Not Originally Mine but I want to post as Solidarity! đ”đžđ„đšđ©đ„đžđ©đ„
ghost x f! reader | ~5k words cw: simon lies, mean simon, red flags? what red flags, hunting, animal death (discussed), predator/prey, knives, bad restraints, bad suspension, rough (arguably bad) sex, clothed man & naked woman, blood, murder, italic abuse. please tell me if you need something tagged. a/n: a cross between this post and this post. banner by @/cafekitsune. đȘ
Simon lets slip that he owns a cabin nearly a year into the relationship. Itâs the kind of thing where you could and maybe should be upset, but you play it off as no big deal. You have to. This is Simon. The man didnât show his entire face until the sixth or seventh date.
(He joked about it, too, that first timeâBreathe a word about this mug, and Iâll have to kill ya. You laughed, delirious as he split you in two. He didnât.)
Itâs a few hours away from the city, on the far edge of the boonies. Itâs long beyond the truck stops and hog refineries that dot this part of the country. Far from delivery and traffic lights. Deep in an unincorporated village, in an unincorporated area. Its remoteness would make one wonder how a foreign ex-soldier found such a location, but again. This is Simon. Ages ago, you learned questions earn neither his favor nor answer.
The property is impressive for its locale. Two bedrooms. A decent kitchen. Heating and cooling. A garage and a shed. Renovated within the last decade and upgraded piecemeal when Simon has time. It sits on a lake shared by only two other cabins, both residing around a reedy bend and well out of sight.
Upon arrival, Simon doesnât offer a tour, telling you to poke around as he unpacks the car. Well, a jerk of his head and a gruff, âGo on in.â Since you started seeing each other officially, he doesnât often let you burden yourself with chores. No lifting a finger if heâs available.
The place is sparse. Occupied but not lived in. While stocking a cupboard, Simon explains the previous owner, an older gentleman with cheap taste, left behind what decoration remains. A few tacky fishing signs hang on the walls, intermixed with sun-bleached squares on the wood paneling. A curio box collection of novelty keychains in the hall to the bedrooms, full of states and a couple of names. The lumpy pillows on the sofa pouf tobacco-scented dust when you test its cushions.
Tiptoeing into the main bedroom, you imagine how you might spruce up the austere space. Considering he moved into your apartment after three months, you assume itâs a matter of time until this becomes your cabin, too.Â
(It was incredibly romanticâthe move. Near sunset, Simon appeared like a specter in the pouring rain, with his few worldly belongings in tow. Kissed you hard and fast, told you he couldnât stay at his place anymore. That he needed you. You. All your effort paid off.)
The memory brings a smile to your face.
Youâll turn the cabin into a cozy love nest like your apartment. Blankets, candles, a rug or two. Though heâll never admit it, Simon must desire comfort like anyone else. The first night he burrowed into your duvet, luxuriating in the cotton and silk, he fell asleep like an old hound freshly sprung from a shelter. He tossed most of his stuff the next dayâsaid you had everything he needed.
Looking around, you realize you have your work cut out for you. The austere room more a cave than a refuge. The man's bed doesn't even have a frame. Just a neatly made mattress with tucked sheets and two flat pillows. A secondhand dresser and a stack of plastic drawers for extra storage. On the bright side, the adjacent bathroom is spotlessly clean, with a caddy holding melamine sponges, bleach, and other supplies on a shelf. He's always been tidy, likely a military thing.
From the living room, you're greeted with a scenic view of the lake and the adjoining deck through the glass door. A pair of wooden chairs sit side-by-side in front of a fire pit, one of Simon's old welding projects. Down the gentle slope to the shore, a small dinghy rests in the water, tied off at the aluminum dock. A smattering of yellow and white water lily pads hug the bank.
Peaceful. Picturesque. Private.Â
But your eyes hitch on a strange beam.
Bolted between two mature trees, a hefty piece of timber sits within plain sight of the deck. A series of evenly spaced, fixed eyelet hooks and two pulleys catch the light when the breeze shifts the canopy of the bur oak overhead.
Simon joins you on the deck, the planks creaking beneath his bulk. A cracked beer dwarfed in his hand.
âDid the former owner have kids?â You ask as he sips.
âKids?â
You point at the curious installation. âIsnât that for a tire swing? Seems like the perfect spot.â
Simon stares, narrowing his eyes slightly with a chuckle. The tone of it pricklesâthe same snide laugh he makes at his own awful jokes. When heâs in on the punchline, and youâre not. One of the few things that sour his image.
âKids? Fuck no,â He shakes his head. âThatâs where I âang deer and the like out to bleed.â
You bristle and duck the arm he means to drape around your shoulders, ignoring how he huffs baby and câmon, donât be like that between snickers.Â
He finds you in the bedroom, sorting the clothes you packed with punchy aggression, fuming and embarrassed by his teasing. Stupid and naive, thatâs how you feel, for all your care and commitment. Youâre just so silly, such a townie, for not recognizing a piece of lumber as a barbaric vehicle for slaughter.
Two wide mitts glide over your sides as you try your best to ignore the behemoth behind you. You are by no means small, but Simon. Fuck, Simon, you whisper, half-exasperated when he nuzzles into the crook of your neckâheâsâfuck, he is big.
Itâs an hour before your clothes are finally put away, and youâre already down a pair of underwear for the weekend. Simon leaves you sated and dozing, a tactile apology accepted, and retrieves you to fix supper when heâs hungry. Later, parked in the chairs in the yard, watching the end of the sunâs march to the horizon, you broach the topic again.
âWill you take it down?â
âSweetheart, what do ya think I do on the weekends you work?â
You shiver. Ten seconds ago, youâdâve said read or weld or fish. Itâs ridiculous how your mind cannot wrap around the idea of Simon out in the woods, stalking through the trees and underbrush, hunting. Decked out in blaze orange and realtree, rifle cradled in his hands. You know his history and what heâs capable of. What heâs done.
But this is different from his military career. Simon said he didnât want to do any of that. Enlisting was how he escaped a lousy home life; he didnât plan to get stuck in it for as long as he did. He confessed once, after a silly tiff over your job, that the day he was discharged was the best day of his life, second only to the day you met. Thatâs where the disconnect lies. Hunting and killing for sport, thatâs not the Simon you know.
You tell him as much.
âThat so?â His smirk matches the rising moon. A waxing crescent.
You insist.
Simon cracks his neck. âTell you what, Iâll make you a deal,â he starts, fingers flexing around the neck of the beer bottle. âIâll quit, if I can bag one last trophy.â
The thought of burning the beam distracts you from the flicker in his eyes. The ugly thing is the only hiccup keeping the cabin from textbook perfection. You donât want to think of Bambiâs poor mother dangling like some macabre ornament whenever you look outside.
âFine. Whatâs the trophy?â
Simon grins.
~~
âI better win a fucking award for this. Itâs freezing.â Youâd said, tugging on your sneakers.
He laughed wickedly. The sound burned right up your spine.
âYouâll get a fucking award, alright.â
Simon sent you off a half hour ago if the time on his watchâs dull, glowing face is correct. He buckled it around your wrist before you darted into the woods, tightening it as far as it would go. It spins loose around the bone anyway. He warned you to watch your footing, pressed bear mace into your palm, and then gave you five minutes to make yourself scarce. Inwardly, you preen. To go undiscovered for this longâyouâve surpassed your own expectations.
However, squatting with your back to a distressingly damp tree trunk, regret eclipses pride and buzzes under your skin. Hopefully, it's not a parasite from one of the puddles you stomped through. It's out of devotion, you tell yourself, itching under a wet sock, that you agreed to this game. Out of love. There isn't much you wouldn't do for Simon. From the moment you met him, it's been magnetic. Poetic.
And that first date? Cinematic. You went out with one man and returned home with another. Your date caught Simon staring from across the joint, a mean set of eyes in a ski mask eating you alive. What kind of man lets another steal his âbirdâ? Thatâs what he called youâbirdie. Need some company, birdie? Complete disregard for the flop-haired man across the table. Cupped a hand to your dateâs ear, said a few words, and Mike or Matt or whatever his name was vacated his seat, leaving the big Brit to take his place.
Bringing him home was a foregone conclusion, the decision finalized as you watched him, absolutely rapt, stab the meat of your entree and claim it as his own. Rolled up his balaclava just enough to take a bite with a row of crooked teeth. Breath hitching at the scars, the pale white lines stretching over his chin. You didnât even know his name when you blurted out the question. And itâs with fondness you recall the flash of surprise in his eyes at your resolute zeal. Didn't make him work for it, offered yourself up on a silver platter.
('Course, afterward, you had to convince him not to fuck you in the parking lot, promising breakfast in the morning if he slept over. He did. For two days. He kept turning up after that.)
You may be hiding in the woods, but he's the animal. Yes. A neglected stray you dedicated the better part of a year into domesticating. Lured him with food, a warm bed, and sex. Assiduously filing down his sharp teeth and rough edges with your body. Introducing him to creature comforts, to living versus mere survival.
Which, again, prompts the questionâwhy hunting? Didnât you take care of him? If he needed more, all he had to do was ask. Take. Prying a burr off of a sleeve, you wonder if it's like the old saying goes: you can't teach an old dog new tricks. Maybe he needs to chase or track, and youâre another soft-handed city slicker keeping a working dog cooped up in an apartment.
If you still saw your therapist, sheâd probably suggest you dissect that. But you donât, and youâre not inclined to schedule a session. Besides, Simon said all shrinks areâ
A twig snaps. It shocks you how quickly you push to your feet.
Twenty feet or so dead ahead, a hulking mass moves through a thin shaft of moonlight.
You run.
Huffing and puffing, you charge clumsily through the trees, miraculously avoiding clusters of roots and shielding your face with your hands. Feels unnatural to run from him. The blood rush in your ears drowns out the heavy thuds on the ground behind you, Simon pursuing, shirking stealth for speed.
Inevitably, he overtakes you. An iron grip latches onto your shirt, and a kick sweeps your legs. The bear mace flies from your hand into the brush, clanging off a tree. You dangle for a spine-tingling second, suspended, heart lurching into your throat. He leverages your tumbling momentum to swing you to the ground at his feet through strength alone. Landing on the cold floor of the woods expels a gasp, a second following as a boot presses between your shoulders. No force behind it; its presence alone enough to keep you down. Despite the dirt and twigs surely sticking to your front and the borderline painful thunder of your heart, you smile in relief. Itâs over. His last hunt. The boot lifts.
âNice work, big guy,â You cough, breathing hard. âCan weâSimon?â
Before you can move, Simon nudges the toe of a boot into your ribs, compelling you to roll over. You startle at the sight looming above, a strangled, incoherent string of mouth noises trickling out of shock. A pair of brown eyes peer through the orbits of a skull attached to a mask. They trail from your face to your stomach, where he takes advantage of your stupefied babbling, binding your hands with cord. You meet his gaze, heat creeping up your neck, and his eyes crinkle.
About a dozen questions surface on the return march to the cabin. None survive the swirling vortex of your head, unwilling to risk appearing perfidious.Â
Simon flexes his grip over your bound hands. âGonna have some fun.â
Your faith does not lapse, though fear simmers low in your belly when he doesnât lead you to the cabin but toward the beam. A fluorescent nylon rope now feeds through the hooks and pulleys, and an oxidized steel, wide-based triangle sways freely. Beckoning. A humiliating whimper escapes as he positions you on a circle of dead grass, hands of a hangman on your hips.
âSaid you wanted a fucking award.â
A fucking award. A fucking award.
Simon reclaims his watch and then methodically changes your bindings. A hand to each vertice, he fastens you to the gambrel and kisses away a rogue tear. He tugs and tests the rope. It shouldnât induce a flood, and yet.
âIs itâCan it hold me?â
âBirdie, this is built for stags and boars. It can hold me.â He strokes your cheek, tapping the bone with a knuckle, then breaks away. âStay put.â
As if you have a choice.
Leaving you with the frogs and crickets, you watch Simon retreat indoors. A breeze carries a cool rush of air from the lake, your thin top a poor barrier to the slight chill. You take deep, rattling breaths to slow your heartbeat, still racing from the pursuit.
A distant click breaks the quiet, followed by a low, electrical buzz and the sudden, blinding intensity of light. It sears your vision before you can screw your eyes shut, blinking away the phosphenes with a noise of displeasure. The sensationâs almost enough to knock you off your feet. You squint, sight adjusting, and track the source to a previously unseen flood lamp affixed to the oak tree some distance away.
Simon returns shortly after you regain your bearings, his imposing silhouette accentuating his mass. Closer, heâs stripped down to a fraying and stained white t-shirt, but your eyes hone in on the rig fastened around a thick thigh. The cut of the strap guides your eye to the straining denim, and the image of his dick flashes in your mind, scorching like the flood lamp.
He extracts a knife from the sheath, steel reflecting light like a mirror. You squirm, a cross between impatient and uncomfortable. Is he cutting you down already? What was the pointâ
He pulls the front of your shirt, setting the knife edge to the hem.
âSimon,â your voice jumps high in your throat. âDonât you dare.â
A steady upward glide answers the warning, cleaving the material in two open drapes. The breeze hits your sweat, the band of your bra suddenly chilled and sticking, though that doesnât last long as he slices through it, too.
âSomeone could see!â you stammer, nipples tightening in the night air.
âYouâre frettinâ over nothinâ, sweetheart. Nobodyâs out here. Open.â Simon demands, pressing the hilt to your lips. âGood girl.â he praises when you relent to bite the compressed leather between your teeth, catching a whiff of polish. He rips off the remnants of your top and bra, dropping them to the ground in scraps. A big hand fondles and weighs a tit in its palm as if he hasnât played with it before. Thereâs a deep inhale from behind the mask as he swipes a thumb beneath its mass, then a chuckle. âWork up a sweat?â
The hand with the knife carefully discards the mask, revealing smears of eyeblack, and he pops his thumb into his mouth to suck it clean. A gasp slips out when he steps closer, hand engulfing the tissue again, pushing it up to glide his nose along the underside, tongue trailing. He nips, soothing after you yelp.
You mourn your expensive leggings when he shreds them next, reducing them to ribbonsâanother deep breath and a throaty laugh, selfish and all too pleased.
âKnew I smelled ya in the woods.â
âYou ruinedâyou tore themââ
âThought youâd get lucky tonight?â Scarred knuckles drag from your ribs to your thigh, squeezing, his thumb rubbing sweet circles over old stretch marks. Your wires cross, his blatant rewrite of the afternoon makes your lips purse, but his hand, Christ, your toes curl in your sneakers. âA quick screw in the woods?â He sheathes his knife to trace a finger along the crease of your thigh.
Air whistles through your teeth in a sharp inhale. He skims, dipping to gather some of your wetness, licking his fingers clean again. He hums appreciatively. âGet off on being chased? Fuckinâ dripping, birdie.â
Your hole twitches at his teasing, and you know he must see it with the sneer he gives you alongside the abrupt plunge of two fingers. The hand on your thigh migrates to your ass, pulling you snug to the webbing.Â
âSimon!â A curse hisses out as he burrows his fingers in as deep as theyâll go, curlingânot for your pleasure, no, but to keep you there, a crude hook. The rope strains as you squirm, impaled, and stretched too tight on his hand, clenching uncontrollably as if your cunt canât make up its mind. A flurry of sensations meets head-on with reason, and logicâs never been your strong suit. Reduced to need and want in equal measure, a single twist of his fingers confirms youâre as desperate as the night you met him.
You donât notice his other hand abandoning your backside for the rope. What squeaks first, you or the pulleys? Itâs sudden, the way you slide off his fingers with a lewd pop, feet leaving the ground. He hoists you up and up, the movement practiced, tying you off like the boat secured around a cleat hook.Â
Some feet off the ground, naked and shivering in the dark, exposedâyou should feel fear, but the other shoe, instinct or intuition, doesnât drop. All the vulnerability does instead is send a white-hot pulse to your clit. A plea leaves your mouth before your brain considers anything else. Pelvis tilting. He awards your eagerness with a grind of a zipper and a gratified grunt. Simon tugs his jeans and boxers down, then bends slightly to hitch your legs.
Your legs settle around him, and though he huffs when you squeeze, trying to ease the pressure off your wrists, you think he likes it. The ropes above slack little, raised higher than heâs tied you. With a massive hand back on your hip, he uses the other to feed his cock into you, bringing the line taut once more as he pulls you down.
The steady shove and fullness push a low whine from your mouth, which Simon smothers with a toothy kiss. It stings someâyouâre not nearly wet enough, only quieting with the faith heâll make it better. However, the fact that he doesnât give you time to adjust isnât promising.
He ruts. Barges in. Takes what he needs in full strokes. Builds a pace that rattles the hardware and your insides. The pain steadily stressing your wrists and lower back is secondary. Third, probably, to pleasure and heat, though the former isnât building as fast as the latter. Sweat beads in your hairline and neck, collecting under your breasts and in the creases of your belly. Makes your calves slick where they press into his sides, the cotton of his shirt sticking to his and your muscles.
âSimon, I canâtââ The words eke out, abdomen and thighs burning, friction in the wrong places.
His arms flex, boots shuffling over dirt and grass to further beneath you, cock dragging along your walls at a drastic angle, head jabbing into your cervix. More support, less comfort. A bitter trade-off, exchanging one hurt for another. The pinch of his brow makes the bursting stars at the edges of your vision worth it.
Each thrust shakes you in the rope, pulleys whining in solidarity. The sound of skin slapping skin echoes across the cabinâs yard, coupling with your gasps and Simonâs ragged breaths. After a particularly harsh snap of his hips, laughter, deep and gular, trickles out of his mouth. "You feelinâ alright, sweetheart?" he drawls, voice oozing sangfroid. âYâlike your award?â
That has you shuddering. His hands settle on your ass, fingers digging into the soft flesh in a way thatâs sure to leave marks. âLook at you, strung up so prettily. Pretty fucking ornament.â
Bambiâs poor mother.
Simon's voice and the image of a dangling deer carcass collide, punctuated with a thrust like a battering ram. It forces another string of needy sounds. Discomfort and desire coil in your stomach, twisting into a warm mass with a life of its own. You feel every inch as he withdraws and shoves in. The heat of him, the hardness. Nylon chafes your skin, each buck a reminder of your helplessness. Restraints are nothing new, but this isâ
The air leaves your lungs in one big whoosh as Simon hits a sweet spot.
You slump a bit, legs close to jelly from bracing.Â
Finally, an adjustment. Simon slows to meld himself further into you, and itâs then, sucking in deep breaths, you marvel at how perfectly level you are to be fucked like this. He bands a single thick arm beneath your ass in a casual display of strength, the other snaking between you. Chin to chest, he spits, the glob hitting your clit like a bullseye. Youâd cringe if his thumb didnât chase after it, spreading his saliva. The sudden break, coupled with his attention, makes you quiver. Anticipation gaining on torment. His thumbâs rhythm quickens, alleviating the aches. Youâll be sore as hell come morning, but as you have before, youâll forgive again.
With a new, albeit haphazard, focus on your clit, he rolls his hips at a more languid pace. The shift is a knifeâs edge between torture and bliss.Â
âStill want me to take it down? Donât know if I will, birdie, like the idea of keepinâ you up âere, âanging for the takinâ whenever I want ya.â A chuckle vaporizes into a hiss. âShit, you like the sound of that?
If you could manage speech, youâd say yes. Simonâs rewired your synapses in a matter of seconds with the rough pad of a finger. Heâs backlit from this angle. Haloed. Suits him, you think. What youâre feeling is rapturous, however ruthless it may be. Animalistic, really. If you let him leave the beamâthis is what youâll remember. Not some fresh-killed doe staring into nothing. But you, Simon, and the orgasm he harvests.Â
It creeps up on you. You howl, jerking in the ropes, muscles spasming and weeping. Revived with a burst of adrenaline, your legs try to close automatically, only to press uselessly into his sides. Thereâs no stopping him and nowhere to go until heâs done. Your body sags in its ties like a puppet.
Simon snarls something, and his palms return to your ass, abandoning all pretense. A haze rolls, thick as molasses, over you as he uses you to his end. He goes silent the few seconds before he comes, breathing harshly through his nose. One last snap of his hips, a deep grunt, and his cock floods your pussy. His chest heaves. Breaths heavy and stunted. Burrowing into your chest, he digs his nose into your sternum and rasps his teeth over your frantic heartbeat.
Your eyes droop along with the rest of your person. Everything disappears under a tenebrous wave.
Movement. The grind of the pulleys. The sawing of a knife. A sliver of lucidity buoys you, a headrush from popping to the surface after drowning. Your head throbs, the world spins, and by the time you make sense of it, you hear the familiar creak of the cabin steps.Â
Simon lays you out on the lumpy mattress, brushing his fingers over your hair and skin. He disappears, and you float in and out of consciousness. Thoroughly fucked.
You briefly wake when he tucks you in. The crux of your legs is damp, and a faint medicinal smell emanates under the blanket. Layers of gauze over aloe wrap your wrists where they lay beside your head on a flat pillow, and you wiggle your fingers experimentally.
âSleep.â He says, poking your forehead.
Your throat hurts. âStay.â
The bed dips when he obliges. He molds to your back, smushing your chest with an arm and cupping a tit. His breath fans over the shell over your ear, and when youâre on the edge of sleep, he murmurs something, but the words run together.
Somehow, he falls asleep before you. Sated. Ran out. You take care of him, and he takes.
~~
An emaciated tick floats with its legs curled in on itself in a glass on the floor next to the bed. You stare at it for too long, then roll over.
Simonâs awake, though his eyes remain closed and body still. You wince, thighs rubbing together and interlacing your limbs over his. His lip twitches, but he doesnât shove you off.
You trace a scar jutting across the meat of a shoulder and stare at his chest, pock-marked like besieged castle walls. Months ago, you asked about the stories behind the wounds. The question went unanswered, and it earned you a week of getting fucked face-down. So you simply drop a kiss to a crater on his pec and then his chin.
âYou broken?â He mutters.
âNo.â
âThen fix us some breakfast.âÂ
Itâs Herculean with how your flanks and thighs protest, but you hum through the kitchen and diligently rustle up the meal. Visions of a life dance through your head. An ivory lace curtain will suit the window over the sink. The smoke-damaged, yellowing cabinets need scrubbing. Thereâs hair stuck in the hoarfrost of the freezer, which makes you gag. Leftovers from one of Simonâs hunts.
No sooner than you plate the bacon does Simon emerge. No need to call. Heâs trained.Â
~~
The cell reception is terrible, one of the features that sold him on the property. Calls drop sporadically, and texts scrape by at the shed. His phone vibrates when he sets foot over the thresholdâmessages from his pet, all sent within a few hours. Poor thingâs bored at work. He wouldnât know the feeling. His morningâs been productive. Enjoyable.
Simonâs lip curls, and he leans the fishing rod against the shed door. Sliding his phone into a pocket, he turns back to fetch the tackle box. He lumbers past the wriggling cunt strung up on the newly installed gambrel, the plastic crinkling underfoot. The steady drip of blood is barely audible over their whiny throes. Probably hurts. Hooks through the Achilles tendons will do that, but theyâll go quiet soon enough. If he times it right, theyâll be done when he returns for supper.
He nearly pricks his thumb, spearing the worm onto the hook. Watches it writhe. He huffs a laugh and spares a glance back at the cabin. The two trees that once held the beam. Itâs a loss to no longer watch game struggle from the comfort of the deck. He surprised himself with how he complied with his girlâs request. She earned it, he supposed. Cried and begged and bled for it. Usually, that sort of response draws his knife, not his interest. But sheâs an odd one. Different. A rare beast.
He casts the line.
âDo you want to fuck me?â Sheâd asked all those months ago, less than a minute after he threatened to hang her date by the balls. Blunt and to the point. Refreshing. He was unaccustomed to finding them so willing, but she fucking imprinted on him like a wobbly-kneed fawn. Nosed his open, reaching hand like a stray, hungry pup. She saw him for what he wasâthe bigger, meaner predator. Top of the food chain. Thinks some part of her knew she was better off bowing her head and licking his cock than running. She stuck her neck out, took him home, and gave him her pussy without a fuss.
Itâs cute, the way she thinks sheâs made him agreeable. How she works on him and his hygiene and manners. Doesnât get that if it were up to him, heâd sleep on the floor, in the dirt, used to a lifetime of bunking down in shitholes. The cabinâs simply suitable for his hobbies. The fact itâs a decent vivarium for the sweet girl is a bonus, a place to keep her nice and soft so long as sheâs good. âCourse, the sight of her hanging by her hands made the idea of introducing her insides to the outside cross his mind, but he wonât cut her down just yet. Not when heâs got her leashed.
Hours later, the cooler packed with largemouth bass and walleye, he unpacks the dinghy and trudges toward the shed. Itâs silent, save for the insects and the birds.
The nosy prick from the bait shop sways, unmoving. Coated with his own fluids and dripping. He chuckles. He should call her.
Simon thought it was already hard to understand him....
i feel like simon loses it when you murmur, âlike this?â every time you ride him.
itâs not even the first time that youâve ridden himâand he sure as hell would make sure that it wouldnât be the lastâbut thereâs always something so sweet at the shy curl of your question, your watery eyes peering up at him like simon isnât ravenous for every inch of you; your scent, your taste, your touchâheâs hungry for everything that you are.
so when you ask himâ
like this? timid and achingly soft;
like this? heart stutteringly quiet and meek;
like this? overwhelmingly intoxicatingâ
simon buckles and wraps his arms around you because, âyeah,â simon replies, voice rumbling in a ragged rasp. âjusâ like that, love.â
his cock twitches, pulsing, and he has to bite down at the inside of his lip to stop himself from reaching his euphoria. itâs too soon, almost embarrassingly so, but he canât help himself. itâs like your meek question is a trigger for him, unravelling his body until he feels like he is left as mere threads of his ecstasy, stroked to its tipping completion.
yeah, simon repeats to himself, his thick hands planted on the fat of your ass, squeezing greedily, before hoisting you up to feel the delicious press of your walls drag along his cock. it is such an enveloping warmth; all feverish and soft.
how could you even ask him anything like he isnât being unmade?
you hiccup, breathy and hitching, as you curl close to him. simon chuckles.
âthatâs right,â he says, fucking you back down his length. âsâgood, huh?â
all he gets is that familiar thrum of your muffled hum, and simon coos because he knows heâs hit that threshold that renders you nonverbal.
see? such a sweetheart for him.
the ghosts of the past were the only thing that truly scared the ghost, the man who if someone'd seen him walking towards them from across the street at night, they would've started calling the first helpline number available and saying their prayers, even if they weren't believers .
in truth, ghost wasn't a troubled man, he barely was what was left of one, simon.
ghost wasn't a troubled man, but he was all that was left of one. every time the thick balaclava slipped on simons face, he'd turn off the few emotions that were still left in his body, mind running on autopilot as he coldly shut off his scarred heart. simon needed that, both a relief and a way to turn everything off, he needed to know it wasnt him killing people. it made his heart rest better to know it was ghost, not simon.
simon, who'd gone through hell and back, watching his friends, honourable soldiers, fall by the hand of a simple yet fatal mistake.
simon, whose family was slaughtered and he felt so helpless and unworthy, because why join the military and train to fight when he couldn't even protect his three years old nephew?
feeling so low he could barely keep his brown eyes open, he didn't think he was a man who deserved to live. why, when nobody was there to live with him? sure, johnny and kyle could try to cheer him up and distract him as much as they wanted, but they couldn't follow simon to his flat by the railways, in front of the man united stadium. price regularly called him: every other day to check up on him, ask him if he fancied a pint. simon rarely said yes, but he was grateful price didn't forget about him the moment they left base, it made him feel like he was, after all, someone. more than once even kyle booked a cheap hotel room near simon's place so he could spend time with him. forcing him to go outside and meet up with him and price. sometimes even johnny could make it, hopping on the first train from glasgow to see his lieutenant.
simon studied the pub. ironically, kyle always decided to drag him to the pub where simon spent his late teens with his mates from the time. that was, of course, before simon turned eighteen, and without speaking a word to anyone, left to join the military a week after his birthday. when he'd first come back, almost a year later, all his friends had either moved out of manchester or thought he'd moved out too, cutting off contacts. it was a shock for the few ones left to see his dog tags underneath his shirt when he first showed up again.
it was meaningless.
he was meaningless. flesh on bone, a heart pumping his veins full of life without him being able to stop it.
simons complete view of life was of suffocating suffering, a meaningless amount of time he had to spend on this earth for what he used to believe was for a greater good. there was not such a thing, simon was sure of it now, a bottle of beer in his left hand as his right one brought his cigarette to his chapped, pale lips. he looked down the river irwin, the city noise muffled out by the quiet and calm chatter of people walking past him. he felt almost envious. they had someone to talk to.
but he'd never been the loquacious type either, tommy always did the talking, simon usually dragging both of their arses out of the messes tommy brought them in. that's how it worked, their dynamic. his brother talked, too much sometimes, even for him, and he made sure nothing happened, as easy as that. simon was the one who stepped in when things got bad, in any situation: outside of the pub with a drunk man that tommy'd pissed off with his witty remarks, older boys at school when they were children, or at home, with their father. needless to say, simon got the most of the beatings, scars adorning the skin of his back even before stepping on the field. the cigarette burns on his arms and legs itched every time he'd think too much about it.
ever since finding his brothers corpse on the stairs of his own home, front door unlocked, his wife and son dead on the master bedroom's bed, he'd been craving what it felt like to love someone again. he craved loving someone, craved the feeling of something so strong it would change every fiber of his being, that would alter the chemistry of his brain. it was almost visceral, the need he had to satisfy. he despised everything good there was in life, anything that should bring happiness bothered him, but he was still a human being, and being human meant longing for someone else, another half.
throwing the cigarette butt in the river, he turned around, not ready to be home in less than fifteen minutes. the feeling of getting swallowed in the darkness and silence of his own home made him almost paranoid, he was driving himself crazy. simon would have chosen to throw himself in the river if given the choice to pick between that and going home, but the early rays of the dawn started blinding him, and the shadows under his eyes were becoming darker by the second. maybe he'd take a longer route.
simons restless nights became quickly part of his life, following him everywhere around the globe during the years. he found in the lack of sleep a way to control his life, he desperately needed control. when all was to shambles, control was all he needed. sleep, exercise, food, sex, attitude and performance were things he could control, and the less he let himself slip into, the more in control his tired body felt.
"five hours of bad sleep every two days won't keep you alive." price'd told him, and simon groaned.
"good then."
"we need you alive, simon."
"ya need a soldier, not me."
"we need you, simon." price insisted, shaking his head. "you're a good man, we need you."
"i'm not a good man."
until his seventh year of mourning, simon never thought he would find peace of mind, but he found it coming along with spring's sweet scented flowers and chilly breezes; you.
Brain rotten by the idea of topping the cod men.
Personnaly I'm a super soft dom and heavily into body worship and praise... so just imagining doing that to this people have me vibrating with want.
Could you imagine forcing this guys to look you in the eyes when you praise them ? Being kissed everywhere, touched with so much care and want and yearning ? You can tell its almost too intimate and uncomfortable for them (I'm thinking ghost in particular here) to see so much devotion in your eyes. To have you making them acknowledge it. To force them to see your truth. That they are lovely. Wanted. Worshipped.
What about praise ? I'm so sure soap should love that. Love being told what's good. How. Specifically. Getting lost in the praised, in the poetry you slur into his neck after bitting him because kissing isn't enough anymore you want him so bad you want to consume him.
And the after care ??? Imagine holding gaz, making him feel safe. Loved. Imaging becoming a safe space. Somewhere so precious and kind he can just let go. Somewhere he feel seen and accepted and loved and respected and cared about.
Yeah. Hope my brainstorms make yours vibe with that idea.
Also I'm heavily into orgasm denial so that too lol
Love it when doms are in my inbox, yes welcome, thank you for blessing me with this. Allow me to continue dominating these men (plus Price and König) under the cut
Ghost absolutely melts for a soft dom, you cannot convince me otherwise. He'd be good at taking punishments, a hard dom would provide a very different release for him, but I am a service switch so I am always going to want to absolutely overstimulate this man. Make him look you in the eyes while you jerk him off, cooing all sorts of sweet praise, squeezing hard every time he looks away or closes his eyes. Making sure he knows he isn't allowed to move or speak unless asked to, and then just lavishing attention onto him. He'd be brain dead in minutes, absolutely drunk on affection.
If you wanted to go the hard dom route he can take a few smacks, it just makes his breathing harder, makes him inch a little closer to breaking and fucking you into the floor. It's a good method for testing his limits, he likes knowing that you can push him right to the edge and keep him there, likes knowing he has control over himself to such a degree. I think Ghost gets off on knowing he did something correctly, he likes making his partner come because that means he did something right, and doing something right is the same as doing something good in his mind. That's why you'll never catch Simon Riley being a brat, the man needs to stay in the lines you/he have drawn so that he feels like he's in control. He's a pleasure to use, and I personally love that for him.
Soap is a fucking brat. I mean, the man has absolute switch energy but what is a dom if not a brat that gets what they want? Soap is also a fucking DOG. He will pull on the leash but as soon as you have your hands on him he's whining and begging for more. Hit him with a "What a polite mutt you are when I do x" and he'll whine about wanting to be a brat "but it feels too good." You have to bite him because after a certain point he's sinking his teeth into you. He needs something to hold onto, something to ground on, and that means biting, lots of biting. You can't ask him to beg, that just brings the brat out, unless you want a reason to punish him.
I am firmly on the Soap is a masochist train. He loves it, smack him hard across the face and he'll purr for you. The flip side of this is that masochists are almost always sadists too, they love pain so why wouldn't they do that to you? Soap needs a firm hand, needs someone pushing his head down and stepping on his cock, he's thrilled, he's drooling. After care is a must with this one, he'll be the most docile you'll ever see him, he will ask you to cockwarm him.
Gaz. Ooooh I fucking adore Gaz, come here baby I just wanna kiss all over your face. All praise. All body worship. Overstimulate him and make sure he's firing blanks, if you let him come at all. Strikes me as the sort of sub that wants it to be drawn out. Ride him until he's begging then pull off, make him watch you play with yourself until you start fucking him again. He loves the denial aspect of it, loves knowing that you're getting off even if he isn't. He's the type of guy to rut against the bed while he's giving you oral, happy to come in his pants after your third orgasm. Gaz would absolutely benefit from a soft dom, creating that space where he can just let go and stop being for a while would be so wonderful for him.
He'd likely be into some lowkey public play. Nicknames said with a little too much deference, coming up and hugging you from behind just so no one can see how hard he is when you tell him "good job out there, Sergeant." Always touchy with you, always cuddled up to you when you're on the couch. Lay on top of him like a weighted blanket he loves it. Aftercare is always top notch because it's just more babying and taking care of Gaz. He'll drag you off for a shower or a bath and just doze with you while you clean up. Do not ask him any questions for at least an hour, the man is gone.
Price.... He'll let you think you're in charge as long as he thinks it's fun. You have to know his lines really well in order to avoid them. He won't dip into sub space or anything like that, but he understands the release that comes with domming and if that's what you need he'll do it. You know those people who are so submissive they're willing to dom if their partner asks them, that's Price but the opposite. He's dominant to a degree that he is willing to direct you through topping him because he knows you need it. You can fuck him, he's absolutely having a great time, but watch out. Praise works better than degradation for him, I think if you were ever to tip him towards being truly submissive you'd have to be jerking him off, whispering praise in his ear. He'd rest his head against your shoulder and shudder when you squeeze his cock.
You can get him most of the way there, but the man is hard wired to look after people. Miscalculate or degrade him too far and he'll flip the script. You'll be the one begging if you're not careful. It's a very sophisticated game you two play, but if you're having a bad day, you can take it out on him.
König is a lot like Price. He's hard wired to be alert, so slipping him into that soft fuzzy space is hard. The best, and I mean best, way to do it is to get him absolutely fuck-drunk. Make him lose his damn mind because it all feels too good, he will be mush. Brain fried. You just gotta get him there. Lots of overstimulation or lots and lots of edging. I think König is the king(lol) of edging. I have no reason to believe this, except I think he edges if he's going into the field... really ups his aggression and makes him think less about the atrocities he commits. He'll lay on the bed and edge himself while you kiss him and whisper praises to him. He will beg for you to fuck him, will beg to be inside you, will beg for you to give him the word so he can come. He's an animal, and you should treat him like one.
The problem is that he's unpredictable once he's actually inside you(if that's what you decide on). He might keep listening to you. He also might growl for you to shut up and force a hand over your mouth, or your face into the pillows so he can fuck you how he likes without listening to you try to dominate him. He's going to take what he wants, and the only thing he'll listen to at that point is a safe word. Another masochist... please hurt him, he's begging for blood. Dangerous because again... the masochism does bleed(haha) into sadism for him. He loves pain, you should love it too... He wants to hurt you, but no more than you deserve(or ask for). Watch the lines you push with him.
i love men who look like theyve been through some of the most horrendous shit ever sorry
god DAMN
underrated threesome dynamic of herding dog x lamb x wolf
àŹ(à©*Ëá”Ë)à©* à©âĄâ§âË
two weeks after your second anniversary was when john decided to first break the news to you.
he's a man, he'd told you. always had been, just didn't know how to articulate that until right at that moment. he wanted to transition, to take testosterone, cut his hair, change his name, the works. he'd looked so, so nervous, holding your hand so gently, like he was afraid he might crush your knuckles if he held on as tightly as he wanted to.
just tell me what you need, i'm not going anywhere. you'd said, and he pulled you into his arms and cried into your hair. you meant it, too. you'd cut his hair for him, giving him a smart looking crew cut, and taken him to all of his appointments. new clothes were bought, elderly relatives were spoken to and given boundaries, the works. it was an honor to do it, to be john's support as he ventured into the unknown, traversing new and uncharted waters.
you'd had the absolute privilege of having a front row seat to the transformation of john price. the good, the emotional, all of it. every new step in the process was an adventure, a thrill. the nervous joy about getting the initial consultations set up with the right people. his barely restrained excitement over the patchiest peach fuzz you'd ever seen in your life. the voice memos to himself, recording the changes in his voice and comparing them on occasion. the mood swings, the acne, the bulking up. buying binders, and burning one in celebration a few years later when he no longer needed them, pink crescent-shaped scars adorning his chest. watching the scars get completely covered by thick body hair that covers almost every inch of him. watching him watch himself in the mirror, and seeing the smile at his reflection grow more and more over time.
it's incredible how much his confidence grew, how much more self-assured he felt. the first time someone called him 'sir' at a supermarket he'd rushed home to tell you about it, grinning so wide you thought it might split his face in half. gender euphoria, he'd called it, and you can see why. every time he felt it, whether it was looking good in a shirt post-surgery, getting consistently gendered correctly by strangers, or noticing that the dents in his shoulders from where his bra straps had been were slowly disappearing thanks to the growth of his muscles, the joy he experienced leaked out of the heart of him, dripping onto the floor and flooding the room with it. his happiness, his bone-deep contentment, his elation is infectious, and you're happy to catch it time and time again.
and now here he is, years later, still by your side. a husband this time, not a girlfriend like when you'd started out. the role suits him beautifully, if you're honest. much better than girlfriend ever did. the thought strikes you as you watch him do the dishes, and you can't help but admire the change in him. his beard is a matter of pride, thick and well-groomed, his chest, arms, back, hell, everything, is covered in a thick layer of hair as well. his shoulders are broader, his voice deeper, and his face is more angular. it's nothing short of incredible to watch him become the person he was always meant to be, and a feeling of immense love and pride wells up inside of you, borderline overwhelming.
you stand right next to him, silently wrapping your arm around his waist and kissing his shoulder through his shirt as he rinses a plate from lunch. you can't make the words come out, how much you love him, how much his joy brings you joy, how fucking good he looks, how sexy you think he is, how proud you are of how far he's come. instead you say nothing, opting instead to keep peppering his shoulder with pecks and squeezing his waist, hoping that might get the point across. john just throws you a curious, chuckling smile, right before he gently rests his socked foot on top of yours. no pressure, just resting, his way of holding your hand when his hands are busy. you both stand there for a while in a comfortable quiet, just enjoying being next to each other. john's someone whose company you'll never tire of, never not want desperately. even when you're tired of people and need some time alone, that doesn't include him. john isn't 'people', he's john. the glowing, perfect, singular exception to the rule. and you lucky, lucky thing- he's all yours, according to the rings on your fingers.
"you're so easy to love." you blurt out as john puts the last dish in the drying rack. he grins down at you, the smile crinkling the corners of his eyes.
"so are you, sweetheart." he says, deep voice rumbling, finally wrapping an arm around your big hips and holding you close as you both look out the kitchen window together, watching the birds at the feeder for a while as you soak up each other's company in companionable silence as his foot continues to rest gently on yours.