Sexy Lawyers

saw Wicked on Broadway for the first time this weekend and can I just say No Good Deed is so so so matt coded.

"no good deed goes unpunished" oh you mean like how he told juan the truth about inpax and her creepy abusive ways to try and save him from that relationship and then years later they're both blamed for her death?? yeah??? yeah.

so this ended up being my dark urge wild magic sorcerer for bg3 that I made based on Matt. Didn't feel like downloading any mods to make it super accurate to how he looks in the OG game but like. He's pretty so idc. Yes Juan is his guardian. Bc I'm gay and stupid and so are they

so ive been playing a lot of baldur's gate 3 recently and after i finish my current playthrough im gonna do a dark urge run but have my tav be Matt Motherfucking Engarde. and I do actually have strong opinions about his class.

wild magic sorcerer . ! because he's definitely a charisma based class and I like to think about how his life might have been affected by the chaos that only wild magic can induce. And I've thought about maybe warlock before but I think it's very important for Matt to be like. The source of his own power, y'know? In line with his acting talent being the thing that got him where he was, like, he was a Child and he was working his ass off, it was not the result of some deity/being of some kind like "hey want some power??"

~~more under the cut~~

Maybe there's something with his backstory like . Something really terrible happens, maybe due to a wild magic effect (scar related? possibly? like that's how he gets his eye scar??) and he swears off using magic for a while but misses the feeling of being able to do great things and in this period of confusion is when he gets approached by some devil (he would be pact of the fiend, fight me) of some kind like "I heard you've been wanting power again?" and that's the kick in the ass that Matt needs to have this resurgence of faith in himself and his natural ability.

He's a performer/entertainer but I don't think he's bard coded y'know? Especially in fantasy land. And Paladin is the only other charisma class and um. No . That's just not him. I could see him maybe taking a few levels in rogue for sneak attack and cunning action type stuff but at his heart he's a magic user, it's intrinsically tied to who he is.

I also think he's either a human or a half-elf (high elf, sun flavor).

(un)happy anniversary of matt engarde going to jail

a daisho request on twitter !

don’t you know ignorance is bliss?

OKAY TIME FOR MY BIG ANNOUNCEMENT

so yknow that dentist radio edit ive mentioned? well, ive only found 3 digital recordings of it. one of them is crunchy, one isnt pitched correctly, and one is only the instrumental. for some odd reason, no one has made a clear digital recording of the actual song. and, well, i own 3 different record copies of this version...

BEHOLD!!!!!! a direct digital recording of the dentist radio edit, using my new fancy turntable and audacity!!! it still has some record crackling, but this is miles clearer than anything ive been able to find online!! and its in stereo, so theres some fun speaker-to-speaker action as well, which i didnt even know this version had!!!!! so cool!!!

this version of the song incredibly interesting, they added a lot of stuff to it. the song opens with thr sound of orin's motorcycle, theres a more prominent bassline (which i think sounds better), theres a whole new lyric that's unique to this version only, and the biggest change is the audio from the arthur denton scene interrupting the song, and then merging with it. bill murray is moaning throughout the last chorus and its great. im fairly confident that this version was for radio promotion, especially with the inclusion of the bill murray stuff. but i cant really find like, any info on it or its multiple record copies. man!

anyway. i hope this recording helps get people interested in this version of the song! i will work on getting a program to help clean up the record crackling, but thats for another day. please check it out, and thank you for reading!!!

PS: if you wanna download the MP3 file for yourself, send me a dm and i'll give you the link to download it! im having trouble sharing the link on posts, it only seems to work when i send it directly to people? who knows. sorry!

Fuyuhiko only lets people he trusts stay in his blind spot, and if he trusts someone, well he likes them a whole lot! 🤗

really enjoy that engarde asks to call his lawyer while talking to phoenix and that when he does and phoenix’s phone rings he picks it up and says ‘hello?’ as if he’s expecting someone else and then they just continue the conversation over the phone while looking at each other. especially enjoy that he does this bit twice and that phoenix goes along with it both times. obviously indicative of something deeply wrong with engarde but arguably even more of something wrong with phoenix