“Fake Your Death” They Literally Basically Gave Us Their Game Plan And All Of Us Were Too Busy Crying

I love it when people tell me about me because I have no idea who I am

AGUST D

there are so many important messages that suga is trying to convey to his listeners through his mixtape and im sure that if you’ve read the lyric translations, you definitely know what i mean. i am seriously blown away that we’ve been fans of bts for what, 3 years now? for 3 years, ARMYs have easily labelled yoongi as ‘lazy’, given him that ‘idagf’ image, and yet, we were oblivious to so many of his hardships. we’ve always known that he’s hardworking, more quiet than the other members, and more reflective, but this mixtape honestly blew me away because yoongi’s gone through so much in his idol career and we had no idea. 

first off, he touches on a sensitive topic that idols don’t speak openly about: mental health. he raps about seeing a psychiatrist, battling with depression, self-hate, experiencing social phobia since age 18, putting on a front, and loneliness. His entire song “The Last” really touches on this:

a word said like habit, oh, I don’t give a shit, I don’t give a fuck those words are all words I use to hide my weak self that time I want to erase, that’s right, the memories I want to erase of that day I had that concert I was afraid of people, so I hid in the bathroom and stared at myself

and in “So Far Away”:

I’m in so much pain and lonliness but people around me keeping telling me to regain my consciousness I try to vent my anger but I only got myself so what’s the point of venting my anger I’m scared to open my eyes everyday and start breathing

these lyrics from ‘At Dawn’ also illustrate this:

I pretend I’m not lonely, I pretend I’m not suffering I pretend I’m okay for no reason, meaninglessly I pretend to be strong don’t come over the wall I’ve put up in front of myself don’t throw me off this island in this wide sea 

he also talks about his struggles during his trainee days and i dont think he’s ever talked in depth about this period of his life. this mixtape gives us some insight about him moving to seoul, getting a part time job to afford the cost of living in the city, going to school dead tired after work, and still training with big hit to live out his dreams

was I needy for success? No just needy for money it’d been a long time since I forgot the words ‘in style’ I practiced at night and went to my part time job at dawn then even if I dragged that tired body to school I just slept I became 20 that way, the sight of the graduation room was suspicious

and the fact that he admits he puts up a front:

I hide the self that’s behind my defensive posture I hide myself completely like I’ve become a criminal, always I can’t even take one step outside the dorm that’s like a prison 

all of these are reasons im so moved. because it really highlights how idols only show one side of themselves to the camera, and fans can never really know them fully. we only know the version of bts’ min yoongi that he wants to show us through shows and broadcasts. 

behind every idol rapper who succeeds there’s a weak self standing, it’s a little dangerous I fall sometimes again into depression and compulsion hell no, anyway I don’t even know if that’s the real me

but through his music? through his mixtape, he’s trying to show us another side of him, and i’m so thankful that he’s opened up to his worldwide audience. this takes courage. talking openly about your hardships and your weaknesses to people who look up to you, that takes some damn courage. so thank you, yoongi, for opening up to your fans. 

Something I think is neat and really cute about fanfic is that there’s a personal version of each character in it? Like, each writer focuses on different traits and qualities and even though there can be a hundred fics with the same character, they’re really not exactly the same.

So even if you and I are writing a fic with the same characters, they can still be uniquely different despite having the same core and they’re each dear to us personally as our take on the person.

I don’t know, I just think it’s cute that each writer cherishes these characters in personal and unique ways.

the euphoria of it all……..

Burn Notice. [S1.E1: Pilot.]

Can you imagine how proud Gerard must be? He was a drug addict and an alcoholic for years. He was suicidal and he thought he was never going to make it past 25. But now it’s his 40th birthday, he has an amazing wife and a cute daughter, he’s finally accomplishing his dreams as a comic book writer and he’s very happy. He made it and he inspires thousands of people every day, because if he can do it, so can we.

With that being said, let’s all wish this wonderful man a happy birthday and stop judging him for not looking like his 27 year old self.

i’m in this very odd bubble 

like logically, i know i have a lot to do

but like, emotionally, i’m just.. not.. registering it??? i’m not so much calm but like.. standing in a sound proof fishbowl watching all of my obligations press their faces to the glass, yelling and knocking, and like, my homework and emails are teaming up to make a battering ram and my job is trying to tunnel under and i’m just standing here watching it all in muffled, deaf silence like “ok”

ohhhhhh I truly cannot get over the EVIL GENIUS of having crowley make a point of immediately taking his sunglasses off every time he's in the bookshop or alone with aziraphale this season, showing just how comfortable he's become showing his emotions and his vulnerability to aziraphale since season 1, opening himself up completely at every opportunity, showing us a side of him that's remained almost entirely hidden for millennia, only for him to silently and purposefully put his sunglasses back on immediately once aziraphale rejects his love confession. like, bravo gaiman, I saw what you did there and I'm never going to fucking recover from it. well done

get you a man who can do both