Scrapbook #16: Hostiles (Click For Full-size Image.)

Tagged by: @nicegoth Tagging:

Name: URL: carletoncolton Nicknames: Jack Birthday: April 25th Gender: Cisgender female Sexual orientation: Panromantic demisexual Height: 5' 4½" Favorite color: Grey Time and date at the moment: 7:44 AM 9/3/2016 Average hours of sleep: Oh, well... if I'm honest it ranges from around seven to thirteen. If you called me a laggard/layabout/loafer I'd have no grounds from which to argue the point. Last thing I Googled: This emoticon: ( ಥ‿ಥ) No comment. One place that makes me happy: Aji Ten. As my family's habitual choice of restaurant for birthday dinners and the like, practically every corner of it's overlaid with the easiest kind of memories, the ones that are all tea and conversation. That, and there's an autographed photo of George Takei underneath their television over which he's scrawled that their food is "galactically delicious". How many blankets I sleep under: Would you believe that I've been blogging in mild apprehension of someone posing this exact question since my first ask meme? And that I've never managed to handwave my way past the presentiment, however unlikely it seemed? Well... it's twenty-four, and I'd have more if I could. As many as I could buy, beg, borrow, filch, abscond with, or outright steal. Altogether they're literally too heavy to sit up under, so I have to lift up one edge of the stack and sort of slither out of bed every morning like a trapdoor spider. All I have to say for myself is that I moved to Michigan from southern Georgia and if I ever get used to the cold then I'm a Dutchman's uncle.

Handblown Glass Fruit Jewellery by GlassBerries

Something strange is going on with the way we talk about feelings. Emotional responses are mocked in some but honored in others. The same people deride millennials and their “safe spaces” where feelings are never hurt, and then fall back on the refrain that “I just feel more secure when I have a gun.” Feelings, it seems, are either a laughable distraction or a crucial decision-making element, depending on who’s having them. The need to feel safe, in particular, is often treated as childish and absurd—but only when coming from people who have actual reason to feel vulnerable. Asking to be recognized as your true gender? It’s all in your head. Asking for accommodations for illness and disability? You’re too sensitive. Recounting experiences of dehumanization because of your race or gender? What an overreaction. But those who want to make the country “safer” by securing the borders against people they perceive as outsiders are never painted as whiners or cowards. The police officers killing unarmed folks in a moment of panic are not mocked for failing to keep their feelings in check. When someone wants a deadly weapon, their desire to feel safe becomes a rugged and real and sexy conviction.

Stop Treating Emotions Like Character Flaws Of The Powerless - The Establishment

(via k-ee-t)

You seem pretty open about this, and I don't know anyone else to ask, but you can ignore this completely if you need to. I think I might be asexual? But I'm not sure. I've never looked and someone and thought sex, and usually sex just sounds meh at best. But I have had it before, and I liked it? Is it possible for me to still be ace, or if not, what am I? Thank you

::puts on Official Asexual hat::

I can’t, despite this fabulous hat, actually make a ruling on your sexual orientation or how you want to identify. But that said: the definition of asexuality, as I understand it, is a sexual orientation that consists of not feeling sexual attraction to anyone. Period. Everything after that is a different question. Your sexual orientation is about who you feel sexually attracted to and if the group of people you feel sexually attracted to is [file not found] then, congratulations, you’re asexual and you are entitled to cake.

I think that a lot of confusion–and especially a lot of the people who basically feel like they want to identify as asexual but don’t qualify–comes from piling two or three different factors onto the identity of asexuality and conflating them, or treating them like the more of those factors you have, the MORE asexual you are, like there is a ~gold star asexual~ class that you only get into if you are attracted to no one, have never had sex, never want to have sex or even think about sex, think sex is totally gross and inexplicable, and never experience sexual urges or sensations. But that’s a whole bunch of other factors getting piled on to a sexual orientation in a way that just demands you fit into a stereotype.

Sexual orientation: What group of people, broadly speaking, do you look at and think: Ooh I want to have sex with you.

If it is people of the opposite gender, heterosexual! Same gender, gay/lesbian/homosexual as applies in your case! Two or more genders, bisexual or pansexual or omnisexual or some other word according to fine gradations of meaning and gender identity and so on! If nobody, ever, asexual! If very few people, very rarely, generally for reasons other than physical/gender characteristics, demisexual or gray-asexual!

Sexual behavior: Do you have sex? Have you ever? Do you masturbate? How?

These are all super prone to be influenced by circumstances! Maybe you’re really young or you have moral/religious/emotional/psychological/etc reasons to refrain from having sex. This doesn’t mean you can’t belong to ANY of the sexual orientations listed above; you can absolutely be gay or straight or bi or pan before you’ve had sex with anybody, or if you’re currently not having sex.

Maybe you are or were in a relationship with somebody, of any gender, who did or didn’t belong to the group of people you find you’re sexually attracted to, and you had sex with them–because they wanted to, because you wanted to for reasons other than sexual attraction, because you thought you would find you liked it once you tried it, because you didn’t really think about reasons and it just seemed like a good idea at the time.

That ALSO doesn’t mean that you automatically belong or don’t belong to any sexual orientation listed above. Gay people experiment or even wind up in lifelong sexual relationships with people of the opposite sex for various reasons; straight people have sex once or many times with people of their own gender; bisexuals do not have to perpetually have sex with people of both genders to still be really bi; asexuals can have sex and still be asexual.

[There is not a good word for this one–Sexual enjoyment, maybe?]: Quite aside from how skilled you or your partner are, do you basically LIKE the sexual behavior you engage in, if any? 

There are a bunch of variations to this–some people just really really like sex even when it doesn’t result in orgasms, some people think sex is gross and unpleasant even when it’s taking place in a loving relationship and technically everything is going great, even when they’re masturbating in exactly the way they prefer. For some people this dislike or discomfort might come from trauma or social conditioning that sex is dirty or wrong, but for lots of people it’s just how they feel! THERE IS NO INNATE REASON WHY THIS SHOULD CORRELATE TO WHO YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO. A person could be attracted to everyone in the world and still think the actual act of sex involving their own actual body is really gross and unpleasant and not desired, or a person could never be attracted to anyone and still find themselves having a rad time when they decide to get it on, and every variation in between. And a person could find sex with other people super DNW but enjoy the hell out of masturbating. We don’t really have a standard word for people who REALLY REALLY ENJOY sex (or not a non-insulting one); people who don’t enjoy sex at all are called sex-repulsed.

Sexual drive: How often do you find yourself wanting to have sex or masturbate? 

For some people, ALL THE TIME, for some people, never. For MOST people, this varies with hormonal shifts/age/psychological and emotional factors, etc. And again this is separate from who you are attracted to, separate from whether you act on those urges (or choose to have sex in the absence of any physical urge), separate from how much you enjoy engaging in sexual activity if/when you do. This is the one that people are thinking of when they ask if your asexuality is being caused by your meds/thyroid/whatever. But again, having zero libido could happen to somebody who’s actively attracted to all kinds of people, and having a constant urge to get busy could happen to someone who’s not attracted to anyone–even to someone who’s not attracted to anyone and is sex-repulsed, etc.

SO IN CONCLUSION: sexual identity is complicated! Sexual behavior is driven by lots of factors! But if you’re not attracted to anyone, the word for that is asexual, and there’s no wrong way to be asexual. You just are if you are.

fic:

me:

Help would be appreciated.

If any Star Trek fans could fill out my anonymous questionnaire (here), it would be greatly appreciated. It’s for a major assessment at school, so I would prefer if it were kept to serious responses. A summary of responses is provided upon completing the questionnaire, or may be seen here.

Thanks.

I'm not from America so I don't get what happened to Brown...

Michael Brown, described by his teachers as a ‘gentle giant’, was an eighteen year old who had just graduated high school, saying to one of his friends ‘we made it' and telling him that “he wasn’t going to end up like some people on the streets. He was going to get an education. He was going to make his life a whole a lot better." 

On the 9th of August, 2014, a Saturday, Michael and a friend, Dorian Johnson, whose account can be seen in the link, were walking down Canfield Drive to Michaels grandmothers house when a police vehicle cut them off. 

According to Johnson, the police officer, named Darren Wilson "approached us, and as he pulled up on the side of us, he didn’t say ‘freeze,’ ‘halt,’ or nothing like we were committing a crime. He said, ‘Get the f—- on the sidewalk!’ I told the officer we were not but a minute away from the destination.” 

The official reason the police officer approached them was because of jaywalking, which was stated by Police Chief Jackson: "Police Chief Thomas Jackson said Wilson did not initially make a connection between the robbery and Brown … Wilson stopped Brown and a friend because "they were in the middle of the street, blocking traffic," Jackson said."

What happened next is of contention - witnesses have their accounts as do the police and Darren Wilson - but what can be certain is that there was a physical struggle between Michael and Wilson, as there was Michaels DNA found inside the car

Wilson states "punches started flying" but I find it odd that a 289 pound, 6’4 man in his prime didn’t create more damage to Wilsons face. It’s odd that there is hardly any swelling when a man who is 80 pounds heavier than Wilson, and has the advantage of being outside the car, is punching the officers face so much so that Wilson felt like his life was threatened, no? 

Brown was also UNARMED, as he reportedly stated numerous times to Officer Wilson. 

The first shot was then fired, smashing the glass and Michael began to flee. At some point, Michael was hit in the arm and turned to face Wilson, his hands up and saying "don’t shoot" before being shot a collective six times, with one fatal shot to the head, including the eye.

Wilson estimated that "Brown ran 20-30 feet away from the car and then charged another 10 feet back towards him." But Brown died 150 feet away from the car. It’s impossible that he charged another 10 feet. 

Wilson describing the altercation before Michael was killed: “The only way I can describe it, it [Michael] looks like a demon, that’s how angry he looked. He comes back towards me again with his hands up.” It. He called Michael ‘it’. And a demon. Does that not give some indication to what Wilson was thinking when he killed Michael? 

@TheePharoah then tweets “I JUST SAW SOMEONE DIE OMG” with a link to a picture of Wilson standing over Browns body, but I will not link that. 

Browns body was left on the street for 4 and a half hours. No ambulance was called. The police didn’t even let Michaels mother see the body of her son. She later talked to reporters at the scene. 

In the later afternoon, this image of Browns stepfather went viral on twitter, holding a sign saying ‘FERGUSON POLICE JUST EXECUTED MY UNARMED SON’ 

Antonio French provided coverage via twitter and vine when no one else was in the hours after Michaels death (x) (x) (x) (x)

Peaceful Protests occurred in the following days on the streets of Ferguson. The protestors were blasted with tear gas and were ran out of the streets by a militarised police force. 

A no fly zone was put into place, the media were forced to leave, and protests were banned by the police force in the next few days. 

August 15th, Ferguson Police Dept. release a tape they brand as Michael Brown robbing a local convenience store by stealing $48 worth of cigarillos. Police didn’t include this footage which shows Michael Brown paying for the cigarillos.  Wilson also didn’t complete an incident report, which is against the law. 

Store owner states through his lawyer that he, nor his employees, called 9/11 about the ‘petty theft’ and that the Ferguson Police Dept. had requested the tape days after Michael was murdered. 

Store owner attorney states: “Whatever the police are looking for on the surveillance tape, has nothing to do with what went on in the street.”

November 24th: After nearly four months of paid leave, in which time a fundraiser for Darren Wilson raised over $400,000, Wilson got married, a Grand Jury came to their decision to not indict Darren Wilson. Here is the transcript for those sittings, including every piece of evidence used. Here are all the ‘facts’. They had been hearing evidence since August 20th. A Grand Jury’s decision to not indict is extremely rare, about 0.006% of cases aren’t indicted as of 2010

Some other interesting links: Conflict of interest with the Prosecuting Attorney that hints at bias, the rarity of a Grand Jury not indicting, leader of the KKK admits to off the record contact with the police, Anonymous has evidence that Darren Wilson has a connection to the KKK, Darren Wilson racially profiled before he killed Michael Brown

If you want to help, there are a variety of ways you can: this campaign for bail for ferguson protestors, change.com petition against police violence, sign this ‘we the people’ petition, sign this petition to take the case to the supreme court, donate to Ferguson library which is open despite the schools being closed, watch livestreams and by spreading information of what’s going on in Ferguson - talk about DeAndre Joshua, 20, who was killed in the riots yesterday while in his car. Talk about Michael Brown. Spread information about the protests, about how to protect yourself from tear gas, about their innate human rights. Support the protestors, and support the black community. 

I know I’m missing stuff, so if there is anything else I’m missing, or you think should be added, please do. If anything is found to be offensive, please message me and I’ll make changes to the links. 

17 Questions

Rules: Answer these 17 questions and then tag 17 people to do the same.

Tagged: @the-halo-of-my-memory (Thank you~ 👉😉👉💖)

1) Nickname(s): Jack

2) Height: 5' 4½"... The inclusion of the half-inch suggests some amount of height insecurity, I know, but—hear me out ☝️—what with my (maternal) great-grandfather and grandmother both being career carpenters, it’d probably curdle my blood to provide inaccurate measurements.

3) Amount of Sleep I Got: Just under 10 hours.

4) Lucky Number: 3 and/or 9

5) Zodiac: Taurus ♉

6) Aesthetic: Second-Generation Goth 💀🖤

7) What I'm Wearing: A blue floral print housecoat with white lace at the collar and cuffs. *mutters* And I’m already undermining my goth credentials, incredible... 😌 🌼

8) Dream Job: In this economy? Anything that’ll keep me financially solvent.

9) Favorite Author(s): Jane Austen, Arthur Conan Doyle, Zora Neale Hurston, F. Scott Fitzgerald

10) Song Stuck in My Head: Dua Saleh - mOth

11) Favorite Song: Peppino Gagliardi - Che Vuole Questa Musica Stasera

12) Favorite Instrument(s): Plucked string instruments. My (paternal) grandmother had a lap harp that she used to prop up her romance novels on the shelf and the looks I lavished on that thing likely outdid the ones exchanged between their pages.

13) Favorite Animal: Cats 🐈

14) Favorite Animal Noise: That trilling little chirp cats make when they greet you. 

15) Following: 1,205 tumblrs

16) Last Thing I Looked Up: "1/2 symbol"

17) Random: “You kiss me with your mouth wide open like you're not afraid of swallowing poison. I taste the good and bad in you and want them both. We call this bravery.” - Anita Ofokansi, Literary Sexts

Tagging: @therealmnemo @fandomn00blr @heartsyhawk @the-horae @jellydishes (But only if you'd like~ ✍️✨)

Ten Songs Meme

Tagged: @jellydishes ⁌ ⁍ (Thank you~ 🎧🤍📻)

put your playlist on shuffle and list the first 10 songs, then tag 10 people

1: Outta My Mind - Monsune

2: Love Lockdown - Trevor Something

3: Sorry - Meg Myers (Ethnikids Remix)

4: Tayf (Ghost) - Mashrou’ Leila

5: I Can’t Let You Go - 52nd Street

6: Dorian Electra - Career Boy

7: Lover Chanting - Little Dragon

8: DNA - Kendrick Lamar (Yung Bae Remix)

9: Lucifer - Sadluci

10: She Has a Lover - Turquoise Jeep ft. Pierre Cashmere & Slick Mahoney

Tagging: @5lazarus @calenhads @noswordstyle @bengalaas @heartsyhawk (But only if you’d like~ 🎶👏😌🎵) and all other interested parties. @ me in your posts if you try it out!