One Of My Favorite Headcanons I Have, Is That Most Superheroes Fight In A Very Uniform Fashion. They

One of my favorite headcanons I have, is that most superheroes fight in a very uniform fashion. They have training, and they’ve been doing this for a while, so most of them fight like someone who knows what they’re doing and understands body language. Peter Parker however.

He never got training. He got bitten by a spider, watched his uncle die in front of him, and then said “fuck it, we ball” and sewed a spider logo on a red hoodie to go combat gang violence. He has NO CLUE how to fight, so naturally, he fights like he just escaped from an asylum.

Where most hero’s would be pinned against a wall, he just starts kicking their shins. Where most hero’s would have a hand over there mouth, he has a hand in biting distance. Where most hero’s have an opening to sweep the leg, Peter has an opening to kick them in the groin so hard they fall to the ground sobbing.

The first time Iron-man, or any hero for that matter, sees him fight, they genuinely think he doesn’t think the fight is hard and is experimenting because he’s using none of the right tactics, and some things that aren’t even tactics. And then they say “hey, what style of fighting was that? I’ve never seen it before.” And he just stares at them like “that was a style called I’m a child soldier who doesn’t know what the hell is going on at any given moment and biting works”