Cassidyrose53 - You Got Any Of Them Taquitos?

This is literally the last month you can reblog this joke

Would going on estrogen effect broad shoulders? I have really broad, fairly masculine shoulders and they make me really dysphoric.

Chrissi says:Unfortunately not my sweetpea…

Oestrogen does not alter your skeletal structure, unless taken pre puberty, and even then, if you have broad shoulders then it wont help you. I’m sorry lovely, there's a lot oestrogen can do, but it can’t do that… :(However, if they make you dysphoric, there are some things you can do to help with that.Here’s a Chrissi special top tips list peeps! ;

1. Emphasise your waist while balancing out your figure.

Think peplum, it cinches your waist but the flaring on the bottom balances out your shoulders. Also, omgosh pretty.

2. Avoid tops with detailing at the shoulders, or balance them out with volume on your lower half.

If you have a beautiful top with detail on the shoulder, pair it with a flowy skirt that balances out your shoulders and lower body.

3. Embrace the skater skirt, she’s your friend.

Skater skirts flare out to balance your lower body with your upper body, so even with a detailed top, proportions are balanced.

4. Yay to scoop and v-necks.

Wearing lower cut tops keeps the attention away from your shoulders, leading the eye down instead of from left to right.

5. Avoid structured shoulders and pads.

Shopping for the perfect blazer or jacket? Try finding one without structure or padding, or remove the pads for a sleeker look. If your favourite blazer or jacket is padded but awesome, pair with a flowy skirt or patterned pants to balance your lower half out.

6. Sport a long necklace.

Like v-neck tees, long necklaces bring the eye naturally downward.

7. Pair a dark top with light bottoms, creating the illusion of a narrower upper-half.

This doesn’t have to mean sticking to black on top and white on bottom, as long as the top is darker than the bottoms, your figure will appear more balanced.

8. When choosing tank tops and halter necks, the thicker the strap, the better.

The more material between the neck and shoulder, the smaller your shoulders will seem.

9. Know the types of tops that will accentuate the broadness of your shoulders.

Strapless and off-the-shoulder tops lead the eye to the shoulders, sometimes making them seem even wider than they naturally are. Avoid the extra attention by pairing one of these tops with a bottom that adds volume, or go for a full-bodied dress. Because sexy sexy sexy.

10. Make sure the seam lines on your shirts and jackets actually fall on the edge of your shoulder.

The seam lines on your shirts and jackets are made to fall on the edge of your shoulder, so if they’re anywhere closer in toward your neck, it will make your shoulders appear further extended.

11. Go for a diagonal cut sleeve, rather than horizontal.

Horizontal sleeves will add weight to your shoulders, while a diagonally cut sleeve will soften the area.

12. Choose jackets and cardigans that elongate your figure.

Cropped jackets look boxy, which can make your upper body look wide and short, accentuating your shoulders.

13. Sign yourself up for a drawer full of dolman sleeves.

A dolman top’s sleeve has a dropped seam and usually a wide top and narrow wrist opening. Due to the natural slouchiness of this garment and the dropped seam line, shoulders appear slouched downward, not outward.

14. Puffy sleeves, though cute as hell, will definitely draw eyes to your shoulders.

The puffiness extends the shoulder line and adds bulk to the top, so balance the perfect puffy-sleeved top with a patterned pair of bottoms or perhaps a skirt of a lighter colour than the top.

15. Invest in a kimono top.

The extra material in a kimono sleeve flares out past your shoulders to minimize them.

16. Choose dresses and tops with an empire line.

Empire lines cinch under the bust line, thus drawing attention to the smaller part of your torso rather than your shoulders. Dresses that are full and flared will give additional volume to your lower half, drawing the eye downward.

17. When sporting a collar or lapel, go for something thin and narrow.

For shirts and jackets: go collarless whenever possible to minimize attention to that area.For blazers: a narrow lapel will bring the attention down and in, whereas a wide lapel brings attention outward.

18. Trick an observer’s eye downward with detailed bottoms.

Embellished skirts or patterned pants paired with a plain top will bring the attention down low instead of up top. Ruffles, pleats, beading, lace, and patterns all fit the bill on this one.

19. If you’re going to wear skinny jeans, pair them with a plain top.

While glorious for boots weather, skinny jeans taper your lower body, making your top half look more voluminous. Pair with a v-neck tee or a top like the one above that draws attention downward and you’ll be good.

But honestly, do what works for you, girl.

Own it. Work it. Love it.

Followers, feel free to add on!

it’s fun to stay at the Y

GUYS READ ALL OF THIS PLEASE PLEASE PL--

If you’re feeling like there is no hope, know that there are people who can help. Our friends at Crisis Text Line offer free support by text, 24/7. #WorldSuicidePreventionDay

Voice Training for Trans Girls | Stef Sanjati

(Just thought I’d share this in case someone finds it useful!)

https://www.shopmissa.com/

they sell like a bunch of makeup for $1. there are also makeup tools. other items are more than $1, but still

here’s info about their shipping & handling policies & pricing: https://www.shopmissa.com/pages/shipping-handling

Review of the book Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes by Cody O’Brien.

To sum up this book in a single sentence - “What would happen is Deadpool wrote a mythology book.”

Yeah, this guy-

Wrote a book. Here are some examples of why I think this.

GREEK MYTHOLOGY 

The Greek creation myth.

The story of Hephaestus god of Blacksmithing and Aphrodite Goddess of Love.

The story of the Minotaur. 

NORSE MYTHOLOGY

Norse creation myth.

Odin orders Loki to steal Freyja’s necklace. He does. This is so in character for both of them Freyja instantly knows who to blame.  

EGYPTIAN MYTHOLOGY

Ra gets mad at humanity and creates Sekhmet Lion Goddess of Killing Stuff. 

How Isis retrieves her huband’s coffin from the support pillar it got stuck inside.

MAYAN MYTHOLOGY

How to try and kill the god Zipacna and fail. 

CHRISTIANITY MYTHOLOGY

How God made Eve from Adam’s rib. 

The story of how King Solomon judges proper maternal instinct. 

HINDU MYTHOLOGY

Men ask Shiva to stop Kali’s murder rampage.

And this is how he does it. 

JAPANESE MYTHOLOGY

The Goddess Izanami gives birth to the whole island of Japan. 

A story about Tanuki.

AFRICAN MYTHOLOGY

Creation myth

SUMERIAN MYTHOLOGY

Creation myth

The Epic of Gilgamesh: Being born

The Epic of Gilgamesh: Meeting his best friend.

NATIVE AMERICAN MYTHOLOGY

Do I really need to explain why I feel the Merc with a mouth was involved in the retelling here?

The Most Basic Of Basic Makeup Tutorials

Easy Makeup Tips That Literally Anyone Can Follow

By

Brit + Co, Contributor

Brit + Co connects you with innovative ideas, apps, and products that add creativity and simplicity to your everyday life.02/08/2016 05:15pm EST | Updated December 7, 2017

This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site.

Don’t get us wrong: We love a show-stopping makeup look as much as the next girl. But makeup basics are important. They’re what help you with your base makeup routine that gets you ready in just five minutes flat every. single. day. and the hacks that can take you from office to date in just a few simple steps. We spend a lot of time breaking beauty down to the essentials, but here, we’re going even further into 101 territory: we’re talking a what’s what of your makeup kit. Whether you’ve glossed over the nitty gritty of each product or are just learning how to build a routine that fits your personality or schedule, consider this your guide to keeping makeup simple and approachable. This foundation of knowledge can also be your stepping stone into the more advanced, creative ways to use makeup. Here’s everything you need to know about makeup basics and how to use them.

Foundation + Concealer

Foundation: Beyond your skincare routine, foundation is what makes your skin appear flawless; it evens out your skin tone and conceals any subtle blemishes or discolorations on your face. The most important aspect of foundation to consider is coverage. Generally speaking, there are two ways to go. If you want lighter coverage then opt for a tinted moisturizer, a slightly colored cream that you can swipe on with your fingers to give your skin a wash of color. This is the lazy girl’s M.O. If you’re interested in more coverage then liquid foundation – the classic form of foundation – is your best bet. This foundation is best applied with either your fingers, a flat synthetic foundation brush or a sponge blender.

Take it to the next level with concealer: When you really want to be sleuthy, add concealer to your routine. It’s your go-to for things like covering blemishes and more apparent skin discolorations, and can also be used to brighten and even out your under eye area. Concealer comes in different mediums like creams, sticks and liquids. Similarly to foundation, you’ll pick your product based on the level of coverage you need for your skin type.

Bronzer + Highlighter

Bronzer: Imagine bronzer as sunshine in powder form. When you apply foundation to your skin you even out your skin tone, but you’re also getting rid of the natural shadows and highlights on your face. Think of the bronzer as your way to use shadow to create depth or to give the illusion of moving a part of your face back. This is the first step to adding warmth and dimension back into your face. The “right” bronzer for your skin tone should look like a naturally tan version of you, not too orange and not too dark.

For extra illumination use highlighter: Highlighter is essentially the opposite of your bronzer. Rather than making a part of your face look smaller, you will use the brightness of a highlighter to bring out areas of your face (When you see images of a gal who has that glowing dewy-looking skin, there is a very good chance that she is wearing highlighter. Secrets revealed!). You can get highlighters that are golden, pearlescent and opalescent. There are also other variations, such as matte highlighter, which gives you the brightness without the shimmer. Finding a highlighter that works well on your skin tone and for your personality is pretty simple.

Blush + Cream Blush

Blush: When you’re not wearing any makeup, you’ll be able to see a natural flush of color on your cheeks. But again, after applying a little foundation, you’re covering that up in attempt to get a more even base to work with. Enter blush, the product that adds life to your features (um yeah, you can wear blush on more parts of your face than just your cheeks). Because blush comes in so many hues, you can take it literally and match your natural flush or use a more playful hue to make your look more vibrant. Typically, beginners will wear powder blush because it’s usually easier to apply for a more natural finish.

Pump it up with cream blush: Cream blush is a really fun way to take wearing blush to another level – it’s more pigmented, and therefore a bolder way to wear blush. To take it even further, you can apply a cream blush as your base and set it in place with a powder blush for an even brighter punch of color that will last all day.

Eyeshadow + Smokey Eye

Eyeshadow: When it’s used on its own as a single shade, eyeshadow is purely cosmetic. As a minimalist or beginner, you can apply a sweep of a single shadow across your eyelid for a subtle pop of color.

Get your blend on with a smokey eye: For a more advanced gal who wants to take eyeshadow to the next level there’s the smokey eye. The concept here is to create dimension using a base shade, highlight shade and contour shade just like you would do on your face, but focusing on your eyelids only. You can use endless color combinations as long as you keep the basic approach the same. To build a dramatic look, use a neutral color on your eyelids, a deeper medium hue in your creases and a brighter shadow on your brow bones and the inside corners of your eyes.

Eyeliner + Brow Pencil

Eyeliner: Eyeliner is all about enhancing the shape and color of your eyes. There are several techniques you can use, but beginners should keep application simple by using a pencil along their lower lash line to create definition and along the upper lash line to make eyelashes look fuller. Simple as that.

For further definition use a brow pencil: The idea of filling in your eyebrows can be a little intimidating for the gal who has never gone there, but once you’re ready to accentuate your eyes further, this is the way to go. Eyebrow enhancement can actually change the entire look of your face – this is why we’re considering it a more advanced makeup route. You can try powders, creams and other variations of mediums, but the easiest way to fill in and shape your eyebrows tends to be an eyebrow pencil that you can get in a hue to complement the natural color of your eyebrows.

Mascara + Eyelash Curler

Mascara: This was actually my gateway to makeup; I wore mascara before anything else. Mascara is a great way to give your entire face a little extra pop without having to learn all the other techniques. I recommend that you pick a mascara that’s not waterproof to start because it will be much easier to take off later. The formulas are typically designed to enhance length or volume and the biggest actual difference is usually the shape of the brush. Try to find a mascara that has a smaller application brush so you can have more control when putting it on.

Turn up the volume with an eyelash curler: This device looks scary as heck (I always make sure to be gentle with this little contraption), but it’s totally clutch when it comes to getting va-va-voom lashes. It’s a must for certain looks, but you have to make sure you use it correctly or else you can – eek! – break or rip out your eyelashes. Be sure to watch a tutorial that offers tips and tricks as to how to use it properlly before you get on this train!

Lip Color + Lip Liner

Lip Color: We’re not just talking color – the choices are endless – but we’re also talking types of lip color. There’s lip balm, gloss, tints, creme sticks and stains. The main difference you should be aware of is that each one carries a different level of pigment, aka the amount of color that will show up on your pout; this can vary from brand to brand. The easiest intro to lip color is to start off with the less pigmented options and work your way up to the bolder hues that take more effort to apply and maintain.

For an even more perfect pucker use lip liner: While lip liner is a next-level product, it’s one that I highly recommend using whenever you choose to wear any type of lipstick or darker pigmented lip color. Lip liners essentially create a barrier to keep the lipstick on your lips and prevent the color from bleeding or feathering onto the perimeter of your mouth. In other words, it’s the secret to totally kissable lips.

For more beauty + DIY tutorials, check out brit.co!

dealing with the worst case scenario

your condom breaks

you feel a lump on your breast

your friends are ignoring you

you’re stranded on an island 

you got rejected by a crush

you get into a car accident

you got stung by a bee/wasp

you got fired from your job

you’re in an earthquake

your tattoo gets infected

your house is on fire

you’re lost in the woods

you get arrested abroad

you get robbed

your partner cheated on you

you’re on a ship that’s sinking

you fall into ice

you’re stuck in an elevator

you hit a deer with your car

you have food poisoning

your pet passed away

you fall off of a horse

you or your friend has alcohol poisoning

you have toxic shock syndrome

your house has a gas leak