abusive dad, approaching at random: WHY DIDN’T YOU GET THIS THING DONE ALREADY?!
me: what? you didn’t tell me to do it
abusive dad: DOES EVERYTHING NEED TO BE DRAWN OUT FOR YOU?? YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TO BE TOLD!! HOW OLD ARE YOU?? CAN’T YOU DO ONE SIMPLE THING??
me: so you can’t even be expected to tell me when you want me to get something done? i’m supposed to read your mind?
abusive dad: YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO KNOW!!! WHY DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU EVERYTHING?!!
me, internally: wtf even is this. was this just an excuse to scream at me. ah. thats what it was.
So… I got a notification from the State Department at like 8 PM Pacific that my passport was approved, and I was quietly thankful and stunned bc my legal gender in Oregon is listed as X, or undeclared, and that's what's on my passport. I'm pretty sure someone(s) worked late to get the X passports done today.
I was already really grateful to whoever in the Seattle Passport Office worked late to get these things processed on the last Friday before That Man gets back into office... and then I got a notification that my passport shipped at fucking midnight Pacific and whoever got that shit out the door so it couldn't be picked up on Monday and like, denied and shredded?
They're my fucking hero.
something that’s so frustrating to me is when people (usually able-bodied people lol) tell disabled people how sad/uncomfortable their very existence makes them.
“it makes me so sad to look at u” “just thinking about how hard everything must be for u makes me want to cry” “i cant imagine living like that”
like. that’s your fucking problem to deal with. don’t put your feelings on us like that. we are not a receptacle for your ableism and guilt.
disabled people are not doing anything wrong by just existing. we don’t need to be told how uncomfortable it is to see a person who looks different from most other people existing in public, or even in their own homes. it just feels so unnecessarily cruel, even if it isn’t “intended” to be. it’s not our job to process your feelings + it’s not our job to change for you. fuck off.
The deep ache in my chest when I hear that family members who claim to love me are traveling to visit my trafficker (mom).
The degree to which I wish she would just fucking die already.
Your best is what you can do without harming your mental and physical health, not what you can accomplish when you disregard it.
I remember my mother constantly threatening me with stories of horrible foster homes, always obsessed with making sure I believed anything would be worse than the abuse currently happening at home. She threatened to drop me off at the fire hall, or that if I called CPS myself, that's what would happen.
Here’s a reminder that if your parents/guardians were ones that threatened to “send you away” anytime you acted out or didn’t live up to their expectations, this was wrong and you deserved so much better. I know my parents used to threaten to send me to a school away from them because my grades suffered. It felt awful.
If you have trauma because of it, your trauma is valid. This sort of emotionally abusive tactic from parents/guardians can make a child feel that their love is conditional and can also make a child feel they can and deserve to be discarded if they do something wrong. I want you to know that you should never have been made to feel that way and that it’s okay to make mistakes. You deserved so much better than this.
And I didn’t talk to him ever again
33. she/her. disabled. did & cptsd. sex trafficking survivor. posts might be triggering.
232 posts