The Sunshine One And The Grumpy One

Fuck, marry, kill?

The best ships do all three.

the thing about supernatural is that, if it were real, hunting as a subculture would have a lot in common with biker and cowboy culture. it already does, aesthetically and as a lifestyle. and that means that it would be full of gay men, or at least gay sex. if supernatural were accurate men would’ve been cruising day and night at Ellen’s roadhouse and Bobby/Rufus would’ve been real. unfortunately no one involved in this goddamn show except maybe late-stage Misha Collins understood that they were making a show about queer masculinity’s place within the American gothic. tragic. many such cases.

The tough thing about boundaries is that it’s not enough to state them, you have to enforce them.

I think some folks see “setting boundaries” as a kind of magic talisman to influence other people’s behavior. “I’ll tell you what I need or can’t accept, and you will act accordingly.” And sometimes that’s what happens, and that’s great! But if the other person disregards your stated boundaries, it doesn’t mean setting boundaries didn’t work.

Because boundaries aren’t about others’ behavior, they’re about your own. If the other person’s behavior doesn’t change, then yours has to. “Please don’t discuss [x topic] with me” is a request. “If you continue to talk about [x topic] then I will end this conversation/hang up/leave” is a boundary, which you must then enact. The point is less about stopping the other person (although that’s ideal) and more about protecting yourself. And you have to be committed to protecting yourself, because no one else will be.

You have to be so committed that you’re willing to tolerate other people being hurt or angry or uncomfortable. You have to accept that some relationships might change. You have to hold onto the idea that it’s all right for them to change, because the way they were before was hurting you, and you deserve to not be hurt. You gave them a choice: maintain a relationship or keep doing the thing that hurts you, and they chose to keep hurting you, so if the situation is now awkward or unpleasant that was because of their choice. Enforcing boundaries means deciding that if someone is going to feel bad here, it need not be always and only you.

There is no magic formula that will make other people treat you kindly and respectfully. But you can learn to treat yourself with kindness and respect. That’s what enforcing a boundary is.

Fondly remembering the time that a cat owner casually entered their calico Maine Coon in a cat fancier’s competition and the judges lost their minds because the cat was 1) male and 2) able to bear children

How I sleep knowing I'll never be queerbaited by IWTV because there isn't a single heterosexual character in the show

i love london

This campaign defies censorship in social media to raise awareness for early detection of breast cancer

It's crazy that these strikes are happening given that all the writers and actors are asking for is less than 0.3% of the revenue these studios make.