"paperback Writer" Is A Song About A Guy Who Wants To Be A Paperback Writer Who Is Writing A Fictional

Okay, starting to side with McLennon-ers slightly because what is this

OH JOHNNYYY 🥰🥰

Ok, here it is. We've had the 'insane things Paul has said about John' list, now here's 'insane things John has said about Paul'*

*Note: Some of these are ‘John said to me’ quotes rather than words from John himself, so take these ones with a grain of salt.

And because so much of John’s Paul-induced insanity reflected in his actions, some (dis)honourable mentions…

Cutting up a girl's clothes and calling her a whore for sleeping with Paul (from the Beatles Anthology book)

Being mean to Jane when Paul first meets her

Defending Paul after the LSD controversy time and time again

Writing 'I'm always perfect' on a photo of Paul and 'funeral' on a photo of Paul & Linda's wedding

Getting upset about Too Many People and writing How Do You Sleep in response

Mocking the Ram photo with a pig

Using the 'Let Me Roll It' riff in Beef Jerky

Having a fight with Yoko and immediately running off to Paris

Other icebergs…

Insane things Paul has said about John

McLennon - by @frodolives

Paul McCartney - by @frodolives

Sources, full quotes and some others that wouldn't fit under the cut!

"If I can't have a fight with my best friend, I don't know who I can have a fight with" - The Mike Douglas Show, 1972

"Things are still the same between us. He was and still is my closest friend, except for Yoko" - 1971 interview

"He said to me, 'Artie, you worked with your Paul recently … I'm getting calls … that my Paul wants to work with me and I'm thinking about it … How did it go when you worked with Paul?'" - Art Garfunkel anecdote (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

Mintz: There's one name that has not come up in our discussion [...] Paulie. John: Yes, we did! We got Paul in it. And I object to that 'Paulie' business - 1973 interview (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"If anybody said anything bad about Paul, John'd take a swing at you. He'd say, "You can't talk about Paul like that". Paul was his best buddy" - Alice Cooper anecdote

"I'm entitled to call Paul what I want to, and vice versa; it's in our family. But if somebody else calls him names I won't take it." - 1974 interview

"Paul was one of the most innovative bass players that ever played bass. And half the stuff that’s going on now is directly ripped off from his Beatle period." - 1980 interview

After a late lunch, Linda launched into a long paean to the joys of living in England. When she was finished, she turned to John and said, “Don’t you miss England?” “Frankly,” John replied, “I miss Paris.” - Loving John by May Pang (1983) (submitted by @big-barn-bed)

"The Boulevard Saint-Germainegreer shone in all its springbok glory as he stepped lightly on some French loafers toward the waiting arms of Comrade Amie" (and a lot more) - Skywriting by Word of Mouth

"My cheri my pau pau, do you remember when we were at a cafe on the left bank? You could not find your garter? Because it was on your little prod" - John's song demo (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I'm just like everybody else, Harry, I fell for Paul's looks." - Harry Nilsson anecdote (submitted by @thegirlwiththeaxe)

"He also looked like Elvis. I dug him." - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @lesbianjohnlennon)

As the limousine edged through the screaming fans outside the cinema, John said laconically, 'Push Paul out first, he's the prettiest.' - Victor Spinetti, Up Front: His Strictly Confidential Autobiography (2006) (submitted by @fishfingerpies)

I could even hear what they were saying off-mike; ‘Oh Paul, you’re so cute tonight.’ was met with the reply 'Sod off, Lennon.’ - Joan Baez anecdote (submitted by @rabiessnail )

'Are those jeans tight, Paul?' That was John. 'What do you mean tight?' 'I can see your suspender belt through 'em and your stockings. You've got ladders in them.' Victor Spinetti, Up Front: His Strictly Confidential Autobiography (2006)

John: It sounds a vaguely good idea but I wouldn’t have my wife or any of me friends wearing them. Paul: Well, you’ve had us wearing them. John: I know, Paulie, but you’re so well-built - 1964 interview

Ringo: And I Love Her, yeah I love that one …and the way you sing it knocks me out, man. John: And the way that camera goes over your head… I thought, 'hello' - 1964 interview

"Meeting Paul was just like two people meeting.  Not falling in love or anything.  Just us.  It went on.  It worked." - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @i-am-the-oyster, @thewalrusespublicist)

"Hey! Did you dream about me last night? …Very strong dream. We both dreamt about it. It was amazing! Different dreams, you know, but I thought you must’ve been there…. I was touching you" - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @adriennefrombrooklyn)

"We do need each other alot. When we used to get together after a month off, we used to be embarrassed about touching each other. We’d do an elaborate handshake just to hide the embarrassment… or we did mad dances. Then we got to hugging each other. Now we do the Buddhist bit… arms around. It’s just saying hello, that’s all." - - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968)

Houghton: How do you feel about Paul McCartney now? John: Uh, we’re – haha. [laughs] This is like a joke: “We’re just good friends.” We’re – we’re pretty close now, like I was telling you before. - 1974 interview

"Nobody ever said anything about Paul having a spell over me, when I was with him for a long time. Or me having a spell over Paul. They didn’t think that was abnormal, two guys together. […] Why didn’t anybody ever say, “How come those guys don’t split up? I mean, what’s going on backstage? I mean, what is that Paul and John business? Why – you know, how can they be together so long?” - 1980 interview

"When I’m up against the wall, Paul, you’ll find I do my best" - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @iiiiiiits-m)

"The plus is that your best friend, also, can hold you without… I mean, I’m not a homosexual, or we could have had a homosexual relationship and maybe that would have satisfied it, with working with other male artists." - 1972 interview (submitted by @big-barn-bed)

“When we sang together, Paul and I would share the same microphone. I’d be close enough to kiss him […] So we’d be playing these concerts, in front of thousands of people, but the only thing I could see was Paul’s face. He was always there next to me – I could always feel his presence. It’s what I remember most about those concerts.” - Elliot Mintz, 'We All Shine On: John, Yoko & Me' (2024)

Paul: There’s a story. There’s another one – ‘Don’t Let Me Down’. “Oh darling, I’ll never let you down.” Like we’re doing— John: Yeah. It’s like you and me are lovers. Paul: [reserved] Yeah. [pause] John: We’ll just have to camp it up for those two. Paul: Yeah. Well, I’ll be wearing my skirt for the show, anyway. - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @alienoriana)

"The early stuff – the Hard Day’s Night period, I call it – the early period, was the early equi– se– what I’m – what I’m equating it to is the sexual equivalent of the beginning of a relationship, of people in love. And the Sgt. Pepper-Abbey Road period was the period of maturity in the relationship. And maybe had we gone on together, maybe something more interesting would have come out of it." - 1980 interview (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I mean, there were quite a few women he’d obviously had that I never knew about. God knows when he was doing it, but he must have been doing it" - 1972 interview

“It’s just handy to fuck your best friend. That’s what it is. And once I resolved the fact that it was a woman as well, it’s all right. We go through the trauma of life and death every day so it’s not so much of a worry about what sex we are anymore. I’m living with an artist who’s inspiring me to work." - 1971 interview (note: I know the 'best friend' here is Yoko, but the implications, baby...)

"He rang up and said he’d got this job and couldn’t come to the group. So I told him on the phone, “Either come or you’re out.” So he had to make a decision between me and his dad then, and in the end he chose me. But it was a long trip." - 1971 interview

"This song was written by an old estranged fiancé of mine called Paul" - Introducing 'I Saw Her Standing There' at Madison Square Garden, 1974 (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"The person I actually picked as my partner, who I’d recognised had talent, and I could get on with, was Paul" - 1980 interview (submitted by @crepesuzette2023)

"It would not have been the same. It would have been a different thing. But maybe it wouldn’t either. Maybe it was a marriage that had to end. Some marriages don’t get through that – that phase. It’s hard to speculate about what would have been." - 1980 interview (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I was living with Paul then, so I wrote with him. It’s whoever you’re living with. He writes with Linda. He’s living with her. It’s just natural" - 1971 interview

"It's like when the lawyers come into the divorce, you know? And that makes it a whole different ball game, you know… 'speak to my lawyer'" - 1973 interview

"It was never a legal deal between Paul and I. It was a deal we made when we were fifteen or sixteen, when we decided to write together, that we’d put both our names on ’em, you know." - 1980 interview

"And “go out and get her,” you know, and forget everything else. So subconsciously I take it that he was saying, “Go ahead.” On a conscious level, he didn’t want me to go ahead. So subconsciously, he… The angel in him was saying, “Bless you.” The devil in him didn’t like it at all. Because he didn’t want to lose his partner." - John talking about Hey Jude, 1980 interview

"When I slagged off the Beatle thing in the papers, it was like divorce pangs, and me being me it was blast this and fuck that" - 1974 interview

"And it’s really lawyers that make… divorces nasty. You know, if there was a nice ceremony like getting married, for divorce, then it would be much better. Even divorce of business partners. Because it wouldn’t be so nasty." - 1971 interview

"It’s like asking a divorced couple, “What day was it that – that decided you to – that the marriage wasn’t going well?” I didn’t – there was no date." - 1976 interview

"I’ve compared it to a marriage a million times, and I hope it’s… understandable for people that aren’t married, or any relationship. It was a long relationship." - 1976 interview

"I’ve only selected to work with – for more than a one night stand, say with an odd thing with [David] Bowie, or an odd thing with Elton [John], or anybody who was hanging around – two people. Paul McCartney, and Yoko Ono. Okay?" - 1980 interview

"I seen through junkies, I been through it all, I seen religion from Jesus to Paul" - 'I Found Out' lyrics, 1970 (submitted by @johns-prince)

“I’m glad that’s over. I feel like I’ve been keeping a vigil for him. Not that I care, you understand.” - John, according to John Green, Dakota Days (1983)

"One girl very shyly gave George a button badge which said ‘George for PM.’ ‘Why would Paul McCartney want you?’ said John to George.” - Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

John: "I was trying to put it 'round that I was gay, you know-- I thought that would throw them off… dancing at all the gay clubs in Los Angeles, flirting with the boys… but it never got off the ground." Q: "I think I've only heard that lately about Paul." John: "Oh, I've had him, he's no good." - 1975 interview (submitted by @johns-prince)

And I had a little upstairs, an unusable upstairs, and I kept a radio up there. Very faint. All of a sudden John said, "Is that Paul?" I thought it was somebody he knew named Paul. I didn't see anybody walk by. I said, "No." On the radio, Paul McCartney. We never mentioned anything about The Beatles. This little, low sound you could barely hear, he picked it right up. So, it just made me aware of how much attuned he was with The Beatles after they broke up.. - Gary Tracy, John's optometrist

John: "I've always thought there was this underlying thing in Paul's 'Get Back.' When we were in the studio recording it, every time he sang the line 'Get back to where you once belonged,' he'd look at Yoko." - 1980 interview (submitted by @johns-prince)

But in mid-January 1973 Lennon and Ono quarrelled publicly at another party. “I wish I was back with Paul,” Lennon reportedly said. - Peter Doggett, You Never Give Me Your Money: The Battle for the Soul of The Beatles. (2009) (submitted by @notgrungybitchin)

'From time to time John would say to me ''I wonder what Paul is thinking about, right now.'' I said John, I've only met him a couple of times in my life you know … I have no idea. And John would ask ''Do you think he thinks about me at all?''' - Elliot Mintz (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist )

“He was always saying, ‘I wonder what Paul is doing.’ When John and I were together, and this is about a week or two before our relationship ended, I remember him saying, ‘Do you think I should write with Paul again?’ I said, ‘Absolutely. You should because you want to. The two of you as solo performers are good, but together you can’t be beaten.” - May Pang

“Yeah, I miss Paul a lot. It’s been a year since I’ve seen him. He came over with Linda to me place in New York. Course I’d love to see him again. He’s an old friend, isn’t he?” - 1974 interview

"I never thought we’d come to that, because I didn’t think we were that stupid. But we were naïve enough to let people come between us." - 1971 interview

‘Paul? My dear one’ - 1980 interview (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"I’ve read cracks about, “Oh, the Beatles sang ‘All You Need Is Love’, but it didn’t work for them,” but nothing will ever break the love we have for each other." - 1972 interview

'"I just saw a girl who said she saw John Lennon walking down the street in New York wearing a button that said, "I love Paul." She asked him: "Why are you wearing an 'I love Paul' button?", and he said: "Because I love Paul." - Harry Nilsson anecdote (submitted by @bluewater9)

I've been feeling bad since my friend pushed me into this fandom. I hope they're happy in another universe

Even though John is under-powered in this period we still see what made him so magnetic to Paul and to others around him. There is a scene early in Part Two that I find riveting. It takes place a couple of days after George has left. The status of everything - the project, the band - remains uncertain, but they are ploughing on for now. John, Yoko, Ringo, Paul and some of the crew are sitting in a semi-circle. Paul looks pensive. Ringo looks tired. John is speaking only in deadpan comic riffs, to which Paul responds now and again. Peter Sellers comes in and sits down, looks ill-at-ease, and leaves having barely said a word, unable to penetrate the Beatle bubble. At some point they’re joined by Lindsay-Hogg, and the conversation dribbles on. John mentions that he had to leave an interview that morning in order to throw up (he and Yoko had taken heroin the night before). Paul, looking into space rather than addressing anyone in particular, attempts to turn the conversation towards what they’re meant to be doing:

Paul: See, what we need is a serious program of work. Not an endless rambling among the canyons of your mind.

John: Take me on that trip upon that golden ship of shores… We’re all together, boy.

Paul: To wander aimlessly is very unswinging. Unhip.

John: And when I touch you, I feel happy inside. I can’t hide, I can’t hide. [pause] Ask me why, I’ll say I love you.

Paul: What we need is a schedule.

John: A garden schedule.

I mean first of all, who is writing this incredible dialogue? Samuel Beckett?

Let’s break it down a little. The first thing to note is that John and Paul are talking to each other without talking to each other. This is partly because they’re aware of the cameras and also because they’re just not sure how to communicate with each other at the moment. John’s contributions are oblique, gnomic, riddling, comprised only of songs and jokes, like the Fool in King Lear. Take me on that trip upon that golden ship of shores sounds like a Lennonised version of a line from Dylan’s Tambourine Man (“take me on a trip upon your magic swirling ship”). “We’re altogether, boy”? I have no idea. Does Paul? I think John expects Paul to understand him because he has such faith in what they used to call their “heightened awareness”, a dreamlike, automatic connection to each other’s minds. But right now, Paul is not much in the mood for it. His speech is more direct, though he too adopts a quasi-poetic mode (“canyons of your mind” is borrowed from a song by the Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band) and he can’t bring himself to make eye contact. “To wander aimlessly is very unswinging,” he says (another great line, I will pin it above my writing desk). Then John does something amazing: he starts talking in Beatle, dropping in lyrics from the early years of the band, I Want To Hold Your Hand and Ask Me Why. (To appreciate John’s response to Paul’s mention of a schedule, American readers may need reminding that English people pronounce it “shed - dule”.)

What’s going on throughout this exchange? Maybe Lennon is just filling dead air, or playing to the gallery, but I think he is (also) attempting to communicate to Paul in their shared code - something like he loves him, he loves The Beatles, they’re still in this together. Of course, we can’t know. I can’t hide, John says, hiding behind his wordplay.

— Ian Leslie, "The Banality of Genius: Notes on Peter Jackson's Get Back" (January 26, 2022).

[I was curious to read more of Ian Leslie's approach to the Beatles in general and Lennon-McCartney in particular, since he's currently writing a book about John and Paul's relationship: “John and Paul: A Love Story in Songs". He's also the author of that New York Times opinion piece that came out today.]

January 13th, 1969 (Twickenham Film Studios, London): John contends with how the force of his partnership with Paul and his relationship with Yoko has negatively affected George and perhaps directly contributed to George’s walkout on the group three days prior. (Note: Follows shortly after this clip. My apologies for the vagueness; this is a very difficult excerpt to interpret, and I change my mind about it constantly, as the emotional nuances of what is being conveyed shift significantly depending on whom you presume John is speaking to (Paul or Yoko) about whom (Paul, George, or Yoko) and whom it is in reference to or is directed towards (Paul, George, or Yoko), word to word. I did initially try to indicate who’s who in brackets next to the relevant pronouns, but the transcript got dreadfully cluttered, and as I said, I have hardly nailed myself to a mast. Basically, this is a fannish Rorschach test and Your Mileage May Vary.)

JOHN: And it’s just that, you know. It’s only this year that you’ve suddenly realised, like who I am, or who he is, or anything like that. But the thing is—

PAUL: But I still haven’t realised that. What I’m – the process.

YOKO: [inaudible]

JOHN: Yeah yeah, but you realise that some – like you were saying, like George was some other part. But up till then, you’d had a – your thing that carried you forward. [pause; Yoko speaking?] I know, I’d adjusted before you. Alright, that would make me hipper than you, but I know that I’d adjusted to you before that – for selfish reasons, and for good reasons, not knowing what else to do, and for all these reasons. I’d adjusted to all these and allowed you [inaudible] – you know, if you wanted to let me— [inaudible] —very, very… whatever it is. But this year, you’ve seen, you’ve seen what you’ve been doing, and what everybody’s been doing, and not only did we feel guilty about it, the way we all feel guilty about our relationship to each other, because we could do more… 

YOKO: [inaudible]

JOHN: I know, the thing is that I’m – I can’t – I’m not putting any blame on you for only suddenly realising it, see, because it’s [inaudible] our game, you know; it might have been masochistic, but the goal was still the same, self-preservation. And I knew what I liked about that. I know where the – even if I didn’t know where I was at, you know, the table’s there, and… let him do what he wants, and George too, you know…

PAUL: I know. I know—

JOHN: And I have won.

PAUL: But this thing has been—

JOHN: But I think you—

PAUL: You have—

JOHN: I feel it’s you.

PAUL: Whatever it is, you have. Yeah, I know. Well, I’ve had [inaudible]—

JOHN: Because you – ’cause you’ve suddenly got it all, you see.

PAUL: Mm.

JOHN: I know that, because of the way I am, like when we were in Mendips, like I said, “Do you like me?” or whatever it is. I’ve always – uh, played that one.

PAUL: [laughs nervously] Yes.

JOHN: So.

PAUL: Uh, I’d been watching, I’d been watching. I’d been watching the picture.

YOKO: Go back to George. What are we going to do about George?

JOHN: Yeah, I’m – yeah, sure. But this year, suddenly, it’s all happened to you, and you sort of go – you’re taking the blame, suddenly, as if, uh… Oh, he’d say, “Oh yeah, you know [inaudible],” as if I’ve never known it. And then he thought, “Fucking hell. I know what he’s like. I know he used to kick people. I know how he connived with Len, Ivan. I know him, you know? Fuck him.” And then, oh, but, but right, I’ve done such things… all that. So you’ve taken the five years that [inaudible], you’ve taken the five years of trouble, this year. So half of me says, alright, you know I’ll do anything to save you, to help you. And the other half of me says, well serves him fucking right. I’ve chewed through fucking shit because of him for five years, and he’s only just realised what he was doing [to her?]. So, and that’s something – we’ve both known it, you know? [laughs] And it is incredible. [pause] PAUL: Yeah.

 Brian and Paul plays a game of cards during the Philippines leg of the Beatles’ final world tour, 3rd-5th July 1966. 

(Photos by Robert Whitaker/Getty Images)

we as a fandom really underexamine how often crushing loneliness is a recurring theme in paul’s songwriting

Beatles in Colour → George Harrison in ORANGE & YELLOW For @radgeorgie

Joan Baez performing I Never Will Marry, c. 1958

January 13th, 1969 (Twickenham Studios, London): As Paul encourages an unconfident Ringo to go ahead with his plans to record a solo LP, John hedgingly brings up his own apprehensions about following his instincts (especially when he’s not even sure what he really wants to do). In their inimitable and emotionally non-committal fashion, John and Paul engage in metaphors about intentions, conveying these intentions in actions, and how these actions may be conveyed by those who see it. (Basically: what John and Paul talk about when they talk about love.)

PAUL: [to Ringo] The great thing is that you singing like how you really sing – will be it. It will be! 

RINGO: Yes, but the only way is to do it on your own. 

PAUL: Until then – yeah, sure. Until then – until you reach how you really sing, you’ll sing your half-soul. 

RINGO: Yeah. 

PAUL: And it’s probably when we’re all very old, that we’ll all sing together. 

RINGO: Yeah.

PAUL: And we’ll all really sing, and we’ll all show each other how good we are, and in fact we’ll die, then, I don’t know. [Linda laughs; diffident] Probably, you know, probably something sappy or soft like that… I don’t know, but really, I mean, i– it’s really down to all those sort of simple, silly things to me. 

YOKO: But those are the important things, you know. 

PAUL: It’s got to be simple. It’s got to be simple. It can’t be A plus B equals X plus Y plus Z, because that’s them, you know. And it couldn’t be— 

JOHN: [quiet] Maybe that’s what’s evading me. 

PAUL: Yes. [sincere] But it’s okay, that, you know. 

JOHN: [hesitating] I just, uh… because I’m not really sure what or how I feel about it. 

PAUL: No, but you’re—

JOHN: Because any time— 

PAUL: You’re unsure because you’re not sure whether to go left or right on an issue. You’ve noticed the two ways open to us. You know the way we all want to go. And you know the way you want to go. Which is positive! ‘Cause you want to go – now, okay. So your positive thing might actually be to kick that telephone box in. It might occasionally be to do that. So you know that’s the way you’ve gotta go.  

YOKO: Everybody would want to see that, actually.

PAUL: But you don’t want to actually look like you’re kicking the telephone box in. So you have to sort of say to everyone, “Look at that over there, everyone!” And while they’re not looking, you’ll kick the telephone box in, and sort of— [whistles innocently] 

JOHN: I don’t think that’s a fair representation. [laughs] 

PAUL: [conceding] Oh, well, it involves me, that’s me. I do that, too. And I think we all do that. But I think the answer is, that – while you’ve got us all looking at nothing over there, and you’ve thrown us for a minute, we would actually all have dug to see you kick that telephone box in.  Because we wanna see you do it. 

YOKO: But we’d have to say it too, though. That’s another thing. 

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