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Garashir be like: what if I forgave you for all your crimes that arent mine to forgive, my crimes arent even my own anyway?

What if you didn't think the crime of my existence abominable?

What if we were Angels cast down by our fathers, sheltered by foreign gods, defending lands we could never call home?

What if i didn't know how to be good? What if i didn't even know how to be myself?

What if i thought myself fundamentally unloveable? What if I loved you anyway?

What if it didn't matter? What if you were my only constant? What if I couldn't have you so i rebuilt my world in your image?

What if my arms remember the shape of you when all i am is rotted away?

Garashir Be Like: What If I Forgave You For All Your Crimes That Arent Mine To Forgive, My Crimes Arent

More Posts from Bleuuughhh-blog and Others

3 months ago

#star trek ds9 #garak #dukat #damar #"plain-and-simple" garak #actually-simple damar

My favorite thing about Damar is that he’s just a dude. Garak and Dukat are constantly scheming, speaking in euphemisms all the time, never fully honest with anyone around them or even truly with themselves, and Damar is just like, there. Like he proves this isn’t a Cardassian thing, they’re just Like That.

Dukat, talking about killing someone: I’ll make the necessary arrangements to ensure they’re properly taken care of.

Garak, talking about killing someone: You can rest assured I will do all that is in my power to make sure their stay is as pleasant as possible. But,, once they’re back in their own ship, it’s simply out of my hands.

Damar, talking about killing someone: We should have them killed.

1 month ago

Is that a valid argument in your pants or is it just a phallacy?

2 months ago
It's Both Of Them
It's Both Of Them

It's both of them

3 weeks ago
bleuuughhh-blog - Blegggggghhhh- Blog
bleuuughhh-blog - Blegggggghhhh- Blog
bleuuughhh-blog - Blegggggghhhh- Blog

The crash was sudden. Instinct brought him to his feet and took his eyes to the corners, the shadows--all empty. The world sharpened, every sound and movement painted across his senses in sudden vibrant color. Not an explosive. Ever since Ab-Tzenketh that was the first, quivering question his mind asked. Not an explosive. No steps, no voices. The walls were whole, and the silence remained undisturbed save for the quiet scrape of chair as the doctor stood. They stared suspiciously at one another across the stretch of table. “What was that?” Bashir asked finally. “You tell me, Doctor.” “You can’t seriously think it has something to do with me?” Oh, I can, Doctor. But in this case, he didn’t. The taut alertness in the doctor’s body was entirely unfeigned. “No, merely that you have the better hearing.” “It—it came from the kitchen. Sounded like crashing
or falling.” Garak’s fingers found the grip of the disruptor tucked at his hip and pushed through into the kitchen. The room stood as placid as he’d left it, a few dishes sitting innocent on the counter, a half-drunk bottle of kanar decanted and casting a long, still shadow in the moonlight. Room empty. Windows unbroken. Blinds drawn. But something—something is different— The teapot. He found her sprawled, hidden by the bulk of the counter, at the jamb of the backdoor. The door itself lay cracked on its hinges, and, outside, the nightlocusts screeched, grating across the grayscale silence all around. She’d pulled a shelf down as she fell, the ceremonial teapot scattered in jagged crumbs around her. Garak had seen plenty of corpses in his time. After a while, contrary to what most imagined, one grew inured. Eventually the glazed serenity of the eyes, the stiffness of the limbs, the eerie stillness of chest and mouth were mere details to be noted just as one might note height or eye color or symmetry of face. No, the sight of death hadn’t affected him for many years. What he’d never quite grown immune to was the sight of the dying. Shivering agony in the eyes. Fluttering, soundless lips. The clutch of hands
Loral
 Every one of her gray hairs was still perfectly in place. It seemed obscene. “Garak? Is everything alright?” The human’s voice was small. “Oh, God. Is she—wait--“ Before Garak could object, the doctor was crouched beside him, finger to Loral’s ashen temple. He took two breaths, brow furrowed, then switched to her wrist. A terrible keening sound. The doctor’s voice transformed, calm and strong in a way Garak wouldn’t have thought possible for one so young. “Loral, listen to me. You may be having a heart attack.” She shook her head in silent terror. Pressed her hand to the center of her chest. “Yes, but it’s alright: I have everything necessary to handle it in the medkit downstairs.” Garak didn’t register what he was saying until the doctor’s urgent, commanding eyes pressed against his. “In the medkit downstairs.” Garak sprang to retrieve it. The medkit he found in the laboratory was Parmak’s, the rugged hide bag with the small stitching of the Hebitian sun on the corner. Garak had bought it when Parmak got his job with the Bureau. A gift. Had he left it here? Had he—

Focus, Elim.

His error didn’t occur to him until he was halfway back up the stairs. The door swept open in the moonlight. The screech of the insects
 Damnit, you might as well have handed him the keys to skimmer and drawn him a map to the shuttleport. But, to his relief, the only move the doctor had made was to prop Loral’s back slightly with a tablecloth. He sat beside her talking in low, gentle tones. The boy
hadn’t taken it. As easy an out as he was like to have, and he’d stayed. Perhaps he’d believed that bit about the theta-band detonator after all
 Inside he quaked with a terrible mix of adrenaline and gratitude and fear, but the hand that extended the medkit to the doctor was as steady as ever. He looked at it with detached admiration. “Thank you, Doctor.” The human didn’t respond, lost in the medical scanner. A probe’s mistake, Elim. He could hear Tain’s voice, sharp with disgust. Sentiment has dulled your wits. Trying to stay out of the doctor’s way, he sat and took the old woman’s hand. Now’s not the time, Father. The medical scanner beeped worryingly. One didn’t have to be a doctor to recognize the urgency of the alarm. Loral’s eyes lolled in fear. Make yourself useful, for the love of State. You may not be able to handle her heart as the doctor can, but you can handle it in your own way
 He forced a light expression. “Loral, if you wanted a day off, all you had to do was ask.”  A tug in her cheeks. Good. “You’re not to die until you’ve finished preparing the cakes for Union Day
 and, you know, thinking on it, I haven’t the first clue how to steam those K’r’rausian silk tunics. Imagine! Me on Union Day without my silk tunics, Loral! A true tragedy.” The dry exhale of what might have been a chuckle. “No, I’m afraid you’re going to have to stick around a bit longer, my dear.” For the briefest of seconds, he felt Bashir glance up from the scanner. Their eyes met and something stirred. Deep, from a place he barely recognized. He hoped the doctor saw the same respect reflected back at him.

Excerpt from AlphaCygni's Garashir AU fic "Proof"

Illustration by me, @bleuuughhh-blog

Have this thing!

I find myself doubting my ability to choose an excerpt of the appropriate size and type to best represent this story and the scene I drew for it; not so long that it impedes on AC's delicately built intrigue, nor so short that it's impossible to get one's footing in the text. I doubt my ability to represent this scene well enough not just in my excerpt but also in my artwork: I doubt if it's detailed enough, well enough composed, *legible* enough.

What I don't doubt, however, is the stunning quality of the story from which this scene comes, nor the extent to which I will endorse it and sing its praises. Hats off to you @alphacygni and your phenomenal fic from years ago lol. It's irreparably changed my brain chemistry and my standard for both romances and tragedies alike. I hope you don't mind the continuous art posts and tags because I definitely have more scenes to create and share!

Anyone feel free to ask me for Garashir scribbles BTW. I do art for a living and doing dumb lil doodles helps me relax and sometimes get out of artist's block. Still exploring and learning in this absolutely wonderful fandom 💕

Click the first image to see the hairs on Bashir's lil head better


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1 month ago

Garak in his Pussy Galore outfit saying he's "not too sure about the collar."

Julian. Are you aware how low of a cut he's willing to go for you? Do you know what kind of plunging necklines he would put on for you? You could put him in an outfit that would make any other Cardassian pass out or throw up. You could see his titty spoon if you wanted. You could see his cleavage and you're putting him in a turtleneck? You are interfering with his ability to slut it up, and he wants to slut it up for you.

1 month ago

Julian is moping about turning 30 in a universe where humans regularly live to 150.

You vain little twink.


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4 weeks ago

anyone remember what these things are called like little cartoony expressive doohickies i think they have a real name but i can’t remember

Anyone Remember What These Things Are Called Like Little Cartoony Expressive Doohickies I Think They

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1 month ago

I didn’t know I couldn’t reblog posts with a video lol so i have to do the context again, but heres a video of my dog Pearl who passed 3 days ago. She loved to watch ds9 with me and got SO stressed when she thought I didn’t realise it was on? Here she is Pleading to be allowed on my lap, because the possibility of missing out on quark made her experience levels of anxiety that could only be recreated in a lab

1 month ago

Sorry I acted romantic and delusional again, you can kill me if you want

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bleuuughhh-blog - Blegggggghhhh- Blog
Blegggggghhhh- Blog

I'm a nerd and I draw and right now I'm so hyperfixated on Star Trek I made a Tumblr, an ao3, and a Pinterest for it. ao3: CharcoalSavvy

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