Shonen Authors Writing A Hetero Romance: They Bicker... But... They KISS?!?!?! Revolutionary.

ao3 is crazy because you'll read the most gut-wrenching 200k word slowburn that leaves you sobbing into your sweater at four in the morning and the author will be applejacksmonstercock

This is a scary monster appreciation post. I think people focus too much on him with the cracked face, just the tail, or full dinosaur. LOOK AT THIS THING! It encapsulates what Scary Monster is. Look at his weird hair. His nose-less face. The way it blurs the line between human and monster. Like gdvuawilfwsdfgyui i have no words for this. Scary Monster is definitely one of my favorite stands. <3

I went on a date today and she found out I made the bike comic

I was out this this cute girl and I think we were really hitting it off, then she asked what kind of comics I make. I told her, and then as she looked at them on her phone, recognition came over her face.

Her: "oh...OH MY GOD... ARE YOU THE BIKE CUCK GUY???"

Me: "Y-yeah..."

Her: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"

Her: "WAIT, HOLD ON, I GOTTA SHOW MY FRIENDS THIS."

She asked the people at the table behind us if she could borrow one of their phones for a second to pull up something on the browser. Then she held their phone somewhat in front of hers and took a photo of me along with it.

I never asked for the photo so here is my approximate recreation of what I think it looked like:

She was busy texting seemingly all of her friends as we finished our meals and stood up, when I decided to pipe up again.

Me: "Um, y-you know wh-what would make the happiness in the world increase..."

She looked up from her phone with a sly smile.

Her: "What?"

Me: "I-if...if we k-- um, kissed..."

Her amused smile slowly descended into an absolutely indiscernible neutral expression.

then, after a pause

it rose again into a smile

Her: "You... are so cute. Close your eyes. I have a surprise for you."

I closed my eyes tight, and gently puckered my lips, bracing for a kiss.

Then she slapped my ass so hard that there is still a palm print on it.

I got a one week break from uni and I feel so FUCKING REFRESHED. I FUCKING NEEDED THIS.

So anyways I actually had free time that I didn't just spend on sleeping!

So yeah!!

Currently still being Ghiaccio pilled for some reason yay

And why did no one tell me uni was so fucking tiring like god fucking damn

Chapter2: The Last Sermon

The Last Sermon (Part One)

I just accidentally made un-tea?????

I made green tea, but I forgot there was an old bag of chai in the kettle, so I mixed chai water with decaf green tea, then I mixed in like a half table spoon or something of that honey from the dollar store that they aren't legally allowed to call honey because there's too much corn syrup in it and some almond milk and a single drop of coffee creamer because we ran out and???? It tastes like??? Nothing????

It has LESS flavor than my tap water! HOW do you EVEN-

I think I made a flavor that's only perceptible to shrimp, that's the only explanation

*tucks everyone in bed, makes sure everybody is warm enough*

Pinned

gimmick blog for cataloging posts (videos, images, texts, whatever) that have altered your vocabulary in some way. adding a word or phrase, obliterating the tumblr linguistic biosphere, etc. you can nominate posts by tagging if you want to. i'm also gonna reblog posts of my own volition. this will result in some bias because my vocabulary is strange to begin with. i'm formatting it like you're picking something up to add to your inventory in a video game because funny.

whether or not i reblog a tagged post is up to my discretion. if it's one i haven't seen before but that i can easily picture Changing Something, it gets added. specific fandom references probably won't make the cut unless they're truly groundbreaking (such as miku binder thomas jefferson).

#outside nomination - someone else sent this in

#personal nomination - this one is all me

more info below the cut

other tags include #phrases, #words, and #characters. phrases and words are probably self-explanatory but for characters it's for when a person or other entity is made up and tumblr latches onto them/it for fun, such as cousin throckmorton or goncharov.

#bonus hit is for posts that permanently changed the way people talk on this side or stuff that is still being referenced years later. #combo hit is for if the entire post (multiple words/phrases/whatever) is insane enough to be referenced or thought about for years. if the entire post is one sentence or sentences that are unrelated to each other it doesn't get the combo hit tag because that is, by definition, not a combo.

main blog is nickel-alloy so youll occasionally see me reblogging posts from there if the source of the linguistic injection cannot be reblogged from for one reason or another. if i reblog from you it's likely that yours was the most recent clean reblog i could find without doing too much scrubbing.

yes i have autism. pronouns are he/they or something

HIT LISTS OF POSTS THAT ARE GOING ON THIS BLOG (as soon as i find them again):

stabby the roomba (long-standing character)

cinnamon roll too good for this world, too pure (biosphere alteration)

the friendful visitor (arguable biosphere alteration)

death is coming. Death is coming. pass me a hot dog (i personally think about it from time to time)

los feratu (funny)

hear it hurgling (funny)

the grink (funny and true)

vanilla extract (arguable biosphere alteration)

eeby deeby (arguable biosphere alteration)

horse plinko (arguable biosphere alteration)

bidoof's law (biosphere alteration)

okay <3 yay <3 (arguable biosphere alteration)