I Feel This But From The Receiving End. I Like To Be Things.

can i be honest. it's fucked that terfs got to claim the term gender critical. like their asses are NOT critiquing the hegemonic ways that the male and female genders are forced into rigid societal roles and no other genders are permitted to exist, they agree with all that shit. they think it's biologically innate. they're just mad when someone tries to break out of it

"I can be myself when I'm with you" is a top tier compliment

What’s your thoughts on Delicious in Dungeons Character Designs?

Ryoko Kui is the best to ever do it.

😒✋ "daylight savings means you lose an hour of sleep"

😎👉 "daylight savings means you get to go to bed an hour early"

💭

Important rules/tips I've learned as an adult that helped with anxiety

If people are mad at you, it's their responsibility to tell you, not your responsibility to guess

If they're mad at you in secret anyways, they're the ones in the wrong, not you

If people don't like what you're doing, it's their responsibility to tell you

If they say it's fine when it's really not, they're the ones in the wrong, not you

People are allowed to be wrong about you

If they are wrong about you, wait for them to bring it up, because if you try to, you will inevitably overcorrect

Some people are committed to misunderstanding you. You will not win arguments against them. Yes, even if you explain your point of view. They do not care. Drop it

The worst thing that will happen from a first-time offense is being told not to do it again. Maybe with a replacement if you broke something

You can improve relationships and gauge willingness to talk to you by giving compliments. It's like a daily log-in bonus and nobody thinks twice about it

Most things are better after you sleep on them

Most things are better after you have a meal

Most things are better after you shower

Your brain makes up consequences that are irrational. If the worst DOES come to pass and someone acts like they do in your head, they are overreacting, and you are entitled to say "what the fuck"

If your chest hurts after you feel like you've made a social error, that's called rejection-sensitive dysphoria. It means your anxiety is so bad that it's causing you physical pain, which is a good indicator that you're overreacting. Tense yourself, hold it for 20 seconds, let it go, then find a distraction

If you're suddenly angry at someone after you feel like you made a social error, that's also rejection-sensitive dysphoria. You are going to feel annoyed about it for awhile, but being genuinely pissed off is your anxiety trying to find something to blame to take the responsibility off your shoulders, and getting scared because it can't justify itself. Deep breaths, ask yourself how much you ACTUALLY want to be angry at that person, then find a distraction

"Sour grapes" is more healthy for you than stewing. Deciding you don't like someone who's perpetually annoyed with you, won't talk to you, etc. makes letting go of anxiety over them easier

If people don't like you, they will find reasons to be annoyed with you when they otherwise wouldn't. If people do like you, they will find reasons NOT to be annoyed with you when they otherwise would. People do not ping-pong between the two

You DO have to make a conscious choice not to think about something. If you're having trouble circling back to it, say out loud that you're done thinking about it and why. Then find a distraction

When you're upset, part of you is going to want to make false bids for attention (suddenly texting differently, heavy sighs, etc. but when someone asks you about it, you tell them it's nothing). Do not listen to it. You gain nothing from it except more misery

People like to help people they care about. It makes them feel good about themselves

If you think you're insufferable for needing help, see above. Yes, really. They get a serotonin kick from it

If you think you're insufferable for mannerisms you have, you either have to consciously choose not to do them, or accept that they're part of the package that comes with you. Being apologetic about existing does nothing except make you more miserable

If you do things you don't like when you feel meh about it, it makes it easier to do them when you hate it

If you avoid things you don't like when you feel meh about it, it reinforces and magnifies how bad it feels when you hate it

Seriously. Read those last two points again. If you can make yourself make a phone call when you've got nothing to lose, you will slowly lose that panic you get when you have to make a phone call you haven't prepared for. You do have to CONSCIOUSLY take that step

Hobbies that make you care for something get rid of that nagging feeling that you're not doing enough. Go grow some rosemary

If you don't engage with your hobbies regularly, you will feel miserable, and anxiety will spike

Hobbies are things that give you a bit of happiness. They do not have to be organized or named to do that. Go be creative in something. Play with coins. Make up lists. Start a new WIP

No one cares what you look like

If people point out things they don't like about how you look unprompted, they are being rude. You are entitled to say "what the fuck"

People who like you will find you pretty to some degree. Minor things about your appearance go completely unnoticed. Literally, scars and dots and blemishes do not register to someone who likes your company

You looking at yourself in the mirror is 10x more closely than anyone is going to look at you

If you're anxious about your body type, and you're creatively inclined, make/write an oc with that same shape. Give them nice things and make other characters love them. Put them on adventures. You'll start to see yourself in the mirror more kindly

You care about wording and perfect lines/colors way more than anyone who views your work ever will

Sometimes when you're upset, you're going to feel like not eating. Do not do that. Not eating makes you more miserable

Same with things you normally enjoy. Denying yourself helps no one. You are punishing yourself for being sad. Stop it

Both of these will take conscious decision to break the habit of. Make yourself do it anyways, and it will slowly get easier

And again, to reiterate: If someone is mad at you, it is THEIR responsibility to tell you, not your responsibility to guess

Ok but like. What the fuck is there to do on the internet anymore?

Idk when I was younger, you could just go and go and find exciting new websites full of whatever cool things you wanted to explore. An overabundance of ways to occupy your time online.

Now, it’s just… Social media. That’s it. Social media and news sites. And I’m tired of social media and I’m tired of the news.

Am I just like completely inept at finding new things or has the internet just fallen apart that much with the problems of SEO and web 3.0 turning everything into a same-site prison?

This adds an interesting irony to Deltarune with Kris seemingly struggling to "be themself" while the red soul is inside them.

the red soul

(undertale spoilers)

each fallen human has a specifically coloured soul associated with them. these colours can be seen on the coffins in new home, asgore’s soul containers, and the photoshop flowey boss battle. little is known about these souls, but what can be inferred is that each soul colour represents a unique trait. accessing this information requires multiple rounds of “ball game” in the snowdin forest. if the game is completed fast enough and the red flag is obtained, the following message appears.

however, red soul’s trait is never mentioned. or is it?

determination is not a trait

before exploring the red soul’s trait, it’s time to explain why determination is not the red soul’s trait. while it is a popular choice, it ultimately does not work for a few reasons. unlike the other traits, every human soul has determination. 

rather than being a trait, determination is more akin to willpower or resolve. it’s a power that gives human souls “the strength to persist after death.” furthermore, this determination is extracted from the six human souls and injected into a golden flower, bringing flowey to life and giving him the power to control the underground’s timeline. this same power is what gives the humans the power to save and load.

unlike all the other traits, determination is inherently inside all humans. furthermore, “determination” is never mentioned in the ball game. it’s also never specifically linked with the red soul nor is it ever written in red text. the word “determination” is only written in white or yellow. 

there is nothing that suggests determination is an exclusive trait to the red soul. it is merely a component in all the coloured human souls.

» read more: determination is yellow

the ball game

the different soul colours each represent their own positive traits according to “ball game.” the first time the red flag is achieved, the following message appears.

these are the positive traits of all the souls besides the red soul. when the ball game is won a second time in the conditions for the red flag, a new message appears.

it’s important to note that the ball game can only be played as long as snowdin is not cleared of monsters. if genocide is successful in snowdin, then the snowball will be gone, rendering the ball game useless. this is the only time the ball game cannot be played. in the neutral and pacifist routes, the game can be played even after reaching snowdin or after defeating papyrus.

the mirrors

from the red flag, the phrase “be yourself” is important. the idea of “being yourself” is seen repeatedly throughout the game, so long as the genocide route is not in motion. if frisk is still on the neutral route, frisk can look into the mirror in toriel’s home, and the following is said:

in new home, frisk can look into a second mirror and see the following:

this text appears in every route, except the genocide route. whether this is a reflection of frisk is up to interpretation.

in a pacifist route, after defeating asriel, frisk can look into the mirror in home once more to see this:

one of the most important elements of the pacifist route is the reveal of the protagonist’s true name, frisk. it highlights how frisk’s identity, or even their true self, is only revealed at the end of a pacifist route.

in contrast, the genocide route makes it clear that frisk is not themself from the start.

the red soul’s trait: being yourself

ultimately, the ball game holds the most important clue. the statement seems rather vague, until the one-word limitation is removed and the trait is seen as a phrase.

“being yourself” is seen in two ways in the context of undertale. the first is more obvious, with the phrase referring to how frisk is only themself in the neutral route and pacifist route. once the genocide route is in motion, frisk is no longer in predominant control – chara is. interestingly enough, when chara is in control during the genocide route and the snowdin forest is cleared, the ball game is unavailable, perhaps highlighting the fact that frisk is no longer truly themself.

the second way the virtue of “being yourself” is used in game is by its definition. “being oneself” means to be genuine, honest, or true to one’s character. along with determination, it is what allows frisk to keep going, especially in the pacifist route. sans alludes to this when he judges frisk in the last corridor.

“so as long as you do what’s in your heart” can be seen as another way to say “be true to yourself.” there is another reference to this trait in sans’ judgment should frisk have killed any monster.

while subtle, sans stresses the importance of being true to "yourself,” even in the face of committing a terrible crime.

“being yourself” may seem synonymous with integrity, but there is a difference. integrity is defined as “the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles.” while both are a quality of being honest, there is a difference to what that honesty is towards. those with integrity are righteous, fair, and of good character. however, integrity is not needed to be yourself. being yourself is to stay true to who you are, regardless of what that may be. perhaps a word for this could be “individuality,” “nonconformity,” or “sincerity.”

conclusion

while the other soul virtues are clearly defined by their colour coded trait, the red soul remains much more ambiguous. perhaps this is because frisk, chara, and the player persist as such different individuals despite being intrinsically linked, therefore the common trait between them can only be just that: their individual “true” self.