I Think My Favorite Thing About Tim And Bernard Is Just How In Love Tim Is With Bear. Usually In Civilian

(Shot opens in Magicians Meeting Hall)

Captain Marvel: *strolls inside toward his seat and unpacks from his little satchel. Stops and greets other magic-users before pulling out notebooks and pencils*

(Cut to Billy on the couch)

Billy: So, over the weekend, I might’ve made a slightly impulsive decision

(Cut back to CM unpacking a mug that reads *#1 DAD!*)

Billy: I mean, I don’t regret it. I just wish I didn’t have to keep my identity a secret, ya know?

(Cuts to Cap smiling at the mug)

(Cuts back to Billy on the couch)

Billy: *holding a photo of Conner/Kon-El(Superboy)This is my son. Isn’t he great? He can already leap tall buildings in a single bound!

(Cuts back to Meeting Hall. Camera pans to New God Metron, swiping away at unreadable documents)

(Cuts to Metron on the couch)

Metron: It’s real. It’s all real. I don’t even…I don’t understand what is going on inside that head of his

(Cut to Satanus in the Meeting Hall, doing his damn best to not laugh)

(Cut to Satanus on the couch)

Satanus: He’s—Pfft—He’s grown up so much! I actually—Shit, I can’t wait to tell Blaze about this.

(Cuts to Blaze on the couch)

Lady Blaze: 😦

Lady Blaze: You’re kidding

(Everyone watches Marvel sip water from the mug. He stares back)

Captain Marvel: What?

Fate: Nothing. Nothing at all

Captain Marvel: You sure?

(Camera pans to Metron, still swiping)

Captain Marvel: He doesn’t look so good.

(Cuts to Billy on the couch)

Billy: he actually reminds me of my uncle after he has too much beer, but I don’t want to seem rude. I’m a dad now.

(Cuts to Satanus on the couch)

Satanus: He actually said that? No, he actually said that?

(Cuts to Billy on the couch)

Billy: I’m gonna be. The best. Dad. Ever. No other dad will dad like I dad.

(Cuts to Satanus on the couch)

Satanus: *laughing too much to be human* Please—Please don’t—Make it stop! I can’t!

Day 5 of Billy Batson week, this one is dedicated to all the 12 year old Dad Billy AU’s out there, especially when Kon’s the one being adopted

Also I really want to know what the salary of a justice leaguer would be, is it a 401k? Can it support one person or a family? Or is it just above minimum wage? Do they even get dental?

DPXDC Community Service Mentor

After Dan's redemption arc and subsequent chilling out, the observants still feel he hasn't paid back for what he ruined, and decided that rather than incarcerate a perfectly nice guy, he's going to have mandatory community service.

And thus, Dan Phantom is shunted off into the mentor program for shitty powerhouses known as Marvel Duty.

So when Billy Batson is chosen and meets his new head mates, he's faced with morally questionable mythical figures such as Zeus, Hercules, Solomon, Atlas, Achilles, Mercury and,,, some guy named Dan???? Who, for the record, gives horrible life advice.

-

Billy: Batman kinda scares me.

Dan: oh, he's one of the easier ones, actually. Just go after him first real quick when he has no reason to suspect you, worked real well.

Billy, very concerned: ...what?

Dan, doesn't realize how insane that was: what?

-

Billy: How do I get rid of this rogue? He's really persistent!

Dan: kill him.

Billy: NO!

-

Dan: That rich guy, the Wayne one.

Billy: yeah?

Dan: don't let him get your genetic material, crazy billionaires are an epidemic.

Billy: what the hell happened to you?

-

Flash: so what were the crusades like, did you participate on either side?

Billy, put on the spot and panicking: uhhhh

Dan: say you were in China, Kublai Khan was trying to relive his grandfather's glory.

Billy awkward as hell: oh I was in China for that. Kublai and all that jazz.

Billy: were you alive in ancient China? You sound American?

Dan: I am, time travel.

Billy, confused: oh...

Jared: I want to wake up with you for the rest of my life

Kim: I wake up at five

Jared: I want to fall asleep with you..

daniel molloy character of all time once again: like imagine you’re a 20-something drug addict and a terrible journalist on account of being 20-something and a drug addict and you randomly meet a vampire at a gay bar and you think wow I might get drugs, gay sex and a story out of this and instead what you get is psychologically and physically tortured by his husband and your memories of it all erased and then 50 years later you’re DYING and those vampires show up in your life again to ask you to write the story of their happy marriage and your memory might be fucked but ON GOD you WILL ruin that marriage if it’s the last thing you do. and then not only do you succeed and walk out of it alive, but also with a bestseller, millions in your bank account AND immortality AND the knowledge that your annoying human ass was somehow the one thing that made that 500+ year old predator so mad that he broke his lifetime vow to never turn anyone. AND, on top of that, you’re out of the CLOSET.

Thinking about the design decisions that led to Amy Rose being a bruiser character.

The first appearance of Amy's hammer was in Sonic the Fighters, a fighting game. This was her first playable appearance, and her first time fighting. And there you can see the first decision. She was likely given the hammer because the designers thought it would be unfair to make the girl character fight barehanded against the largely male cast. So she was given a weapon: an appropriately cartoony hammer. This remained her main method of self defense in Sonic Adventure.

Note how in these earlier depictions, the hammer looks more like a toy than an actual weapon. It's not meant to actually be threatening, it's just something to put her on equal grounds with the other characters, since the perception at the time was that a girl character wouldn't be able to fight as well as the male characters.

As we move into more modern and less cartoony depictions of the Sonic universe however, the piko hammer got redesigned. They didn't change its size at all, but maybe someone on staff thought the toy look was too silly, because they made it look more metallic and heavy as the years went on.

But this does change things. Because taken with its new look and realistic weight... that is a freakishly big hammer, and utilizing it the way Amy does would require incredible strength. So, in the modern day, her mastery of the hammer is treated more as a sign of her inherent power, rather than a bandaid for a power differential like a smaller weapon would be. While often still referred to as a "speed" type character, she's regularly depicted as a character whose physical strength rivals Knuckles or even Shadow. As we move later in the franchise, character descriptions regularly call her "powerful."

It's interesting how this shift happened, when really nothing about Amy's depicted abilities has changed. What changed is how realistically the Sonic universe is depicted, as it moved away from slapstick comedy. In that new context, the girl with the big hammer suddenly becomes a lot more intimidating.

Hiccstrid is crazy because it's Hiccup "would kill for her" Haddock and Astrid "would die for him" Hofferson, not the other way round.

Yeah in any other case it's Hiccup 'would die for a cause/person' and Astrid 'would kill for cause/person' but when it comes to each other? Hiccup has canonically been ready to kill for Astrid, as in blast-a-man-to-bits with Toothless and let a nearly extinct dragon be slaughtered. And whenever Hiccup is in danger and Astrid is there she's the one who pushes him out of the way, endangering herself. Like with the Death Song, the Light Fury, girl was ready to sacrifice herself for the young chief.

I just think it's cool how much these two love each other they're willing to go farther than they ever would in any other occasion.

"What are you, a cop?" and "Now you see me now you don't" both sound interesting

For "What are you, a cop?"

Billy is deaged (actually deaged. He goes from 15 to 10 or something and doesnt remeber the league) during a mission. He suddenly woke up in the middle of a battle so he's freaked out. the Justice League take down the threat then try to calm the boy down, explaining that theyre heros and here to help.

Billy takes a moment to take that in... then bolts.

It takes a bit to catch the kid, he's surprisingly agile for his concerningly small size, but they manage to get him into the jet and hes pouting in the corner looking angrier than the league has ever seen him.

They try to ask questions. Are you okay? Are you hurt? Why are you so thin? Is there anyone we should call? But Billy stays silent and his glares stay intense until he finally speaks.

"I don't talk to pigs." he spits out, giving them the nastiest look as if his glare alone could poison and kill them.

They stare at him for a moment, processing that.

"We're not cops???" Clark says, unconvincingly. Hes never been more confused in his life and has definitely never been confused for a cop.

"Whats wrong with being a cop?" Barry, the forensic scientist, pouts.

They knew that Marvel had a bit of a weird relationship with cops but they didn't realize he hated them, and especially not with such a passion!

The league spends the whole jet ride back to the tower trying to convince Billy that not only are they not cops, but that cops shouldn't be something to be afraid of anyway.

Billy spends the whole trip explaining ACAB to them and that yes, they are in fact cops, and here's all the things that the police system has done wrong that the league have probably also done or been complicit in..

I just want to write Billy radicalizing the Justice League and the league helping to reform the police system.

---

For "Now you see me, now you dont"

In the original comics Billy can and will transform in front of anyone at anytime and they wont realize that it was a transformation. Why?because plot armor. They will just think that the boy ran away right as Captain Marvel appeared or something, and when Billy reappears they don't question it either.

In the fic, its a magic perk that came with the whole Champion of Magic package and its a perk he uses often and irresponsibly. He takes it to the extremes by transforming in front of large crowds (no one questions it), while being recorded (The camera shorts out and stops working completely), and even in front of villains (they curse when the captains escapes yet again, completely ignoring the little boy standing in the middle of their secret base)

The last one is how he figured out that even if he is very much Not supposed to be somewhere, he wont be questioned as long as the only people who see him there also saw Marvel transform in that area. If someone who didn't witness the transformation were to see him, they would realize he wasn't meant to be there and call him out which would cause the witnesses to notice it as well. Leaving the room and then returning would also snap them out of it and he would be questioned.

Its a pretty overpowered ability for a child to have access to and when your a street kid without any video games to play who gets chased out of public parks for being too 'dirty' and can't afford any toys, you have to get creative with your entertainment.

Billy wants to see just how far he can take this power, and decides to transform in front of as many people in one day as possible while on the most highly secure facility in earths orbit- the Watchtower.

Follow Billy as he stretches his powers to their limits by transforming in front of the Justice League while praying he doesn't get caught and see what pranks he's able to pull off in that time!

I really like both of these ideas and I definitely want to write them someday. I already have lots of ideas for ways Billy can abuse that particular power! For now I am focusing on a few other fics but these ones are somewhere in the queue.

Jason should have come back to the manor post-lazarus pit and revealed himself as Jason Todd but not told the rest of the family that he’s also Red Hood. can you imagine how fucking funny that would be.

Nightwing: honestly! my family is fucking INSANE! i swear the only good one is my little brother, he died and came back and decided to ditch the vigilante life.

Red Hood: oh shit really?

Nightwing: honestly probably the smartest one out of all of us, he’s reading in bed while we’re all out here on stakeouts!

Red Hood: interesting. tell me more about how this brother is the best of all of you.

~

Red Hood: so what are you guys getting the smart handsome not-vigilante brother for Christmas?

Nightwing, Red Robin, and Robin:

~

Batman: now i need all of you to have an equal share in the clean up-

Red Hood: yeah sorry, you aren’t MY dad, so i’m gonna dip. have fun cleaning!

the funniest part is when Dick and Tim decide that since Red Hood and Jason are so similar and Red Hood CLEARLY seems to like what he hears about Jason, that they should try to set the two up.

Jason, calling Roy at 4am: i need you in Gotham within the next hour so you can dress up as Red Hood and we can pretend that I’m sleeping with myself.

Roy:

Roy: i’m gonna get caught sneaking out of your bedroom with lipstick on your helmet

Jason: this is gonna be the funniest thing we’ve ever done.

time travel fanfic idea where Jason comes back to before he was adopted, him and Batman still meet and he still ends up being adopted by Bruce Wayne, but he just refuses to acknowledge Batman and Robin, he acts like a civilian boy, he has over thirteen extracurriculars that Bruce does his best to keep up with. He regularly works out and trains all the fighting he's learned over the years, he goes on a gap year before college to recuperate the all blades and pretends to be the civilian in a family of crime fighting vigilantes.

He's doing pre-med and keeps nagging his siblings to go to college too (Cass, Tim), Duke is the one who spends more time with him bc everyone else is nocturnal and sleep through the day, but Jason likes to drive Duke to his classes and pick him up so they can have lunch together, Damian had a hard time at first, because Jason speaks every language that he speaks and all bat related things have to stay at the cave, his league training didn't prepare him for a civilian brother.

During an attempted kidnapping during one of the Wayne galas, Jason's whole plan almost gets blow up because one of the guys has taken a woman hostage and his Red Hood fried brain just pounced on the dude with all his might, wrestled him for the gun and kept him stuck under his boot with the gun pointed between the guys brows.

He had to pretend to be scared when Batman came to the rescue and act like he didn't know how to handle a gun.

+ Alfred 100% thinks Jason was on a children gang and that's why he's so good with knives, guns and rifles, but who's he to say anything about people's past