Yeah Man I Guess I Do Idk

one of the things i love about half life is gordon is a mostly blank slate character and you can really only get a sense of him from inference. but the fact that gordon is kleiner's special little guy speaks volumes. just look at kleiner and you'll be able to learn a lot about how gordon must have been before the world went to shit.

“i can fix him” “i can make him worse” well you know what?? i can project onto him

Out of Touch

Love is really dope when you find your person.

love is a drug and babygirl, im a faggot

Since I already made this a tag, I might as well develop the thought: William is a self-fulfilling prophecy personified. He wholeheartedly believes that no one would ever respect or need him in any way despite his desperate want for attention and splendor.

He wants people to give him attention and care for him, only to push them away and cry about how lonely he is; he alienates himself from Elizabeth, shoves her off, and so, despite still caring for him in a way, she grows resentful of him (just like she does with Henry).

I am 100% sure he was doing that with Henry, too. Henry must have loved him to some extent. If not romantically, then as a close friend, family perhaps. Yes - Henry was distant, constantly drifting away with his thoughts - fixated. If William cared to get closer, he would surely be able to.

But William wasn't trying to get any closer; he was in his little bubble of obsession and spite, always just a bit out of reach, wallowing in misery that he hid from everyone else.

Henry was his only close friend, but in the end, it was like they barely knew each other (They were both oh so lonely).

Instead of taking the first step, William grows jealous, craving Henry's attention and convincing himself he will never get it. He starts blaming it on Henry's children: Charlotte especially, 'daddy's little girl.'

In Charlie's memories, William looks like he is considering which one to take, her or her brother. I don't think that's the case - I think he's always intended to take her. It was just a matter of figuring out which was which: they were twins, and it was dark in the storage.

He knew what would hurt the most. Henry didn't seem to care about Sammy nearly as much as he did for his little girl. He started drowning himself in grief while William was considering some things.

What a power trip that was!

What a center of attention he's become, even though people weren't aware he was the culprit.

What a thrill.

Not only had it made him feel powerful (feared), but it had also given him a splendid opportunity to become Henry's shoulder to cry into. It had also fully convinced him of what he'd always thought: no one would ever love him. He was a terrifying and imposing figure.

Maybe he'd felt justified in his crime; maybe the fun that came with it was secondary.

He wanted to be hated, feared, to wake disgust. It was better than remaining unseen, even if it was his fault.

It's like he wants to get mistreated to have justification, of sorts, the satisfaction of being correct. He takes pleasure from people being scared of him, disgusted with him, and hating him. Whenever someone shows any sign of care or concern, he lashes out.

Did he beg Henry to mistreat him? Not with words, but his behavior? Did he confess so he could see the betrayal, the hatred? Disgust? Was he drinking it off his eyes? Did he want Henry to turn that hatred into violence?

When Henry made his last decision, was he disappointed? Was he satisfied?

Lonely, again?

He is constantly setting himself up for failure.

Digital Stars feat. MIKU & GUMI

Gordon and Alyx kissing dumb sloppy style? that true? i certainly hope not

oh it’s true buddy. pal.