Freebee303 - Camera Man

”are they a dwarf or a dwarrowdam?” girl they’re stealing your shit watch out!!

lotr but nobody knows anything about the other races

Pippin thinks Legolas is a woman

Boromir is convinced that the hobbits are all 15 max

Everyone thinks that Merry and Pippin are twins, except for Legolas, who is convinced the hobbits are quadruplets

Sam thinks that Aragorn, Boromir and Legolas don't have to eat to survive

Legolas doesn't mention things he sees or hears because he thinks the others have noticed them too and just assumes they have a plan

Pippin complains that he is hungry and Legolas just gives him a handful of grass. Pippin is so confused that he just takes it, and now Legolas tries to figure out what hobbits can eat by just giving them random shit, like

Things the hobbits have accepted and likely eaten later (a list by legolas)

-Grass - Leaves

-Stones - a hair tie

-A feather - one of Gimli's shoes

The hobbits and Gimli just assume that this is what elves eat

Whenever I can’t do my work, but I can’t find a way past my writers block, I make a new Fandom Wiki for one of my fics.

The first time I did so it went from procrastination to hyper-fixation on learning how to source code my wikis.

Has anybody else procrastinated so hard you learnt how to code?

Never related with something more in my life

Bilbo baggins is so cool I wish I could get high with him

never forget when saruman literally told gandalf "you've been smoking too much weed bro"

As much as I like the Hobbit movies in their own right, I love the books a lot more.

So when I’m writing Legolas and Tauriel by choice into my fics, I have fun with it.

Cause screw ‘high and mighty awesome Legolas’ that’s not who he is, he’s a childish little twink who falls head over heels in love with a Dwarf.

I also like fixing his and Tauriel relationship. In my stories Legolas follows her around like a little duckling, he follows her lead when they’re outside the palace.

She’s fixing her bow in front of the fire while his heads in her lap, whining about how weird and overbearing his dad is. He’s glancing up at her whenever he’s talking to someone new, waiting for her nod of approval.

They are Exasperated Big Sister and Autistic Homeschooled Little Brother fr and I fw it.

Me: *strapped to a chair in a cold interrogation room with a middle aged man pacing back and forth*

Him: *projects a picture of Sam and Frodo on to the wall* What is their relationship?

Me: Their ship is valid and very cute, but we should also consider the idea that their admiration and respect for one another is a deep, platonic bond. Love doesn't always have to be romantic, and it is important for men to be able to express their platonic care for one another in a way that toxic masculinity doesn't currently allow.

Him: Okay *projects a picture of Legolas and Gimli* what's their relatio-

Me: They're fucking.

The Witch King's very bad day continues.