I Know This Is Wrong And I Know I Have A Problem About Thinking This Way But...

I know this is wrong and I know i have a problem about thinking this way but...

I was in a hospital. And i remembered about someone saying being in a hospital can make you appreciate life more. Seeing all those people fighting for there life and that every second every minute every hour and every day is important to them especially when you know you dont have enough time or time.

But for me... After i saw thse people i wish that i could just give them my life maybe just maybe they would've done better things using that life. I've wish that my life would just end a lot of times, an that i haven't even done something special in my life. And that I've did a lot of bad things about my body physically and that I'm already tired mentally and i don't eeven know what to value in my life or is there even something to value from.

Just wanted to say...