Half Ghosts Can't Sleep Normally. Ghosts Don't Need To Rest For Long And They Don't Sleep The Way Mortals

Hypothetical New Type Of Guy:

A guy who regards "virginity" in the same way European colonialism defines "untouched nature". Nobody else who has been here before is relevant enough to matter, other men might as well not exist. Every woman that he has not personally fucked is a virgin.

Training the Bat Way (aka Bruce’s Terrible Parenting 101)

Bruce Wayne, aka the Dark Knight, aka the absolute worst, has this little training exercise that the entire family unanimously despises. He calls it “building resilience” or “preparing for the unexpected.” The rest of the family calls it Bruce’s stupid sleep-deprivation kidnapping game.

Here’s how it works: Bruce waits until you’re at your absolute lowest—after a grueling week of non-stop patrols, minimal sleep, and a near-catastrophic Gotham meltdown. Once you’ve finally collapsed into a dead sleep (and sometimes, after he’s sneakily slipped you a sedative to make sure you stay asleep), he picks you up, sticks you on a plane, and drops you off in the middle of nowhere. Sometimes it’s a remote village in the mountains; sometimes it’s the bustling heart of a city on the other side of the planet. The challenge? Find your way home.

Occasionally, Bruce will leave you with some supplies: a wallet, maybe a burner phone, a little equipment if he’s feeling generous. But more often than not, you’ll wake up with absolutely nothing. No money, no ID, no tools—just the clothes on your back and a pounding headache from whatever the hell Bruce drugged you with.

Some highlights of Bruce’s 'training' include:

• Dick waking up in the middle of Germany with nothing but his expired driver’s license and missing socks (He'd hidden cash in them, so he can only guess Bruce found it).

• Steph regaining consciousness in Iceland with a crumpled €5 euro and zero idea how to exchange it for local currency.

• Damian waking up in the middle of the Sahara Desert. No gear. No money. Nothing but sand and the distant memory of Bruce’s smug face.

• Tim once took over a month to get home from a tiny town in Thailand. By the time he made it back to Gotham, he’d created an entire fake identity, complete with forged documents, an elaborate backstory, and several new international contacts. Bruce called it “impressive.” Tim called it traumatizing.

• Cass, of course, took this completely in stride. Woke up in India, dismantled a shady criminal organization she stumbled across, and then casually returned to Gotham two days later like nothing had happened. When asked how she managed it, she just shrugged.

• Duke waking up in the Grand Canyon with his phone at 1% and a granola bar in his pocket. He got home in less than a day, having hitched a ride, bartered his way onto a train, and charmed a group of tourists into helping him. He also got himself a pet chameleon on the way, somehow.

• Jason refuses to talk about his turn, but based on the suspicious amount of diplomatic immunity he now has in several Eastern European countries, it’s safe to say he didn’t play by Bruce’s rules.

If they’re lucky, Bruce leaves them somewhere within the U.S., in which case the Wayne name might help speed up the process. But outside of the States? Forget it. Flashing a “Wayne” credit card can cause more problems than it solves (That's if they're even lucky enough to have a credit card to flash in the first place).

To the rest of the family, this whole thing is less of a “training exercise” and more of a weird, sadistic game Bruce plays when he thinks they’re getting too soft. And no matter how many times they complain, Bruce insists it’s “for their own good.” Because of course he does.

The thing is, they all do get home. Eventually. And yeah, maybe they come back stronger or sharper or whatever excuse Bruce uses to justify it. But at what cost? (Mostly their sanity and a burning hatred of international airline fees.)

Still, the Bats have learned to adapt. They’ve formed their own set of unspoken rules:

1. Always keep some emergency cash hidden somewhere on your person (And hope Bruce doesn't find it, because he will take it).

2. Never, ever fully trust that glass of water Bruce hands you after patrol.

3. And if you wake up in the middle of nowhere, the first step is simple: curse Bruce Wayne’s name as loudly and creatively as possible. Then get to work.

Because at the end of the day, they will get home. And they’ll probably sucker-punch Bruce the second they do.

The Whispering God- DCxDP prompt

There is a god that belongs to no pantheon. You don't pray to them as they do not need favor or give blessings by your will. They have no alter as they don't have a place they dwell.

They are only a rumor as only those that have heard him can speak of him.

It is said that you will hear him whisper in your ear a message only for you. He will tell you what is needed. His words were fate.

When Clytemnestra slayed her husband it was he who told her that it would be so and that she was right to do it. But the gods of greek denied her.

He whispered into the ear of Pierre Picaud that he was right to feel betrayed and inspired the story of the Count of Monte Cristo.

Here and there and everywhere he would whisper his words. If you listen to his words you will do something in wrath.

When a poacher kills elephants for ivory it is he who tells the elephants to stampede.

He will suggest that a plug be pulled here or a request left unfinished there.

He is considered an evil god that dwells in the back of their mind. So many disregard his existence, after all, he rarely is heard. Many don't think he exists at all.

So the only ones who have the chance to hear him are the ones willing to hear him are those desperate enough to listen.

Then there are the few to hear him well. Who feel him deep within. They are the chosen. When a human digs too deep that they catch the eyes of a divine. They are opened to a deeper understanding of the world.

Poe who saw the outline of despair and blessed with their misery. Shakespeare who wanted to create dreams made reality. And a family of bats who see feel the quiet rage of this god.

Yes, each of them has heard the call. The patriarch did not listen, however. He felt but did not answer. But his sons did.

Rage, vengeance, and the desire to correct the wrongs of this world flowed their their blood.

He squeezed the throat of the eldest boy when his hated enemy taunted him for his brother's death. He answered and took their life in return.

He chose the once dead revenant as his champion. To carry the light of vindication and create a balance where the light is dying.

The middle boy's heart was festered with indignation. He saw the dreadful arch that led before him and drove deeper in to the dark to drag truth out of it.

The only one with eyes to see him was resilient but he listens. Deep down he listens. He fights the shadows but he too will embrace them in time.

Then the youngest. He only learned through death the call. Still young he does not hear properly yet. But the whisperers will find him. They have already started showing him the way carved by the family he was born to.

Each has carried the torch into the dark. Cursed by the Whispering God. They can reject or embrace it but they must bear it unknowingly. A God that does not accept worship or acknowledgement but will not be ignored.

Because it's not fair. Revenge is justice. It is order. It is healing. It will be had.

So Billy is 17, doesn’t matter if he’s homeless or adopted, but the League or his family still don’t know that he Captain Marvel.

One day, he gets caught in a summon.

The summoning turns out to be a marriage contract. Billy is now married to the eldritch ghost king. Who was also not happy.

After sending the cultist to hell, the ghost king transforms into a teenager. Danny Fenton

Huh, he could work with this. Billy transforms as well.

They start working together to find a way to break off the marriage. There isn’t one. They are stuck together. And because both of them have enemies, they can’t exactly tell people that they’re married

Eventually, they learn to like each more than friends. One day, Marvel is in a meeting and someone asks him what he’s doing after work,

Marvel: oh! I’m watching that new horror movie with my husband :))

Leaguers: ….

Marvel: he was so excited to see it I couldn’t say no!

Leaguers: you’re married???

Marvel: … it was supposed to be a secret… shit…

Shenanigans

- marvel is getting his butt whipped by a new villain, Danny shows up as elderitch monster (“not my husband, bitch!”)

- JLA holiday party? Billy brings elderitch Danny

- Dani pops up:

Dani: hiya papa!!

Marvel: Dani! What are you doing here?

Dani: just stopping by to see my papa :))

Marvel: aww :))

Leaguers: aww….?

-when Billy identify is revealed;

Leaguer: I can’t believe you made up a fake husband!

Billy: oh Danny is real!

Leaguers: but he’s not your husband, right?

Billy: :))

Leaguers: ….right??

we usually think of mood as a scale from 1-5, but there's actually a negative scale too, where the frown turns back into a smile, but just a little insane !

I, honestly, need Jason picking up Bruce's arguments during fights and using them back on him. In the most unexpected moments. Just imagine Bruce getting mad during another of their patrols, and in the middle of the screaming session, Jason just switches and doubles him with his own phrases.

Jason: Okay, that's enough. You are benched from being my side-kick.

Bruce, flabbergasted: Excuse me?

Jason: You heard me. This is unspeakable violence you are displaying here, by the way.

Bruce: ???

Bruce: You are not going to berate me for smashing CRANE to the wall a few times.

Jason: Oh, why not?

Bruce: That was— That is justified.

Jason: Well, who do you think you are to decide what is justified and what is not? Huh, lad?

Bruce:

Bruce: Hood, that's—

Jason: Am I right, boys?

Tim, chewing on the popcorn: Yep, yep. Also hit him with a "What example are you showing to your little brother?" line for me.

Jason: Noted.

Bruce: ???????

Bruce: This is ridiculous. I can't stress enough how—

Jason: I am not your father to deal with this, B.

Bruce: I—

Bruce: Wait, when did I say something like that to you?

Jason: Before I ran away and died? Lol

Bruce: ...

Bruce: Oh. Shit.

The people of Fawcett know that behind the mask of Captain Marvel is a homeless kid with trust issues. Billy knows that they know. And now he and the town have this whole "I don't know Captain Marvel is a homeless kid" thing going on whenever any hero comes to Fawcett for any reason.

Flash: Dude, your town is so cool!

Marvel: Thanks. The townspeople and I are trying to make the town look more presentable.

Mrs. Wortwood: Captain, we're having a family dinner tonight. My daughter really wants to see you.

Marvel: Thanks for the offers. I'll definitely be there.

Flash: I wish I could be invited to family dinners by my townspeople, too.

Mr. Chuck: Captain, it's nice to see you at this hour.

Marvel: Evil never sleeps, at least not in Gotham.

Mr. Chuck: I see, visitors in town. I'll say hello when I see them.

Marvel: Thank you, Mr. Chuck, it was nice talking to you.

Batman: Marvel, what's a regular old man doing on the roof of a building at one in the morning?

Marvel: I don't know. He's a regular chimney sweep.

Hal: Why is that woman looking at me so weird?

Marvel: I don't know?

Miss Bambi, who saw Green Lantern playfully slap Captain on the butt: *quietly drinks tea*

Kids on the playground: Captain! We're missing a player!

Marvel: Sorry, on a mission.

Kids: Okay! Good luck!

Superman: Everyone's so sweet with you.

So yeah, they're pretty good actors. The only thing Billy doesn't know is that the townspeople have a plan for revenge if the League finds out Captain Marvel is a kid and kicks him out. They even have a kryptonite pitchfork! And plenty of fire starters. It's also worth mentioning that the magical creatures have joined in on the plan. The fairies are giggling and collecting or stealing kryptonite, giving Batman a run for his money, which makes him paranoid that someone is buying or stealing kryptonite in huge quantities. There's clearly some kind of conspiracy brewing.

The League has no idea what kind of bomb they'll detonate if they kick Captain Marvel out of the League.

The need has been satiated. The hug has been given.

T H E H U G M O N S T E R H A S B E E N F E D

I am currently feeling a strong urge to hug someone. I want to smother someone with affection.

T H E H U G M O N S T E R I S H U N G R Y

Mooom stop, You're Embarassing Meee

The Justice League and Young Justice were too late, the summoning had been completed and whatever creature the cult had chosen to wreck havoc on earth was coming out of an ominous green portal.

The head popped out. It looked as if a piece of space was trying to imitate a human head but the constant movement made it appear as if it was burning and flowing underwater at the same time. A halo made up of floating pieces of ice gathered behind its head, glowing and rearranging itself to look like a wheel with never ending details. To top it all of a crown the deepest black anyone has seen sat ontop of it's head, embedded with five beautiful blue jewels. However, the longer anyone stared at them the more the jewels started to look like eyes.

The head turned towards the cult members, freezing them in a blink of an eye, the attack too fast for them to comprehend. It then set its sights on them, scanning the heroes before a giant hand?...Claw?... Some weird mixture of both reached out towards them with insane speed.

"SUPERBOY!"

Someone shouted but it was too late, the creature already had him in its grasp and bring him up to its face and–...actually, it doesn't seem to be harming him at all, much to everyone's confusion. Furthermore it is as if it was...lovingly nuzzling him?

Superboy looked red in the face and rather embarassed?

"Mommm, stop, you're embarassing me infront of my team."

"MOM?!"

can someone mansplain the entire history of Billy Batson Captain Marvel, the Shazamily, and Fawcett City to me??? or at least like. . . the main parts