Me, Myself, And I

Imagine John asking Clark to do a tik tok dance video with him but then Kon sends it to Tim who who shows it to Damian and Bruce and says they have to one up them.

Which because they’re competitive assholes they absolutely do. Bruce would hire dancers, rent out some very fancy venue, and get full lights and maybe even pyro.

Then somehow Clark gets stuck writing a puff piece at work about “billionaire Bruce Wayne and son go viral with elaborate tik tok dance trend” and Bruce has not stopped looking smug for days.

bat-shenanigans

they’re the hero’s gothem deserves…?? maybe??

spending his bounteous inheritance

Original photo credit: Pygmy Falcon chick at the San Antonio Zoo

Baby Dick Grayson ? Pls pls pls

i humbly offer:

(everyone draws zitka-plush so tiny... i need it to be huge and overwhelming)

what happens if Batman is out driving the Batmobile and he gets pulled over & asked for his license

Zatanna projecting her period cramps onto Constantine

I’m reading Batman: Failsafe and I’m having FEELINGS

Dick: I just think, maybe, you're wrong.

Duke: Wow Richard, invalidating a young black man during Black History Month!

Dick, confused: Its April

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tim takes the last two cookies for him and Bernard.

Duke, who already had one but wanted one for school: Woooow Timothy, taking from a young black man during Black History Month!!

Tim: Its September!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jason accidently hits Duke a little too hard during a sparing match

Duke, who is completely fine the next second but is in that mood: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW—

Jason: Its fucking November and you're fine!!

Duke, ready to double down: WOW JASON PETER TODD, BEATING DOWN AND THEN INVALIDATING THE EXPERIANCE OF A YOUNG BLACK MAN DURING BLACK HISTORY MONTH!!

Press, holding a microphone too close to Tim’s face at a gala: how are you settling in at the Wayne’s now you’re officially adopted?

Tim, with a confused face: What do you mean? I’m not adopted.

Press: ..What? No, you were adopted-

Tim: Bruce gave birth to me.

Bruce, behind Tim, nodding: Obviously.

bfs (i live in fantasy land where they stop arguing long enough to kiss)