happinesswillruinthisplace

Latest Posts by happinesswillruinthisplace

It always upsets me so much when I see interpretations/illustrations of the two headed calf poem that show a living calf being torn away from its mother and killed to sell to a museum and framing the poem as being "humanity kills beautiful things for being different".

Two headed cows almost never survive more than a few hours after their birth. The farmer finds the *body* the next day. The calf was destined to die, and that's a tragedy, but for the time it was alive, it had a beautiful and unique experience.

It's not a poem about the cruelty of man. It's a poem about the beauty of life in an indifferent universe. It's about purpose and beauty being able to exist even in an existence doomed to come to an end, as all our lives are. It's not a poem about how a calf dies, but how, even for only a brief moment, it was alive.

And, for that moment, because of that life, however fleeting, the sky had twice as many stars.

I WAS A CHILD

HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO A CHILD

Mourning for a childhood that was never possible

When one single thing goes wrong and you’re about to have a breakdown in the lobby of a university building

It feels so lonely

Kinda sucks that I’ve made a fucking vent blog a week before I was supposed to start therapy but w/e it’s not like things work out

Anyways I don’t think I can actually get my mom to sign the insurance forms for therapy so I guess I’ll just have to cancel that

Do you feel safe at home?

lies over lies over lies over lies over lies

Just another sleepless night locked in my bathroom. Passively suicidal and remembering just in time I can’t reach a crisis line. I wish I didn’t feel like this