How Does Being Punched In The Face Feel Like

Maybe Another Life is a bizarre gravity-bending industrial horror game with a touch of reincarnation.

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hbo max blocks screenshots even when I use the snipping tool AND firefox AND ublock which is a fucking first. i will never understand streaming services blocking the ability to take screenshots thats literally free advertising for your show right there. HOW THE HELL IS SOMEBODY GONNA PIRATE YOUR SHOW THROUGH SCREENSHOTS. JACKASS

i was linked to this absolutely wild thread from 14 years ago on a forum for aquarium enthusiasts from michigan: a guy has a 90 lb rock in his aquarium that was infested with a bobbit worm (the penis thing is a misconception) that poses a threat to the rest of his fish and solicits help on how to kill it. but because he can't feed the worm poison without risking the decomposing body killing the other fish, he's doing looney tunes shit to it

Michigan Reefers

The Bobbit Worm Chronicles

So I have discovered that I have a Bobbit Worm. He is through my main piece of lace rock (90 lbs dry) so I can not remove the rock. He has p

warning for occasional pictures of scary worms that looks like jrpg bosses

I can barely contain myself right now

holy shit

HOLY SHIT

Please don't ask me for relationship advice unless you are prepared to receive some truly upsetting information because some people are ready for the "He's exhibiting the literal textbook signs of a psychological abuser and you need to get away from him before he successfully cuts you off from your support network" talk and some people aren't

people NEED to stop gatekeeping making music like ohhhh i don’t have an instrument ohhhhh i don’t know music theory ohhhhh i’m not gonna pay for some program. SHUT UP. take my hand.

you need NONE of that shit!!!!! there’s a website called beepbox.co. literally all you have to do is press things until it sounds a modicum of nice. it’s easy it’s free and it works on anything which has a browser because it’s a website.

if even ONE person starts making music bc of this post it will be worth it.

making bad music is just as important and okay as it is to write badly or draw badly or sing badly. you AREN’T BEHOLDEN TO MAKE GOOD MUSIC. making music is not utilitarian HAVE FUN. HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!!

POV you’re about to play one of the most vile games ever produced

Best tumblr scandals

The girl grave robbing and selling human bones online

The white american girl who pretended to be an interracial lesbian couple living with hiv in india, just so she could write hamilton hiv fic

The girl everyone thought was the native lesbian writer of my immortal, who wrote it to find her brother, but it turns out she was white and lied about her backstory and probably didn’t even write the fic

Russian Chaos Agents

Add more if u want, lord knows theres plenty

HOW TO SUCK DICK

If you simply wanted to get a guy off as quickly as possible, all you need to do is lock your lips at the base of his cock and suction them up and down the bottom ¾ of his shaft at a quick, steady pace while pressing your flattened tongue against the underside of his dick. Make sure you are applying pressure with both your lips AND tongue. Keeping your tongue engaged at all times is key. I try to keep mine moving at all times. This is how you get 90% of guys off. It helps me keep from gagging to hold his cock steady at the base and bring my lips down to meet my fingers. You can do this very slowly for a more intense feeling, but make sure you move at a steady rhythm. Some guys like it faster or slower; you may have to ask, or more likely, he’ll tell you. This is your power move, the one that is actually going to bring him to orgasm. A true hooker blowjob needs only this one move; if scientists were to create a blowjob machine, this is what it would do. The other moves I’m going to teach you are artistic flourishes; you use them to add flair and style to your blowjob or to slow down the action a little. SALIVA Don’t be afraid to just slobber all over his love muscle. It should be as wet and sloppy as possible, especially during your power move. A good blowjob makes loud, gross suction-y noises. When I’m done, I’m usually covered in my own drool and leave a wet spot on the bed. USING YOUR HANDS If his dick is too big for you to take the whole thing in your mouth, you’ll need to use your hand too. Slobber all over his cock for awhile first so your hand will slide easily up and down instead of just catching on his dry skin. The most important hand move is the twister. When you slide your hand up his shaft, twist your wrist. A twisting motion gets you into a smoother rhythm than the straight up and down. Slide your hand up and down on the base of his cock in conjunction with your mouth moving up and down on the rest of it. The hard part is finding the correct grip: again you may want his guidance. Another good trick is to wrap your hand around the top of his cock and put your mouth over your hand. Then slide your hand down the shaft and your mouth down on top of it in a fluid motion until your hand meets the base of his cock. It will feel like you’re sliding your mouth all the way down him even if you can’t. It’s times like these I wish I could draw; I’d make little diagrams. THE BALLS I usually start out by paying some attention to the balls. There are three basic ball moves: you can put them in your mouth and suck them (LIGHTLY), lick them with a flattened cow tongue, or tense your tongue into a point and run the tip of your tongue all over them. I alternate between all three. Sometimes I lift them up and lick underneath his balls. Also, if you cup them while you are entering the home stretch, you’ll be able to tell he’s about to cum as they get higher and tighter. THE HEAD My next move is usually to give his shaft several long licks from base to tip. This is the ice cream cone move; it looks sexy, it’s a nice touch, but it’s not going to make anybody cum. While conducting the power move, I come up from time to time to give the head a little attention: sucking on it, moving my tongue in a circle around it, and flicking my tongue over that spot on the underside that all the sex websites tell you is el sensitivo. In my experience, guys don’t really go that wild over attention to that spot, but these are just flourishes anyway. I tend to get a bit wrapped up in my work that I forget to make eye contact, so head action is a great time to look up at him with puppy dog eyes and his cock in your mouth. FACE SLAPPING I mentioned this in my tips to get him to cum faster, but at least once during the beej, I usually pop his dick out of my mouth and slap it against my tongue or face, then look at him while I rub his cock against my cheeks and lips. Guys are visual, this is just a little something dirty for him to look at. DEEP THROAT I can’t really teach you how to deep throat, that’s between you and your gag reflex. The important thing, I think, is to make an effort to take him in as deep as you can, even if it’s only for a few seconds. It’s hard to explain exactly how I do this: try concentrating on relaxing your throat and jaw. As I mentioned before, it helps me to steady his cock with my hand when I go deep, and breathing in instead of just holding your breath also helps abate that “gonna puke” feeling. THE BIG FINALE When you’re ready to finish him off, go into the power move and don’t vary your pace for anything. If you’re cupping his balls, you’ll often be able to tell when he’s about to cum as they tighten up. I speed up a little bit at the end, and when I feel him start to come I push my head down as deep as it will go and suck slowly and intensely at the base, letting his cum just shoot down my throat.

Do any of u have decent recipes that are like 5 ingredients (not including spices) and take 45 mins or less to prepare i gotta stop eating sandwiches for dinner