Your shoulders are littered
With meaningless tatoos
Inky reminders
That cannot be removed
So here is new mistake
For you to wear around
And maybe it will mean something
When i am nowhere to be found
A No.2 pencil and a dream can take you anywhere.
Joyce Meyer
So I'm colorblind, and when I was starting at a new school everybody was super freaked when they found out. People always point at things and ask what color it is... is this just me? Like this,
People: Ooh! You’re colorblind? What color is the sky?
Me: Blue.
People: What color is this paper?
Me: White.
People: You aren’t colorblind, why would you lie?
Me: I’m not lying, I am colorblind. I’m just not colorstupid.
But then there are sometimes...
People: Ok, what color is this peanut butter?
Me: ...
Me: Green..?
Never in my life before
Have i felt this unfulfilling ache
Which rises with the rosy sun
But never seems to set
At twilight
You defy all meaning
All logic
All truth
You are like a blizzard
In the desert
Or an earthquake
In the sky
Impossible,
Yet happening
Right before my eyes
There are so many eyes
Glowing in the dark
Watching me
Waiting until i slip.
It is maddening
The disembodied cackles
Mocking me
Not with words,
But with laughter.
Awaiting my failure
Do you see the eyes?
Do you hear the sounds?
Am i the only one
Who is
Going insane?
I inhale lemon.
A sweet breath
That ushers in my sleep,
So then i waver
Into a state
Filled with nothing
Except the scent
Of tangerine dreams.
If we are all as dead
As we claim to be
Then are we merely
Skeletal actors
Playing the role of a man
And stiffly mimicking
The beating of a heart?
Of all the insults you've thrown
"Soft" has hurt the most.
To hear that the years of love and laughter
That carved the lines in my cheeks
Were a weakness
Wounds me as much as the slaps you endured
At the hands of people far less soft than I.
In a moment my pain will pass, I know
And pity will set in
At how sad it is that you were raised
To see compassion as a flaw.
-
Day 3/14
Love is like being lost, then finding yourself at your destination anyway. Love is like forgetting the formula on a math test, but still getting the the answer right. Love is life forgetting your wallet and finding the exact change you need on the ground.
Love is an innocent mistake, that ends up better than you could ever have hoped.