Latest Posts by duchess-of-nothing-and-nowhere - Page 2

// Illya Kuryakin’s smiles //      —for @koimizu

Gallya + car races

Headcanon that Gaby and Illya sometimes engage in car races against each other in between missions, just for fun and the kicks. They’re pretty evenly matched in their skills, which keeps the races interesting. Napoleon usually prefers to watch from the sidelines.

Netflix cancelling shows isn’t the problem, actually. is it annoying? sure. but the problem is they don’t finish them

they know what’s going to be renewed and what isn’t even before it airs. they’ve likely known for months that warrior nun wasn’t getting a season 3, probably before they even gave it s2

so why not tell them? why not say s2 will be the last? why encourage the show to create a bigger cliffhanger and make him fight to have the post credit scene when you know there won’t be a next? why not give creators an opportunity to finish their creations?

15 good shows with 2-3 seasons start-finish is better than 30 fantastic shows that ended on cliffhangers after 1 season

I don’t know who told Netflix that quantity mattered more than quality —- because it doesn’t. please, i’m begging, commit to something. because in binge era tv, 1 season is not enough, but 2 might be if you tell them in advance so they can wrap it up

Gallya + car races

Headcanon that Gaby and Illya sometimes engage in car races against each other in between missions, just for fun and the kicks. They’re pretty evenly matched in their skills, which keeps the races interesting. Napoleon usually prefers to watch from the sidelines.

I sometimes have a few issues with facial expressions, especially if there's no words being said. In that scene where Illya shocks Rudi for the first time he looks at Napoleon, but I can't tell if it's from Napoleon still having his hand on Rudi or from seeing how strong the electric was. Can you break down his expression for me, please?

I think it’s open to many interpretations, but I’ll try to break down his facial expressions as I see them.

First, I think I need to consider where Illya is at mentally. He’s just been “betrayed” by Gaby and his first priority is, not contacting his commanding officer and telling him the situation or trying to find the bomb, but finding Solo. Illya had been listening to the conversation between Gaby and her Uncle Rudi; he knows Uncle Rudi “needs to make a telephone call” and that’s likely to tell Victoria that Solo is CIA—Illya knows Solo is in trouble and needs to get to Solo before it’s too late (although from his perspective, it might already be too late, but he’s going to try to save Solo anyway—which I think says a lot. Perhaps he felt he owed Solo since Solo had been in a similar situation of not knowing if he was still alive after the boat incident but Solo went to save him from drowning anyway?)

Let’s assume that Solo is being held at the Vinciguerra shipping facility since that is most likely and the design of Rudi’s lab matches the design of that facility. This gives Illya some advantage because he’s already been there before and knows about the hidden button to get to the basement, however, the facility is heavily guarded.

Illya would have to find a way to sneak past, or probably fight off, all these guards to get to Solo. This is probably why, although Uncle Rudi and Illya were at the same location (Vinciguerra’s Manor) when Gaby exposed them, that Uncle Rudi got to Solo before Illya.  So Illya has done all this work to find Solo although he has no way of knowing if Solo is dead or alive. Fortunately, Solo is still alive. Now here’s where it’s a bit confusing for me, does Illya know that Solo was being tortured by electrocution? I don’t see how he cannot given that there are no other physical signs of torture. Solo is sweating, blood is streaming from his nose, and there are tears along his cheeks. Illya is also a skilled tech with proficiency in computer programming languages FACT and COBOL, so he would be able to recognize how the chair is wired up. Yet, after he’s strapped Rudi’s right hand, when he comes to the front of the chair, he looks curiously at the contraption with a foot pedal.

Although, perhaps he’s merely looking for the on switch? Either way, he’s startled when Rudi is electrocuted.

Interesting thing, though, is that he checks Solo’s reaction, not Rudi’s. Is this realization of how badly Solo was tortured? Or surprise that it is an electrocution device? (Which I don’t think makes sense, again because of his specialities… but he was also surprised to see an aircraft carrier… while flying over the ocean… which is also confusing but I guess you can argue that he didn’t expect the British Navy to get involved? I digress.)

Illya’s expression does change from surprise to this expression:

He’s looking more intensely at Solo. Perhaps this expression is deep concern over Solo’s welfare. This realization of what this chair does, if you want to call it realization, is unsettling to him. Perhaps he’s realizing how close Solo would have been to dying if he hadn’t gotten to him in time. Or perhaps he was worried he’d injured Solo again because he hadn’t been paying attention to the fact that Solo was still touching the chair. In this angle, Solo is still touching the chair when Illya presses the pedal:

I think you can make a lot of arguments on what Illya’s reaction means, but either way, he’s not happy. Once he knows what this chair will do to Rudi, he’s quite keen to torture Rudi with it for information. The second time he presses the pedal it’s in response to Uncle Rudi being willing to testify against anyone, even his own niece. The third time, he’s taking his anger for Gaby betraying him (“It’s not the same”) out on Rudi simply for the sake of doing it, but the pedal doesn’t work that time, but he keeps jamming his foot on the pedal anyway until Solo tells him it has a glitch. Illya is clearly disgusted by what Rudi subjected Solo to and angry at Gaby for endangering Solo as well. Which is probably why he fights against believing Gaby didn’t betray them and learning that Gaby is a British spy working for Waverly (“You’re wrong. […] You’re wrong. I saw her betray us at Vinciguerra.”) It takes Waverly telling him that he told Gaby to betray them for Illya to accept what had happened and forgive her. He realized she had no choice in the matter, that she had to obey Waverly, even if it meant possibly getting her teammates killed.

A difficult situation that Illya probably knows all too well.

In the end, he would have done exactly the same thing in her position.

Achievement unlocked: discovered piece of media at exact right time in your life to experience maximum peak emotional impact and infatuation

what's so great about the mummy 1999?

are you ready for this? 

it is the most wonderfully made, historically inaccurate, giddily fun, perfectly paced, goofy horror movie romance novel bullshit bonanza that has ever blessed the silver screen.

i mean it is just so beautifully full of every genre without being overwhelming.we’ve got: comedy, action, suspense, horror, romance, adventure, ancient aesthetics, and it’s a period piece. all perfectly balanced and blended into one movie.

and the characters are so LIT

we got our main babe, evelyn “motherfucking” carnahan, a super-klutz librarian, total history nerd, and certified badass/damsel in distress. she raises the dead on accident, because she cannot resist books, and has the guts to put that motherfucker back where he came from and literally saves the world.evie’s greatest hits: 

“what is a place like me, doing in a girl like this?!”

*after totally destroying the library* “i’ve just made a bit of a mess in the library.”

“no harm ever came from reading a book.”

evelyn: *upon opening the tomb* “i’ve dreamt about this since i was a little girl.”rick: “you dream about dead guys?”

“oops.”

then we’ve got rick “brendan fraser” o’connell, your not-so-typical battle hardened gun slinger with a heart of gold. he seems filthy, rude, and a complete scoundrel at first, but then he turns into a literal puppy, with massive heart eyes, that worships the ground evie walks on.rick’s greatest hits:

*screams at mummy*

*screams at sand*

*screams at things that are illogical to scream at*

*screams*

next is our Comedic Relief Character™, jonathan carnahan, who also rises above his trope. he’s there for the laugh sure, but is never useless. he actively helps to move the plot along and isn’t just there. he also is the farthest thing from brainless and annoying.jonathan’s greatest hits:

evelyn: “have you no respect for the dead?”jonathan: “of course i do, but sometimes i’d rather like to join them.” same.

oh and that time he was like “IMHOTEP” and saved his own ass like that was so smooth, y’all know what i’m talking about right??

then there is ardeth BAE. he is the audience rolling his eyes because *sighs* white people. he’s tired of these motherfucking mummies in this motherfucking desert. literally prettier than everyone.(he has a much bigger role in the mummy returns, but is still so fab here)

and of course THE MUMMY. imhotep. actual emo. literally carved some poetry into the back of his sarcophagus when he was buried alive with flesh eating bugs, because he is that Extra™. just wants to bring his girlfriend back to life so he can make out with her without it being treason. 

and all the side characters are also gr8.

now i wanna take a moment to talk about the romance. because it is so BEAUTIFUL. like usually in action movies it’s macho man undermines girl and they bone. not here. no time for that shit. 

rick and evie have such a great relationship based on mutual respect and affection. they both cater to each other’s strengths and cover each other’s weaknesses. they are the literally definition of: “those two. in a fight, they’re lethal. around each other, they melt”

what else, i could literally talk about this movie all day.

the special effects have held up pretty well.the music score is GORGEOUS.the costumes are amazing.the makeup, especially for anck su namun, OH WOW.the george of the jungle era brendan fraser sign me the fuck up.rachel weisz.

so many good things.

it’s just great.

#i secretly rate every action movie from 0 to the mummy

it’s a beautiful mess of a movie that can be enjoyed by people of all ages and transcends time and posterity as the alpha mummy movie, and to those who disagree i beseech you:

Blood loss? No I know exactly where it is

one hyperfixated tumblr mutual has the power of six hundred thousand ad campaigns

Let's talk about The Mummy (1999)

Someone was talking at me yesterday about this movie and I was getting riled so I decided to go full rant. Specifically in regards to the feminist podcast that slammed it.

I don't even remember which podcast it was, but I am still rankled and baffled that any "feminism in movies" podcast could jump to anything but "this movie is phenomenal."

First of all, even just discussing the overall quality: sure, it might not have been groundbreaking with its cgi or plot twists. But back in the 90s, that wasn't the standard of measure like it is now (and even now is a shitty standard that needs to die). This movie was light and funny and yet hit all the right beats to maintain the dire stakes needed to make it a compelling action flick.

Its characters are fully realized and entirely distinct from each other. Even those treated with a broader brush, such as the Americans, were charismatic enough that we were fully invested in their fate. The entire cast of characters were real people with real impact and real agency.

The script is quotable and fucking hilarious. There are gems from literally every single character. Rick and Evie have actual chemistry, aided by Rachel Weisz's natural magnetism and Brendan Frasier's career-long knack for acting utterly charmed with his female costars.

Actually, let's talk about Rick O'Connell for a second. This is peak 90s Brendan Frasier. He is absolutely GORGEOUS, suave, and cool, rugged and handsome. He is the epitome of the 1920s adventure hero. Dear god I want to kiss those casting directors. But for all his general peak masculinity? He's feminist as fuck. He is equally dumbstruck by Evie as she is by him, and it's wholly evident that it's more than a "oh no she's hot" thing.

How do we know?

He steals her some tools to dig with. This gift demonstrates that he a) has identified her passion for archaeology, b) has recognized her proficiency in the field, despite it not being explicitly stated on screen, and c) sees a chance to restore her full and active participation in the discovery of Hamunaptra.

There is never a moment where Rick assumes to be the leader of the expedition. He is the weapons expert, the muscle--and he knows it. Better than that, he's totally okay with it. He follows Evie's lead in all things.

Another favorite moment of mine is when they're facing off with the American team on Day 1, and Evie realizes there's a chamber underneath Anubis they could use to excavate the statue. She puts her hand on Rick's arm, looks him in the eye, and says very deliberately "there are other places to dig." And he yields, instantly.

By comparison, see the way the Americans treat their workers and guide.

Does he groan about his work being made exponentially harder as a result? Nope. And that's a recurring theme in his behavior the entire goddamn movie. The only time he is in charge is when a situation is in his wheelhouse-- namely, combat and rescue. And it deserves mentioning that the majority of the time that he's in charge, Evie is not present.

Meanwhile, Evie-- her adventurer's spirit chafing in an academia that dismisses her for her gender-- is an absolute marvel. She is visually coded as being very feminine (she's in dresses and long hair most of the film), but that fact in no way detracts from her competence and agency.

She is consistently protrayed as a fully capable expert in egyptology and there is never a single moment where she waffles on what to do. Even when she's the damsel in distress, she actively makes the choice to be so because she weighs the potential outcomes and decides doing so provides their best chance of success.

Evie is never the passive victim. She is constantly brash, constantly scheming, and saves the lives of her would-be rescuers mid-abduction. And when her brother (who is the failure of the family, against type) needs help with translation, she correctly translates for him while being throttled by a mummified priestess.

When I first saw this film, I was too young to realize how novel it was. Back then, all I knew was that it was just a good time. But now as an adult-- an adult acutely aware of the treatment female characters have gotten in the twenty years since-- I marvel at the respect with which the writers and directors treated Evie.

I marvel at how tender Rick was allowed to be, despite his rugged adventurer archetype.

The Mummy (1999) is peak storytelling. It doesn't try to outsmart the audience, but rather lays out a consistent, coherent narrative that gives the characters and viewers room to breathe. It invests the audience enough to care whether the characters succeed in their goals.

The Mummy (1999) does it right. It's the reason that any talk of the Tom Cruise version gets an immediate eyeroll from me, because whatever modern grimdark grit they shove into a story about a mummy cannot compare to the reliable and timeless entertainment of the 1999 adaptation.

All modern media should aspire to be the kind of film that The Mummy (1999) is.

.

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

nick nelsons little curled up lopsided smile. you agree. reblog

seriously I had some little TikTok teenybopper burst out laughing on my tour because I said that a historical figure was “most likely what we’d now call gay”

like

listen

you’re free to take a ouija board out to the cemetery and try to explain the dizzying array of current queer terms and get a solid answer as to how he identifies within that framework but 

until then, I’m going to continue NOT definitively assigning someone identity terms they didn’t self-identify with, and might not have even known, when I’m responsible for representing them faithfully and they’re not here to correct me. even more so when they’re part of my own community

I mean, you know, as long as that’s okay with you. Bestie.

The owner of this blog has too many feelings for fictional characters.

Okay but what if schoolboy Thomas didn’t fall for Alastair despite him being a dick and Thomas being like but I see greater depths in him

What if sickly babied his whole life Thomas took one look at Alastair and went FINALLY someone who isn’t going to treat me like I’m going to keel over and die if they don’t treat me with extreme kid gloves every second of the day

Like sure when he got all super focused on him and noticed that Alastair seemed like he was really sad and lonely and had greater depths that added to it

But even his sisters and friends were his stand in parents and babying him and trying to coddle him and protect him from anyone mean and anything that might hurt him and his friends that were all younger than him all acted like they were older and responsible for him (even though Thomas was held back and started school late with them) and all of his parents’ friends were the same and can you imagine how sick of being coddled he must have been?

Hot take, Thomas’s interest in Alastair originated with in a twisted way Alastair being the first person to treat him like a real person and not a little boy made of glass

And Alastair not wanting to let him go off on his own and get murdered but letting him go out on patrol on his own and keeping an eye on him in case he needed to join the fight at his side instead of pulling him out of it just like Thomas was any other shadowhunter out on patrol without a partner instead of seeing him as still that sick little boy and stopping him from trying at all like everyone else did because of it was just an added layer to the initial reason Thomas fell for him, even before Alastair had done anything to deserve his attention and affection

anyone please ask your crush out like this

TDA - TLH parallels:

Mark glared. "She [Cristina] is nothing like me."

"You don't have to be like someone to love them," said Emma.

- Lord of Shadows

"I am nothing like you, Thomas," said Alastair.

- Chain of Iron

Just saw this pickup line "Are you a tower? Because Eiffel for you" and it just screamed Thomastair to me. Specifically, I think Alastair would say this to Thomas because

1) Thomas is a giant and towers over everyone

and 2) they were specifically talking about the Eiffel Tower in ChoG

And now I just headcanon that Alastair said this to Thomas at one point who just laughed himself to tears.

So in Learn About Loss, Jem (Brother Zachariah) inquires after Annabel Blackthorn, believing her to be an Iron Sister. This must surely mean that Malcolm will not do anything too obviously necromantic in CoT, otherwise Jem surely would have heard.

Know what I want from Chain of Thorns?

After they’ve gotten Lucie back, her working on The Beautiful Cordelia some more and deciding to write in a love interest for Thomas since we already know she writes her friends in a lot and thinks everything needs x1000 romance

Give me Lucie asking him about girls they know and what he thinks of them and don’t you think she has the nicest hair and don’t you think she’s funny trying to fish for who she should use for inspiration and try to figure out what kind of characteristics Thomas likes in a girl

Give me Thomas answering those questions at first while he’s kind of confused but doesn’t yet realize what’s happening and then when she gets to about question three being like Lucie what are you doing and her explaining to him how Lord Thomas needs a love interest and she needs inspiration to help write a perfect girl for him and how it’s hard because he’s never really seemed all that interested in any girls in particular

Give me Thomas hesitating and considering what to do and lowkey thinking that it’s stupid to tell Lucie about his sexuality just to have an imaginary boyfriend instead of an imaginary girlfriend in her made up story but also not wanting to lie and make up a girl type or tell her the truth about his type and have her interpret it as that’s what he likes in girls and make some girl version of Alastair that’s all wrong and not wanting Lucie to start pointing out real girls to him that she thinks he would like

And part of him really does want his character to have a guy as a love interest if he has to have a love interest at all and he does want to tell Lucie even though it makes him nervous (but he already knows she has no problem with Anna and Matthew’s sexualities and writing them into the stories so that helps a bit)

Give me Thomas telling her that that’s because he hasn’t been interested in any girls and Lucie being like oh okay well then do you like boys? What kinds of boys do you like? Oh, maybe Lord Thomas will meet a prince! and Thomas being relieved that she’s acting the same as she was before she knew but also still overwhelmed and embarrassed by the volume of enthusiastic questions about his type and whether he would find this kind of character or that kind of character more interesting romantically

Also give me Lucie asking if he wants the Lord Thomas stories being private stories just for them with him just having a very mysterious love interest no one knows anything about in the main story she shares with everyone else and letting him decide if and when he’s fine with her sharing the stories that focus on his love interest while still including him in the stories and still giving him his own (somewhat) more accurate love interest

Cast Long Shadows:

"You do not know what he [Alastair] said to me the day we were expelled."

Tom shrugged. "Some nonsense, I expect. He always speaks the most shocking nonsense when he is overset. You shouldn't listen to him."

A couple of lines later: "Oh well," said Tom. "I like his nonsense." He looked wistful. "I think Alastair masks his pain with cleverly turned phrases."

Can we talk about how Thomas knew Alastair extremely well, even back then? And how Matthew could have saved himself (and Thomastair) a lot of drama if he had just listened to Thomas? Now I just want a novella with each conversation in which Thomas got to know Alastair so well.

I also hope that Tom will remember his own advice in CoT... Not that I want him to stop listening to Alastair

If Chain of Thorns doesn’t end with:

Lucie and Jesse engagement

Cordelia and James honeymoon to Constantinople

Thomas kissing Alastair in front of everyone at a party

Ariadne and Anna finally dancing together

Grace and Christopher working on science-y stuff together

and Matthew drinking water

imma riot

"Thomas was so quiet and small they were always losing him, rather like a human marble, and if left to his own devices he would inevitably roll toward Alastair Carstairs. [...] It was a simple matter to locate Thomas when he was lost. Matthew only had to follow the sound of Alastair's irritating voice."

- Cast Long Shadows

My HEART💔

Do you think CC will rewrite the CP2 epilogue after TLH finishes given that some things after Chog already don't match up? Like Barbara being present

She might change some things for when they order a new reprint. Different editions already have different people appearing in the epilogue. My best friend’s version doesn’t have Lucie in it but mine does, for example...

Also consider that Alastair has a very dry/sarcastic/cynic sense of humour and that he tends to be a little bit dramatic. I would not expect Thomas to say that he's dying when he is "only" heavily injured because that just doesn't match his personality, but Alastair?

When, however, did Cassie share the snippet? Could it be something that belonged to another book/trilogy and was cut out?

okay so, do y’all remember that one thing that cassie shared with us, that death scene of one of the members of a shadowhunter chronicles gay couple? i don’t remember it word for word, but it goes something like this:

“funny, all that trouble to convince me that you didn’t love me, and here i am, dying in your arms”

the person that is dying then proceeds to kiss each and every one of the others fingers, their last

here’s my theory: it’s thomastair. thomas lightwood dying specifically

now i’m sorry about this, but it makes sense.

hear me out:

1. thomastair still isn’t completely canon, and alastair is spending an awful lot of time trying to convince thomas he doesn’t love him, because he thinks that’s best for both of them

i know that’s flimsy evidence but keep reading

2. if you check the shadowhunters family tree, we see that the rest of the carstairs family are descendants of alastair. i’ve seen a theory similar to this that says alastair dies, but if he does, that’s the end of the other side of the carstairs line aside from jem, and we all know alastair has to have descendants, because emma exists. it could be baby carstairs, but we don’t know that for sure

3. if you also check the family tree, it shows that thomas doesn’t end up with anyone officially. which means either he stayed single or he’s dead. and considering alastair ended up with someone else, it is more likely that thomas is dead than with someone else.

4. finally, thomas’s name is sort of foreshadowing in itself. he’s named after thomas, the mundane that worked for the london institute during tessa will and jem’s story. our past thomas died, and i think this foreshadowing might hint to our thomas dying

so, yeah just had to get that off my chest because it was causing me major anxiety.

feel free to prove me wrong! actually please prove me wrong i don’t want thomas to die :(

but please reference this post if i’m right