I’m Trying To Get Angry But I’m Very Tired And All I Can Manage Is Deep, Unyielding Sorrow: A Memoir

dude shut up. i know how to cum i just dont feel like proving it alright

experimental linguists hard at work in a top secret facility to discover the Ultimate Universal Slur

If you’re scrolling through tumblr trying to distract yourself from something you don’t want to think about or you’re looking for a sign that everything will be okay, this is it. So, breathe. Relax into this moment. You’re alive & that’s all that matters.

Since Kung Pow Penis is coming back into the tumblrina’s arsenal, and new users are supposedly coming here from twitter who might not know in the first place, I think people need a bit of a reminder how to use it properly. You should only start or continue a KPP attack if OP is the one you’re trying to use it on. If you use it on somebody who added to the post, they won’t see shit past the initial K, and a potentially undeserving OP will have their notifications spammed by stray letters for ages.

With great power comes great responsibility, and with great Kung Pow comes great Penis.

All you fuckers are like “pop tarts are ravioli!” “Uncrustables are ravioli!”

I will hit you in the face with the concepts of convergent evolution and analogous structures

The only thing more powerful than a hyper focus is

me: does absolutely nothing all day for the 24th day in a row

chronic illness: big day right bud?? You deserve a nap!!!! snzzzzzz 😴 you can do the tasks u have been needing to do tomorrow !!!

me: does absolutely nothing all day for the 25th day in a row

chronic illness: big day right b