LETS FUCKING GOOOOO

Things that work in fiction but not real life

torture getting reliable information out of people

knocking someone out to harmlessly incapacitate them for like an hour

jumping into water from staggering heights and surviving the fall completely intact

calling the police to deescalate a situation

rafting your way off a desert island

correctly profiling total strangers based on vibes

effectively operating every computer by typing and nothing else

ripping an IV out of your arm without consequences

heterosexual cowboy

Based

The army really asked "Hey, what do you think would fit the aesthetic of employing vulnerable teenagers to risk their lives over a nefarious goal they don't even know, I'm asking because we want to set up a recruiting event at the Anime Con".

Then some PR lackey was like, "you won't believe it I know the exact show"

So, let me guess– you just started a new book, right? And you’re stumped. You have no idea how much an AK47 goes for nowadays. I get ya, cousin. Tough world we live in. A writer’s gotta know, but them NSA hounds are after ya 24/7. I know, cousin, I know. If there was only a way to find out all of this rather edgy information without getting yourself in trouble…

You’re in luck, cousin. I have just the thing for ya.

It’s called Havocscope. It’s got information and prices for all sorts of edgy information. Ever wondered how much cocaine costs by the gram, or how much a kidney sells for, or (worst of all) how much it costs to hire an assassin?

I got your back, cousin. Just head over to Havocscope.

((PS: In case you’re wondering, Havocscope is a database full of information regarding the criminal underworld. The information you will find there has been taken from newspapers and police reports. It’s perfectly legal, no need to worry about the NSA hounds, cousin ;p))

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kisses on top of my sweet little head deficiency

Can someone make this with Fuck me so I can annoy my boyfriend with it :3

I spent like 5 hours editing this gif frame by frame to make this shitty edit that I wanted to exist

theyre unlocking new types of guy over on reddit apparently

Amazing how people can see someone say love is the meaning of life and be bitter about it. As someone who barely wants to be alive what's keeping me here is love. Love island the point of life and it makes the shit life throws at us barrable.

LOVE IS THE WHOLE POINT. OF IT ALL