Batmans "No Metas In Gotham" Rule But All Of His Kids (the Batboys In Particular) Are Secretly Metas.

Batmans "No Metas In Gotham" rule but all of his kids (the batboys in particular) are secretly Metas. A silly AU

Obviously, Dick has weird contortionist stuff going on. He's an acrobat gymnastic, he can twist any part of his body into a pretzel. But that doesn't explain him being able to squeeze into a vent system that even rats struggle to get through. When Bruce finds an 11 year old boy crying through the vents "daaaad I got stuck" he did not expect to find that Dick managed to squeeze himself through 20 feet of 6 inch wide 3 inch tall ductwork into a small pocket meant for a fan. Bruce was left questioning for months if Dick somehow popped a joint to do it, but nope... Dick just straight up has squishy bones. It's an at will thing, so no one's ever noticed it before. Bruce only finds out when Dick yells "think squishy thoughts!" to try and help Bruce free himself from a Joker death trap, and when questioned, is like, "Yeah.. my mom taught me to."

Jason gets mild elemental control. Nothing insane or super noticeable, but he manages to stay completely dry even during rainy patrol nights, fires seem to naturally pull towards him when he walks past them, lights flicker if he gets too emotional, ect. Bruce only found out Jason could do any of this stuff after Jason died and came back. It was raining hard that night. Bruce found his should be dead son. But Jason was dry as a bone. Half of Gotham was missing power, the street lights flickering madly every time the fight moved further down the street. The explosive Jason planted in the helmet seemed to be an all-consuming everlasting flare that was hell-bent burning Bruce.

Tim has night vision. It's not the most impressive or cool or weird, but it's so very helpful. The way Bruce figures it out is he finds Tim in the pitch black batcave, writing away in a notebook while reading some old case files from pre modern batcomputer era where Bruce had written down everything himself. He was attempting to solve cold cases in the dark. At first, Bruce is like "well maybe his eyes adjusted," but no. I (Seth) have been caving/spelunking irl before, it's really fun, but it's So. Fucking. Dark. It's literally impossible to see at all, even when your eyes slightly adjust. He starts to freak out the rest of the batfam by wandering the manor at night without any lights. Sick Tim, standing over Bruce's bed in the pitch black going "I threw up" in the most pained voice ever and Bruce nearly shits himself.

Damian is all sorts of fucked up and weird and I'm not saying the Lazarus Pit was involved, but why else does Damian have an utterly insane healing factor? It's basically impossible to cut him cuz it's like his flesh instantly heals. At first Bruce is convinced that Damian was just taught really well for an 8 year old kid, dodging so many hits, until he realized that actually Damian was incredibly sloppy, he just never worried about getting hit cuz he healed so fast. One time, his hand got chopped off and Bruce was about to have a mental breakdown cuz "Oh god I failed my son." And Damian just holds up his already reforming hand like "father, chill the fuck out."

More Posts from Cometmoons and Others

2 years ago

Over thinking: part one

Technically speaking, if human start out as an egg, we hatch inside of a mother and then be birth. Humans could technically be reptiles and we would never know, like a scale less one-

(THIS IS A JOKE-)


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10 months ago
cometmoons - Comet Moon
1 month ago

I gift to thee,

~✨Doodles✨~

I Gift To Thee,

I’m getting better at drawing people! :D


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5 months ago

Congratulations!!

Once in a while I think about how much more fun it would have been if Percy Jackson had been made into an animated series instead. Not only because things could be closer to how the fandom envisioned, but also because of the ability for cartoon silliness to more closely be able to capture the kind of humor the books so often had. Not to mention the fact that a lot of neurodivergent people, which the books are aimed at, can pay better attention to cartoons because expressions are easier to read and different characters are easier to keep track of.

But also a big reason I think an animated series would be way funnier is the fact that if it were me making PJO into an animated series, I would make Percy kind of self aware like he was in the books, talking to the reader and breaking the fourth wall like Pinkie Pie every once in a while. (He's the only one who can do this)

Idk I just love Percy breaking the fourth wall especially since I read the books when I was younger and made somewhat of an emotional connection to him so if he talked to me it would be like hey!! I know you!! We're friends going on this adventure together

Does anyone else see my idea or is that just me lol


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9 months ago

Oh fish of marble,

what do you have to say?

You shine like pearls

Lost in the deep.

And there’s secrets

You long to keep

Like why are you

surrounded by the deceased?

Or stuck in place once more?

How do you light up the room

Where you stay under the false water roof once more?

Marble fish,

Oh how I wish you could answer

But you’re as still as the star next to you.

(Here’s said marble fish)

Oh Fish Of Marble,

(He’s under a glass table, btw, for context)


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1 month ago
My Guilty Dog Every One.

My guilty dog every one.

His name is boss and he rolled in iguana  poop today-


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3 months ago
Happy Thursday The 20th

happy Thursday the 20th

3 months ago

One should always have at least 2 craft projects going. That way, when one of them is messed up and misbehaving, you can switch to another, and let the first one sit there and think about what it's done.

1 month ago

"i'm tired of seeing-" use your filters.

"but there was an icky ship-!" use your filters.

"i don't like that tag-" use your filters.

don't like what you're seeing? use. your. filters.

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cometmoons - Comet Moon
Comet Moon

I shit post a lot.He/they..(Also a minor, don’t be weird about it please)

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