I'M LITERALLY EXPLODING Y'ALL LOOK AT THIS ANIMATION PLEASE!!!!

I kinda feel like I kind of grew up like this:

Little kid (kinda gender neutral childhood, I didn't feel pressured to be anything. I looked like a little girl, but my childhood was more masculine kinda) -> hell™️ (puberty, first E puberty hopefully I'll have my T puberty soon!) -> purgatory (my current stage, waiting to move out and start my life.)

I was very detached from femininity most of my life; I have and had masculine hobbies and interests, stuff like that, but it's like I was cursed to grow up in a body that didn't suit me.

It kinda feels like I was not a female-looking and feeling person until my puberty.

Hope this made sense!

The trans FTM experience of not knowing how to feel about your detachment from femininity and growing up a woman

Spoilers for I Saw The Tv Glow under cut

This movie hit very deep for me, almost in a primal sense. I'm shaking typing this out and after watching it. I don't understand it 100% but I feel like the message hit me in some way that is hard to comprehend. I sketched this out very quickly, so that's why it kind of sucks.

It's hard to describe why I enjoyed it so much, but I throughly enjoyed it.

Headcannon time: There are several scenes in games where Lu is shown sleeping so I’ve decided that Luigi is a nappy, sleepy boy! He can fall asleep anywhere at anytime and loves to doze off whenever he can!

Diary Entry #16

Cw family stuff and substance abuse

Just listened to Like Him by Tyler the Creator and Lola Young and HOLY SHIT, OOF OUCH MY GODDAMN FEELINGS. I have a bio dad who I have a love-hate relationship with, I don't think I've ever really explained it here so I'm gonna try.

My bio dad has substance abuse issues; any drug you can name, he's done. He's a liar and a thief, a bastard, really. But I can talk with him about videogames and just forget everything. He might die soon because he's not seeking professional help. I've kind of hardened my heart to him, but I forgot about everything I have against him and enjoy a conversation with someone who has similar interests.

I wish he didn't have that problem. We would've been best friends. He's also really into conspiracy theories and shit and also thinks trans people are evil (but not gay people since he has a gay friend.) So that would've gotten in the way if we were close, but we could've worked through it hopefully.

I hate him for how he and my bio mom neglected me as a child, but I can't stand to hate him after seeing him as a real person. It's like how much I say I hate my grandparents, but they're people too. I want them to do something awful, so I can "deserve" to hate them. I may get my "wish" in the future, it just depends how me moving out and transitioning goes.

The last part of "Like Him" is relatable as fuck, it makes me sad to listen to it even though it's a great song.

I don't know, I guess that's it.

i can’t say “angry birds ratios a transphobe” was on my 2023 bingo card, but i’m not disappointed

Thinking about buying myself a binder… but how would I hide the purchase? Idk it makes me anxious. Still living with my grandparents.

otherwise interesting post ruined by the bold insistence that you can never accidentally abuse someone & that all abusive people are self-aware evil masterminds

I'm autistic, mentally ill and take SSRI's. I may be fucked I fear.

I hate RFK with my whole soul, and my grandparents still love the guy and the rest of trump's goons.

Hmmm. I wake up to hear RFK suggesting we ban all SSRI mental health medications and send the mentally ill, autistic, asthmatic, and obese people to government run “Wellness Camps” for 3-4 years each.

Huh…. So he wants to “concentrate” the population of sick people in camps where they will work in the outdoors.

Because that fixes autism? All because he believes, with no scientific basis, that these conditions are caused by vaccines. Since President Musk says he has autism I wonder if he will be in a camp, too?

How long will it take to come up with a final solution to that problem…

Master Doc with Abortion Funds for Every State

I fw old plushies so hard you guys don't understand. I have furbies, beanie babies, I have so so many plushies that I'm surrounded by them on my bed at all times