with left the now fifteen year old spiraling into a series of confusion and want, embarrassingly so, pertinent enough to hide shaking hands behind her back. her laugh, her touch, the echo of her voice. smitten. terribly so.

routine slips through her fingers like rainwater, rushing downwards with vigor. rumpled uniforms hastily thrown on to beat her to the bus stop, sock sliding down one leg, shirt half tucked. ████ would only laugh, unaware of naiyana’s poor heart beating, bursting to life as she crouched down to pull her sock up, as she drew impossibly close to straighten her collar and tuck her shirt back in. gentle, her touch fleeting, gone just as quick as it would make an appearance. it should have been an omen of sorts and yet it lit her skin up aflame, breath stuck in her throat as ████ lifted her fingers to brush wayward strands of her hair away from her face.

routine crashes and burns as naiyana falls head first into what she thinks might be love. how could this be love? she half-listens to the girls that surround her gush about their own fleeting crushes, hopping from one nameless boy to the next as soon as the one prior loses his aura of cool or mystique. how could this be love when the thought of ████ makes her want to light her very soul on fire with the knowledge that she would burn with her in tandem? that when she leans into her for too long, when her fingers brush hers when they walk side by side, when she so much as looks at her for a second too long, naiyana feels the very center of the universe blossom in her chest? how could that be love when she’s here bursting to the brim with want?

her first kiss is underneath a bus stop in the rain, sharing an umbrella and giggles and shrieks as cold water soaks into their short-sleeved shirts. wet hair plastered to her face and socks drenched wet and ████ has never looked more beautiful to her than now, stopping right in her tracks to tremble with a vigor the other girl foolishly mistakes as cold. concern flits over her features in a way that makes her heart trip and stumble, gasping wetly as wet fingertips gently run over her cheeks.

naiyana holds the umbrella when ████ kisses her, her palms warm against her face despite the chilled wind, and she thinks the world could end right then and there and she would die happy. she’s foolish when she asks for another, begs for a third, and promptly forgets about her surroundings until the telltale sound of a horn startles them apart with shy laughter and hastened running to catch a missed bus.

routine is promptly disregarded, waking up hours before the miss—jiho—does, out of the door before the older woman can even utter a good morning. naiyana wakes up with tiny braids in her hair and kisses long seeped into flushed cheeks, and forgets where she is for too long. forgets the house she’s living in, whose roof she rests her head under.

they get caught tangled in each other's arms in her garden, flower crowns in each other’s hair. jiho screams, curses ████, yanks her off their picnic blanket and back into the house before naiyana can utter a single word. she’s disheveled, a mess and a half of frazzled nerves, but she doesn’t care. she follows after them, tears budding in her eyes as her heart thuds in her ears.

she begs on her hands and knees, crying before the wild eyes of the woman who had taken her in. ugly sobs caught in her throat, she begs until her voice runs shot and her tear tracks seem to be permanently etched into her face. all she receives is a prim once over and an order to return to her room. the last time she sees ████ is when she risks a terrified glance over her shoulder, meeting the girl’s soft smile before she’s quickly ushered into her room by househelp.

jiho wakes her up now. jiho stands by as she gets ready, red hot shame lighting a fire down her spine when she settles back into her routine, brushing her hair back as if the girl in the mirror before her hasn’t been promptly unraveled. she once tried to ask about ████’s whereabouts, why she hadn’t been seeing her at school, in the halls, by the bus stop. jiho’s reflection had turned chillingly still, pausing with her hairbrush in midair like a marionette. she’d never had the guts to ask again.

she kept her head down, hid her tremors behind the perfectionism this mis—jiho wanted, and smiled when she was smiled at. said her good mornings and good nights, made sure she left the house without a single hair out of place, and tried not to cry when the lights dimmed low. jiho hated when she looked too puffy in the morning.

231106 RYUJIN — Music Bank in Mexico

( 230331 )       eunoia @ music bank       /       suhyeon

wait i’m excitedddd they look so cute and the LINE UP <33

thank youuu, ive seen ur recent gg and they're so like — omg i can't evenn, new connections 4 the flair girls for sure

WORDS TO USE INSTEAD OF NARCISSIST.

by @scaryinclusive.

presently, narcissist is a word used to define individuals with narcissistic personality disorder. a narcissistic individual is someone exhibiting traits or symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder. due to its widespread use as a derogatory, dehumanising and stigmatising label, despite its original purpose, the use of 'narcissist, narcissism and narcissistic' as an adjective, especially in an insulting, derogatory way, is ableist, sanist and stigmatising.

why should you consider altering your vocabulary and stop using words like 'narcissist' as an adjective — especially a derogatory one? please read this informative post. help the npd community out by opting to utilise less harmful, stigmatising language in your speech and writing! please note: the following words listed are not synonyms with or indicative of npd symptoms or traits. but for the context 'narcissist' is typically socially applied to, they are a beneficial replacement. feel free to reblog.

arrogant. an exaggerated sense of one's own worth or importance. this can come across as overbearing, or socially inappropriate.

selfish. very concentrated on one's own personal profit or pleasure, typically lacking consideration for others.

self-absorbed. preoccupied with one's own interests, feelings or situations.

boastful. excessive pride and self-satisfaction in one's own achievements, possessions or abilities.

braggart. same as above, just a synonym. relating more to bragging than boasting.

conceited. alternative for vain, excessively proud of oneself.

egotistical. excessively conceited or absorbed in oneself. a synonym for self-centred.

haughty. acting superior in an arrogant, disdainful way.

insolent. rude, arrogant, showing a lack of respect.

ostentatious. a pretentious or showy display, an attempt to impress.

overconfident. excessively confident, an excessive certainty in one's abilities.

proud. a deep pleasure or satisfaction gained from one's own achievements, qualities or possessions.

self-confident. trusting in one's abilities, qualities, and judgement.

self-important. an exaggerated sense of one's own value or importance.

superior. an overly high opinion of oneself. synonym for conceited.

vain. excessive high opinion of one's appearance, abilities or worth.

egocentric. thinking only of yourself, without regard for others' feelings or desires.

self-centred. preoccupied with oneself and one's affairs.

self-involved. preoccupied with oneself, not paying attention to anyone else.

smug. an excessive pride in oneself or one's achievements.

pompous. grand, self-important or solemn in a way that is insincere or pretentious.

self-serving. having concern for oneself and oneself only.

sycophant. someone who is too eager to praise or obey someone in order to gain an advantage.

complacent. smug or uncritical satisfaction with oneself or one's achievements.

vainglorious. overlay vain, excessively proud of oneself.

obnoxious. extremely unpleasant.

egoistic. relating to egoism, preoccupied with oneself, synonymous with self-centred.

callous. showing or having an insensitive or cruel disregard for others.

cruel. wilfully or deliberately causing pain / suffering to others, potentially with no remorse.

abusive / emotionally abusive. extremely offensive or insulting. a form of interaction wherein the abuser is psychologically controlling, manipulating or harming you.

manipulative. exercising control or influence over another individual or situation. can be intentional but equally can be subconscious.

self-righteous. a certainty, especially an unfounded one, that one is totally correct or morally superior.

unsympathetic. not expressing, showing or feeling sympathy towards others or a situation.

toxic. poisonous, very harmful or unpleasant in a way that is pervasive or insidious.

insidious. the proceeding of something in a gradual, subtle way, but with extremely harmful effects.

malignant. very dangerous or harmful.

Bibi Music Bank, 240216

﹫ INBLSS : you are my family, and i love you. but you’re terrible. you’re all so terrible.. › a GIRL GROUP by JUNE ( @enaeura ) . preset by KAIJUCAT on polarr .

SWAN ♡ music core interview (230708)