Be Gay, Trans And Alive

Thinking about buying myself a binder… but how would I hide the purchase? Idk it makes me anxious. Still living with my grandparents.

True. Happened to me (I made the post not the art)

Diary entry #15

Feeling a little bit better. I've been reading a lot recently, the pvz comics and also "american teenager" which is a book about trans kids' perspectives! It's really good so far!

My brain is whirring with different fanfic ideas.

I ordered a crazy dave figure and sunflower plushie and I'm so excited!! I wish they shipped soon but whatever i guess lol

This is the first line of official pvz merch in forever. I wish they made an Edgar Zomboss figure or plushie or whatever but I'll take what I can get haha!

I know I'm just distracting myself from the horrible reality ahead but it's nice to be distracted sometimes

I think I'm at like peak hyperfixation when it comes to plants vs zombies; idk how much longer it's going to last but judging on my other hyperfixations it might be a year or more before it fully fades.

[ID: a screenshot of a Youtooz pre-order with a Crazy Dave figure and Sunflower plush /END ID]

Diary entry #2

I want to make some pvz butcher vanity fanart SO BAD but for some reason I keep putting it off. I saw this post about not being able to put your blorbos in situations can be depression and like. yeah that's true.

Butcher Vanity is an amazing song btw

Probably gonna make some MAMA chicken ramen soon

I have underlying dysphoria that just seems to get worse every day. I look at men irl and online that are cool looking and I get so jealous it makes me angry. I'm still stuck in this shell I can hardly recognize, something that can be fixed or made better but I'm not allowed. I can't even cut my hair short for christ's sake.

Started Gravity Falls last night, gonna try to watch an episode a day; for some reason I have problems watching shows/playing videogames even if they're really good. When I was a little kid I didn't have that issue.

I could be that transmasc friend!!

every transfem needs a little transmasc friend who had a cannibalism or horror phase for a few months to years and is obsessed with blood and every transmasc needs a little transfem friend who has rejected humanity and identifies as a dog & has memories of being a computer

*incredible art made by one of the official pvz comic artists, ron chan!

Nah but let’s talk abt how ppl use disability terms/harmful stereotypes/ derogatory words so casually this disabled pride month (tw ableism below)

The new terms are “sch*zoposting” and “delulu” but shit like this has been around for years and it’s so incredibly frustrating.

Another example is those TikTok POVS about “the weird kid in class” but they are all stereotypes of autistic ppl.

Or the misuse of the word triggered, the misuse of the word OCD, the misuse of gaslighting, of cr*pple, “are you deaf?” “Are you blind?” “Hellen Keller isn’t real.” I could go on and on but I will simply say this.

Disabled people are real people with feelings, emotions and lives. We deserve to use the terms that we need to COMFORTABLY. We deserve to exist without people taking the language used in the context of ourselves and putting it in a negative light.

We deserve to exist.

We deserve happiness.

Check in on your disabled friends.

Don’t assume things about people you don’t know.

I have been thinking the last several days about the horror of being mutilated as a intersex baby, or an intersex teen/kid. I'm perisex, and over the last few years (mostly in the last year) are the only times I've heard about intersex people.

How can this happen to so many people?? How has this gone under the radar?? It's a human rights abuse, and nobody is doing anything about it. Sometimes I can be naïve, but I would hope that the world isn't this cruel.

I have a lot to learn about a lot of things, but I hope to learn as much as I can.

Sorry if this sounds stupid

people really fail to see the physical violence behind the hyperinvisibility of intersex people.

we are erased in legislation and society broadly but we are also victims of an extermination campaign.

our invisibility doesn't come from people just failing to recognize us it comes from the fact that we are mutilated at birth and if we are not mutilated at birth we are mutilated at puberty. people without variations that can be changed by surgery are put on hormones against their will. it is rare to find an intersex person who hasn't experienced medical violence!

so many intersex people don't even know that they, themselves are intersex! some people have their intersex variation hidden from them, being outright lied to by parents and doctors about their own body. other people are never given the word intersex, they are told they have a DSD (disorder of sexual development), that they have a medical problem. almost no intersex person is told that they are intersex by a doctor.

our lack of visibility is written in literal blood. so when someone tries to say "well, intersex people don't have it that bad, no one is thinking about them" they're saying that all this "isn't so bad" that an effective extermination campaign "isn't that bad" because they can't see it happening.

I AM SCREAMING HOLY SHIT TOMODACHI LIFE WAS MY SHIT WHEN I WAS A KID!!!