Reblog If You're A Sick Individual Who's Attracted To Women Over 30

Reblog if you, too, greatly desire a hot dog

“Let me make this perfectly clear. You are not saving my daughter from a dragon. She IS a dragon. You are going to protect her and keep her company until she learns how to control her magic.”

Through a series of events you find out that your party members have all been replaced by a mimic, a skinwalker, a changeling, and a shapeshifter. You don’t bring up that you know this however as they’re a lot nicer and more efficient then the ones they replaced.

You, a necromancer, were always fond of your skeleton minions. Even going as far as to make each one a personalized name tag. Then you were cut down by those blasted heroes, only to one day reopen your eyes and see an Elder Lich looming over you with a very faded name tag.

had a dream last night that terraria added a new boss called the big bigger big man that was a giant, bipedal isopod in a suit and sunglasses that was like. Super good for farming money, and once you reached literally, exactly 99, 999, 999, 999, 991 gold coins from afk farming him, he'd say something along the lines of

and then enough stacks of gold coins to fill the screen would spawn, and you could never spawn him again. He spoke in a heavy russian accent too. Nobody knew why he called the player babababa. After this you would get an achievement congratulating your gay marriage with big bigger big man.

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you're welcome

one time I was at a gaming convention when, all of a sudden, miyamoto came up to me and whispered into my ear, “Samus’s cock is canonically eight inches and thick. Try to tell them, they’ll never believe you.”

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noooo insecure tgirl. resist the siren song of the oversized hoodie. get them cute lil tiddies out for the rest of us to admire.