Latest Posts by doggosta - Page 4
I think about Ernest Frankenstein a lot because he's the one surviving member of the family and the sole heir to the Frankenstein estate. He also is the only one who can pass Frankenstein genes down so that movies like *Young Frankenstein* can exist.
He's also adorable in my opinion, because he was sick as a child, and now he's better and trying to find his way in the world. And he hates school and I just think that's sweet. But also his family is trying to decide for him what his career path should be, so that's a little sad.
My point being, Ernest is a little behind on his education. It doesn't seem like he has any of his own prospects, and as far we know his family is his only support system. He seems pretty vulnerable. And then his little brother dies while *he* was playing a game with him: seems like that might mess a person up. And then his family friend dies, ok. We don't know if he grieves, but let's go on.
His older sister, a critical member of his support system, goes and gets married. She's going to be out of the house at least. But then she gets hardcore murdered, and then Alphonse, their father, dies soon after that.
All Ernest has now is Victor, his adult brother. That is his only known family, his only support, his only safety net. And then Victor leaves his 16-year-old brother, behind developmentally, at home when he goes on his revenge spree. HE LEFT ERNEST ALONE, BY HIMSELF. Victor didn't for a moment consider his little brother, didn't even mention him when he went off to DIE in a foolish little revenge girls' trip that he wasn't going to win.
And I very well know that Victor was mentally ill. I understand that he was grieving and had actually been institutionalized. This isn't a Victor hatepost.
I'm just saying, the man abadoned his creation thoughtlessly, and we all know how that went. So now he abandons his little brother, the forgotten middle child, the only one who didn't die, to do god knows what with god knows what consequences.
And Victor talks about how he loves his family. He doesn't want to be separated from them. He doesn't want them dead. He grieves them. But Ernest is still alive. Ernest is still alive and I bet he grieves too. And he's your family and I sure he loves you and you both could support each other. Don't abandon him. He deserves better.
I've still got Frankenstein on the brain and one theme I keep on thinking about is the one of appearances and beauty. It feels like Shelley's novel takes a mirror to victorian beauty standards.
As I understand it, victorians believed beauty was tied to virtue and goodness and good breeding. Ugliness was believed to be a sign of wickedness and poverty. I think the best example of this is Elizabeth. Victor's parents notice she's prettier than the other poor children they see and turns out she's the only surviving member of a wealthy family and they adopt her. While its a kind action, they never help the other poor children, but the novel doesn't really criticise them for this.
The creature, due to his appearance is attacked and rejected by society, despite him being kind and intelligent. He becomes cruel, scheming, and violent because of his treatment by society at large. The only person who is kind to him is the old blind man who cannot see what he looks like. Like I feel there is at least this criticism of how people are shaped by their circumstances. That someone who is treated as a monster will become one, that the prejudices of victorian society are what lead to thr actions of the creature who has been brought into a world which as no sympathy for him.
Idk I just really like how the novel plays with ideas of moral complexity and how the way we are perceived affects the way we are treated.
Kristussy got me acting unwise
Could you link some of your threads discussing and analyzing Garou’s character as a whole or analyzing strong scenes that emphasize his character?
Many of them nowadays are either chapter-specific observations and commentaries, or anon-prompted meta discussions, but let's see if I can list some of the major/overarching ones I’ve written over the years (some might be pretty old too):
Why does Garou have no confidence?
The Shed Scene in-depth: on his semblance of choice and on whose version of ‘justice’ prevails + bonus anime commentary + bonus vs Darkshine callback
More in-depth thoughts about Wolf Boy - a binding mindset stemming from his childhood
To Stand and Be Strong - on his grueling personal mantra that compels him to keep fighting
The Will to Power - heavy theory centric; where Garou’s arc shows us the way (of what not to do)
Garou’s compassionate side & empathetic capacity as a telling mark of his humanity
The WCScene™ - on the ending mistranslation and Tareo’s importance
All his direct arc parallels he shares with other heroic characters, including The Dual Disciples’ Lament (with Genos) + bonus comedic irony with King
How gracefully he carries himself - aka Murata’s art appreciation
My personal favorite positive aspects and manga moments
Other specific character traits: he’s no coward, he’s a tsundere, he’s an introvert (bonus mbti analysis), he’s ‘pure of heart,’ he also likes misunderstood ‘cool’ animals
On more of the negatives/controversial traits:
Critiquing his character flaws
On ‘non-heroic’ behaviors that Garou doesn’t like - bonus: on Mumen, on Blue Fire, on Metal Bat
When he encounters real monsters he finds them disgusting
On his internalized self-worth issues dehumanizing himself
His habit to throw his opponents’ own words back at them
On whether he’s a ‘hypocrite’ vs his struggles in cognitive dissonance
On his common fanon + bad faith mischaracterizations (1, 2, 3)
His tv tropes and classification as an Anti-Hero (by ONE himself)
More Garou vs Saitama relevant food for thought discussions: their introspective identity parallels on learning what they lack, my warning on Saitama’s approach, their opposing light & dark symbolism, webcomic Garou’s post-arc speculation
For fun: commentary on Ova4 Games & Rivals (Garou vs Suiryu, set before their wc meeting), the manga’s character introduction pages reflecting Garou’s growing story prominence, and his photoset compilations (because why not~)
Hi!! My name is Kay, and I draw! My interests looks real random lmao I know the blog is a mess. I am much more active on twitter but quite awkward and unfamiliar there so please if you can go see me I am @doggosta tysm 🌷
Batarou from that band au on ao3 has been on my mind for days op so galaxy brained for that 😭😭😭
Also I am real new around here and much more active on twt so if you're also in this with me pls I am @cheetheweeeee on twitter lets suffer in Batarou super hell together
do you understand my vision.
I just look up Ambrosius and Ballister's swords since I am not the most well versed in weaponry and all, and guess what, even the swords has parallels going on too. I don't know if anyone pointed this one out but it is really interesting, not much foreshadow but fun anyway. Eh, spoilers warning if you haven't finished Nimona yet, go watch it pls its scrumptious.
Im gonna start with Ambrosius'. His sword is called an estoc, a stabby sword. Nice pointy tip right there, ready to skewer through amours right. And with Bal, we have a chonky, chop-chop broad sword with sharp sides and a triangular looking tip. Suitable to cut through, as opposed to the estoc. They are, once again, the polar opposite of eachother.
But it does not end there. In the course of the movie, these two swords were at least once used with completely opposite intention. The elegant estoc was used to disarm Bal, while the broad sword was used to stab through Nimona as Ambrosius! And the fact that it was used on both of them (well, supposedly)! My oh my this movie is incredible.
Finally played this game (watched as my neighbour did all the work while i chose between bonus doors)
This two are my favs, their vibes are good
Robert Walton: discovers a man in the most shit condition on earth. Like this man is literally looking so bad. Negative rizz.
Also Walton:
I can’t wait for Robbie’s next letter OwO
Ranking gothic lit characters by the things they do instead of sleeping
(Note: This post is a joke, and maintaining a healthy sleep schedule is important)
11. Dracula: Being the worst
10. Robert Walton: Writing down everything Victor Frankenstein says
9. The Phantom (Erik): Stalking people, causing problems, working on an opera (Unrealistic, people are not actually productive when they stay up)
8. Jack Seward: His work (lame cause he’s bad at it), ignoring his emotions (realistic)
7. Utterson: Tracking down Edward Hyde (exciting)
6. Dorian Gray: Staring at his portrait (relatable, but lame), sinning (cool)
5. Griffin: Experiencing the consequences of his actions (relatable)
4. Johnathan Harker: Worrying about the vampires that are trying to eat him (exciting)
3. Adam Frankenstein: Reading Paradise Lost (cool), setting fires (fun!), starving in the woods (tragic)
2. Dr. Jekyll: Violence (fun!), being Edward Hyde (funner!)
1. Victor Frankenstein: Playing god (cool), angsting (realistic)
autism be damned my boy can make an 8ft tall man in his college dorm
Homoeroticism I notised while reading Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein (spoiler warning):
“His full-toned voice swells in my ears; his lustrous eyes dwell on me with all their melancholy sweetness; I see his thin hand raised in animation, while the lineaments of his face are irradiated by the soul within.” (Robert Walton about Victor Frankenstein)
“He appeared about fifty years of age, but with an aspect expressive of the greatest benevolence; a few grey hairs covered his temples, but those at the back of his head were nearly black. His person was short, but remarkably erect; and his voice the sweetest I had ever heard.” (Victor Frankenstein about M. Waldman)
“His manners in private were even more mild and attractive than in public.” (Victor Frankenstein about Henry Clerval)
“Excellent friend! How sincerely did you love me, and endeavour to elevate my mind until it was on a level with your own! A selfish pursuit had cramped and narrowed me, until your gentleness and affection warmed and opened my senses . . . ” (Victor Frankenstein about Henry Clerval)
“His eyes sparkled as his cheek flushed with pleasure; and at that moment I thought him as beautiful as the stranger.” (Frankenstein’s creature about Felix De Lacey)
“Clerval desired the intercourse of the men of genius and talent who flourished at this time.” (Victor Frankenstein about Henry Clerval)
“His fine and lovely eyes . . . ” (Robert Walton about Victor Frankenstein)
“I have longed for a friend; I have sought one who would sympathise with and love me. Behold, on these desert seas I have found such a one . . . ” (Robert Walton about Victor Frankenstein)
“My unfortunate guest regards me with the tenderest compassion.” (Robert Walton about Victor Frankenstein)
“His eyes sparkled, and his cheeks flushed with momentary vigour.” (Robert Walton about Victor Frankenstein)
“Margaret, what comment can I make on the untimely extinction of this glorious spirit? What can I say that will enable you to understand the depth of my sorrow [at Frankenstein’s death]?” (Robert Walton about Victor Frankenstein)
Be careful for what you wish for
tw: blood
So... Uh... I did the thing
I drew the Usami, again
the past
(part 3 of a series of posts about tsukishima hajime. this is the last and longest one. see also parts 1 and 2.)
tsukishima's biggest hurdle in life is figuring out how to square away his troubled past while continuing to live. he feels like the only path he can follow is the one forged by tsurumi, a great man with big ideas who saved his life. he doesn't have any dreams or ambitions other than that because he doesn't value his own life at all. but it was tsurumi who made him that way in the first place.
when tsurumi asks tsukishima if he should have let igogusa know he was alive, tsukishima tells him that it's fine, but he only says that because he is on death row and has no reason to expect he will ever escape from it. he thinks that igogusa knowing he was a death row inmate would only shock and dismay her, so he would rather just die without her knowing the truth. (the line he says is, "iie… ima sara kanojo ni nanimo shiteageraremasen kara" "no… because there's nothing i can do for her at this point.") but that's based only on what he understands as his current situation at that time! if the order of things had been different, if tsukishima had first understood that he would be escaping with his life and living as a free man (albeit with a great debt to tsurumi), maybe his answer would have been very different! tsurumi intentionally timed his question so that tsukishima would give the wrong answer and then feel compelled to stand by it! tsurumi wants tsukishima to feel resigned to never seeing igogusa again, because then, he can focus solely on serving tsurumi's goals. now, because tsurumi made him say it was fine, changing his mind would be going back on his word and challenging the person who saved him from execution. he could not do it. his will was already mostly broken on that day.
isn't it a little cruel that we the readers have the dramatic irony of knowing that igogusa is alive and well when tsukishima never knows for sure in canon? apart from trusting that tsurumi told him the truth, that is. but tsurumi told him a mixed and tainted truth in the first place, and tsukishima realized that, so of course his trust is also tainted by painful doubt. he threw the hair away, but he hasn't forgotten her; he hits a low point and ends up asking inkarmat about her, and when he asks, he thinks of her face! for the first time in the story! it's such a meaningful reveal. and even if he later decides that doesn't want inkarmat's answer… does he really never want the answer? can he ever get closure? it's so sad… the line between "wanting to know" and "thinking you don't want to know" is painful to tread. i mean, on my part, i want him to let go of her so he can be with koito forever, joyful and unburdened... but maybe it would be finding out that she's fine without him that would really help him get closure and move on with his life… to then be with koito otonoshin forever… i mean, he and koito are canonically together forever either way, but i mean together in TRUE AND UNFETTERED ROMANTIC LOVE...! ahem.
in chapter 210, when tsukishima puts on his scariest face, he says, "あなたたちは救われたじゃないですか" "weren't you (plural) saved?" (polite form) (he keeps polite speech during his whole subsequent monologue, even though he gets a little emotional.) it took me a long time to understand this line, but maybe it's just dullness on my part. at first, i thought he was talking about koito and his father being "saved," but that's not right; the other party in the "you (plural)" must be ogata. then i was thinking that it was about ogata and koito not appreciating being "saved" by tsurumi, and tsukishima is upset that they're not just quietly cooperating like he does. like, "why can't you fools just go along with it? were you saved by him or not? if you were, just shut up and don't question it. like i do." but after thinking about it more, i've decided that he actually says it with a wry and pained irony: he was also "saved" by tsurumi and has mixed feelings about it, and that makes three. like, "you two were saved, weren't you? what, it doesn't feel that way? of course not... it's the same for me..." and that explains why he goes on to tell koito about how he himself was tricked. and the scary face is not that he's upset with koito or trying to scare him but rather a reflection of his own internal turmoil finally showing on his face for once.
the thing is, among ogata, tsukishima, usami, and koito, koito was the least "saved" out of all of them, because there was nothing for him to be "saved" from in the first place, and tsukishima knows that. koito was just kidnapped. by them. you could argue that he became closer with his father because of the incident, and that he was able to solve his problem of being shoehorned toward the navy despite being prone to seasickness, but that hardly amounts to "saving" from anything. koito was slated to live a bonbon life either way. so that's why tsukishima can't help but give his little sweet lies monologue to koito. because he knows that koito was wronged and not actually saved at all.
withering up
when tsukishima looks perfectly desolate after tsurumi revealed the depth of his farce with igogusa's fake bones (the moment tsukishima refers to as having "withered up completely" when explaining it to koito), i had a hard time discerning what he was feeling in that moment. he had just had his old wounds opened up, he got upset and punched and yelled at tsurumi, he tried to protect tsurumi from a shell, they both got grievously injured, and then tsurumi explained just how far he went for tsukishima's sake. so what exactly was it about that chain of events that made tsukishima wither up completely? i think i've realized that it was shame. what tsukishima felt in the withered-up panel was shame for having doubted tsurumi. it was deep self-disgust because he had lost control of himself enough to resort to violence, just like when he killed his father. not only that, but it was violence against the only person who valued him enough to save him! he hates himself in that moment. and that's exactly what tsurumi wanted, because the foil to miserable, self-hating tsukishima in that moment is tsurumi, his shining savior. everything about the interaction went exactly as tsurumi planned (apart from losing part of his skull).
as tsukishima explained to koito, it was only later that he slowly started to doubt tsurumi (after thinking about the logistics of meeting that sado resident in the field hospital); in that moment, he didn't doubt tsurumi whatsoever. he trusted him and respected him so deeply that that interaction is what led him to finally throw away igogusa's lock of hair after 9 years. tsurumi had finally broken him completely. the depth of his trust and respect for tsurumi was the depth of the shame and self-hatred that he felt, and that's how tsurumi was then able to pour in his affection and cement tsukishima as his most loyal pawn. he broke tsukishima's will and then touched him gently on the head. urgh! (gritting teeth! fists clenched!) a nicer person should touch tsukishima gently on the head…!
and then, when tsukishima slowly started to doubt what tsurumi told him, he didn't act on that doubt or tell anyone or do anything differently because he still didn't trust himself enough to feel like his feelings of doubt could actually be warranted. he just slowly let those feelings ferment, and it wasn't until koito confronted him about the kidnapping incident that he was able to actually bring those feelings to the surface and consult with someone about them. but even then, he did it in the habit of tsurumi's dirty work dog and finished his monologue by threatening to kill koito…
this whole character arc of being unable to decide whether to doubt himself or doubt tsurumi is extra painful because of the dramatic irony. he never gets closure about igogusa! he never knows for sure that she's alive, even though we, the readers, do! the question of whether tsurumi told the truth about her is integral to tsukishima's doubt or trust of tsurumi, and he never closes that door in canon.
the fact that igogusa is alive seems to indicate that what tsurumi did for tsukishima was real and that igogusa's parents really did orchestrate an island-wide lie about tsukishima's death so that they could marry her off to a rich family. when you first read the scene where tsurumi explains that to tsukishima, you must suspect that it is tsurumi's completely manufactured story to manipulate tsukishima, toeing the line of believability. but if tsurumi didn't lie and that's what really happened, then it's worth focusing on how that's a uniquely fucked up thing to happen to tsukishima. it's so sad and bizarre. and the pain tsukishima must have felt knowing that he killed his father not as revenge for igogusa's suicide but without any good reason at all, only as a consequence of losing his self-control because he failed to understand the ruse behind it all… he felt that hideous guilt at having lost his self-control, and then, 9 years later, tsurumi's charade provoked him and he lost his self-control AGAIN! and this time, it was tsurumi he punched! so when it became clear once again that tsurumi actually did help tsukishima and that igogusa was in fact alive, it was a new dose of the same hideous guilt, compounding it! and that's why tsukishima is so defeated. he loses ALL trust in his own judgment (at least for a period of time… of years) and bolsters only his self-control. he decides to not try to figure out things for himself anymore and instead surrender his free will to tsurumi, who is so kind to him and so clear and admirable, and as long as he holds onto his self-control while burying his own will, everything will work out… it's a win-win in his view! he knows he's being manipulated, but because he can't trust his own free will to guide him, he feels like being useful to tsurumi makes his life worthwhile! and of course tsurumi benefits from having created the perfect pawn! tsukishima turns off his free will and his heart, turns his self control to max, and follows instructions to a tee! that's why he's so good at dancing in the girl's group at the circus.
it took me a really long time to realize that the reason tsukishima had such an emotional reaction to the lighthouse parents not knowing the whereabouts of svetlana is that he can relate to it directly because he himself still doesn't know where igogusa is or whether she's alive (because he can't fully trust what tsurumi told him, even though we the readers know it's true). the pain of not even knowing whether someone important to you is alive or dead…
when tsukishima was chasing after tanigaki and inkarmat and koito came over and stopped him by saying it was an order from his superior officer… that was really brave and smart on koito's part. he understood that tsukishima is motivated by duty and commitment to tsurumi, but he couldn't have been 100% certain that tsukishima would obey his order and not kill him too. despite that, he was 100% confident in his authority to give that order, and tsukishima didn't expect that. tsukishima had been looking down on him to a degree (understandably), and that's why he was surprised that koito was willing to step up and use his authority like that despite being wounded and at a disadvantage. he called tsukishima's bluff (as a soldier, do you respect authority or not?), and tsukishima faltered. it was perfect because really nothing but an order from a superior officer (and fellow tsurumi loyalist) could have stopped him at that moment. (another note about that scene: i never noticed before but tsukishima is pointing a rifle at tanigaki and inkarmat, koito shows up, and tsukishima keeps his rifle pointing at those two while picking up a handgun with his other hand and pointing it at koito behind him. that's such a goofy maneuver!)
it seems very unlikely that tsukishima has talked in detail about his past ordeals to anyone but tsurumi (although i suspect others in the unit understand the general gist of things), and the two of them probably haven't talked about it since the battle of mukden. the reason is that tsurumi isn't actually interested in helping tsukishima heal, as that might diminish his capacity as a pawn. but koito would never think that way, and he would want to actually help tsukishima and make him happy. so i want to see koito and tsukishima talk to each other about his past and his pain so that tsukishima won't feel so alone in his internal struggles. i think i've become fixated on the idea of tsukishima achieving happiness… i just want it for him so bad… i need to go on ao3 or something. (i've only read 1 golden kamuy fanfic so far.)
