Latest Posts by iwanttohugsigma - Page 8
Nero: you know, I just realized something, you’re the reason I have a drinking problem.
Vergil: of course I am. I’m your father.
Griffon to V: trust me, I haven’t lead you astray in ten minutes
Y/n: I’ve never killed before
Griffon: *clears throat*
Y/n: that hasn’t tried to kill me, or bother me....or tried to marry me.
Griffin to V: hey I’m still naked. I’m always naked and you didn’t notice. Now you can never unsee it.
Vergil: y/n! Y/n! Grab my hand! As your future husband I command it!
Dante: Uh oh you shouldn’t have said it! *looks at Y/n* Here’s a hammer!
Fallen: demons bring nothing but suffering and trouble.
Dante: Nah I also brought booze.
Nero: Dante I’m afraid!
Dante: just stay close to your father!
Nero: that’s why I’m afraid!
Vergil : Aren’t you sugar and spice and everything nice.
Y/n : Well, aren’t you rudeness and sarcasm and everything… uh…
Vergil : No, go on. You find something that rhymes with sarcasm and makes sense, and I’ll take the fall tonight.
Vergil: *saving Y/n from a demon* there I saved your life now I can go back to ruining it.
Over religious guy: I shall drive you out with these sacred tools.
Nero: you’re a sacred tool.
Vergil: *Slams the door to Devil May Cry open* Dante. The mother of my child is trying to kill me.
Dante: *Not looking up from his magazine* Which one?
Vergil: I know how to pick them....
Nero: *Watching Dante hand over the money he earned to Lady*
Nero: *leans over to Trish* So is Lady like his pimp or something?
Dante: *watching the news* Vergil was at the park today.
Nero: why do you say that?
Dante: the playground is on fire
Nero: what makes you think he was there?
Dante: I haven’t seen Verge all day and when bad things happen it’s usually him.
*Vergil walks in*
Nero: Hey, where were you?
Vergil: *walks by them* the park
Nero:
Dante: TOLD YA
Nero: are you going to apologize for ripping arm off?
Vergil: No but I will apologize for the condom breaking.
Little Y/n: feeling cute my delete later.
Nero: Can I have my phone back?
Dante: I want copies!
Nero: Dante dealt with my father who ripped my arm off.
Lucia: he dealt with my creator which I guess you can call a dad who made clones and threw me away to be a god
Trish: he dealt with Mundus who was like my dad I guess
Lady: he dealt with my father who killed my mother and tried to sacrifice me to gain power.
Nico: he dealt with my dad who abandoned my mom and I to become an angel
Nero: So does he hunt demons or deal with bad fathers?
Dante: *walks by* just call me the daddy issues man
Nero: I’m trying to find a good song for Vergil’s ringtone when he calls me so I can know it’s him.
Dante: *mutteres* “Fuck you” comes to mind
Dante: Okay Verge. Let’s play a game. Take a sip every time you see something stupid.
Vergil: *looks at his brother and takes a sip*
Dante: I hope you get fucking plastered and get robbed again.
Vergil talking about Y/n: I’ve never felt this way about anyone. I want to do something for them, but what?
Dante: Well, there’s the usual things. Flowers, chocolates, promises you don’t intend to keep...
He may be your father but he ain’t your demon daddy!
Dante to Nero
Dante: Verge you kinda remind me of Darth Vader from Star Wars. You know why?
Vergil: Because I am seen as the most feared man in both the demon and human world?
Dante: No. because you’re a deadbeat dad that ripped his son’s arm off you inconsiderate asshole.
Nero: FUCK YOU
I want these motherfucking demons out of my motherfucking city
Probably Dante
Kyrie: Ok there is a party and there are nine kids and only six chairs, what do you do?
Nero: Get three chairs
Dante: have them all sit on the floor
Vergil: Have them fight to the death for the right to sit on a chair....
Nero: NO!
Dante: Oh vergil! I’m both respecting your privacy by knocking but asserting my authority as your brother by coming in anyways! *breaks the door down riding Cavaliere*
Vergil: It was unlockced you fool!
Dante: Vergil! We have a problem!
Vergil: I know, I’m looking at it.
Cloud: oh no he’s hot!
O N E W I N G E D A N G E L
There is a spikey thing on his boot!
Awkward Ardyn
Take my blood
If Ravus Was a Party Member... (Banter)
Ignis: “We must restock on our supply of curatives.” Ravus: “Curatives would not be a necessity of someone would cease falling in combat.” Prompto: “Hey! It’s not my fault the monsters keep chasing me!” Ravus: “Because they must be after that irresistible charm of yours.” Prompto: “And what if they are?!”
——
Noctis: “Man, it’s hot… I don’t know how you aren’t cooking alive in your coat, Ravus.” Ravus: “My burning hatred for people allows me to become resistant to the heat.” Noctis: “Uh…” Ravus: “…That was supposed to be a joke.”
——
Gladiolus: “Pretty useful with that blade there, Ravus.” Ravus: “More useful than you, I fear.” ——
Prompto: “Wow, the lighting here would make for a perfect photo! Let’s get a shot of all of us here!” Noctis: “Sure. I’m game.” Ravus: *disgusted noise* “I would much rather not.” Prompto: “Come on, Ray. Lighten up and smile a bit more, buddy!” Noctis: “That’d be a scary sight.” Ravus: “Then I shall make it my point to smile more. Just for you.”
——
Ravus: “Raining once more? Such awful weather…” Gladiolus: “What? Afraid of a little water?” Ravus: “Water plus dirt results in mud, Amicitia. Removing stains from my attire is far from something I wish to do.” Ignis: “Just as I refuse to do as well.” Prompto: “Shoulda made black your color, buddy.”
——
Ravus: “Amicitia! You are the King’s Shield! Act like it!” Gladiolus: “Kinda hard when there’s a bean-pole in my way!”
——
Ravus: “A decent fight, Caelum. Well done.” Noctis: “Was that a compliment…?” Ignis: “I do believe that was.” Prompto: “Look at that! Making progress!” Ravus: “…On second thought, I take back what I said.” Noctis: “No take-backs. I’ll take what I can get from you.”