I Hate When I Say Things Like "oh I Want An Ipod Classic But With Bluetooth So I Can Use Wireless Headphones"

I'm so bad at other accents cause when I try to do others it feels like I'm cheating on my normal New Hampshire accent

hey everyone its april fools. but dont worry i dont have anything planned. just going to sit here and...

I LIED !!!! GET PRANKED

POST BELOW ME GET FUCKING WET

The back left side of my mouth hurts are wisdom teeth a thing that happens at 15 normally

POV: the whole justice league is revealing their secret identities to each other and it's Shazam's turn, and he's been hiding that he's a kid.

S = Shazam

Green Lantern: Ok your turn Shazam, who are you?

S: Umm before I take off my costume, there's something you should know. If you're Shazam, then when you're Shazam you're the same age, no matter what. Whatever age you usually are. And- um. So- oh, I'll just show you. Shazam!

Wonder Woman: You are a child!

S: Debatable.

Superman: How old are you?

S: Shazam! Now I'm like 24.

Green Lantern: Doesn't even know how old he is as Shazam...

S: Shazam!

Flash, walking in: Wait are we revealing identities? Why was I not invited? Who's the kid?

the thing is that childhood doesn't just end when you turn 18 or when you turn 21. it's going to end dozens of times over. your childhood pet will die. actors you loved in movies you watched as a kid will die. your grandparents will die, and then your parents will die. it's going to end dozens and dozens of times and all you can do is let it. all you can do is stand in the middle of the grocery store and stare at freezers full of microwave pizza because you've suddenly been seized by the memory of what it felt like to have a pizza party on the last day of school before summer break. which is another ending in and of itself

Are you using Data right now?

The average amount of days per month on which it rains where I'm from is 6 or 7. Today is rain day #24.

It's been raining off n' on round here all week. The lake is swallowing the beach and the calm, usually peaceful river is now class 5 rapids and impossible to hear yourself over. My grandpa's garden is prob gonna flood. The road is washed out and pavement is missing. Sand piled up so bad people can't leave their driveways. Flash flood warning. We're expecting another inch today. And here we are being sarcastic about it. New England, folks

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

@fairycosmos / Comic by @shhhitsfine / Comic by @incendavery