*A Lie*

I do not know

if it's the world that is grey

Or is it me who's colour blind

Am I seeing the picture in pieces

Or did people really forget how to be kind

Drowning in ambitions and greed

Are we really leaving the humanity behind

Maybe I failed to appreciate

The life that was given

Or maybe it's the world

That doesn't deserve me.

Na hum khud se khush hain,

Na iss duniyaa ki rivazon se;

Fir v ussi ko leke age kyun badh rahe hain hum?

malum hai ki kuchh galat ho raha hai;

Jo samaj Humne banaya tha,

Usse humara hi dum ghut raha hai;

Fir bhi badlab se itna darte kyun hain hum?

Evil Place Called Mind

I stare into the void,

Lost in my head.

I scream from inside,

I beg for help.

It's an bottomless abyss,

An endless maze.

As the tendrils of evil thoughts,

Drags me down,

Deeper and deeper,

To some dark unknown place.

I look at the sky,

Grasping the hanging roots of sanity,

I pray to God,

For some semblance of reality.

But the sky still remains dark,

As it throws back my plea,

As if saying I'm not worthy enough,

For the life given to me.

I lose my grip on sanity,

Losing all hope,

As a firm tendril yanks me down,

Trapping me somewhere I can't get out of.

It's the evil place called my mind.

You patched yourself up

With little pieces of me

But can't you really see

It has left me empty

The daunting hollowness

Eating me from inside

Yet your eyes taunt

I must be guilty

What's so additive

About the pain and the heartache

That I couldn't step aside

Until pushed to the edge

I couldn't leave your side

The millions of seconds

It took me to realise

The best of your moments

Are the worst of my life

Born again

It's been two decades since I was born

With everyday asking myself 'what for?'

With everyday looking up to a stone idol

Expecting answer to the one question I can't utter...

It's been one decade since the realization struck

That all those pleas and questions I sent

Was received by a room full of nothingness

And even if some soul lingers in that darkness

He doesn't care about a girl with a cruel fate...

That whenever I looked up at the sky

With the hope in my heart to find salvation

All along it had nothing to offer

Except darkness and suffocation...

It's been some years since I came to acceptance

That a tree can't move away from its roots

It took some time to put back the pieces

To mend something that has always been broken

To stand up and walk again

I still have the scars and one fragile heart

Unanswered questions and unfulfilled wishes

But now I know, it doesn't make a difference

I can't cut my roots but I can still grow

And that was when,

I was born again.

Evanescence

Why does it matter that

I leave my footprints in the sand

If it can't even survive a wave of sea water...

Why does it matter that,

I leave the traces of my being

If one day,

It's going to be blown by the wind...

Why does it matter that

I inscribe my name

On a rock at the peak of that mountain

If one day,

it's going to fade with the inexorable rain...

Why does it matter that

I mark my space in the minds of others

When the memories you hold

Are not even loyal to you...

Why does it matter

That I make myself

A little more significant than others

If everything in this world

Evanesces with time anyway...

Sponge.

I try to cry. I can’t. So used to not letting the tears flow, Holding them back. Conditioning learned from a young age. Well, at least I’m successful at something.

I try to cry. I can’t. A few tears seep out of my eyes… Then the feeling fades away. My brain, it feels like a sponge–

Full of dirty dish water. Try to wring it out. Then it fights back harder. One day, I will no longer feel This deep pain and sorrow.

Sometimes

When I'm staring at the stars

At night

My dreams come alive

As if the million tiny lights

Are holding a mirror to my mind

At times

I let myself wander those streets

it's a different world alright

And In my haze of midnight

I hold my fist tight

I won't let it slip this time

not this time

But as the earth glows in light

And the darkness goes to hide

forcing me out of the world

I painted with my mind