Drrobctnik

he felt like he were disappointing sonic. he could tell that sonic were trying for his sake. hell only knew why, but sonic was. and that meant more to julius than he could properly admit, or even begin to process and parse through. he inhaled a touch through slightly clenched teeth, a hand coming up to rub at the side of his own face. "i.... think that would be for the best. i cannot stand these crowds. and the smell isn't something i'm fond of either."

at that, sonic coughed a little laugh, grinning up at julius, "you really are picky, huh," but it sounds fond, and at that, julius scowls a tad but a blush does cross his expression.

"i can hardly stop myself. you try standing around hundreds of people with enhanced hearing and scent and try not to feel dizzied."

"hey. it's alright, julius." sonic's hand is on julius' arm again. julius pauses, and sonic continues, "these things take time, yanno? small steps are still steps. n'hey, once you're feeling better, you can always try again. maybe at a smaller get-together."

what did i do, to deserve you? julius inhales a spell, before he's suddenly dropping down onto one knee, and then tugging sonic forward before hugging him. he can feel sonic tense up slightly, not having expected it. truthfully, julius hadn't either, but ⸻ he had just felt, compelled.

"i just thought you deserved to have a fun day out." sonic replied, and maybe it was the earnestness of his tone, but julius looked momentarily startled silent at what sonic had said. not wanting julius to feel awkward, he continued, "but i can also see that this's gettin to ya bit. hey how about we sneak down one of the side roads. letcha breathe for a spell." gloved hand lays on julius' arm, & sonic smiles easily up at him.

"....very well." & julius motioned for sonic to lead, since sonic knew the streets of station square forward and backwards by this point. and so sonic did, led them away from all that hustle and bustle, toward one of the roads that had less car & foot traffic because the road had been blocked off due to the festivities.

"thanks, for trying julius. i really mean that." sonic's glancing over at julius, "you don't gotta stay for the whole hour. we did say five minutes, originally."

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What is Your Hate Language?

VIOLENCE

Physical Violence is a common, yet bold hate language. It’s old as time and is as natural as rain. It’s often one of the first thoughts that come to us when we feel hatred, but you actually have the moxie to go through with it. Fist fights at bars and you think assassination is the best option in politics. You’re an absolute loose canon. Your most likely crime would be murder. The only down side of this hate language is how hard it is to get away with it.

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instantly, julius steps forward and clasps a hand onto colin's shoulders, both of them, in order to turn the shorter male's gaze up to look at him. & his voice is eclipsed by emotion, quivering in that held back rage - not at colin but at the moronic notion of what had just been told to julius. "if you are going to listen to me, once. if you are going to hear me clearly, then hear:

your mother's death WAS NOT your fault. do you understand. you were a baby for fuck's sake. you had zero control over what transpired that day."

there's a beat, as if julius needs a moment to compose himself. he releases colin's shoulders, takes a small step back from him. "you are worthy of much more than you give yourself credit for. your existence holds meaning. it always has." if to no one else, then at the very least, to me.

“I won’t judge you.”

My uncle said that too.

"I killed my mother. Just by existing. She died giving birth to me. No one has thought my life a worthwhile exchange for hers since."

The acceptance of his own dead mentor's doppleganger is a hot blade to the gut, over and over.

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they hate me for finding romance in the violent & violence in the romantic. also for the killing

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his left hand jerked forward, gripping at stone's wrist. his fingers twitched, thumb roaming and pressing into his wrist, to feel his pulse. julius' fingers, his whole hand, was quivering, shaking subtly. was he checking for stone's pulse, to make sure that he was really there?

or was it just to hold onto him?

he hears the breathing, and does his best to match that rhythm. but then, that feeling, that sensation getting worse in his chest. the breathing helped, for a spell, but- stone would feel julius' palm heating up, warming, as though an element on a stove just beginning to heat and give off a light waft of temperature-

hurriedly, julius let go of stone's wrist, and stepped back from him. the breaths were quicker now, shallow, "n-no, no," it's murmured, to himself? his palms move, cupping and pressing and covering his own face. "enough. stop." that burning would get worse- stone would no doubt smell it; flesh, starting to sear, but julius wasn't moving his hands away from his own face.

he'd ducked down now, squatting, hunched forward slightly. low, barely there mumbles, something along the lines of 'please no more. not now.' / 'you want to' / 'no' / 'liar.'

stone offers him a smile, very happy that julius was actually listening to him for once. he only wished it was under better circumstances. seeing the man start to do the little exercise saw stone joining in with him, hoping it would help him further in the little goal of calming julius down.

"you're doing so well. just continue until you start to feel better," stone says softly, continuing to do the breathing exercise with him.

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&. 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝟐 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  dialogue prompts taken from the silent hill 2 remake, developed by bloober team. trigger warning for dark themes. feel free to change as you seem fit. )

❛ in my restless dreams, i see that town. ❜

❛ hey, it's okay. i didn't mean to scare you. ❜

❛ i'm kind of lost. ❜

❛ i guess i don't really care if it's dangerous or not. i'm going either way. ❜

❛ what happened to this town? ❜

❛ whatever it is, it's not human. ❜

❛ i didn't do anything! he was like that when i got here. ❜

❛ you wanna come with? maybe together we can find a way out of this town. ❜

❛ sorry, but i can't leave. not yet. ❜

❛ are you afraid? ❜

❛ did you find the person that you were looking for? ❜

❛ don't worry, i'm not crazy. least, i don't think so. ❜

❛ should i go with you? this town really is dangerous. ❜

❛ what's a big dumb-dumb like you doing here anyway? ❜

❛ hey, that's not very nice. didn't your parents teach you any manners? ❜

❛ do i look like your girlfriend? ❜

❛ i can't believe it. your face, your voice... you could be— ❜

❛ i don't look like a ghost, do i? see? warm. ❜

❛ i can show you if you want. unless you have somewhere else to be? something else to do? ❜

❛ hey, easy there. i'm just messing with you. ❜

❛ you're coming with me? can't you just tell me where it is? ❜

❛ what, you were just gonna leave me here? alone? with all these monsters around? ❜

❛ is it because i remind you of... her? ❜

❛ this place we're going to, what is it, exactly? ❜

❛ you ever stay in a place like this? the walls are so thin you can hear everything. love, hate, jealousy... ❜

❛ i think you just saved my life back there. ❜

❛ hey. you think i'd look good in this one? ❜

❛ this room... there's something wrong with it. i think we should leave. ❜

❛ oh, loosen up. it sure beats running around with those monsters out there. ❜

❛ what will you tell her if... when you find her? ❜

❛ oh, c'mon. don't give me that look. i was just kidding. ❜

❛ can we stay? just for a little while? ❜

❛ this place, this whole thing, it's like a nightmare. i just wanted to get away from it, even for a second. ❜

❛ here. something to take the edge off. ❜

❛ we should probably get going. ❜

❛ we could come back later, if you want. you know, in case we need a break. ❜

❛ i wanted to ask you... what if you can't find [ name ]? what will you do? ❜

❛ thanks for checking up on me. it's very sweet of you. ❜

❛ how do you know my name? ❜

❛ i'm sorry, but i can't let you just run around this place. you might get hurt. ❜

❛ please open the door. there's something in here. ❜

❛ i was almost killed back there! i've never been so scared in my whole life! ❜

❛ all you care about is that dead wife of yours. ❜

❛ you couldn't care less about me, could you? ❜

❛ stay with me. don't leave me alone again. you're supposed to take care of me. ❜

❛ i don't know, for some reason i feel like it's up to me to protect her. ❜

❛ well, whaddaya know... a stroll in the rain. how romantic. ❜

❛ i'm trying to keep things light. just humor me, okay? ❜

❛ you think you could give me a hand? ❜

❛ you're supposed to be the big man around here. how's a little girl like me supposed to help? ❜

❛ what's wrong? i thought you wanted to get out of here. ❜

❛ this place is different from what i remember. i guess... things never really stay the same, do they? ❜

❛ you... still don't want me to go with you? if we stick together, we just might make it out of here. ❜

❛ ain't no big deal. just put the gun to their head and... pow! ❜

❛ you can't just kill someone 'cause of the way they looked at you. ❜

❛ please. i'll be good. i promise. ❜

❛ it's always the same with you. you're only after one thing. ❜

❛ i don't know who you think i am, but i don't want to hurt you. ❜

❛ i thought that thing killed you...! are you hurt? ❜

❛ but that thing... it stabbed you. there was blood everywhere. ❜

❛ stabbed me? what do you mean? ❜

❛ honey... did something happen to you? ❜

❛ are you confusing me with someone else? ❜

❛ you said you took everything. but you forgot the videotape we made. ❜

❛ it doesn't matter who i am. i'm here for you. ❜

❛ see? i'm real. ❜

❛ don't you want to touch me? ❜

❛ i'll come back, i promise. ❜

❛ how many times do i have to kill you? ❜

❛ it doesn't matter if you're smart, dumb, ugly, pretty... it's all the same once you're dead! ❜

❛ you wanna talk down to me some more? tell me to relax? ❜

❛ you know i'll find you! ❜

❛ guess i deserved it, huh? the fartface that i am. ❜

❛ you got any other things planned? i think i saw a dark room back there you could lock me up in. ❜

❛ where are you? i'm waiting for you. please, come to me. ❜

❛ i think you were right. what we're looking for... it's not here. ❜

❛ thank you for helping me earlier... but i wish you hadn't. ❜

❛ i know what you are. i know why i needed you. but it's all over now. i don't need you anymore. ❜

❛ it'd be easier if they just killed me. ❜

❛ why are you still here? i told you to go. ❜

❛ wait! please don't go. don't leave me alone. i didn't mean what i said. ❜

❛ please... tell me i'll be okay. ❜

❛ i'm here for you. so what if i'm not her? ❜

❛ i can give you what she never could. i can be better than her. ❜

❛ what else do you want me to be? ❜

❛ i won't let you do this to me. i won't let you go. ❜

❛ the truth is, i hated you. ❜

❛ i wanted my life back. ❜

❛ i tried. i really did. but... i just... can't go on without you. ❜

❛ i can't forgive myself for what i've done. ❜

❛ i want you to go on. i want you to live. for yourself and for others. ❜

❛ you made me happy. ❜

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⸻how easy it was, put the GUN to his head.

a lifetime of FUCKING things up.

➯indie rp blog for JULIUS IVO ROBOTNIK. ➯cursed by MARKER (34 | he/they). ➯est on tumblr in 2025, written privately for years. ➯novella, asks, headcanons & meta galore. ➯↻ if interested in interaction! please read carrd (🔗 above).

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Jeanette Winterson, Gut Symmetries

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