Latest Posts by everyone-needs-to-dream - Page 6

pre-reveal but one of the justice leaguers give Captain Marvel a toy as a joke Christmas present but instead of laughing Marvel just bursts into tears bc its been years since he last had a toy and hes a kid dammit.

Billy Batson Gets Adopted AU, but the adopter he’s avidly avoiding is Lex Luthor.

When Lex first heard of Captain Marvel, he was… unenthused, to put it lightly. Another Kryptonian? It was bad enough when that second one, “Supergirl” had entered the superhero stage; Lex had few hopes for the appearance of a third. Superman even paid Fawcett a visit, and Lex’s grim worries were all but sealed. Except… he started hearing rumors. Different rumors, of the world’s “Mightiest Mortal”. Of a man, human and magic and power, who could stand up against Superman and maybe come out on top. A match. A defense. A man Lex most certainly wanted on his side.

Which turned out to be difficult, since Marvel was impossible to get ahold of. He was nowhere. Sure, he showed up to every disaster, every moment of peril and sign of distress, but he never stayed. He was there precisely long enough to get the job done, and not a second later. It was irritating. It was infuriating. It was giving Lex a migraine. Even Batman, you could occasionally catch at crime scenes or flag down on the rooftops of Gotham, not that Lex had ever tried—Gotham was a beast best avoided. But Marvel? Nothing. At least when he was battling his rogues gallery you could see him flying through the streets, but on his off time? It was like the man stopped existing. Lex Corp’s agents couldn’t find hide of hair of him. The man didn’t respond to public requests for contact, nor any of the more discreet methods Lex and employed. It was astounding. And Lex did not like astounding. He liked answers, and he liked aces in his pocket, and neither of those things would matter if he couldn’t get the Big Red Cheese to talk to him. So he sent Mercy to investigate. To either get Marvel on their side, or get the idiot to speak to them. Mercy marched into his office two weeks later with no contact point, no progress, and a video. a video of a man, a flash of lightning, and then a small, malnourished child.

“Ah,” Lex thought. “Ah.”

So. Captain Marvel was an orphaned, homeless ten year old with inexplicable powers and absolutely zero support system.

Lex was going to steal him.

Steal wasn’t quite the right word, since everything Lex was doing would be completely legal and above-board. Unorthodox, sure, but he had far more than enough money to make it happen in a way that even Big Blue couldn’t dispute. An application, some pressure and a few favors, and suddenly Lex Luthor was a registered foster parent. Now all he needed to do was find the child and ensure he ended up in his care

Billy doesn’t know what the hell is going on or why Lex Corp is suddenly flooding the streets of Fawcett, but he figures this is as good an excuse as any to punch a billionaire in the face

Que several thousand words of Kevin McAllister level evasion tactics, tomfuckery, stranger danger, weaponized baby face, (attempted) manipulation, a very confused and concerned League, telling Superman to fuck off for wildly different reasons, identity shenanigans, and the slow, begrudging mutual understanding and sort-of respect that Billy and Lex are furious is happening

(Luthor and Billy are locked in a battle of wills and guile while the League stands there like “is Luthor… trying to kidnap a child?? Marvel, are you doing anything about this?? We can help, this seems like a multiple hero situation—“ and Marvel is very nicely telling them to mind their own fucking business. They do not. Billy is mad at everyone except Cyborg, who let Billy know he was coming to Fawcett ahead of time)

My contribution to the ‘Billy Batson and the Batfam’s Legally Binding Bonding’ bandwagon: Jason Todd adopts Billy.

Jason has just done something greatly impressive from a vigilante standpoint, but now every villain in Gotham is out for his blood even more than usual. So to lay low for a bit, he leaves town. Heads to a city with a very different atmosphere and criminal underworld to Gotham, where none of his enemies will think to look or have influence - Fawcett City. Maybe Roy is with him, because Jayroy makes everything better.

He parks his car in an alley one day. What does he see when he comes back? What does he see? A twelve-year-old homeless orphan boy with black hair and blue eyes hotwiring his fucking car.

He stares at Billy.

Billy stares back at the dreaded killer Red Hood.

It’s poetic. It’s fate. The stars have aligned. Lian gets an awesome older brother who’s also sometimes a magical adult superhero. Bruce is now officially a grandfather and proud beyond measure, and though horrified to learn his Justice League teammate of two years is a child, relieved to know he’s at least now got a good support system. Billy, for his part, is himself aghast to discover the Goddamn Batman is that idiotic celebrity billionaire guy. Dick, Duke and Steph get along with him like wildfire. Damian’s somewhat jealous of no longer being the youngest in the family, but warms up to Billy and is protective of him, being reminded of Jon.

And all those villains? They can say hello to Captain Marvel.

UPDATE: the first chapter of the official fic is up!

Y’know how big dogs aren’t used to being big so they try to sit where they could when they were puppies? Yeah.

Shazam would have absolutely atrocious personal space problems. He’s so used to being a 5’4, 90lb 12 year old that when he sits down he has no clue at all where his body is, his muscles have muscles and ten minutes ago they were string beans. He’d assume that small spaces can hold his absolutely gigantic shoulders and the only thing that stops him from cramming himself in itty bitty little corners at all hours is the wisdom of Solomon in his head spraying him with a water bottle and shouting, “No!!! Down boy!!! Too big!!!!”

Shazams got some strange villains

Shazam: Not that I want more villains in the world but damn I wish some of mine would just, I don’t know, rob a bank or have a silly gimmick or something! Like geez. 

Shazam: All of my villains want me dead or dissected! Just once I would like to stop a guy in a colourful costume with an silly name from stealing an artifact related to their gimmick.

The justice league: …………………

Shazam: And banter! I would kill to have some playful banter with my villains but none of them understand my references! They’re all either demons, aliens, old as balls or all three!! IT SUCKS!

The Justice League:……………….

Shazam: THEY THINK VINE IS JUST A PLANT!!!!!

Superman: Wait wait wait, what’s vine if not a plant???

Shazam: I didn’t even do anything to them they just hate me just because I exist or because of my proximity to the guy who gave me powers! I had no control over that!!

Shazam: If I got a list of terms and conditions that said accepting may result in literal demons that want to eat me and the guy who had the job first doing his best to see my head separated from my shoulders I might have reconsidered!!

Flash: Wait really???

Shazam: eh probably not, I can eat bullets now its pretty sick.

Shazam: Even if there were a list of terms and conditions I wouldn’t have read it lmao.

Batman: …Captain, did you not get a choice in your powers?

Zatanna: Hold on did you say demons are trying to EAT YOU?!?!?!

IMAGINE AN AU WHERE THOMAS AND MARTHA COME BACK TO LIFE??? No magic explains it. No science CAN.

Tim is wrecking his brains trying to find a logical, sane reason as to why his dead grandparents (who aren't dead - for the time being) are currently sitting in the living room, eating Alfred's cookies, and looking around for Bruce

" Chum?! Chum! It's dad! Come here! Who's this in our living room?"

" Bruce! Mommy's home! I'm sorry for being gone for so long, but that movie was just so long, I-"

Tim freezes. They think Bruce is still eight.

And Bruce walks in; drawn by the noise and Alfred's attempts to sit the pair down.

More wound than man, drowning in a dark shirt and sweatpants, eyes punched purple and dark red and bruised to hell and back;

His arm is broken, his leg too, and Tim knows for a fact he shouldn't be walking around with those five broken ribs. But God, - he's never seen his dad look so tiny before; So glassy-eyed and shaken.

For the love of all that's holy let Martha Wayne gently frame Bruce's face with her hands and stare at him, dusting off time with her eyes, and let Thomas do the same.

"...Mama?"

" ...BRUCE?!"

LET THOMAS AND MARTHA BE PROTECTIVE AS FUCK OVER THEIR SON! LET THEM MEET THEIR GRANDKIDS! Let Thomas " Catch These Hands" Wayne and Jason " Catch This Murder" Todd BOND.

" Look, I know what you're going to say, Gramps. I shouldn't blame dad for not wanting to kill Joker,"

" Yes, but that's behind us, big guy"

" And that murder isn't the answer and that I should just move on, but,-"

" Oh, no! That guy's a monster and we need to put him down. What's his address?"

GIVE ME BRUCE AND MARTHA PLAYING PIANO TOGETHER WHILE CASS FORCES DAMIAN INTO A DANCE WITH HER! GIVE ME MARTHA MAKING DICK BLUSH BY ASKING ABOUT " this pretty Kori girl in your phone"

Most importantly, give me Thomas and Martha Wayne trying to convince Bruce to give up Batman. Thomas says it'd be an easy enough job, someone else can do it! Bruce pouts, " Try doing it, then"

Thomas almost breaks his back by pretending to be Batman for like a night and becomes the new meme of Gotham when he steals a shotgun from Alfred and just patrols with it

IMAGINE AN AU WHERE THOMAS AND MARTHA COME BACK TO LIFE??? No magic explains it. No science CAN.

Tim is wrecking his brains trying to find a logical, sane reason as to why his dead grandparents (who aren't dead - for the time being) are currently sitting in the living room, eating Alfred's cookies, and looking around for Bruce

" Chum?! Chum! It's dad! Come here! Who's this in our living room?"

" Bruce! Mommy's home! I'm sorry for being gone for so long, but that movie was just so long, I-"

Tim freezes. They think Bruce is still eight.

And Bruce walks in; drawn by the noise and Alfred's attempts to sit the pair down.

More wound than man, drowning in a dark shirt and sweatpants, eyes punched purple and dark red and bruised to hell and back;

His arm is broken, his leg too, and Tim knows for a fact he shouldn't be walking around with those five broken ribs. But God, - he's never seen his dad look so tiny before; So glassy-eyed and shaken.

For the love of all that's holy let Martha Wayne gently frame Bruce's face with her hands and stare at him, dusting off time with her eyes, and let Thomas do the same.

"...Mama?"

" ...BRUCE?!"

LET THOMAS AND MARTHA BE PROTECTIVE AS FUCK OVER THEIR SON! LET THEM MEET THEIR GRANDKIDS! Let Thomas " Catch These Hands" Wayne and Jason " Catch This Murder" Todd BOND.

" Look, I know what you're going to say, Gramps. I shouldn't blame dad for not wanting to kill Joker,"

" Yes, but that's behind us, big guy"

" And that murder isn't the answer and that I should just move on, but,-"

" Oh, no! That guy's a monster and we need to put him down. What's his address?"

GIVE ME BRUCE AND MARTHA PLAYING PIANO TOGETHER WHILE CASS FORCES DAMIAN INTO A DANCE WITH HER! GIVE ME MARTHA MAKING DICK BLUSH BY ASKING ABOUT " this pretty Kori girl in your phone"

Most importantly, give me Thomas and Martha Wayne trying to convince Bruce to give up Batman. Thomas says it'd be an easy enough job, someone else can do it! Bruce pouts, " Try doing it, then"

Thomas almost breaks his back by pretending to be Batman for like a night and becomes the new meme of Gotham when he steals a shotgun from Alfred and just patrols with it

had this vision of Batman full-naming his kids, but he has to preserve the secret identities

Reformed Gotham Villains TV Show Idea: Ex-Rogues (One Hell of a Long Post!)

Credit to @iceberg-lounge-staffmeme for the original premise: Oswald Cobblepot has gone straight along with some other Gotham rogues he’s hired in the now legitimate Iceberg Lounge, all of whom are social pariahs.

I’m expanding on this to say that several of the city’s ‘A-list’ supervillains are rehabilitated. This was made possible partly by Bruce Wayne’s donations to Arkham making the institution a productive rehabilitation centre (I know, unbelievable), and him bettering the city in general. Every ex-rogue goes to therapy. They all have PTSD if not C-PTSD due to their tragic backstories, something that happened while they were rogues or both, and some have other disorders beside. Realistic mental illness representation! Relapses will probably occur, but they will be portrayed as natural and fixable and no one will return to evil. They’re just trying to keep their and their friends’ lives safe, stable and free from costumed drama of any morality. However, their crimes are forgiven by a select few and forgotten by none. And this is Gotham - there’s always drama. The most infamous villains leaving the scene has opened the door to both more obscure and brand new villains’ ascensions. Don’t you think that would be cool? A break from the same old Gotham rogues featured again and again in adaptations? New characters with their own backstories and themes? ‘Cause I think it has great potential.

The show shifts from a relatively lighthearted and episodic but nonetheless adult sitcom to increasingly complex and serialized as we see more aspects of the protagonists, their relationships evolve and they get roped into more and more frontline hero/villain shenanigans.

The title card is ‘ROGUES’ being written in large, jagged, erratic, blood-red letters against a black background, a pause, and then ‘Ex-’ typed before it in much smaller, neat white standard font. I can picture a promotional image with the characters doing mundane tasks in the Iceberg Lounge’s lobby, but their shadows are their villainous selves.

Every main character has two leitmotifs: their normal one, and their villain identity’s that’s mostly restricted to flashbacks to that time, flashbacks even further back as foreshadowing and allusions and discussion of what they were like then now. If the villainous one is heard in the present, it means that part of their past is haunting them or even that they’re acting kinda similar. Unless the leitmotif rearranged triumphantly and heroically, in which case they’re applying a skill, tool, piece of information, etc. they only have because of their criminal activities for good.

The ex-rogues are a very close and protective group. Interpersonal relationships vary, but whether two individuals mesh that well or not they’ve overall got an unshakable solidarity and understanding. Once you’ve tried to kill each other enough, a certain tension leaves the relationship, you know? They’ve seen each other at their lowest points. They casually joke and tease themselves and one another about their supervillain identities and activities, which would be irritating at best and triggering at worst from anyone else. Through flashbacks we watch their dynamics evolve from enemies and rivals who happen to have a common enemy to a weird, messed up, weird found family. The Iceberg Lounge crew are the prime example of this, being the core cast. Yet possibly not Gotham’s weirdest and most messed up found family! *meaningful look at Batfam*

The timeline is left vague to avoid such difficult questions as “Wow, they must have racked up a massive body count in those decades of evil, can they seriously be allowed to live among normal people?”. I can already see the giant, meticulous blog posts and videos by fans who’ve attempted to pinpoint dates using tiny scattered details. This is a warning - I’ll preemptively salute your dedication, but the series will ideally be deliberately written to foil you. It operates on comic book time. I will tell you Harley, Ivy and Victor were the first to reform all in a relatively short timeframe (motivated by love or selflessness) and Oswald, Eddie, John and Waylon (motivated by cruelty and/or pride, and Waylon couldn’t make lasting progress until his regressive condition could be reversed) came later. Selina wound down from anti-villain to anti-hero to fully heroic gradually. Plus Nora has been in suspended animation for seven years, previously the same age as Victor. The Batfamily is Bruce as Batman; Dick as Nightwing; Barbara as Oracle; Jason as Red Hood (a violent, ostensibly aloof but ultimately reliable vigilante rather than a crime lord); Tim as Red Robin; Cass as Black Bat; Steph as Batgirl; a teenage Damian as Robin; and Duke as the Signal. The implication is you could be watching a parallel show about the Batfamily in this continuity every episode and there are many ‘crossover’ episodes with it.

Oswald is the group’s de factor leader and responsible ‘dad friend’, often the exasperated straight man. He operates the Iceberg Lounge, which has earned a reputation as a safe space for the marginalized, including former criminals and criminals of necessity. That’s a big demographic in Gotham. His intimate knowledge of the criminal hierarchy and network helps him discern who to trust and defend, and who will only mean trouble. It’s taken him years and profuse effort to convince Batman it isn’t a facade this time; now Batman and Oracle sporadically consult him for his underworld intel and brilliant strategic thinking when they’ve hit a complete dead end in a case. No matter what you need, he knows someone in the city who can provide it. You know how one of the canon Penguin’s most terrifying trademarks is, totally untraceably, manipulating the lives of anyone who offends, annoys or hurts his feelings, even in the smallest and most unintentional way, into ruin and a premature end? Now he does the good version of that. Did you flash him a genuine smile in school, make amiable small talk to him once? Do anything to make him feel like a person with worth? Boom! Debts paid, dream house, dream job, won the holiday you’ve always wanted, your favourite cafe opened right down the street, all equally untraceable. The same service is done for his surviving victims and victims’ families. Still creepy, but the way he sees it he’ll always be creepy - might as well use it to benefit others. He’s trying. He records a journal of acts of human kindness. The Iceberg’s Lounge is the ex-rogues’ favourite hangout, and frequently hosts their game and movie nights in his penthouse. With enough of the social validation he’s always yearned for, he’s much less temperamental and insecure. He donates a significant cut of his income to animal preservation charities and projects, especially bird-related ones, and is the doting owner of a flock of pigeons in a luxury enclosure. He dislikes being called the Penguin, it’s just the insult it was to him as a boy with extra shame. His friends may call him Ozzie.

Harvey Dent is the nightclub’s company lawyer. His services are also available for free to anyone who needs a lawyer, he continues to protest Gotham’s corrupt justice system and he gives legal advice to underprivileged and marginalized young people. He’s the same kind, just, honourable guy he is usually; the main changes are he finds it easier to healthily express and process anger and negotiate with and stand up to his alter. Bruce Wayne is his best friend, they hang out and collaborate a lot. He feels immense debt toward Bruce for standing by him through his fall and recovery. He and the rest (his alter included) have a deal that they’ll do their absolute best to stay out of legal trouble, and if they get into it and it isn’t their fault or at least not worth the punishment they’ll receive he’ll come to their defence. He’s an excellent orator and the group’s reliable moral compass. Two-Face is more relaxed and rational due to Harvey letting out a fairer portion of their anger. He still has a bad habit of property damage. A key catalyst for his improvement was therapy that respected him as an independent, redeemable personality instead of treating him like a disease to be eradicated. He’s cynical, standoffish, unfamiliar with vulnerability and has little filter, but despite his complaints about them he values his friends far more than himself. He dislikes Bruce in person, but is grateful to and admires him objectively, will tolerate him and would save his life if he had to. He and Harvey are actual friends. Borderline brothers eventually, although their tastes and attitudes continue to clash. Harvey doesn’t forgive Two-Face anything he’s done, neither does Two-Face ask forgiveness of anyone, but they understand each other in a way no one else can. Two-Face was born a protector alter. He slowly went off the deep end and became a persecutor, but that benevolent protective instinct has been salvaged. He feels constant, immeasurable self-loathing with his new conscience, but unable to harm his body for Harvey’s innocence releases it onto external targets and through non-physical self-destructive behaviour. Harvey feels a lot of guilt and shame himself and they both struggle with self-harm. They still flip a coin to make trivial decisions sometimes and fiddle with it when uneasy, but a regular heads and tails one. The scarred coin has been donated to Gotham Human History Museum’s Rogues’ Gallery (heh heh). It’s forbidden to them because it to them offers a moral dichotomy of choices, not merely a trivial one, therefore giving a 50% chance they’ll feel obligated to act immorally. They did get plastic surgery on their burn scars, but its main goal was to reduce the scars’ painfulness and inconvenience and the left side of their face remains permanently disfigured. Their left eye’s vision is better after surgeries, but not average.

Victor Fries creates decorations out of ice and frost for the Lounge and sells ice sculptures. When not in use, the freeze ray is stored in a hidden safe he alone knows the code to and Selina alone could open without it. He enjoys these jobs and they provide a decent income, but his passion is an aerial, enlarged version of his freeze ray he’s designing, the Ice Restoration Ray (IRR). He hopes it will be able to rebuild the crumbling polar ice caps and cool the warming atmosphere. This global concern is a notable departure from his past where he only cared about Nora and himself. Wayne Enterprises’s medical department is developing a cure for his wife’s terminal disease, Victor having willingly granted it her cryogenically preserved body. Bruce supports his project and has sworn to fund the finished design’s construction. Don’t let his unemotional exterior and detached mannerisms fool you, he’s a kindhearted romantic. He doesn’t mind being called Mr Freeze. Pronouncing Fries like the fried potato strips, on the other hand…

Selina Kyle is a waitress at the Lounge. She was never insane or sent to Arkham; has never killed (she quips she only ever hurt rich gits’ pride and Batman’s feelings); was a thief, didn’t rob anyone who couldn’t manage without the item and outright returned a couple things of particular sentimental value; and aided Batman and/or fought worse rogues on numerous occasions. All this and currently being Bruce Wayne’s girlfriend means there’s a palpable divide between her and the other ex-rogues. She doesn’t agree with ever being considered a villain, for starters. Her arc is navigating how her identity of so long was inextricably linked to her moral ambiguity and solitude. Who is Selina Kyle without selfishness as a defining trait? Without the exhilaration of crime and no definite commitment to any faction or type of relationship? A pretty fantastic person, it turns out. A person society could admire and respect. But the real ex-villains in her circle have society’s eternal condemnation, so what does that mean for their friendship? Should she leave them behind and prioritize her own advancement? The old her would have. But she ultimately decides to continue serving at the Lounge and spending time with the group because she loves them more than her reputation to the same snooty upper class she used to rob… and ‘cause she’s, barring her impulsive streak and milder thrill-seeking behaviour, the most levelheaded and practical ex-rogue after Oswald. And literally the only one who hasn’t been committed to an insane asylum. They need her.

Waylon Jones is a chef in the Lounge kitchen. Hey, you live poor and homeless as long as he has and have a heightened sense of smell, you develop an appreciation for food. He’s also desperate to distance himself from his infamous cannibalism, which he only did in his crocodilian mental state. His condition gives him green scaly skin, claws and pointed teeth that have made him a persecuted outcast his whole life, but its true nature is far worse than scaring those around him. It’s progressive, slowly consuming his mental processes and further mutating his features when left unchecked. His natural intelligence is average but was formerly reduced to stupid and almost totally animalistic. After reforming, Jonathon Crane invented a drug that keeps the progression at bay. He gives it to him free. Waylon resents his condition deeply. Losing his humanity and higher thought irreversibly is his worst fear. He may be poorly educated, but he’s very clever in a practical, unconventional way. He’s timid, unconfident and mistrustful around strangers and quick to get defensive, used to being perceived solely as a mindless beast or evil freak, and unconditionally loyal and loving to those he trusts. A job that keeps him out of the public eye is perfect. Brushing off his friends’ offers to find him somewhere to stay, he insists he’s fine in his shelter in the spacious underground caverns below the city. This is half because he doesn’t want to cause any more trouble in the society above he knows won’t ever accept him. The other half? Waylon is a champion of Gotham’s homeless population, of the forgotten and abandoned. His shelter is a haven for a community of them too. There have been countless forceful relocations of the homeless, and the police will need to get through him to try it again! He detests being called Killer Croc, but doesn’t have the energy to protest it and risk looking aggressive.

Pamela Isley runs an organization that replants trees, rewilds spaces and opposes deforestation. Her bond with plants makes it very successful, telling her precisely what the flora (and ecosystem by extension) in an area need. Bruce Wayne is the organization’s first and biggest benefactor. She lives in a flat near the Lounge with her girlfriend Harley. They’ve been dating since they were criminals. She doesn’t mind being called Poison Ivy, and happily accepts Ivy as a nickname.

Harleen Quinzel is a psychiatrist at Arkham Asylum again. She champions better mental healthcare and public destigmatization of mental illness. Well, they all do, but for them it’s more on the side. She’s slightly rankled to be called Harley Quinn - nobody’d called her that before the Joker, so she associates it strongly with him and her time as a criminal - except by her fellow ex-rogues and the Batfamily, who’ve followed her recovery and she can trust accept that part of her. I’ll call her Harley for convenience. She typically wears a ponytail, a compromise between her pre-insanity tight bun and villainous childish pigtails. Maybe with pink and blue streaks?

Jonathan Crane reversed his fear toxin to produce a new line of anxiety medication that he anonymously sells to Wayne Enterprises, getting the money with none of the credit. He chose this, aware nobody would ever trust a chemical compound ‘the Scarecrow’ made (please do not call him that, by the way). It has less dangerous side effects and better results than any previous medication. He has a mental health information and advice website too. As well as suffering from generalized anxiety disorder before he decided to master fear, and PTSD then and now from his childhood, his toxin attacks were responsible for many cases of anxiety disorders, phobias and PTSD. I mean, the initial idea behind the fear toxin was to show others how he felt all the time. So he really feels a need to give back to the mentally ill. A former teacher, he has a soft spot for children and is skilled at engaging with them.

Edward Nygma is an exceptionally skilled private detective. He also sometimes collaborates with the Bats, who he greatly respects. Prior to his current job he created a popular puzzle game app, a last hurrah for his obsession with games and riddles. He helped John set up his website. A doctor of computer science and nerd genius nerd extraordinaire not totally over his problem of equating his worth and intelligence, he most enjoys the company of his fellow intellectuals and kinda keeps himself to himself more, alternately awkward and reserved and defaulting to his cocky facade in social interaction with normal people. He’s still pretty lonely, not that he’ll admit it. He takes being referred to as the Riddler nonchalantly.

The Joker is dead. He died three years before the show begins. How exactly is never explained (letting you fill in whatever seems most apt to you, my personal headcanon is Alfred kills him) due to being ubiquitous knowledge, but it was very cathartic. The anniversary of his death is almost an unofficial civic holiday, nicknamed Joker Day. The ex-rogues have arranged to annually hold a mock funeral for him. They give comedic eulogies about how little they’ll miss their dearly despised and the countless ways he was an awful person, a different head speaker stepping forward each year in rotation, and bury a biodegradable dummy of him beneath a creatively hand-decorated plaque. The idea is to get it off their chest so the rest of the year they needn’t spare a thought to him. Having had to inhabit both Arkham and the Gotham underworld with him and know him personally, they have a wealth of stories. Harley’s always declined because the scumbag’s given her so much baggage she wasn’t ready to verbalize it before a bigger audience. The Season One episode “Joker Day” involves her volunteering to be head speaker of the fourth Joker Day. Suffice to say, it gets… emotionally intense. After deconstructing his whole character, paying her disrespects magnificently, explaining how her and them overcoming the worst in themselves to live well and happily is the ultimate insult to his memory with his obsession with nihilism and corruption, and knocking the dummy into the grave with her bat hard enough to decapitate it, Harley spots Batman on the rooftop above them, clapping along with her friends. She waves. “Batman! Why don’t you come down? I bet your Joker stories are the best in the world.” He simply quirks his mouth in a smile and says, “Maybe next year. I couldn’t follow that speech.” But besides Joker Day episodes (in the last one, Selina invites the Red Hood to speak in her place and he agrees enthusiastically, reckoning he was more of a villain than she ever was) and a few references here and there, the show doesn’t dwell on him. *cough* The Joker is overexposed and overrated. *cough*

You’ll have noticed the name Wayne comes up a lot. Yeah, Bruce is an important side character. He’s the idol and ‘big good’ of the whole city. The group’s opinions on Batman are… diverse, but even the minority who aren’t themselves indebted to Bruce will defend him on principle and their friends’ behalf. It’s a running joke that the next person foolish enough to kidnap or threaten the billionaire will have absolute hell to pay. This inevitably leads to the episode where a major villain does kidnap Bruce, and the Batfamily get some unexpected allies on their rescue mission…

Wayne Enterprises cures Nora early on. I mean, Victor probably would be less pacified if it still seemed hopeless. The cold open is extended to a montage of the couple becoming friends, falling in love, getting married, that establishes not only their healthy, committed relationship but that they have their own whole lives. They’re successful in their respective fields and have lots of friends. Nora’s parents died previously of natural causes, but Victor is close with his. They watch movies and have in-jokes and plan holidays. And then Nora starts to get sick. And it turns out to be terminal. She loses her job and falls into depression as it worsens, pushing away her friends and giving up all activity. “I need more time,” she begs brokenly. When Victor decides to invent his crysostatis chamber to buy her more time, it’s the first thing in months that puts light back in her eyes. “I can give you more time.” His boss Ferris Boyle order the project shut down out of callous miserliness. Victor goes behind his back to save his wife and we fade from a POV shot of her being anaesthetised to the title screen. Her revival is at the beginning of the episode. Though naturally concerned about her husband’s condition and crushed their physical relationship is dead, she’s overwhelmingly glad his suit is sustainable and she’s permanently cured. She thought her life, and their life together, were over, and as she puts it knowing they aren’t is “all [she] needs”. She ecstatically walks and runs around the room after having been bedridden for weeks and leaps into Victor’s arms. They hug. Nora remarks she’s pleased the suit at least makes Victor strong enough to lift her effortlessly. She’s crying, Victor’s been crying the whole time. Bruce is sobbing inconsolably - when Selina remarks it’s out of character, he replies he’s been wanting to cry about their love story ever since he learned Mr Freeze’s motivation, but couldn’t because he was Batman. It’s exactly as beautiful as you’d expect such a long-awaited reunion to be. Then Victor’s smiles falters. He asks for the two to have some privacy. Alone, he explains just what he’s been doing in Nora’s hibernation. No omissions, no sugarcoating. He was a supervillain. He funded his technology through crime and has innocent blood on his hands. She deserves to know, and hear it from him. They’re both tearful once more, for different reasons. She reacts how a sane person would: disbelief, betrayal, fury, heartbreak. He’s resigned to it. “If you can never trust me again, let alone enough to be my wife - if you never want to see me again, you can go. I wanted you back so you could live, not so I could have you.” She goes. The rest of the episode is Nora’s acclimatization to her new situation and her husband’s strange yet charming friends, who attempt to comfort and get to know her. Selina in particular takes her under her wing. Nora goes to an ice rink so early it’s deserted and unmarred, and skates for the first time since her diagnosis. While she puts on her boots, we see a flashback to her in the doctor’s office being told she’ll never do it again, and she struggles to stay composed, but cutting to her home she’s distraught and defeated in her husband’s arms, her trophies gleaming on the mantlepiece. Then the moment her boot blade touches the ice, a beautiful, stirring instrumental of bittersweet pleasure overtakes the previous silence. She’s amazing. She halts and holds her arms out in her triumphant finishing pose - shot from behind, an applauding audience and camera flashes appear in front of her before fading to just her, exhausted and free and alive, alone on the silent, frozen expanse. By the denouement Nora has cooled down enough to talk to him again. She expresses her gratitude for him preserving her life and acknowledges he sincerely loves her, but says she doesn’t know what to feel about him and she’ll be keeping her distance for the foreseeable future. “I need more time.” “I can give you that.”

Nora is a side character of similar relevance to Bruce. She gets her own arc of reclaiming her life, adjusting to and reasserting herself in a radically changed Gotham. The love of her life becoming a serial killer and crime boss is a huge blow to her positive outlook and view of humanity, causing her to be haunted with the fear that every good person is a just bad person waiting to happen, of what she could have done if she’d lost Victor and getting justice for them both was up to her. Would she have been the same? Or worse? Her new friendships teach her to trust again and show her that good and evil are choices we make, not fixed states of being. She’s a champion figure skater. She rises right back up to take her crown in the next championship. “The standards must have gone down while I was on ice!” She gets along best with Selina, Bruce, Ivy, Harley, Harvey and Waylon. She and Victor rekindle their bond, platonic and eventually romantic. He isn’t the man she married, he can’t undo that. But maybe he can be a better one. Knowing she’s okay makes him much more sentimental and generous. I just want them to go to the winter fair on a date and have a snowball fight, okay? For them to sit in an igloo and Nora to check her phone and confirm it’s below freezing, so after evaluating the risk, Victor removes the hand of his suit, she pulls off her glove and buries her hand in the snow to cool it down and they hold hands as long as they can. For her to breathe on his helmet and draw a heart in the condensation, followed by ‘I’ and ‘U’ on either side, in lieu of a kiss. For Victor to make her hot chocolate exactly how she likes it on a sleepless night. For Nora to discover his suit’s exhaust jets expel hot air, so if the positioning is right he can still give warm cuddles! When she learns of his crimes in her first episode, she throws her wedding ring at his feet before leaving. The culmination of their relationship arc is them having a wedding vow renewal ceremony, with her reaccepting the ring. I just want them to be an actual happy couple! Is that too much to ask?

Talia al Ghul is a recurring character. She remains an assassin, but is an anti-hero who becomes wholly independent of her father’s abusive power in a debut two-parter in which she’s the protagonist and wins a League of Assassins civil war between her and Ra’s. Bruce and her are on good platonic terms. Selina respects (and is quietly intimidated by) her competence and experienced motherliness toward Damian and Jason. Throughout the two-parter Selina is seemingly outshone by the old flame at every turn and feels insecure, until a heart-to-heart. Talia opens up that the upbringing that made her so insanely competent came with a boatload of mental issues, and she respects Selina’s resilience and courage when she’s so keenly, overtly aware of her flaws and weakness. “Under my father, there was no trying, no points for effort. Only success or failure. Perfection or utter inadequacy. It’s made me formidable, but… if I couldn’t be sure I’d succeed at everything I do, I wouldn’t be able to do anything. Passing that fear onto my son is my greatest regret. I doubt you can fail him more than I have. But you? You try. You make the effort knowing you may fall short. Today you’ve been so uncertain of your skills, even your worth, and I’m sorry for adding to that, yet you keep trying to help and make a difference anyway. You know the power of your best without needing it to always be the best, and therein lies your strength. I admire that. I admire you.” So they bond over thinking love was conditional, with Selina always feeling unworthy and Talia holding onto her worth to her father by a thread. The episodes involve flashbacks to Talia’s nightmarish childhood training and finally one of her subjecting Damian to the same (albeit with genuine love and tenderness between sessions), only to realize it and take him to his father. The climax is Talia, Batman, Robin, and Catwoman fighting Ra’s al Ghul together, telling him he won’t be hurting anyone - least of all their family - again; Selina is content to mostly play support, assured of her place in the family and unique strengths. Talia and the Gotham City Sirens subsequently have girls’ nights when she’s in town. She visits more often for her family and friends, but still not very frequently. Being that awesome is busy work! She’s considered an honorary ex-rogue.

Not all the homeless children in Waylon’s underground shelter have parents around, whether because their parents/former guardians are dead or in prison or abandoned them or got separated from them some other way, like during the process of immigration. Waylon is especially close to and protective of these kids, since in my canon his mother died when he was born (baby Waylon was too big), his father immediately took off and after raising him horribly his aunt disowned him when he was sent to juvie. He isn’t letting them feel alone in the world like he did. There’s a main group of three or four kids that get the most focus, for time’s sake. Though it takes him some time to call himself it upfront, he is their dad in everything but blood. They’re referred to as “his kids” by everyone including himself even before that. He has a subplot of coming to terms with the reality that the streets, or retired sewer tunnels but same difference, are not the proper environment for the kids however much he loves them that ties into his greater arc of learning to how live amongst other people and taking the place he deserves in society, which both culminate in him getting a home on the surface and actually adopting the main kids. The rest he struggles with saying goodbye to and trusting new guardians with, but ultimately lets them go to good, Wayhe Foundation-approved homes.

Harvey and Two-Face have an emotional support animal, a black and white kitten, with that half ‘n’ half face cats sometimes have who’s blind in her left eye, named Schrödinger (Schrödie for short). They adore her. Her presence and affection are so grounding and soothing she can help them out of dissociation, flashbacks and panic attacks. Feeding and cuddling her add extra stabilizing routine to their day. It helps that Two-Face could never bear to harm her, not even emotionally. Funnily enough, he adopted her. When their therapist suggested a pet might be beneficial, while Harvey was willing to consider it he thought it was beyond stupid; they had enough responsibilities, including each other, without a needy, annoying animal thrown into their complicated lives. But weeks later they’d been having a bad day and he switched in to find his alter had entered a cat shelter. He was leaving… when he saw her. The nameless kitten’s family had left her behind moving house. Whether the abandonment was deliberate or accidental the staff didn’t know. She was obviously unhappy in the shelter, but nobody had adopted her yet, often at least partly because of her disability. To this day Two-Face can’t say what came over him. Him being asked his reasons and deflecting is a running gag. The truth is he saw everyone had left her behind and wanted to show her they shouldn’t have, that she deserved love and care. Harvey awoke the next morning to the sound of purring and a weight on his lap, better rested than in ages. Selina’s black cat Isis is a maternal figure to Shrödinger.

John and Harley get along swimmingly. They connected over their common interest of psychology while villains and he is practically her father figure. They can often be seen having psychology talks and their ability to analyse their friends’ mental states and issues off the cuff kind of freaks the others out, who agree Harley at least is scarier as the uncompromisingly honest and precise psychiatrist.

Waylon, John and Oswald are good friends, each having known lifelong social rejection. John and Oswald can talk birds for hours.

Oswald conversely relates to Selina for the opposite reason: they were both caught in the middle between abiding the law and breaking it, being ‘civilized’ and basely selfish; they had more ground than the others to go straight, with his business long being partly legitimate and her merely a thief with strict standards. He empathizes and tries to assist with her high society drama. His arc involves unlearning his classism and habitual arrogant veneer - faults Selina is more than happy to rid him of, having a rough, destitute background herself - and the lingering mess of self-esteem issues linked to them.

Harvey’s arc is him overcoming the guilt complex, negative self-image and instinct to suppress his ‘problematic’ emotions and deny his suffering he internalized during his abused childhood and learning to not feel responsible for everyone else all the time. These flaws were reasons why Two-Face got as bad as he did and the basis of his resentment toward the dominant alter, since Harvey had refused to take any action about their father’s abuse or tell anyone he had DID, depriving Two-Face of his own identity and independence; so their relationship improves parallel to their respective individual growth. He’s a cool uncle to the Wayne children. Dick, Barbara and Jason knew him before the accident. Two-Face’s arc is him becoming more empathetic, attuned to others and mastering healthy coping mechanisms for his rage, basically figuring out who he is besides the anger he’s only allowed himself to feel for most of his existence. He doesn’t do so well with Bruce’s kids and hates the awkwardness of switching in in their company. Until he turns out to get along great with Jason and Damian. Harvey has a chance encounter with his heartbroken, estranged ex-wife Gilda Gold, who’s embittered that he didn’t tell her about his DID through years of friendship and marriage and tired of waiting for him just for him to relapse. It goes badly. (“I showed you all of me. I trusted you with all of me. Even the parts that were messy and painful, and that I was ashamed and afraid of. But you had a whole other person in your head, who could have seen and heard things I meant only for you, and I had to find out not from you or him or anyone I knew, but the news showing your alter going on a fucking killing spree! I barely even knew what DID was! And you weren’t there. I felt like I didn’t understand you, or know you, at all.” Harvey protests, reaching for her hand, “No. You knew me better than anyone -” She recoils in cold misery. “But not well enough. If you couldn’t even trust me then, how can I possibly trust you now?” He stutters and can’t respond. She quickly leaves to avoid breaking down in front of him and he falls to his knees.) This launches a relapse arc for the duo that climaxes with them attempting to steal their scarred coin back and the others staging a forceful intervention in the aforementioned Rogues’ Gallery (“How did you know I’d be here?” Harvey asks. “Two of us are psychologists and all of us have intimate experience with mental illness,” deadpans John, “it’s a miracle your relapse even got this far.”) Interestingly, while he goes along with it out of desperation and despair Two-Face is the more lucid and reasonable in this arc - Harvey is in control for most of it, slips first and drags his alter down with him, and the theft is his idea. This role reversal horrifies them both. Once they’re detained, Harvey theorizes it means they’ve reached an equilibrium of moral potential. Now he isn’t ‘the good one’ and Two-Face isn’t ‘the bad one’. They’re just two deeply messed up people free to do whatever they choose. That autonomy, and trusting themselves with it, is terrifying, but they agree it’s worth it and infinitely better than giving themselves up to chance. They subsequently stop coin flipping for good and throw the scarred one into Gotham Bay.

Eddie’s arc is being repeatedly smashed in the face with humble pie and then learning to accept hugs.

Harvey, Two-Face and Selina are the only ex-rogues to know Batman’s secret identity, and the Batfamily’s identities by association. Harvey’s known for many years, and just told Two-Face recently when between Two-Face’s internal growth and their support system he could take the gamble that he wouldn’t or at least couldn’t use the information wickedly. The resultant shared experience of constant, painful and/or hilarious dramatic irony brings the three closer. Eddie specifically knows the Signal’s secret identity. He tells no one, but is on friendly terms with him.

Waylon and Harvey are ‘I blacked out and next thing I knew my body had gone on a murderous rampage’ besties. Harvey is the best at getting through to him in his crocodilian mental state. In return, remember that relapse Harvey has? Waylon is the one who ends the museum fight by restraining him with a hug, his stony expression melting into empathetic sorrow as Harvey’s pleading rant that he needs the coin dissolves into hopeless sobs. Harvey can sew well - an entire wardrobe of half ‘n’ half clothes doesn’t make itself - and adjusts Waylon’s clothes to fit him and makes his homeless friends new clothes.

Victor and Pam are close friends. We see the history of this friendship and how it influenced their lives unfold through flashbacks. In the present of the episode, the group and Bruce are fighting for the the building and activation of the IRR, design finally perfected, that authorities fear will be weaponized maliciously. First they were just two jaded misanthropes stuck together in Arkham. (“Humans are the worst,” mutters Pam. Next to her, Victor’s frown deepens. “I emphatically relate to your sentiment.”) Then they bonded over their shared heartache, and helped each other rediscover their empathy and humanity. (Victor slumps miserably in the cafeteria, his words more a soliloquy than addressed to the metahuman poking at her food on the opposite bench. “As sharp as the sting of a loved one’s death is, the limbo my wife must be preserved in sometimes seems worse. So close, yet so far. Alive, but cut off from any kind of life she might have with me or choose for herself. A hollow existence of imprisonment, loneliness, darkness and cold, when she has the capacity to outshine the sun.” Pam doesn’t appear to be listening. Her eyes are trained on Harley’s exchange with the Joker across the room, as she’s manipulated into doubting herself and returning to him. Then suddenly she speaks: “I… relate to your sentiment.” Her voice breaks. When Victor realizes she has romantic love for Harley, he urges her to “Go to her. Harley may or may not reciprocate your feelings, but what she most needs right now is a friend.”) Later he’s delighted to hear the women get together. They really became a duo once Victor got into environmentalism. After a new low point in his villain career with Nora’s location left unknown in his lair’s destruction, he fled to self-imposed exile in the North Pole. At least he could be in peace with the pure, eternal beauty of the ice and snow, untainted by the greed and callousness of… what was wrong with the ice? Why were the ice sheets so small? They shouldn’t have been cracking nearly this rapidly at this time of year! He earned his PhD in cryogenics, he knows ice, the North Pole should not look like this! These were the most majestic sights he’d ever seen, he’d dreamed of showing Nora them. This would not do. He stormed back into Arkham. (“Dr Pamela Isley! I request your assistance! I have dramatically underestimated the severity of the global warming crisis. Your expertise is botany, but you have a thorough knowledge of climate science, do you not?”) Though surprised he could be invested in something besides Nora, Pam was pleased to have an ally and downright gleeful to have someone who will sit through her intricate presentations on climate change’s causes and effects. Victor’s ‘zap the ice caps back to their right size’ plan impressed her, but she pointed out it would never get off the ground. It’d be next to impossible to acquire such a large amount of resources. And even if he didn’t get caught before it was assembled, everyone would assume it was a superweapon and it would be shot down. It really was a shame how his criminality undermined his noble cause and stripped him of trustworthiness and effectiveness - what? Stop looking at her like that! Soon they both go straight explicitly to aid their environmental agendas. The episode ends with the IRR beginning construction and the rogues having a celebratory dinner. Victor thanks Pam for supporting him through this. She thanks him for showing her friendship when she didn’t think she was capable of it and it’s clear the feeling’s mutual. “A toast,” he proposes, Nora smiling at him in pride, “to humans not being the worst.” Pam laughs, getting a comparable look from Harley. “Now that’s a sentiment I emphatically agree with.”

Victor, Pam, Waylon and Oswald are the ‘I was outcast and by, and fundamentally isolated from, the rest of humankind due to physiological characteristics and believed all humans were inherently and inescapably bad, therefore lashed out in anger unable to accept that I could be loved’ gang.

The ex-rogues invent the game ‘It’s Called Commitment, Dammit!’ They take turns recounting the most embarrassing, absurd, or difficult experience they’ve had or knowledge they’ve learned purely for the sake of their villainous ‘gimmick’, concluding with the titular exclamation to rationalize their actions. The funniest, most compelling story wins. There are other games with this system, ‘Coolest Batman Fight’, ‘Most Humiliating Defeat By Batkid’, etc.. These stories a running gag, often heard in part with no context.

The flashback episode “Welcome Back, Dr Quinzel” shows us paralleled sequences of Harley’s three first days at Arkham Asylum: as a newbie doctor trying to appear undaunted by the asylum’s version of normal; a patient lost to herself laughing madly, attacking the guards and graphically swearing she’ll avenge her and “Mistah J”’s arrests; and reformed veteran doctor truly in her element and respected by patients and staff alike. In the first she befriends her mentor and guide Dr Joan Leland, who closes the section with a warm, encouraging “Welcome to Arkham, Dr Quinzel”. In the second Joan is put in charge of her treatment and (not that Harley registers it in her insanity) destroyed to see her like this, solemnly saying the title phrase to her when Harley is restrained. In the third they cathartically reunite as equals and hug. Harley thanks Joan for never giving up on her, and Joan returns that she has herself to thank more than anyone for getting her life back. Harley also becomes a similarly kind and supportive mentor to an overwhelmed new therapist.

A Gotham City Sirens girls’ night out episode. Set when they’re criminals, Pam hates all humans except these two and Harley is still dating the Joker, to explore their relationships at that stage of their lives and Harley’s attitudes to her abuse while it was ongoing. The three women have each had a bad week. Selina got arrested, which, like, never happens, to her embarrassment. Pam was unable to stop the oldest trees in Gotham being cut down and is keen to plant new trees and fertilize them with the men responsible’s corpses. And Harley lost a fight with Batman that left her ribs “a little banged up”, so it hurts to laugh. She casually blames herself for losing and getting the Bat’s attention and the incident is why she wants a night away from the Joker. (“You know how he gets when Batman beats him! He’s been all…” “Homicidally furious?” asks Pam. “Terrifyingly obsessive?” deadpans Selina. “Huffy!” is what Harley comes up with. The others exchange a worried look.) The best friends only see one way to blow off their steam, a Sirens tradition: joint crime spree! At the start Pam asks Harley to lay off on the explosives for tonight because she’s extra conscious of carbon emissions and Harley, despite loving explosions, agrees, a sign of their friendship. Most of the episode is antivillainous hijinks, like museum and clothes’ store heists and attacking a cop they catch threatening to shoot a black boy. Selina does her best to prevent casualties of innocents and not in self-defence. The group conflict is Harley refusing to accept she’s being abused, no matter what evidence and arguments the others present. This plot thread builds up to the climax - their demolition of the construction site on top of the felled ancient grove. After an episode of deflection from and downplaying of the topic of the Joker and her own emotions, Harley splinters at their needling and vehemently denies she’s an abuse victim, simultaneously brutally, skilfully taking out a squad of security guards. “How stupid and pathetic do you think I am? I’ve studied abusive relationships, for God’s sake! If I was bein’ abused, I’d know and I’d fight. You see this? *knocks out a guard* I’m a fighter! I’m an adult, I’m tough and intelligent and capable, and in case you forget, a motherfucking badass! I thought you saw that. That’s why I love you, and these girls’ nights! I get to be, all of me, and trusted. Respected. But apparently, you think you know me and my life better than I do!” Pam protests that her situation is the Joker’s fault, not hers, but Harley can’t hear it. She whips around to reveal she’s crying. “Is it so hard to believe someone could love me?” Pam inhales sharply, stung. “Is it so hard to believe someone could love you without it hurting?” she asks gently. Harley trembles, clenches her hammer in a death grip and screws her eyes shut. She impetuously decides to bring the building site down her way, both to prove her power to her friends and push them away in a projection of her self-hatred. Her way is throwing all her many explosives at a central support pillar and shooting the most potent one to detonate it. Big boom. Several people die; and Pam’s vines burn as thick black smoke pours into the sky, Selina and Pam respectively watching in horror. Harley grins desperately against the flames. Pam declares girls’ night over and storms away. Selina offers to let Harley stay with her, but Harley laments that she almost killed her and insists she’d just be trouble, then snaps, “Just leave! That’s what you do best, right? You doesn’t have to pretend you’re something better for me of all people.” Selina flinches. “Got me there.” Alone, Harley begins to chuckle. It grows to shrieks of maniacal laughter as she clutches her chest and crumples to her knees, gradually combined with wheezing, coughing and sobbing, visibly forcing herself to keep smiling. Her agonized hyperventilation calming down replaces the credits music. The last sounds we hear are her ringtone and a faint, shaky “Mistah J? Can you c-come pick me up, please?”

I don’t think the show should have many legacy villains who reuse an older villain’s gimmick. However, I do have an episode in mind for a second Scarecrow. This Scarecrow is a former abused henchman of John far cleverer and more ambitious than his boss credited him for. He’s tweaked his fear toxin recipe to be the most potent yet (and work on Pam and Harley) and got upgraded gear. He is targeting John specifically, and hunts down his friends to cause him pain. John is incredibly guilty, which every attack worsens, because the citizens and his friends’ suffering is the direct result of his evil actions. He invented the base toxin, he himself even pushed a low-level henchman to supervillainy! But his rampant remorse paralyzes him, too afraid of making things worse; of course, Batman gets trapped or otherwise delayed somehow by the Scarecrow’s overarching plan and it falls to him with his total immunity to fear toxin to save the day. The final nail in the coffin is Harley getting gassed. Her eyes widen and she backs into the wall, shaking her head and mumbling, “No” repeatedly. She tries to act defiant, unresponsive to John’s efforts to ground her, and protests against whatever threat she’s seeing, but her tone is pleading. He reaches toward her. She instantly flinches away and falls to the floor in a trembling, hyperventilating ball. “Okay, okay! J-j-just go easy on me this time…” It’s obvious who she thinks she’s talking to. John is aghast. He quickly sets into cool, orderly, murderous rage. Oswald had figured out the Scarecrow’s hideout and was going to send it to Batman (and the non-indisposed vigilantes) right when he got gassed. John does so for him, but proceeds to take body armour, a gas mask just in case and a gun in preparation to drive there himself. The Scarecrow floods his lair with fear gas upon detecting him. He moves through it, implacable, unwavering, and corners and terrifies the terrorist. “I’m going to make you wish Batman found you first.” He proceeds to beat the crap out of his imitator using his trademark underhanded, manipulative tactics (e.g. he steals the Scarecrow’s weapons after he runs out of bullets). During the fight the Scarecrow unmasks him, but he seems mildly inconvenienced at worst. At last Scarecrow II is helpless. John sees his petrified eyes and severe flinching away from his abuser, even shot exactly like Harley’s, reminding him how horrible it is to both feel that and cause it in someone, and throws the scythe aside in horror and disgust. After handing his successor over to the Bats, he gives him a sincere, non-justifying apology, tells him that he understands his pain and from one Scarecrow to another, it isn’t worth it. His friends are furiously concerned. He downplays both the accomplishment and the situation’s seriousness, claiming the rush of adrenaline and hysterical strength stop him feeling a thing. “Oh, wait,” he says, still apparently calm, “it’s wearing off.” He faints into Edward’s arms. In the hospital, he’s given the revised fear toxin antidote just to be safe. He wakes up with Harley clutching his hand. She congratulates him and he downplays it again, but thinks twice. He reveals his resistance didn’t apply to the new strain in such large quantities - he was hallucinating the entire time since the mask came off. How could he keep going? His worst nightmare is losing his friends. The first people he’s cared about and have cared about him in most of his life, who “taught me there are things stronger than fear.” The more their screams rang in his ears, the sharper his focus and righteous drive became. That’s how he held back from killing again, because he wanted to prove the old him was dead. The Scarecrow II recovers in Arkham and reforms, though he never forgives John or joins the group to all their understanding.

Selina initially lacks faith in her and Bruce’s relationship. She was on her own for too long, hurt and disappointed him over and over, did everything she could to claw out her place in his family… it seems unbelievable that he could forgive and love her after all that. That she could be worthy of love. A part of her remains proud of the years of hard, painful work she did to build her emotional walls, and can’t accept it’s time to tear them down. In the same vein, she struggles to think of herself as a worthy mother to the Batfamily kids. The episode “Cat Among the Robins” has her join the Wayne siblings (minus Duke) on a special mission. Her relationships with all of them are explored, but most of all Jason. The stressed, troubled young man tries to stay professional, exaggerating his coldness and throwing himself into the mission as a distraction from a rough patch in his and Bruce’s relationship. Her and Jason’s insecurities are compared. Her afraid to be a mother, him afraid to be a son. She keeps wanting to talk to him, but doesn’t get the chance. The intro is a flashback to Catwoman minding a young Jason, freshly Robin, on a rooftop. She’s sitting, he stands. They’re quickly endeared to each other. He dramatically relates the night he met Batman, the audacity of his tyre theft impressive even in Selina’s book. (“You have a way with words, kitten. You could be a writer someday,” she says. Jason’s eyes are starry. “You think so? So does my English teacher! Well, she hasn’t actually said the writer part, but -” he whispers proudly in her ear - “I’m pretty sure I’m her favourite student.” Selina ruffles his hair, and her every word brings him closer to seemingly exploding with joy. “Why wouldn’t you be? I remember school at your age, my teachers would have killed for a kid like you. You’re gonna do great things when you’re bigger. Listen, when you’re rich and famous from your epic novels about a brave young hero vanquishing evil, don’t forget to dedicate one to me. For being your inspiration.” “Deal!” Jason offers her his hand and they shake.) The end has them alone on a rooftop again. Jason is preparing to jump off the edge - “I was right.” asks Selina softly. He falters. “What?” “You’re bigger and you’re doing great things.” He turns to face her and removes his helmet for the first time, face unmistakable yet a far cry from the blissful boy she used to babysit. He sighs and smiles weakly. “Well, I had good inspirations.” She talks him through his worries (literally what I just said about her relationship with Bruce but familial rather than romantic) and assures him. Their framing and positions are reserved from the flashback, him sitting and her standing. “Being hurt and lonely isn’t who you are, it’s what stops you being who you are. And Jason Todd,” she concludes crouched down to his level, taking his hand tenderly, “who you truly are, and will always be in the hearts of those who love you… is a massive nerd.” He bursts out laughing. “You laugh, but all your books are still in your room.” “I know,” says Jason, smiling fondly in remembrance of Bruce’s gesture. Then his expression is clouded with dawning realization. He scrambles to his feet. “Oh my God, I never finished 1984! I died halfway through! Can’t even remember what happens, now I’ve gotta reread the beginning, dammit…” Jason picks up his helmet and hurries to the edge again while Selina shakes her head in amusement, only for him to suddenly double back and hug her like the mother and son they are. He whispers, “Thank you.” She strokes his hair. “Anytime, kitten.” Yeah, she doesn’t need to worry about being good mother material.

Pam and Harley marry at some point, around the middle. The proposal episode, “Pamela and Harleen”, is set on their dating anniversary, the one that marks their relationship outlasting Harley and the Joker’s. Some previous anniversaries having been ruined by other supervillains, Bats and police and sheer circumstance, they’re eager to make this day perfect. Of course, life has other plans; but together they make the best of it. The ending is finally a picturesque, peaceful romantic moment as they watch the sunset over Robinson Park. Pam looks over to see Harley down on one knee, holding out a gold ring with a flower of rubies on it. She flushes and raises her hands to her mouth. Harley says, getting a little choked up, “I’ll be honest, I drafted and redrafted a big speech for this a dozen times. But in the end I gave up. As someone who’s made a living out of breaking down and clearly articulating even the strongest, deepest, purest, most layered feelings there are, I don’t have the words to say how much I love you. So I thought I’d just show you instead. Dr Pamela Isley, do you wanna marry me?” Pam puts on the ring and takes her hands. “Dr Harleen Quinzel…” She pulls her to her feet. “I really, really do.” They hug and Pam unconsciously causes growth spurts in plants all across Gotham. The wedding ceremony takes place in Pam’s personal botanical garden. They both wear clothes that reference their classic villain costumes: Pam a gorgeous, elaborate dress self-constructed out of foliage and flowers complete with a flower crown, Harley an alternating red and black suit with diamond embroidery that the Dent system made with pink and blue plaited pigtails. Ivy grows a bouquet in the moment and Selina, the chief bridesmaid/maid of honour of Harley, catches it offhand with her Catwoman reflexes. Bonus if Bruce is there with her. Extra bonus if Bruce is there as Batman, who the brides give a special “inbatation” as thanks for sparing and saving their lives and supporting their rehabilitations when they did not make it easy for him. Pam selects Victor to be her best man and he squeals with delight. His heartfelt speech makes Nora (pre-official reconciliation) warm up to him a little and she compliments it and his new friendships near the end at the party. He offers her a dance “for old time’s sake”. She hesitates, then takes his hand and smiles. “Not just for that.”

The episode right after the Harlivy proposal has them telling everyone the news and starting wedding prep over about a week. It’s all very heartwarming and fluffy, but also, known to the audience but not to them, Harley keeps narrowly missing assassination attempts while they’re together (they do get a little suspicious, but are too caught up to dwell on it and, well, bad things happen a lot in Gotham). The mysterious would-be assassin seems to have a very deep, personal hatred for both of them, and just gets more motivated the more she sees how nice, happy and in love they are. It turns out that years ago her husband was thoughtlessly murdered in front of her, by not Harley but Pam. Having always been sceptical and distrustful of redeemed supervillains, seeing an engagement ring on Poison Ivy’s finger - seeing them set to have the very happiness they stole from her - was the last straw. She wants to give Ivy the exact same grief and trauma she gave her. In the climax she gives up trying to be subtle and just corners them in an alley, sprays Pam with pesticide that briefly incapacitates her and cuffs her to a fire escape, and aims a gun at Harley point blank. The couple sympathize and empathize with her upon hearing her story, which of course only makes her angrier - how dare they be so kind and understanding and such good people as if it makes up for everything they’ve done? They manage to talk her down, Harley in particular with her psychological ability, arguing that: murder feels shitty, even if it’s someone you believe deserves to die; your first murder always feels extra shitty and you will miss the part of yourself that it takes afterward; the ‘right back at ya!’ style of revenge seems wonderfully just and cathartic, but the risk of recreating your trauma is your own PTSD resurfacing enhanced by guilt; and the prison system is still, you know, bad. Initially she holds fast and scoffs that they should have thought of all these great arguments against killing people before they became supervillains. But the more they sway her, the more her merciless facade cracks until she breaks. “No! You don’t get to ruin my life and then save my soul! You don’t get to be the heroes here! I’m the one in control!” “Yes, you are,” rasps Pam. “Our lives are completely in your hands. Harleen has a loaded gun pointed at her, and I don’t need to tell you how afraid I am. It’s up to you to pull that trigger… or not. It’s up to you to save yourself.” The widow looks between their pleading expressions, her hand shakes and the gun clatters to the ground. She promptly runs out of adrenaline and crashes, processing that she spent a whole week trying to kill another human being. Harley sends her to a therapist.

Kirk Langstrom, aka Man-Bat, is permanently cured by John in an episode, but much of the focus is Waylon bonding with him. He’s a minor character, but maintains a friendship with Waylon and by extension Harvey.

Pam and John, the world experts on evil mind-altering chemistry, help Batman and the Signal finally cure the Joker toxin afflicting Duke’s parents. This is a show about happy endings. Duke, Elaine and Doug’s is long overdue! By the end of the episode it’s implied they silently figure out the Signal, who they like, respect and have bonded with over science and traumatic experiences with and who John says he would have loved to teach, is Bruce Wayne’s ward Duke. It’s the ultimate vindication of Bruce’s no-kill rule and unwavering belief in humanity to have the villains he spared not simply no longer hurt, but actively improve lives and the state of the world, even perform direct acts of kindness toward him and his own family. Dark, gritty hellhole Gotham that never improves much is a fine setting and atmosphere in Batman’s earlier stages. But after all these years of heroes struggling and fighting and sacrificing for it, I want to show that dedication has tangibly meant something. That it wasn’t in vain. From the Batfamily themselves to the ex-rogues to the ordinary citizens, things really have got and will continue to get better. The promise that started it all, the one a boy made on his parents’ grave, can be kept. I think this might be the most optimistic Batman story I’ve ever seen. I like that. Batman is an inherently optimistic character, so why shouldn’t his stories match?

The Court of Owls could be major antagonists later on? Like, its intricate underground conspiracy and need to control Gotham contrasts the protagonists’ desire to lead simple lives and leave all that kind of business, and their personal harmful means of control, behind. Its deep connection to Gotham’s history both mirrors the irreversible impact the protagonists have had on that history and contrasts their capacity to brighten its future. The Owls are essentially a thematic foil to the ex-rogues. As the ex-rogues learn to let go, they keep tightening their grip. Where the found family consists of unique, eccentric individuals encouraged to be themselves in the best way possible, the Court is conformist and stifling and its bonds toxic and emotionally distant. And it would be funny for the protagonists to not be intimidated by them whatsoever. “Before we get into our… disagreement, I’d just like to commend you on the appropriateness of your gimmick, what with owls being the natural predators of bats. I’m biased in favour of birds, of course.” A cult leader stands up straighter and her glare at Oswald intensifies. “The Court does not have a gimmick,” she snarls. Oswald spreads his hands genially. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of. All the best villains have one - ” A hurled knife grazing his ear and nicking a few hairs cuts him off. He says under his breath, “No need to be rude about it.” Later in this plot arc, he smoothly outsmarts, humiliates and incapacitates a number of the Court’s elite members in a fight. “You know something about owls? They’re associated with intelligence and wisdom. In truth, their brains are so well adapted to their specific hunting methods and evolutionary niche, they leave little room for the human definition of intelligence. Owls often fail to solve logic puzzles. They mostly can’t be trained. They make fatal mistakes at a higher rate than other birds of prey. In their preferred context they’re extremely competent, but outside it? Due to their narrow, short-sighted focus, they’re really quite stupid. I did say it was an appropriate gimmick.” “For the last time,” the leader snarls, stumbling toward him, “we are the all-knowing, all-powerful Court of Owls! We don’t have a -” He unceremoniously knocks her out and rolls his eyes. “Oh, get over yourselves.”

Bruce and Selina get engaged partway through the final season. The episode contains a flashback to a classic Batman/Catwoman escapade ending with her betrayal and abandonment of him to a trap, mocking him for trusting her. We glimpse her regret, he doesn’t. (“You’re better than this!” he cries. Guilt flashes across her face and she turns back slightly, but hardens again. “If you really believe that, you aren’t quite the world’s greatest detective.” Her formerly playful voice is heavy and joyless.) She proposes to him at the end of the episode. He confesses he was actually thinking of asking her soon. She murmurs, “Guess I’m still a step ahead of you.” He smiles and they kiss passionately. “Guess you are.” They marry - a small, private, individualized wedding prior to their fancy public wedding that’s just a formality - in the series grand finale. Harvey is Bruce’s best man and they have a tearful hug when he accepts the proposition. Harley, Pam, Nora, and Holly Robinson are Selina’s bridesmaids, her sister Maggie her chief bridesmaid. Her something borrowed is a silver necklace Nora wore at her wedding; something blue is a sapphire brooch Bruce bought her years ago after stopping her stealing it the previous night; something old is a frayed ribbon from her mother, the only thing of her she has left; something new is a flower Pam grows for her to wear in her hair. Her speech examines in-depth how he broke down her fear of intimacy, apathy toward the world and other people, need to control every aspect of her life and filter it through her barriers, and overall made her a better person ready to face the unknown with her hand in his. The world’s two weirdest, most messed-up found families are united! Oh, and an evil conspiracy may reach its culmination and nearly kill them all. But that’s not the point.

The series altogether ends in a montage of the group’s ordinary lives and the positive impacts they’ve had: Victor and Nora snuggled on the sofa watching a news broadcast of the IRR expanding the North Pole; Waylon being a welcomed, comfortable guest at the adoptive home of a kid he’d looked after on the streets, whose parents he had to learn to trust in the earlier episode they were adopted in; an evidently depressed teenager managing to stagger out of bed to take John’s new antidepressants; Harley and Pam at a nature reserve in Kenya with Harley cooing over hyenas and Pam regrowing removed forest; and an extended family portrait in Wayne Manor with Selina, Talia and Harvey as well as the entire Batfamily and their pets, among plenty more scenes. Over it the protagonists give a narration that imparts advice for self-improvement and a hopeful message to not give up on yourself, “because you’ll be amazed by what you’re capable of. Up to and including being happy and loved.”

*Breakfast table*

Tim, drinking his coffee: To be honest, I’m quite impressed, Jason. How did you manage to get Dick to rest? He has been onto this case for months now, and getting more and more grumpy.

Jason: Easy, I drugged him.

Tim: You drugged him?!

Jason: Yeh, I went down the cave with a cup of cocoa and be like “hey Dickie how’s work I made you cocoa” he thanked me without even looking at me, so I said “I want to watch you drink it.” Thankfully he’s still semi-sociable in hyperfocus mode, so he looked at me, raised an eyebrow, and downed it.

Tim: Well, I guess that’s efficient. *sips his coffee*

Jason: I’m Alfred’s honorary apprentice after all.

Jason: By the way, Timbo. How long have you been awake?

Tim, chuckles: 45 hours? Close to 50? I’m not entirely sure. What's the date today? Anyway I’m just here to grab the coffee, now Dick’s resting, I’m gonna finish-

Jason: Don’t worry, I’m drugging you too.

Tim: You’re dru- *passes out*

Alfred, enters the kitchen: *high-fives Jason*

Bruce: I would love to adopt you, Billy.

Billy: Uh-huh. No can do, grandpa.

Bruce: *cue internal panic*

Later

Bruce: I can’t believe you adopted Billy and didn’t tell me!

Jason, who has literally no idea what Bruce is talking about: Wha-

Bruce: I had to find out by him calling me grandpa!

Jason, pretty sure Billy was just calling Bruce old: Oh, well, uh…

Bruce: I have a grandchild now! I had to dig out all my worlds best grandpa shirts from the attic!

Jason: Why do you have grandpa shirts in the attic?

Bruce: Eh, Dick’s early twenties were an adventure. Anyway-

Jason, seeing the opportunity to cause chaos: Well, it’s pretty new…

Later

Jason: Okay, so sign here please.

Billy: *eyes adoption papers skeptically*

John: Do it.

Billy: Huh?

John: It’ll be bloody hilarious.

Billy: Yeah, okay.

get out of the way, vigilantes are crossing the road!

can someone for the love of god tell me who the op is because im inconsolable

In fanfic (and sometimes in actual canon ig) each of Bruce's sons tend to have a generally agreed upon nickname, like Dick usually has chum, Jason has lad or some form of it, Tim gets sweetheart a lot? Which is a different kind of affectionate name than chum and lad and exists kinda outside what I'm thinking, but I think as he collects more kids, the terrible dad nicknames should keep coming, Damian is sport, Duke is champ, Cass is kiddo, once Bruce called Steph bud and they were both horrified

Scientists have discovered how to make glow-in-the-dark cats by inserting the jellyfish genes that create fluorescent proteins into feline eggs.

Cass is out on patrol and sees Polka Dot Man trying to rob a Dollar General. After she shoos him away, she wanders down an aisle and soon finds the most absurd item in the store.

Cass, in full costume, approaching the cashier: How much?

Paul the Cashier, a fifty year old man who has been working night shifts in Gotham for over thirty years: Just take it. Christ.

—

Later that week:

Tim, stepping into the shower, sees this peeking out at him from behind his shampoo:

Tim: …okay

Tim, texting Cass: Did you give me a Rainbow Batman?

Cass: Pass along the Rainbow Batman for good luck

—

Jason, returning to his safe house after a long night, opens the fridge and sees Rainbow Batman standing knee-deep in his potato salad.

Jason: fuck is this

Tim, texting him seconds later: Pass along Rainbow Batman for good luck.

—

Over the next few months, Rainbow Batman circulates its way around most of the Bat-team. It bounces from Jason to Dick to Damian to Steph. Eventually it gets to Duke, who is tasked with presenting it to Bruce. He waits until Bruce is in a decent mood, then puts it on the driver’s seat of the Batmobile one night as they are all wrapping up a case.

Bruce, opening the Batmobile door: —thank you for your help, Dick. I know you’ve been busy. And Duke, I appreciate you altering your schedule for us. Steph, your intel was excellent. I’m very pleased with the outcome of this mission. You all managed to keep the insubordination at a tolerable level.

Jason, whispering to Dick: Damn, two thank-yous, a compliment, and only one passive-aggressive comment? Did he get laid or something?

Bruce, spotting the Rainbow Batman: I…

Bruce:

Bruce: This??

Bruce: Is this…

Duke, about to explain: Cass found it—

Bruce, clearly trying to process something, blurts out: Is this your way of telling me you all know about Clark?

Everyone:

Jason: called it

it’s a general consensus that batman’s cape is a bigger dimension in the inside where all the little batlings hide but: how do they all move?

do they:

• cling onto batman’s body like a koala?

• do a lil shuffle waltz and waddle with every step?

• wear heelies/ roller skates so they just slide as they cling onto batman’s body?

In fanfic (and sometimes in actual canon ig) each of Bruce's sons tend to have a generally agreed upon nickname, like Dick usually has chum, Jason has lad or some form of it, Tim gets sweetheart a lot? Which is a different kind of affectionate name than chum and lad and exists kinda outside what I'm thinking, but I think as he collects more kids, the terrible dad nicknames should keep coming, Damian is sport, Duke is champ, Cass is kiddo, once Bruce called Steph bud and they were both horrified

Okay but imagine an AU where Nightwing is in Fawcett City for a case or something and somehow discovers that Captain Marvel is actually an orphan child. I just imagine his brain going “black hair, blue eyes, Batson” and his inner Bruce just comes out and he convinces Billy to come home with him and adopts him.

Which means that Batman is now his grandfather.

I just want the League to not know about this new development and see this weird new dynamic between Batman and Captain Marvel and be like “wtf is going on”. Like Batman is probably acting warmer towards Billy which is just weird to the League because 1. Batman is not nice to anyone and 2. why Captain Marvel?????

You know when Captain Marvel get exposed for being a ten-year old, most of the time the JL members became uncharacteristically ‘Mean’, but tbf they are literally just a team of confuse adults handling an equally confuse ten year old in an unfamiliar situation, where they are definitely not equipped to handle. (Say all you want about Batman knowing the truth, he still is as lost as the other heroes, hence his lack of action. )

Than again, ten year olds are rather petty (most of the time atleast), so a team of confuse adults dealing with a petty ten year old is a rather fun recipe that would lead anyone trying to follow said recipe into a morbit disarray.

When in doubt, all you need is a qualified adult to swoop in and save the day :D

(Right, let’s just throw gasoline into a wild fire, that would definitely stop it. I mean when there is nothing left to burn the fire would probably stop….Eventually!)

.

In the midst of the meeting..

Billy: That’s it! What we need is an intervention from an experienced adult!

Hal: But we are adults?

Billy: ಠಿ_ಠ

….

Billy: Just call your guardians.

So there it is, one afternoon, up in space where most hero resides in the watchtower. If you try to peek through a really small hole (or use your x-ray vision)… There was..

An aging butler, two retired farmers, a literal Goddess, a (The) Wizard and other member’s parentual / guardian figure argueing in a large room about the validity of a ten-year old superhero.

Bonus:

Superman rushed to Kansas frantically searching for another set of clothing to give to his parents once he found out (to his horror) that his parents had decided to wear his merch, up to the watch tower lol.

Que a montage where most of the heroes’ parents decided to tell embarrassing stories about their children, much to the dismay of said hero ( and much to the joy of Billy. )

i feel like if someone addressed Billy Batson as William he'd be like 'who the fuck are you talking to'

Random Kid: Batman’s the best JL member

Billy: Batman’s a dweeb

Kid: fine, then who’s you’re favorite?

~

Clark, still in metropolis, zeroing in on this conversation: 👀

~

Billy, not needing the wisdom of Solomon to realize what he has done: (sweating) none…none of them, I like them all e-equally…

jason: soooo, who's the new guy?

billy, currently sitting in the manor's living room eating a sandwich: hi

damian: i'm just as lost as you are

dick, inspecting billy carefully: wait a minute. blue eyes, black hair, around ten/eleven-ish

tim, catching up: oh shit, do you happen to be an orphan by any chance, new guy?

billy, very confused: yeah? how did you know?

dick: fucking hell bruce! you adopted another kid and you didn't tell us! again!

bruce, entering the room, also confused: what?

damian: pennyworth won't be happy about this, father

jason: i thought we were past this, bruce. we already talked, you cannot fill the void with even more stray kids who somewhat resemble younger you

tim, sighing: where did you kidnap him from this time?

bruce:

billy: uhh i think there's been a misunderstanding...

bruce, so done with this shit: boys, i'd like you to meet captain marvel

dick, jason, tim, damian: o h ?

Shazam concept: the justice league figures out that the entire Shazamily is shapeshifting children but they put two and two together to get thirty and come to the conclusion that Billy is their adoptive father

i love battinson sm for many reasons & boy oh boy i want my autistic baby jason & autistic legend bruce bonding

Shazam concept: the justice league figures out that the entire Shazamily is shapeshifting children but they put two and two together to get thirty and come to the conclusion that Billy is their adoptive father

Shazam AU, where Billy keeps his powers even when he’s not Shazam. The only reason he turns into Shazam is to keep a secret identity.  Imagine a villain “depowering” him, only to get curbed-stomped by a 10-year-old.



A fully accurate, to-scale comparison of the Cullens’ heights

Sometimes even the villains have standards

AU where instead of “Bruce Wayne” being a mask he uses to cover up he’s Batman the Batman persona is the act and he’s just actually a dumbass himbo whenever he’s not doing Batman shit. Nobody in the Justice League knows this until one of them tells a really good joke and Batman just bursts out laughing and they all freak out trying to figure out if he got his with Joker-Toxin or something until they call the Batcave and Dick is just like, “Oh yeah that’s how he normally is when he isn’t Batman” and now they’re all freaking out for a different reason because what the fuck since when