Y'all. How To Bread Your Dragon Was Not Supposed To Be Literal, But Since I Posted That I Cannot Stop

In another universe Hiccup really is the best bread making Viking Berk has ever seen.

HE SAID THE THING??? CANONICALLY??? SNOTLOUT????

Here’s the summary of my Httyd Princess bride AU fanfiction and some other stuff about it.

Astrid truly didn’t pay much actual attention to the farm boy who tended to the dragons. Still, nothing gave her as much pleasure as ordering Hiccup around.

“Farm boy, tend to Stormfly.” She would snap. “Clean the stables!” She would order. Farm boy, do this. Do that.

And every time without fail he would say, “as you wish.”

It was all he ever said to her.

Roles:

Princess Buttercup: Astrid

Wesley/dread pirate Robert’s: Hiccup

Inigo Montoya: Tuffnut

Fezzik: Fishlegs

Vizzini: Snotlout

Prince Humperdinck: Dagur

Count Rugen: Heather

And other characters will make an appearance, they just don’t have as big roles

I’m always going to believe that Waddles is immortal. No that pig doesn’t have a lifespan what do you mean? He dies when Mabel dies and that’s it.

That pig is going to live on forever

"No one gets to kill you but me"

I'm listening

Hiccup's friendship with the other Dragon Riders is so special to me.

Fuck queerbating. Your favs are canon.

Massive fan of a lot of rtte just being Hiccup giving people unimpressed looks

Writing a fic is so weird. I’ll be reading it over and crying because I want to read more but it’s not written yet. But then I realize that I control that because I’m the author. Man 😔

I’ll do you one better. The flags discover these fanfictions exist and they all take turns reading them out loud while at The Old World with alcohol. They end up on the floor laughing at the end, mainly making fun of how Lippmann’s fans view him in the y/n dreamy perspective. They’d have the time of their lives.

Do you guys think in the bungou universe people write wattpad fics where they put their hair in a messy bun, put on converse, and come downstairs to find out that their mom is selling them to Lippmann?