httpsjamie

Latest Posts by httpsjamie

Do you ever feel like you're alone? But then you get trapped inside your own head to prevent you from blowing a fuse, crying, etc?

Because I'm like that. I'm afraid to connect with others, although I have friends, I can't tell them anything about how I feel because I'm afraid it'll be used against me or they'll tell someone.

So, instead, I play out different versions of the same scenario in my head while listening to music so I can get some closure. (And sometimes it works)

I think of different versions so then when, or rather if I tell my friends or family, I can prepare myself for how they may respond.

It never really works, but I do it anyway because I've made it a habit. And I hate it and love it at the same time.

I hate it because it's time-consuming and most people will likely call me crazy.

And I love it because I feel safe.

It's a bad habit to get yourself into, but I'm doing it, and I don't know how to stop. Furthermore, I'm going to try and better myself, priorize myself better, respect myself as well as others, try to open up more, and distract myself from being stuck in my own head.

It's gonna be hard and a long process, but I'm willing to do it.