Jacking Off Like A Software Engineer

🦀

Post corrections/clarifications are my favorite genre of humor: a compilation

This is the first time I noticed Travis in the background, and he is lowkey enjoying the drama

Is this not how every scene between them went? 

sorry i covered your neck in dark hickeys and clamped down hard on your throat like limp prey while i was giving you a handjob. you whimpered a little too soft and i blacked out and believed myself to be a feral dog in possession of an entire rotisserie chicken

I was baking a strawberry shortcake for my mom when I realized that I forgot the baking powder. I began to panic so I pulled the cakes out of the oven; they were already completely baked but they rose just fine without the baking powder? I was staring at them in confusion, trying to remember if I accidentally put yeast in the batter, when I felt a shadow loom over me. I looked over my shoulder only to find Luigi. Luigi tenderly took my hands and told me, “You need not worry, for I will accompany you in any and all of your baking endeavors.” I have never felt more loved in my life. I cried.

If Zuko was around during the fortune teller episode, he'd have 100% believed everything she said like Katara did. He's always talking about destiny and when he did have the opportunity to kill Ozai, he didn't solely because of his belief its the avatar's duty.

Katara and Zuko get on Aang, Aunt Wu and Sokka’s nerves with HOW MUCH they keep going to her.

Katara: She said my lover's going to be a strong bender👉👈

Zuko: Mine is apparently someone super smart😳👀. Also I'm supposed to eat papaya for safety.

Katara: SAME!!!

The zukka spin on it is Sokka absolutely does not buy it, but also he wants to know what Zuko’s love life prediction is for tooootally no reason at all(he's trying to fit into the descriptor). Also Zuko’s kinda worried about Sokka after his reading and is trying to very subtly(and failing) to keep him from dying.

Sokka: I'm going with Aang to the giant volcano to prove that the loser over there risked nothing for the panda lily

Zuko’s head ringing with 'mostly self-inflicted': That’s so dumb, I'm coming with you.

This is by far my favorite screencap of Odo.

Just -

yo look at my lawyer bro im gonna go to jail