Aureostuff - Obey Me Stuff

Where do I even begin? I'm appalled. The Canadian government living up to its roots in colonial-settler violence... this is beyond criminal. Contact your MP's. This erasure and anti-Palestinian racism is unacceptable.

For anyone reading this on or after February 26th, 2024 -here is more information/updates:

I think two of my favorite readers are fast food reader and everglades reader 🥰

Also the everglades reader posts immediately reminded my of Fluffy (the comedian) skit about the crocodile hunter. (Cant remember the actually words just the touch part lol).

Ever!reader: you see that?! That one right there has a bite force equal to biting into a boiled carrot! / This one is so venomous it could paralyze you faster than it take for you to fall to the floor!!

...

Ever!reader: I'm gonna touch/poke it! 🥰

"You see this little guy right here? This right here is a wandering spider - one of the most venomous spiders in the world. Nausea, severe pain, abdominal cramps, erections that can last for hours, breathing difficulties that can lead to death if not treated soon enough...."

You count off the small percentage of the list of symptoms you've mentioned so far with your fingers as the drider looms behind you. Little was quite the broad term to use for it. The creature was large enough to where they could probably fit your entire head between their fangs has they wished. It ponders how a human could be so brave to turn their back on a beast of their kind while rambling on about the very side effects they have a probable chance of inflicting you with at any given moment. Perhaps it was stupidity. Either way, the spider was positively enthralled by you and your nulled sense of danger. How on earth has a person like yourself survived out here for so long?

"Anyway, I'm gonna poke them."

The drider shifts - given little to no time to process your words as your finger pads the fuzzy layer of skin right where a nose would be if they had one. You laugh as all six of their eyes point towards the area of their face where your hand had touched.

"Boop!...See, this little guy is chill. Barely any reaction at all"

True be told, the drider was too stunned to move a muscle. No one's ever had the nerve to touch them like that. And which such a carefree attitude too. You truly had zero regards for your own safety -

Which only meant if you ended up in the spider's web there's really no one to blame for your disappearance but yourself. If anything they'd be doing you a favor by taking your well-being into their own hands.

The secret Dungeon Meshi sauce that's getting people to eat better is that it's so non-judgmental. Senshi and the rest of the gang never talk about what not to eat besides things that taste bad and literal poison. They don't even talk about "health" that much besides the importance of a balanced diet. It's so much easier to eat well when you think of food simply as something your body needs, and that it's often worth the extra effort to make it taste good, especially when you understand how to connect "things your body needs" with "things that taste good"

For Gaza

reblog to let people know you were here before the great twitter migration

Demon Roommate P.2

Part 1 

Gender Neutral Reader: They/Them pronouns

Human!Demon Brothers/Demon!Mc

Lucifer woke up to MC, the demon they met, staring at him. 

He sighed, so yesterday wasn’t a figment of his imagine. MC smiled, “Good morning, Luci.” Lucifer glared at them, “Don’t call me that, anyways what time is it?” 

“One in the morning.”

Lucifer stared at them, MC stared back. It was like a staring contest. Lucifer sighed once more, “Don’t lie.” MC chuckled “That was fast, I even messed with the clock and closed the curtains.” Lucifer got up, he went over to his closet, picking out the clothes he was going to wear today.

MC looked over his shoulder “Can I choose what you’re gonna wear?” Lucifer, clothes in hand, spoke one word, “No.” 

MC whined, “Come oooon! I promise you you’ll look good.” “It’s not just about looking good, it’s also about looking presentable.” Lucifer explained to them as he walked out of his room and headed to the bathroom.

MC followed him, they ended up bumping into him as he made an abrupt stop at the bathroom. Lucifer turned to the demon, “You will not follow me into the bathroom without permission, understood?” MC had a dirty thought “What do you mean by ‘without permission?” 

Is this guy an idiot?

“Wi-” MC interrupted him, “Are you implying that if I have permission to enter it means that you’d want to do something with me? Perhaps something se-!” Lucifer punched you, his face red, “Stay out of the bathroom.” 

-

You rubbed your bruise with some raw, cold, meat. None of the other brothers had woken up yet. Lucifer had left for work, so you basically had nothing to do except annoy the other brothers.

After only fifteen seconds you went up the stairs. Entering the room of the second oldest brother. His upper body was nude, his lower half covered by a blanket. Ramen cups littered on the floor along with countless other items.

Disgusting

You thought, his place was like a pigsty. You couldn’t stand the fact that your house was being vandalized like this.

You grabbed a box from the floor and proceeded to slam it against Mammon’s head.

He yelled in pain, “Fuck!” He turned towards you, he grit his teeth “The fuck was that for eh?!” you rolled your eyes, “Stop whining, I was only using five percent of my strength. Anyways, on to the matter on hand.” you continued “I want you to clean your room.”

“Pfft, as if The Great Mammon would take orders from you.” 

You laughed, you proceeded to threaten him with, “If you don’t clean your room right now I will use all of my strength to crack your skull in two.” He got out of bed right away, “Yessir!” he had seemed to forgotten he was buck naked, you blushed madly “P-put on some clothes first, Mammoron!” His eyes widened and he blushed “Get outta ‘ere!” he was throwing anything he could at you, including his boxers.

“Wow, thanks for the underwear, Mammon.” 

He was as red as a tomato “Give ‘em back!” you smiled, “Gladly.”