I'm A Little Late To The Party But Happy Birthday Jason Todd!!!

Bruce, calmly: WHO PUT SLIME IN THE BATMOBLIE

Duke, immediately: it was Dick

Bruce: *staring at Dick with That Face*

Dick: NO IT WASN’T- BRUCE WAIT- I CAN EXPLAIN

Duke: *slips out of room unnoticed*

-

Duke, in front of a camera: it was me. i put the slime in the batmobile.

Bruce in a stretched out Nightwing suit:

Tim: Bruce Thomas Wayne, take that shit off NOW! Your bones are CREAKING trying to replicate Dick’s flips

Bruce: Bludhaven needs Nightwing

Tim: The seams are ripping on that costume, get out and let me put the stupid suit on, you don’t have the ass to be Nightwing

Bruce: I’ll have you know I was named sexiest man alive for three years straight! My ass is perfectly fine!

!!!!!!!!!

“Oh yes, Oh yes, the both reached for the gun”

Except the gun is Robin. It’s Batman against his enemies- who will always try and use his children against him.

Went into record store this week and decided to slap them onto Please Please Me

lmao me

bros having a Day

I think it’d be so funny if Bruce just refuses to disclose the existence of Robin to the league. He knows it’d take less than a minute for them to form a wicked mock club against him.

Except he just? Carries Robin around. Under that endless void that is his cape. Clark pinches the stress point between his brows. “Batman, is that a child under your cape?”

“No.”

“Bruce I can HEAR his heartbeat.”

“I think the long exposure to kryptonite partially damaged your brain. There is no child here, Clark.”

“He’s literally drinking Barry’s coffee right now.”

“He’s WHAT-“

It's nice when there are parallels between Bruce Wayne and Batman. For instance:

Exhibit A) Bruce Wayne, human disaster

Exhibit B) Batman, bat-human disaster:

Poster hung up in Bruce's bedroom.

HAHHAHAAHAAAHHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAG