I'll just say it now remember how Martyn hit Jimmy at the start and then gave him a heart & kiss? if he dies first i swear to god he kissed off the canary curse off of Jimmy
OP turned off reblogs
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
Certain words can change your brain forever and ever so you do have to be very careful about it.
we need to destroy the idea that girls should wear makeup. normalize bare faces on prom queens and flower girls and cheerleaders. no products at all instead of '7 product simple makeup routine.' no more 10 step skincare and regular facials and dermablading and gua sha just to be comfortable with yr natural face. i want to see eye bags on the funny librarian and acne on the swim coach and wrinkles on all our adult role models. i want to see a 16 year old girl that has never tried putting on eyeshadow. i want to see a 7 year old girl who doesn't have to go out and buy powder for her dance recital. i want to see trans women and girls everywhere to never have to wear makeup, regardless of how well they 'pass.' no more 'contouring to look masc' either. a post-beauty industry world is possible
+ if it wasnt clear this post is explicitly trans inclusive :]
Okay, so he’s got a girly face, and he wears tights and some high boots. Sure.
But check out that noble steed. That’s one ready-to-kick-ass-and-take-names steed.
While other princesses just run away and leave nothing, Philip gets AN INVITE TO HER HOUSE. He gets a song, a dance, and a first date.
He comes home, just to tell his dad he’s not going to marry the princess because he’s in love.
No. Other. Reason. He rides in and is just like, “I met the girl I’m going to marry. Now I’ve got a birthday party to be at. Bye Dad.”
Now how much do you think his dad weighs? That short fat little man? Probably pretty heavy.Not a problem for Prince Philip.
And then he gets jumped by goblins, both hands tied behind his back
But that’s not enough to stop Prince Philip.Oh no.
He breaks his hands free and starts chucking goblins.
Look at that face. That face. The “BITCH JUST YOU WAIT” face. He may be tied down by a dozen goblins but he’s not gonna take no shit from this witch.
In fact, he’s so strong, she ends up keeping him chained to the wall, but he still fights back.
Now when he finally does get free–
He’s ready to go into battle UNARMED. He don’t need no shield or sword, he’s going to go punch Maleficent’s face in with his fist. If Flora didn’t stop him, he probably would have, too.
Backed up against a cliff edge, nowhere to go. Fighting off goblins. But there’s so many and just one Philip.
NBD I’LL JUST JUMP AND SLIDE DOWN THE ROCK PILE IN MY SKIN-TIGHT TIGHTS.
Gate closing?
who gives a fuck? certainly not prince philip.
Lighting hitting rocks around me?
NBD BRO
Giant forest of thorns?
Bitch, get out of my way. I’ve got a princess to save.
Giant dragon of hell?
CHARGE HEAD ON.
Fire? Dragon? Burning dry twigs? No. Fucking. Problem.
Just smack that bitch on the nose.
Sheer cliff face? Fire burning behind me? Back to a wall?
Calm down guys, I got this.
I’LL JUST FUCKING SCALE IT ONE-HANDED.
And fight the bloody beast from 500 feet high, with literally nothing to save me if I fall.
Lose the shield off the cliff?
JUST STAND THERE AND SMILE ‘CAUSE I’VE GOT A FUCKING MAGIC SWORD THAT’S GOING THROUGH YOUR HEART BITCH.
Just chuck it. Straight through.
Then jump out of the way…
And survive. That’s what happens to bitches who mess with the woman I love.
Get the horse.
Get the girl.
EXPLAIN NOTHING.
that’s how he EARNED his happily ever after.
Srsly. The most bad. ass. prince. disney ever wrote.
WHO IS USING THIS
AN APP??? THEY HAVE A FUNCTIONING WEBSITE
THE LAST FUNCTIONING WEBSITE
it's hilarious how if you do any amount of research into life or death melee combat the prevailing themes that emerge are that
you're gonna get tired very quickly
tired leads to injured, injured leads to tired, tired leads to—
you're not gonna be as composed as you expect
humans are more fragile than you think and also more durable than you think. both are true and neither stop them from dying of an infection later (DO NOT GET BITTEN)
DO NOT GET STABBED (generally good life advice)
DO GET A SPEAR
knights are faster than you think
"how dare you say we piss on the poor" is honestly like. a god tier post of all time. beyond a world heritage post. it is on par with like, the old testament. to me
I find it funny whenever I get complimented for my “serious face” in photos because I think I just look like I’m bored or plotting a murder.
Lower One's Eyes
Thumbnail by @vesperionnox my partner in desertduo crime!! Go check it out its my first animatic ever help KJEKAJSKLSJ <3
I do art. Mostly of block people, but sometimes OCs or other fandoms. It’s a fun little surprise.
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