realistically, Steve's magnetic arm band thing from AoU that brought his shield back to him could never malfunction ever. Because it's Stark tech.
But imagine if it did one day because he tripped on the stairs and all 200 pounds of patriotic muscle landed squarely on it. so it just started yanking every thing even vaguely attracted to magnets right out of its place. imagine.
----
Steve: *reaches for his shield mid mission*
Clint:
Steve:
Clint:
Steve:
Steve: what-
Clint, firmly attached to Steve's arm by his belt: YOU TELL ME
----
Steve: *stretches*
Tony, holding onto the refrigerator for dear life as it barrells down the stairs and right into Steve's face: *SCREECHING*
----
Steve, final-showdowning: five
Villain of the week: do I absolutely have to wait for your shield or can I go-
Steve: FOUR
Villain:
Steve: three
Steve: twO
Villain: I have to pick my daughter from ballet man
Steve: ONE
Steve: BOOM
Villain:
Villain: is that a paperclip-
Steve, crying: shut up
----
Steve: oh my god. Oh my god I'm so sorry I didn't mean to do that I promise oh my fucking god-
Natasha: okay you need to fix that thing
Steve: I PROMISE I WILL
Natasha: aight
Steve: ...
Steve, trying his best to dispel the mortifying awkwardness: so do you always keep an iron knife in your bra or-
Natasha: please stop talking
Reblog for sample size or perish
Steve, about Bucky: Can I tell him he looks nice? Sam: Sure. Steve: Can I tell him I respect him? Natasha: Yes, I think he'd like that. Steve: Should I show him an oil painting I made of us surrounded by our three cats and four dogs? Natasha: … Sam: I’d save that for later.
Playlist for when your Boyfriend stops breathing - by @sunsetplums
This fic had a chokehold on me for days now.
It's beautifully written but it also hurts so much
they would so do that xd
He's just a little goofball
Commission Info / Kofi (members get comics a week early)
(PS I'm 90% sure that I got this from a fanfic, but I read so many that I don't know which one, so if someone happens to know can you tag it? lol)
To be fair, it's not like they are wrong xd
bucky in fic: steve u asshole u could’ve been killed! what were u thinking? let me bandage u up and get u a nice cup of tea, i love u so much
actual bucky:
Let’s remember that Bucky Barnes without Steve Rogers was the kid who befriended a small sickly boy looked down on and picked on by everyone else without caring what anyone thought.
Bucky Barnes without Steve Rogers was a smart, bright, likable young man who enjoyed going to dance halls and science fairs.
Bucky Barnes without Steve Rogers earned the respect, friendship, and loyalty of his soldiers to such an extent that when a stranger in spangly tights saves their lives only to ask them to follow him back into the fray, they agree because this guy’s nuts but he’s got Sarge’s seal of approval.
Bucky Barnes without Steve Rogers withstood years of unimaginable physical and psychological torture until his captors were finally forced to strip him of his memories and all sense of self in order to make him compliant, and even then had to phrase his missions as fights for the good of the world.
And then, Bucky Barnes, with no knowledge of Steve Rogers or himself, with no agency or moral compass, couldn’t be kept out of cryostasis for too long lest he regain the smallest sense of self and turn on his masters. Because even they knew that James Buchanan Barnes was the furthest thing from a bully, and feared the vengeance he would bring down on them if he realized what they were forcing him to do.
And this is just Bucky Barnes in the MCU, who’s had maybe a half hour of screen time and a handful of lines.
Yeah, the seeds of the Winter Soldier are in Bucky, insomuch as he is competent, loyal, fierce, a brilliant tactician, capable of doing the dirty work to save others the burden, and a bit ruthless when it comes to protecting innocents and those he loves. But isn’t it telling that even stripped of everything but these attributes and then turned to destruction and chaos he becomes, not a bully, but an asset of terrifying efficiency? The Winter Soldier is single-minded and brutal in carrying out his missions, but he is an effective soldier, not a bully.
James Buchanan Barnes is a hero, and nothing, not the absence of one man (even a man like Steve Rogers) or anything else, could change that.