Does Anyone Wanna Hold Hands Until We Feel A Little Braver

I used to read dictionaries as a kid. And as a child who would casually leave social events to go read the books in a stranger's library, it was probably really funny to see me with the thickest, oldest looking dictionary I could find, so heavy I barely could even hold it, sitting with it in my lap as I read it from cover to cover

it's so weird to me that everyone on this website is a human person outside of their weird internet niche so rb this with a random bit of your lore

So, let me guess– you just started a new book, right? And you’re stumped. You have no idea how much an AK47 goes for nowadays. I get ya, cousin. Tough world we live in. A writer’s gotta know, but them NSA hounds are after ya 24/7. I know, cousin, I know. If there was only a way to find out all of this rather edgy information without getting yourself in trouble…

You’re in luck, cousin. I have just the thing for ya.

It’s called Havocscope. It’s got information and prices for all sorts of edgy information. Ever wondered how much cocaine costs by the gram, or how much a kidney sells for, or (worst of all) how much it costs to hire an assassin?

I got your back, cousin. Just head over to Havocscope.

((PS: In case you’re wondering, Havocscope is a database full of information regarding the criminal underworld. The information you will find there has been taken from newspapers and police reports. It’s perfectly legal, no need to worry about the NSA hounds, cousin ;p))

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I swear this post deserves to be considered a piece of national history or something

first day as a second century warlord i have my men tie branches to their horses’ tails to stir up dust and make it look like there’s a lot of us but i forget it just rained so there isn’t any dust and the enemy can clearly see there’s like twenty of us all spread out in a line

I am imploring everyone who sees this to read the notes. Probably the funniest stuff I've read today.

Getting smaller with each kiss while they get bigger with each kiss

Being small is great. Getting shrunk is even better. Getting shrunk by someone loving on you is the best.

this is something nobody realizes, and yet it's the most devastating truth of human existence.

Reblogging for two reasons

A: Never have I read anything more scarily accurate than this

B:OMGG BOOKS OF BEGINNING FANS IN THE WILD???

so, you know the nightmare before christmas? you know the three kids that are oogie boogie's henchpeople? the two idiot boys dressed as a skeleton and a demon, and the bossy done-with-this girl dressed as a witch? these kids:

they have the exact same energy as jake, beetles, and abigail

Six signs you're making a poor decision:

i. you avoid input from people you respect

ii. you don't consult the Word of God

iii. you don't pray for God's leading

iv. it doesn't build you spiritually

v. it undermines your integrity

vi. it leads you to temptation

A boy can dream, can't he?