I just spend 45 minutes on Microsoft Excel charting and colour coordinating Elrond’s family line. All this was to mathematically prove that he is not halfelven. Elrond is, in fact, 56.25% Elven. Here is my chart.
I made a lot of Tolkien related playlists on spotify during the last year to organise my music library, if anyone is interested here they are:
The Legendarium
From the Ainulindalë to the War of Wrath, with an extra mention of the Dagor Dagorath at the end to close the narrative (events in chronological order, mostly metal with some acoustic and ambient pieces)
Second and Third Age, from Numenor to the events of The Hobbit to the full lotr storyline (events in chronological order, mostly metal with some acoustic and ambient pieces)
From the Ainulindalë to the end of the Third Age (events in chronological order, instrumental classical and acoustic music only, including the movies soundtrack)
One Playlist To Rule Them All: a selection of my favourite Tolkien astists on spotify (mostly metal, tracks sorted by artist)
Chill Roadtrip AU: small selection of Tolkien themed chillhop and downtempo
Characters
Eärendil: mostly ambient metal and some acoustic tracks to journey through the stars
Thingol and Melian: Doriath ambient playlist, with some medieval and acoustic tracks, enchanted forest and fae court vibes
Aragorn: acoustic and metal songs for reclaimed kingdoms and long distance love stories
Tar-Miriel: slow and haunted vibes for the Downfall of Numenor, water and drowning themes
Legolas: soft acoustic and folk tracks, relaxing and nature themed with some sea longing vibes
Maglor: metal and acoustic songs for the poorest little meow meow
Fëanor: power metal only for the Spirit of Fire himself
Sauron: mainly black metal, playlist for evil necromancers only
Vibes only
Not strictly Tolkien related lyrics but if you need more vibes I can offer you these playlists:
Cuiviénen: ambient metal to wander under the starry skies
Dreamless Sleep: lullabies for the enchanted forest
Lugbúrz Lo-Fi: dungeon synth ambience for your tower dwellings
Mordor Metalfest: black metal for your evil festival needs
The Party goes on a Roadtrip: epic metal for your epic quest
Sword and Sorcery: ultra epic metal for your ultra epic quest
Songs of Enchantment: soft acoustic folk and fantasy songs to sing in a field
Look sometimes I just so much want to write fairytale story involving faded Maglor haunting little remote villages in the East
Like, mortal men at the East seashores had this tale of beautiful sad singing voice near the sea
But this voice was not the evil voices that lured you into danger
This voice guided you to safety
If you swim too far away in the sea and got swiped away by the waves sometimes this voice came to you and suddenly the waves released you and allowed you to go back to the shore
There were fishermen and sailors swore that they only found their way home alive in some heavy storms due to a strange singing voice
Orphans and children left alone at home sometimes heard lullaby on the nights they could not sleep
Occasionally when someone got really sick beyond help people took them to some places near the ocean and sometimes they got better like a miracle. Even in the case they still die they died peacefully with little suffer. They said there was a voice there singing illness and pain away.
There were tales about people being chased by orcs near the ocean, then they heard songs and somehow the orcs could not see them anymore and ran directly into the sea and drowned
There was this village got attacked at night (sometimes armies of orcs took whole villages of people away and nobody knew where they went), and a voice warned people in their dreams, and those who followed the voice was lead away from the orcs, which was supposed to be impossible, they were surrounded from all directions
Sometimes when you walked along the shoreline you could hear songs of a beautiful language you could not recognize. It was so sad and but it was also extremely beautiful. In this East land there was little hope but those who heard the hopeless song somehow had a little bit of hope again. If something so beautiful like this existed, then the dark king of the world might not be all powerful. There were things beyond their reach.
There were people who tried to talk to the voice. “Who are you? Why are you here? What are you singing about? Do you have a home? Why are you so sad?”
But the voice never replied.
Along the ocean people prayed. Yes in many areas they were required to pray to the King of the World, but how can you sincerely worship the Lord of All that sent monsters to take away your children and turn their into monsters? If there were other gods who were good and kind, how could these gods allow their life to be this way? If there were gods they were enslaved by one and abandoned by the others.
But people still pray to things, to the ocean to the land to the sky to the stars above, like a child in dark night cry for a mother even when their mother was dead or taken away.
Some people prayed to the voice too.
Some people prayed for the voice.
—————
(I love the idea of Maglor being dragged back home but I also love the idea of Maglor gradually finding peace in his self-exile and helping people he did not know and somehow kept being adopted by local mortal kids even when he no longer had a body)
(There is just so much peak aesthetic in “beautiful regretful voice lingering by the sea”)
Okay. This is what happened. This is canon, there have been unreliable narrators before and no one can prove me wrong. Tolkien estate can eat my entire ass.
Legolas and Gimli are living life in middle earth until Gimil is ready to pass on and Legolas starts building a boat.
This is the first time the redneck backwoods prince has ever had to fabricate something. He's never crafted a functional object in his entire life and Gimli, from an entire race of fanatical craftsman, watches his elf get into a leaky bathtub and nearly drown in 3 feet of water. In a pond.
Gimli goes, yeah, okay, I guess I can take up another hobby and becomes the first, last, and only dwarven shipwright ever. The boat he makes is the world's first, last, and only Ironside, and it looks like a seige engine. Legolas helps and stands around looking pretty and does a lot of explaining when they show up in Valinor to dock with all the pretty elven sloops in the Khazad-dûm II.
the title of the last song you listened to is the epitaph on your tombstone
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