I Need To See Some Transition Timelines From Fat Transmascs / Nonbinary Folks / Others On Low Dose Testosterone

body sculptures by GarlicSunshine (2)

they should invent something transformative and rewarding that happens inside my comfort zone

maybe this time picking at Textures on my skin will lead to being silky smooth

I wear the ring you gave me on the opposite hand

I get tattoos without you

but your memory haunts the ink

piercing

dark

it was a life lesson learned

a decision changed

a future imagined but scribbled out

I don’t think it was worth it,

actually

and I don’t think

you have any idea

how much you took from me—

no one does.

to admit that

is to ask

a harder question:

is

there

anything

left for me?

lowkey things are shaping up to be pretty odd

does anyone know if you can get in trouble for feeling weird

Everyone playing the "what kind of queer is MOST oppressed?" game is wasting their time on pointless bullshit, and, quite frankly, they're doing the feds' work for them.

Stand together or die together. They want to put us all in the same pit.

Love complimenting strangers' outfits. They always smile so hard. It's like, haha I got you, bitch. You've fallen for my manipulations of Making Your Day. Yeah walk away from me all happy. I got your ass

twenty-eight laps around the sun later,

mercurially aligned,

I am

refusing to fall

apart this time—

at least,

not as if I haven’t walked this path before.

I know

I know

I can survive this one.

I can breathe

through

it— it’s

less than 12 months

from the day

you asked me to marry you

and it hurts so bad I can’t breathe

but I

am not going

to give up

or to kill myself over this

bullshit.

not your bullshit,

not again.