Latest Posts by jeno-has-jaem - Page 5

hii congrats on ur 3k milestone!! :3

this is my first time requesting so i’m super excited here’s my order hehe

shunshine sprat + five pickled treasures + sakura mochi and pops teas + dango milk anddd mustard!

thanks so much :D

right where you left me. — albedo x gn!reader

‿୨♡୧‿︵ BON APETIT MY FELLOW CUSTOMER ! ︵‿୨♡୧‿

name of order. RIGHT WHERE YOU LEFT ME.

date. albedo ( w/ gn!hanahaki-disease!reader)

receipt. sunshine sprat (albedo kreideprinz) + five pickled treasures (hanahaki disease) + sakura mochi and pop’s teas (angst with comfort) + dango milk (normal) + mustard (drabbles) with extras of reader having the hanahaki disease

spices. angst/comfort, hanahaki disease, mentions of blood, mentions of fainting, ooc (?), mentions of death

ingredients. in which you suffer a rare disease and have to choice between your love or your life.

vip list. @scaraslover @saving-for-xiao @dawgimsohot @kazu-topia @chiruru @aqualesha @renamichii @hoshikistarlight @shenhesl0ver @serami00 @serenareiss @hiqhkey @emperatris-rinaka @bystander36 @irisxiel @coleluuviida @034ven @dear-dairiess @luv3rxcha @hadesaedes @chiro-chiro-kun @hersscherofyatta @mariusvonhangme @yuzuricebun @nejibot @hoshikistarlette @solaaresque

chef’s note. hope you like this, comrade !! im honored to be the first blog u requested to <333

3k milestone masterlist | main masterlist

you always liked flowers.

there was always something about them that pleased your eyes. maybe it’s the colors that make each flower stand out from the rest on display whenever you walk past floral whisper, the way it makes mondstadt beautiful during festivals where people use them as decorations, or how they remind you of someone.

they remind you of albedo.

he’s pretty, just like them. he stands out, just like them. he grows, just like them. he’s admired, just like them. instead of its aesthetic that you admired from flowers, it’s the fact that they all reminded you of the chief alchemist that won your heart, just like how they too won your heart.

you were grateful that there are a lot of commissions from the adventurers’ guild that can take you to dragonspine, the place where the alchemist often goes to for his personal laboratory. you honestly could care less about the fact that the region is also one of the most dangerous ones known around mondstadt, but you didn’t care. besides, you have your pyro vision with you to help you warm yourself up from the freezing temperatures.

on occasions when you’re doing the commissions in the mountain, you often mine starsilvers and pick resources that you think would be helpful to both albedo’s paintings and experiments, using that as an excuse to stop by and chat with him.

he’s quite a charmer, you thought. though, not in a way like the cavalry captain that could make most ladies around the city swoon from it, but in a way that made you all the more fall in love with albedo more.

even if he’s just talking about the ways of life, paintings, or even his experiments, when you asked him to indulge himself with that soft-spoken voice of his, it charmed you completely.

he’s undeniably nice as well if need be. whenever you come by, he’ll immediately offer you a chair nearby and let you sit by the fire, knowing that you’ll be staying with him for a while to keep yourself comfortable from the cold. he also sometimes cooks up food for you if the both of you stayed longer than intended in the laboratory, and you could instantly hear wedding bells as soon as you first tasted his foods. how could a man be so perfect?!

you didn’t mind if his feelings for you were unrequited, your crush was just a small one anyway so it wasn’t a big deal.

until it became one.

it was one morning when you found yourself instantly waking up from something that’s rising towards your throat before you rushed towards the bathroom and tried to puke it out, only for you to be horrified at the sight of blood-covered cecilias on the sink.

it can’t be, you thought to yourself, covering your mouth in disbelief. how is this possible? how did i get the disease – wasn’t this just a small crush?!

it wasn’t, unfortunately.

as gods and visions exist in this world, so does the rare disease called the hanahaki disease: the disease of unrequited love. it’s not a common case to get it, but it’s one of the most severe ones that can be easily gotten for someone who falls in love with someone so badly. it doesn’t happen unless the love that the victim has is that strong and if the victim is unsure if the person receiving such affection returns the feeling.

due to this, this led to many people trying not to think about being in an unrequited love in fear of getting the disease.

you feel like a fool for assuming that the disease won’t get to you.

after the discovery of your hanahaki disease, you decided to go for easy commissions from the guild to collect your thoughts.

you cringed to yourself when you felt the flowers inside of your body whenever you inhaled, the petals and leaves brushing your ribs and lungs. you couldn’t help but shudder when you thought of the possibility of getting those prickly flowers instead of cecilias.

more importantly, was your crush on the alchemist not as small as you thought?

you genuinely thought it was. though, you can’t blame yourself for it since you never had a long-lasting crush on anyone with intentions of confessing since you never had such affections for anyone else until now.

that’s why you can’t bring yourself to try and go to the cathedral to get rid of the cecilias that began to sprout in your body.

you’ve heard of the consequences if one were to choose the removal of the cecilias. you either die from the flowers, or get it treated with the price of losing your feelings forever. how cruel could this world be for such a tragic fate?

you can’t afford to lose your feelings that just made you the person that you are. wouldn’t this mean that you’ll never get to experience the happiness you feel from flowers and from albedo? how could you fall in love with someone else after this?

that’s why you have decided to confess to someone about your condition.

“...oh.” is the only thing that came out of kaeya’s mouth after you told him about the hanahaki disease.

you let out a sigh, leaning back to your seat as the both of you wait for your meals in good hunter. “yeah… i didn’t know who to talk about this with since i’m sure they’ll just be too worried about my health to not answer my question, so i want your honest opinion about my situation.” you explained.

“so, what should i do if i don’t want to lose the only thing that makes me feel human?” you asked.

the cavalry captain stays silent for a moment to think deeply, his face unreadable.

“i’m not one to fall in love so easily,” he spoke casually, placing an arm around his chair. “though if i were to be in your shoes, i’d confess to the person first to see if there’s hope for me to let my feelings stay.”

“..and if the person doesn’t reciprocate your feelings…?”

“then i’ll have the surgery,” he answered. “there’s nothing else left to do than to either die or lose, and i’d rather lose than to lose my own life from something like this.”

you nodded slowly in understanding, though his answer doesn’t satisfy you.

before you could let the words come out from your mouth, you suddenly felt a cecilia rising up your throat once more, causing you to immediately cover your mouth with wide eyes.

kaeya seems to be taken back from your reaction. “are you alright?”

you didn’t manage to reply, feeling yourself dropping to the concrete floor from your seat as you cough out more cecilias, not caring about the sounds of people around you gasping at such a gorey sight.

you suddenly felt a cold hand on your back as well as a large shadow looming in front of you, and you realized it was kaeya who was covering you from people who were watching, causing you to continue coughing out more bloodied flowers to the ground.

unnoticed by you, however, a certain man was watching the scene from afar with his mouth open agape.

as days flew by, your condition and worries started to grow.

the current gossip around mondstadt is how the hanahaki disease has now been reported after not hearing the case for more than twenty years. if it weren’t for the cavalry captain talking to every single person who had witnessed your embarrassing outbreak, your identity would’ve been leaked as the poor victim who’s in an unrequited love.

just like the first day of your disease, you continued to do easy commissions that didn't require you to do much physical combat, and you couldn’t find yourself to visit dragonspine for albedo. what if he sees the flowers and finds out that you like him? wouldn’t he just lie about how he liked you back out of pity?

of course not, you knew albedo too well to not do that. he’d probably try to find something that could help you tolerate the disease if he were to find out about it. but you’re honestly too scared to test it and confess, not when you could risk both your feelings and your friendship with the alchemist.

how could you live without being able to feel and without someone such as albedo to make you feel happy?

it didn’t help that kaeya’s answer started to haunt you when you lay down on your bed at night to slumber, your stomach sinking whenever you thought about it.

there’s nothing to lose when you’re about to lose everything, but it’s scary to take the leap.

when a week had long passed, you started puking out flowers more frequently than ever, tears started to form in your eyes from the pain of cecilias coming out from your mouth one by one until you could breathe properly again. it was starting to become more brutal and you hated it.

it led you to no longer be able to do commissions peacefully without puking out flowers. you couldn’t hold the petals in like back then, and you could not afford to let people see your crisis again, not when those pity and horrified gazes made your stomach feel sick.

you still haven’t visited dragonspine either.

you assumed albedo must’ve been relieved that you’re no longer visiting his laboratory to bother him, because now that you have nothing else to do much, you realized how a nuisance you must’ve been to the busy alchemist.

it hurts your heart to think about him.

“stop thinking about him,” you mumbled to yourself, placing your hands on your heart as you stared at the ceiling with an empty expression. “you’ll only continue to hurt yourself in the end.”

even when you tried your best to not think about him, you couldn’t escape even in your own dreams, a reality where you’re with albedo and not suffering from the disease that you despise. deep down, you dearly missed visiting the cold region and its quiet atmosphere. you missed the feeling of a welcoming cottage that’s in the middle of nowhere when you arrived at his laboratory, the sight of the light from the fire nearby that illuminates albedo so beautifully that made you smile, the random topics you could think of for you to talk about, you missed it all.

“you should tell him,” kaeya told you one day when he visited your home, the usual smirk plastered on his face was no longer there. “you’re getting sicker and sicker everyday, you have to do i–”

“i can’t.” you spoke, your voice cracked as you looked down at the ground in shame. “i… i can’t bring myself to tell him. he must’ve been happy i’m no longer bothering hi–”

“he recently came up to me yesterday,” he interrupted. “he was looking for you.”

your breath hitches, looking at the cavalry captain in surprise. “why? does he need me to look for some–”

“he said you haven’t seen him for weeks. he wanted to see you to check up on you.” you immediately noticed how the blue-haired man brought out a wrapped item from his pocket, gesturing you to take it. “you should open it. it’s a gift from him.”

your heart beats in anticipation, and you hesitantly took the gift away from his cold hands.

kaeya then faces sideways. “i’ll leave you alone to open it, but i suggest you to meet him and tell him the truth before it’s too late,”

“because for as long as i know that man, i had never seen him being so worried until that day.”

the gift is a brooch. a handmade one.

made with perhaps the finest ores of mondstadt, albedo managed to create a beautiful brooch that matches you a lot. you honestly felt teary-eyed when you first saw such a magnificent jewel displayed.

it was the final push that made you finally decide to talk to albedo.

it seemed as though celestia’s on your side, because when you went past good hunter on your way to dragonspine, you came across to albedo, who was chatting with timaeus by the alchemy stand nearby.

“y/n?” he called out, the words he was supposed to tell to the man across from the alchemist died in his throat when he saw you.

you try to smile. “can we talk privately?”

albedo nodded without hesitation. “of course, i apologize for the sudden excuse, timaeus.”

the brown-haired man smiled reassuringly, giving you both a thumbs-up. “it’s no problem for me, i’ll be waiting for you.”

the chief alchemist nods in gratitude before he gestured to you to take the lead.

hence how you find yourself sitting by good hunter once more across albedo, who’s been staring at you ever since the both of you sat down.

“...listen,” you spoke up softly. “i.. i’m sorry that i didn’t visit you for weeks. i’m going through something that i want to talk to you about.”

“it’s alright,” he replied with a gentle look on his face. “i’m just glad i get to see you again. you can tell me anything.”

you hesitated for a moment, staring down at your lap. there’s nothing to lose, you reminded yourself.

“...i love you, albedo.” you said, looking back at the blonde-haired man with a serious look on your face. “i realized it way too soon, and.. i-i understand if you don’t return the same feelings, i just want to continue this friendship if you allow it.”

you could hear your heartbeat beating so loudly, you thought albedo could hear it too. you just hope those stupid cecilias in your body won’t ruin the time right no–

“i’m sorry, y/n,” he said after moments of silence.

your breath hitches, feeling your heart dropped.

you knew it.

“i’m sorry but i– Y/N!” albedo immediately stood up from his seat as you felt light-headed, your vision fading to black as you found yourself slowly leaning to the side. ah, you must’ve been at your limit now.

i’m sorry albedo, you thought to yourself as your body hit the ground with a loud thud, feeling the flowers starting to creep up to your mouth once more. i’m sorry you had to see me like this.

i’m sorry i wasn’t brave enough to do this sooner and sacrifice my feelings.

you slowly regained consciousness after feeling like you’ve been in the sea for so long.

the first thing you saw was the light, then it was the white ceiling, to be followed by the light coming through the stained glass windows of what appears to be the cathedral.

how are you still alive–

“y/n?” you flinched when you heard the familiar voice of the man that you last saw before everything went black, causing you to look at the doorway and see the disbelief chief alchemist standing there.

“..albedo?” you called, wincing when your voice was hoarse. “what happened?”

“why didn’t you tell me you had the hanahaki disease?” he asked, walking towards you. “you should’ve told me sooner–”

“i didn’t want you to pity me like everyone else.” you said, your hands slowly rose to your throat when you realized you could no longer feel the flowers inside your chest. “did you–”

before you knew it, you felt his arms wrapped around your upper body, causing you to gasp in surprise.

“you shouldn’t have scared me like that.” he spoke in a tone you couldn’t recognize. “you had no idea how… how worried i was when you fell down before i could even finished what i said – i thought i was going to lose you when i didn’t had the chance to say i love you back.”

your eyes instantly widen from his words.

“...you…” you stumbled on your words, trying to process what he had just said. “you love me back?”

he nods without a question. “of course i do.. i didn’t realize it sooner until i found myself missing your presence when you didn’t come by for a week.”

you shut your eyes closed. “i thought i was bothering you…”

“never,” he said as sincere as he can. “you could never bother me. not when i always looked forward to your visits. i even learned many recipes just so i can cook any food you want.”

your heartbeats grew loud as you feel your cheeks warming, and you slowly wrap your arms around him as well with a relieved sigh. “...i’m sorry i scared you like that.”

you feel him hugging you tighter, but not enough to make you feel like you’re suffocating. “just don’t do that again.. i don’t want to lose you.”

and at that moment, you felt like you can finally breathe now.

Genshin Volleyball Dream Team [Volleyball Team AU - Inspired by Haikyuu!] Introduction Headcanons

Notes: Guess who started watching Haikyuu! FML As if I didn’t have enough things to do I decided to fall in love with like 5 different volleyball teams with an average of 10 players. 

I couldn’t get it out of my head. I’m sorry.

Scenario: What if the Genshin boys were a volleyball team?

In the next part: How would it be working as their manager? What if someone hits on you? What if some girl fans bully you? Also, how would it be to date a Genshin volleyball superstar?

Other works in the Volleyball Team AU Series: Click Here

If you’re not familiar with volleyball (or Haikyuu) here’s a link explaining what each position in the team does.

Keep reading

catastrophe ( kaedehara k. )

synopsis. you were a college freshman who just moved into your dormitory. as it happens, you accidentally caught sight of your not-so-slick neighbor from the room across yours snuck in a cat. being the good person that you are, you didn't confront him nor did you snitch on him. well, that was until you got the chance to use that information against him. not so good anymore, are we?

pairing. kazuha x f!reader

genre. fluff. slight angst. college!smau.

status. in progress.

note. i've always wanted to make a genshin smau, but i just didn't have any inspiration (nor motivation) to do so. but as i lay on my bed trying to sleep, somehow, a light bulb pops above my head. i slept at 2 AM that night. so, if you guys enjoy this, hit that reblog button!

taglist. [open, send me an ask]

STRAIGHT As — INAZUMAN + BEIDOU

01. TO BE DETERMINED...

lights, camera, action!

premise. in which you get yourself involved in a lot of unscripted drama. (genshin celebrity au.)

includes. xiao, childe, albedo, ayato, scaramouche, thoma & kazuha.

next episode. unavailable.

note. i surprised myself with how much plot this actually has.

零 ; you, the typecasted “passerby a”

the path to stardom is an arduous journey, but you've already abandoned your dreams not even halfway down the road.

you are far from the fresh newbie you once were. maybe you hoped to be famous at some point, your name sung in ardent praises and joint with stellar performances, but you've never received major roles that strayed from “classmate b” or “the protagonist's best friend” who only ever appears to give advice.

the closest you've been to getting a main character role is being part of the second pairing of a cheesy romance drama that never became a hit, a series with a generic plot and a bland cast of no name actors.

but you can't deny the spark of hope lighting your heart when you receive word of an audition for an upcoming drama adaptation of a well-loved webtoon series, a series you are an avid fan of. it's a murder mystery following a genius detective striving to solve a serial killings cold case, with snippets of romance and the occasional comedy, grim as the premise may be.

once the drama adaptation was confirmed, it quickly became a hot topic; fans are anticipating the casting and filming crew, expecting nothing less of perfection to honor the brilliant source material. by all accounts, it's big news, and snagging even a minor role would definitely earn you more recognition.

if you're chosen to act as the victim in the first murder, you would already be beyond satisfied—being part of such a masterpiece is enough to make you overjoyed. you don't have too high hopes but there's no harm in trying for the audition, right?

yes. no harm at all.

that's if you don't count the brain damage you suffered when your head slammed against the wall from complete shock as you received an e-mail from the staff confirming your admittance to the project.

as the protagonist's love interest, no less—a journalist investigating the serial murders to enact revenge on their younger brother's stead, the third victim in the killings.

一 ; xiao, the celebrity crush

acting practice is generally considered a casual affair in every project you've taken on, yet you couldn't help but spend hours trying to make yourself look presentable (and avoid looking like a beggar compared to your shining idols when you stand side by side). you may be a tad bit overdressed, but you'd hate to make a fool out of yourself on day one.

except that is exactly what you do. because you're a walking disaster.

in your defense, it's not even your fault! the moment you step foot in the venue, you're ushered by the staff to a row of waiting rooms... without any nameplates attached by the doors and no indication of where you're supposed to go. left with no other choice, you mentally count eeny meeny miny moe and surge forward for the chosen room.

you can't tell if you're tremendously lucky or the most unfortunate person on earth, but you come face to face with a person you never thought you'd see in the flesh.

the thing is, the staff never informed you of your future colleagues. the casting is a well-kept secret, even from the actors themselves, to prevent information leaks to the media before the official announcement.

you really wish you had time to prepare yourself before you had to meet xiao, though.

he's lounging by the sofa, curls of dark hair sprawled on the cushions. his face is obscured by an eye mask, fashioned in a cute design you wouldn't expect him to take an interest in at all. if you took a picture of him right now and printed them as merchandise, you're sure they'll sell like hotcakes, but a selfish part of you wants to keep this sight to yourself.

yes, because... because you've been crushing on him since forever!

you've seen his growth as an actor as far back as five years ago, when he only just started his career! he made the perfect mysterious pretty boy male lead, and the romance film he starred in was such a good classic! but he didn't get typecasted, no no. he went beyond his pretty boy persona to work in other productions, where he acted as the crazed antagonist in a horror movie. that, too, eventually became a classic film for any horror movie fan. his murderous glare is just too damn scary!

he's excellent in action-packed movies as well, there's never a need for stunt doubles with him. you've seen his behind the scene clips, and they're just awesome. he doesn't speak much in interviews, his replies clipped and hardly substantial, but you try to catch each piece of precious footage.

oh fuck i shouldn't be here. you snap back to your senses and reach for the doorknob, but the creaking sound of the door prompts xiao to twitch.

a pale hand drags down the eye mask to his chin, and his dazed golden eyes pin you in place.

“...who are you?”

it's a simple question, but it's like you're trying to prove your innocence to court. you begin to ramble, introducing yourself in a series of stutters, and explaining how you got to his room. you insist you aren't there to peep on him and it was a complete accident.

“...so you entered my room by mistake,” xiao summarizes your ten paragraphs-worth of explanation into a single concise sentence. he doesn't look angry, but doesn't look pleased by your presence either. “it's fine. i could guess the staff was too busy to show you your room.” he sits up properly, fixing his hair messy from his nap. “you're the journalist, right? i look forward to working with you.”

rather than a job, filming feels more like a reward. you get to see xiao everyday, get to talk to xiao even if it's just you commenting on the weather, get to eat with him in lunch breaks (you're seven seats away from him but that counts, right?) and get to act alongside him-

and xiao is the second male lead. you get to act romantic scenes with him. you get to act lovey-dovey with xiao in a police uniform because he's a policeman in this show.

each brush of your hands together sends your heart racing in a speed too fast to be healthy, but as an actor, you're expected to keep your composure and deliver your lines properly.

(the makeup artist is always wondering why you look so red on screen when she swears she didn't put much blush on you, though.)

“don't you need to ask something of me?”

you blink innocently as you peel off the heavy costume, the last scene for the day finally wrapped up. xiao must be feeling hot too because he's also wearing a huge coat in the middle of summer—his face is beet red.

“ask you for something...?” your cheeks burn bright. “oh no, was i too obvious?”

xiao awkwardly looks away. “you could say that.”

how mortifying! you fan your face, hoping your makeup isn't too melted. you already feel like an idiot, no need to look like one.

but xiao already thinks you're stupid. no turning back now.

“o... okay... since the cat is out of the bag, then...” you pull out a pen and a piece of paper, holding it out to him. “please give me your autograph!”

“...what.”

“i've been your fan for the last five years! i don't know who ratted me out, actually i'm about 87% sure it's childe, but since you know-”

“wait- what? five years?”

“.........if that's not what you're talking about, then what is?”

“no, i thought you wanted me to ask me ou-”

he seals his lips at the most crucial moment, horrified at himself. “sorry. i'll ask you another time.”

... and then he walks away. just like that.

“xiao, what about my autograph?!”

“forget it!”

“why all of a sudden?!”

二 ; childe, the scandal magnet

notorious for the massive number of scandals under his belt, it's a surprise to find ajax (with a stage name of childe) in the set of this major production. you're advised by your manager to steer clear of him and avoid unnecessary contact to prevent sullying your reputation, but you can't deny his acting prowess—he shines on the stage, a performance you can't tear your eyes away from.

he's incredibly versatile, capable of taking on any role and absorbing the character to make it come to life, almost as if he is its incarnation.

it starts as a simple game before actual practice, each actor asked to draw lots from pieces of paper scribbled with different roles, and given an accompanying script to base off of.

everyone laughs when childe, ironically enough, draws the “womanizer who cheats on his lover.”

unfortunately, you couldn't laugh along with them because you picked the “lover” role. your incredible (read: atrocious) luck astounds you.

it goes just about as well as everyone expects it. childe, seemingly in his element, plays the part of a perfect scumbag. it's easy to hate him like this, all flamboyant gestures and empty promises of “you are my one and only.” his performance inspires you to try harder, and so you raise your voice, your passionate screams of indignance almost sounding heart-felt, like you truly are experiencing a severe betrayal.

when childe sweeps you into his arms, whispering platitudes dripping with honey, you're nearly fooled into forgiving him.

it's hard to get yourself out of the role when the director ends the scene, satisfied with the act. childe's expression returns to its usual lazy grin, a far cry from the smug smirk prior, and he pats your head to wake you up. “nice work. i really felt like i was getting scolded by an angry girlfriend.”

dazzled by his brilliance, you barely have enough coherence to return the compliment.

your awe doubles when he performs his next act.

much to xiao's horror, he picks the “dying younger brother” role, a direct accompaniment to childe's “grieving older brother.” they make an... interesting pair, but they're also professionals, and the scene they perform almost makes you weep real tears.

xiao lays limp on the floor like a lifeless doll, and childe cradles him to his chest, delivering his lines with sobs and cries that sound too real to be an act. his heart-wrenching wails bounce from the walls, going straight to strike your heart. his voice cuts through the air, demanding your attention, as if telling you to keep your eyes on him and to never look away.

it's nothing like the sleazebag character he was playing twenty minutes ago, and you have to remind yourself your scripts are only given once you've drawn lots; he had a maximum of five minutes to read through it, process the information, decide how to deliver his lines, and visualize himself performing it in the best way possible.

like this, he doesn't look at all like the scandalous man everyone makes him out to be. he's just an earnest man who's good at pretending to be someone else.

it's terrifying to think about. did he ever act like his true self when the cameras stopped rolling, then? was he just playing the part of a “good co-worker” when he was talking to you earlier? was the whole “scandalous womanizer” image something he set up for himself? a reputation he deliberately made to attract the media's attention? it isn't unusual for actors to cause drama as a publicity stunt, after all.

no, that doesn't make sense. no matter how desperate, nobody would like bad rumors circulating about them. as much as your name is spread around, it also goes hand in hand with distasteful gossip. childe is plenty famous, even before the scandals began popping up, so he never really needed them and they would only further ruin his image...

...on the contrary, if there's anyone getting famous from those scandals, it's...

...the girls he supposedly hooked up with?

rather than making those scandals for fame, doesn't it make more sense if those girls fabricated stories and took advantage of his reputation?

it's no secret that meddlesome paparazzi and hardcore fans obsessively pry into celebrities' personal lives. if they sniff a hint of dating scandals, they don't stop digging. furthermore, once the media releases information to the public, people will take it as fact. in actuality, it doesn't matter what's true or not; what the public wants to believe becomes the “truth.”

if the people deemed it plausible, if they thought “childe would definitely do something like this, so of course if the girl says they hooked up in the dressing room, they did”...

...even if childe denied those claims, nobody would believe him. not even you. you didn't think about it until now. in fact, at the very beginning, you already had assumptions about him, devouring the media's lies.

childe laughs when you apologize to him. it was certainly a shock when you suddenly knocked on his door, then the instance he opened it, you began to bow deeply, nearly slamming your forehead to his chest.

“i'm used to it, don't worry.” he smiles, but it doesn't reach his eyes. “you were so stiff around me, it was pretty obvious what you thought of me. but you didn't have to apologize.”

“no, i do! i was being disrespectful!” you insist, taking him by surprise when you grab the lapels of his jacket. “you're nothing like what they say! i'm sure you've been through a lot just because everyone keeps saying whatever they want, without thinking of your feelings... and everyone laughed that one time we played the acting game... i... i can't take back the time i've spent being suspicious of you, but i want to change that!” you stare directly at his widened eyes, determined. “i want to know you better, ajax!”

the use of his real name stuns him and for a moment, all he can do is gape at you.

then he narrows his eyes, his lips shaping to a firm line, and he tugs you inside the room.

a yelp unwittingly escapes your mouth when you're pressed against the door, his arms caging either side of you. his expression is unfamiliar now, unlike anything you've ever seen before; uncharacteristically stern, harsher around the edges, spiteful gaze boring holes into your skull.

“you want to know me better... some pretty words you just said. what do you actually want?”

your breath hitches when his hand caresses your cheek, but the striking glare he's giving you makes you think he wants to sink his nails deep into your skin instead.

“this isn't the first time someone tried to approach me, you know. what, you want to be friends with me? you're going to ask if i can invite you to my house? then you're going to tell people how i took advantage of you while you were sleeping?”

“what- no! of course not!” you yell, face heating up just by the thought of it. “nevermind lying to the media, i don't have the guts to sleep over a guy's house i barely even know!”

his expression falls to a deadpan. “oh. my bad. you're quite pure, aren't you. of course you wouldn't.”

“that's what makes you believe me?!”

the arms caging you falls to his sides as he walks away, leaving you dumfounded. “right, right, sorry for scaring you. can't you let me off easy? it's pretty hard to trust someone when you're in my position. if i treat you to dinner, will you forgive me?”

“i... i came here with good intentions... now i feel as though i was harassed...”

his usual smile falls on his face, like he's a completely different person from the man who trapped you just seconds prior. “what do you think about seafood? i'll let you eat as many crabs as you like. i really am sorry, promise. if you were saying the truth earlier, then i'd be glad to know you better too, [name].”

you give him a look. “...if they saw us entering a restaurant together, wouldn't that attract rumors?”

“hm? is everyone so narrow-minded they think anyone who eats together is in an illicit relationship?”

the answer is no, so you eat as much crabs and shrimp as you want to your heart's content. you're getting your food's worth for that fright he caused earlier. childe isn't complaining anyway, only impressed with how much dishes you're practically inhaling.

in any case, it isn't a date. there is no ambience or heart-pounding romance of any sort. not when you're overtly taking advantage of his money and childe's taking ugly pictures of you mid-bite.

but then, of course, the media takes note of it; the topic of your outing is brought up at an interview, to which you fret and panic because you were never popular enough to be interviewed before, and they're asking if you're fucking childe, of all things-

“what are you talking about?” childe pops up behind you, unhelpfully wrapping an arm around your shoulders as if he wants to add fuel to the fire. he chuckles, tilting your chin to lean closer to his face. “i'm just pursuing [name]. nothing's happened yet. unless [name] wants to...”

you take it back. he's definitely at fault for having this many scandals.

三 ; albedo, the male lead

the first day of rehearsals, the protagonist of the drama isn't even there.

to your astonishment, nobody complains about it. twenty minutes into practice (most scenes skipped due to the protagonist's absence), the director gets a call and excuses himself outside. less than a minute after, he informs everyone the star of the show won't be able to make it.

the actors trade unsure looks, wondering what the hell is going on, but the rest of the staff remain unfazed. the director notices and explains, “it's albedo. his busy schedule can't be helped. his manager called me to let me know his flight got delayed.”

and then it makes much more sense.

albedo is well-renowned in the film industry, an extraordinary talent who first came into showbiz three years ago. it's not at all a long time, but it's long enough for him to receive countless awards and bountiful movie offers—he was just born for the stage. if anything, this drama is lucky to have him in it, not the other way around. a late arrival for a rehearsal is nothing. he could probably disappear for two months without telling anybody and when he comes back, the director would beg him to act for the drama for twice the pay. (an exaggeration, but you get the point.)

and... you're expected to partner with him? you? a speck of dust compared to the sun that is albedo? you have to match his brilliance and not look like a turd beside him on screen? you have to be equals with him and- and you actually get to- you get to hold hands with him, kiss him, and- those couple stuff? everything? his fans would murder you if your mother doesn't kill you first! you know she likes his movies a lot!

the fourth day of rehearsals, he finally comes to the set. not with an air of arrogance or excessive pride. he just exudes confidence, strutting to the room in an elegant poise you can't hope to replicate. he gives his sincere apologies for the inconvenience to the staff, all polite bows and offer of recompense.

“but there's no reason to worry,” he declares, gaze steely. “i won't make any more trouble for you.”

he refuses when the director suggests taking it slowly and instead goes straight to practice. but it doesn't look like he needs any of it at all.

as if he's been here all along, he falls into place with the other actors, not a single awkward pause in their scripted conversations and everything smooth sailing. he delivers a flawless performance, like the cameras are already rolling and he's practiced for tens of thousands of times already, not read through a portion of the script in the car ride towards the set.

there is one thing he's struggling with, however.

“you're too stiff with each other,” the acting coach comments, frowning slightly at the two of you and cutting the scene short. “rather than bickering, it's like you're actually arguing, and that's not what we want to portray.”

you blink, exchanging a look with albedo, and look down at his collar you're still gripping.

maybe you do look like you're trying to strangle him instead of pulling him closer to your face for some good ol' sexual tension.

originally, the characters you play didn't get along well in the beginning of the webtoon; the genius detective didn't like to rely on others, conceited enough to believe he can solve the case on his own, hence seeing the journalist as a hindrance since they kept pestering him to let them help him, and he help them in turn so they could work together. the detective didn't deem them “useful” for the investigation, and it was only much later that he (begrudgingly) admitted the journalist can be helpful... sometimes. thus officially starting their partnership for the investigation, and later on, partners in the romantic sense.

there were quite a lot of bickering scenes before the actual romance commenced, and you're struggling with finding a delicate balance to that—where exactly do you draw the line between petty squabbles and severe disputes? how do you show the chemistry between these two characters while butting heads in every instance? the enemies to lovers trope is harder to act than it seems.

“try to get familiar,” the director suggests. “you're stiff because you don't know each other well. you're too shy to touch or get closer. why not leave early and go on a little date by yourselves to fix that?”

“is that really okay...?” you say, unsure. besides being hesitant to leave earlier than the rest, you're also nervous to be alone with your co-actor.

“if he says it's fine, then it's fine.” albedo shrugs, starting to walk towards the dressing room and tugging you along. “but if we're going outside, we should wear disguises. it's also fine if we borrow some of your clothes, right?”

“of course, of course~” the director indulges him. “have fun, kiddos.”

as it turns out, albedo is a master of disguise. he doesn't even have a wig or anything but you almost can't recognize him clad in casual attire. he also almost looks like a stylist while figuring out what outfit to give you, and you're left in awe when you look at yourself in the mirror wearing clothes you wouldn't normally pick out yourself but they look really, really good on you, and they do a good job changing your image too. not that you think anybody would recognize you anyway, unpopular and all.

“where do you want to go?” you trail after him on the way to the bus station, always a step or two behind. albedo makes a humming noise, subtly slowing his pace to match your strides.

“why not just go wherever our feet takes us?” he pipes up. “as long as it's not teeming with people, of course.”

so with zero preparation at all, you do just that. you stop by a bookstore, with you showing him around the comics section and him adamantly insisting the plain hard-cover literature he's picking up is a thrilling epic that will definitely pique your interest, [name] stop yawning-

you pay a visit to the arcade, where you find albedo is clumsy with his feet and can't play dance dance revolution to save his life, but also unnecessarily adept with claw machines because he has a little sister who loves getting stuffed toys. you compete over who gets the most points in the basketball game to decide who pays for dinner, end up in a tie, and move on to a zombie shooting game. you win by a narrow margin and albedo tells you so, but you point a finger at the results and tell him to cough up the cash. then you play around in the photo booth using the craziest filters, and you take the liberty of pasting stickers everywhere.

dinner is a simple affair. albedo looks ready to go to some michelin star establishment but you introduce him to a sushi restaurant that's relatively cheap. he's impressed by the way you swipe at the conveyor belt so quickly. okay, so you may look like an utter glutton right now, but it's fine. not the first time you embarrassed yourself in front of a co-actor.

lastly, you stop by an ice cream shop to get gelato. your appetite is “awe-inspiring,” as albedo put it, but you argue there's always room for dessert.

“will this actually help us, though...?” you sigh, eating a spoonful of gelato. “i don't understand the difference between bickering and arguing.”

“we've done it the whole day,” albedo reminds you, using a tissue to clean the residue of cream on your cheek. “we'll do just fine.”

you stare at him in disbelief. “...is this also one of your habits from taking care of your sister?”

“ah. you could say that.”

just as albedo said, filming goes a lot more smoothly. the playful air is a huge improvement compared to last time when they said you looked ready to beat him to submission. the romantic tidbits are coming along well, too, spun between action-packed scenes where you're pressed against albedo in a slim locker to hide from the murderer lurking nearby or sweet slice of life moments outside of the investigation.

at last, the confession scene is upon you. just a while back, the two main characters got into a full-blown argument; the detective was irritated by the lack of progress in the investigation, and deduced his feelings were distracting him. he decided to keep the journalist at arm's length, never allowing them to go close. of course, they didn't react well to this, and so they pester him again, but the argument became heated and it eventually peaked to “you're an inconvenience to me!” which led them to separate ways.

the journalist, desperate to solve the case on their own, approached people who seemed to be in the know. they were nearly pulled into bed by an attractive yet suspicious man, who's genuinely interested in the journalist romantically and used intel on their younger brother's murder as leverage, but they get interrupted by the detective pounding on the door.

he dragged the journalist out, thoroughly upset at the notion of selling themself, but they deny the accusations and claim they were tricked.

the argument stretched longer, the both of them airing out everything they dislike about the other, but the detective accidentally slipped and confessed his real feelings. the journalist, who never thought of him that way, was frozen on the spot.

it's a long scene requiring much preparation. aside from the amount of lines you have to memorize, there's also a hotel suite you have to borrow for the shoot, the cameras they need to set for the “dragging” scene that has a lot of movement, the really awkward half-bedroom scene you have to act with your co-actor, and the fact that you have to take the confession scene before the sun completely set.

it's truly a busy day. anxiety plagued you the moment you came out of the makeup room, knowing what comes next.

but it's a job, and one especially you couldn't afford to slack on. the kind-of-but-not-really-bedroom scene goes without a hitch, but albedo interrupts you a tad bit too early; the top of your shirt is barely unbuttoned but he's already storming in, ripping you out of the other man's grasp.

the director doesn't chide him for it however, and he drags you out of the hotel as planned. you're a bit frazzled by the suddenness of it all, clothes still rumpled, but it adds on to your acting and your stuttering questions make the scene look more natural.

albedo's fury seeing you in such a disheveled state seems almost genuine, too.

“why are you acting like this?!” you pull your wrist away in an effort to make him let go, as described in the script, but albedo refuses to. an improvisation, perhaps? but now of all times...? “you didn't care about me before! are you trying to be nice now? didn't you say you were sick of putting up with me? you hated me for being stupid, right? guess what, then! i was stupid enough to get almost taken advantage of! if you're just going to lecture me, let go. i don't want to hear any of it. i already know how much of a fool i am.”

you're supposed to back away now, but he doesn't let you do that either. for one step backward, he takes two forward, nose nearly brushing with yours in the close proximity. your face heats up in a combination of confusion and embarrassment, your ears barely registering his lines.

“...never listen to me. you always go off on your own and i still think you're a reckless idiot. you're noisy and brash and you annoy me to no end,” he says in one breath, staring deeply into your eyes. “but seeing you with someone else annoys me even more. to the point i'd abandon everything just to get you back.”

“w...” your throat is incredibly dry. “why would you...”

“whether i like it or not, you've become important to me. i love your stupid laugh and your stupid smile. i love the way you look at me, and i don't want you to look at anyone else. you drive me crazy when you put yourself in danger because i don't want to lose you. i want you so badly that i want you to only think about me, spend time only with me, only love me. i-”

you're fairly certain this is nowhere near his lines in the script.

“i love you so much that it scares me.” his voice trembles as his hand lifts to cup your face, something that finally bears semblance to the original scene. “it was wrong of me to say those horrible things. not just last time. i've been terrible to you, and no amount of apologies can make up for it. but i ask only one more chance.”

his finger hovers at the corner of your lip.

“[name], won't you only look at me?”

you gape like a fish out of water, unable to reply. you're trying to remember your lines, flipping through the mental script in your head, but the director's “cut!” pulls you back to reality.

albedo blinks, getting himself out of the role, and he lets go of you reluctantly, the heat of his fingers lingering on your skin.

“the scene was good, but you said the wrong name.” the director laughs. “it's alright. we can still shoot where we last left off. return to your positions.”

as told, you go back to your previous position. you give a furtive glance at albedo, whose cheeks flare in humiliation. he's probably never done such a rookie mistake before. there's no reason to be that flustered about it; you've made the same error plenty of times.

“i apologize. i won't do it again next time.”

(if he's going to confess, the least he can do is make his own lines for the occasion.)

next episode ; unavailable. preview →

四 ; ayato, the cannon fodder

五 ; scaramouche, the best friend

六 ; thoma, the former male lead

七 ; kazuha, ???

Little Brother ⊱⊰ Kazuha

A/N: This isn't the sequel for Vigil, but a series of scenarios that I couldn't add to the ficlet since it was getting too long- ehe

➸ Vigil (Ficlet) Honor (Sequel)

✤ she/her

≿————-　★　————-≾

The most adorable little brother ever! His cheeks are round and chubby—and they're always flushed pink!

Totally not because you keep pinching them until he cries- no, totally not, mm-mm.

His childhood days aren't complete until he says 'nee-san' at least once. The poor child is getting bullied by Tomo a lot too, so who does he come running to for help!?

"Onee-chan! Tomo- T-Tomo- waaAAAH! NEE-SANNN!"

Goodness, growing up flipped a switch in his personality but that's a talk for later

If you aren't holding his hand as you two walk around the Kaedehara Estate, he's in your arms like a literal bb

If he's not in your arms then he is sitting on your shoulders, giddily exclaiming that he is as tall as you are [even if he'll eventually grow to be taller-]

Kazuha clings to you. Nee-san must always be in his sight or else he'll either be (っ- ‸ – ς) or (ಠ╭╮ಠ)

Yeah, he's definitely more (ಠ╭╮ಠ)

"Nee-chan, stop hiding from me!"

Will lowkey get frustrated about it even if he's the one who wanted to play hide and seek lmao-

You understand why Tomo bullies him, he's cute. If your little brother hasn't found you in the course of ten minutes, he will cry for you

Even when you appear, his attempts to stop weeping 'because it makes him less of a man' will fail and he'll just look x2 cuter

Mm, everything's not sunshine and rainbows, though

The wealth of the clan has been diminishing as time passes, so naturally, its prestige follows

Since both your parents are occupied with thinking of ways to keep the clan's nobility, most —if not all— of Kazuha's attention is placed on you. His beloved nee-chan o(≧∇≦o)

You pamper him, but not to the point that he becomes spoiled. Disciplining him crumbles your heart [he looks so sad when he's reprimanded] but since it is for his betterment, you still do it. He's a quick learner, too.

Anything for his nee-san. Anything for nee-san!

One time when he sees you being scolded heavily for something that he did, he teared up, ran on his wobbly legs, and punched your father's legs asdfghjkl

"Don't hurt nee-chan!"

Ugh, why is he so adorable. You personally keep him away from other girls his age because they're already giving him the heart eyes- you know for a fact that all that baby fat is going away to be replaced by more defined features when he grows up

So oohlala, when adolescence kicks in and he's suddenly looking sharper? Heavens. The pink envelopes coming in endless. Unfortunately, however, your brother doesn't look interested. You know what caught his fancy?

Roaming. Wandering. Adventuring.

Since the clan is losing its power, no one honestly cares that he is shirking his 'responsibilities'. Sometimes, he goes away and doesn't return for days. Just your typical adolescent, but he's still your sibling. He still calls you nee-san :D

That is until both your parents have passed — until the Kaedehara name lost its status — and you were both alone.

You were eighteen then, but you proved yourself capable of being the heir by pragmatism alone. Earning money for you and your brother, taking over the chores, everything.

During this time, Kazuha had been teaching himself the ways of the blade with Tomo, who offered his help to you whenever he could.

And as you grow up — eventually, Kazuha does, as well.

"Welcome home, how was your walk?" Your sibling, now at the age when you took over the household, smiled.

"Ah, I had to come back for my katana. Do excuse me."

He passed by the dining table that was already set with plates and utensils, heading over to his room. His gentle yet straightforward response befuddled you without a doubt, but it hollowed your chest.

It feels like you're missing something.

"Don't wait up, I'll take longer than usual," he appears back in a rush, arranging the sheathed blade hanging by his waist.

"Oh, at least—"

"I'll see you soon, [Name]!"

His tuff of silver hair vanishes behind the panels — and you are alone.

Ah, this feeling was familiar..

It felt like the night you came upon your parents' unmoving figures.

The smile on your face was bittersweet.

You knew what was missing.

He wasn't calling you 'nee-san' anymore.

≿————-　❈　————-≾

a/n: well that's a way to end a fluffy scenario... ah, i think i'll be making a separate masterlist for scenarios so it doesn't clump. eeee~ thanks for reading!

≿————-　taglist　————-≾

@lehra @melkxsh

Blooming ✤ 4NEMO

B l o o m i n g

A/N: The amount of time I took to draw that (^) banner just to have it for 4nemo ficlets— a-ah, I love how it turned out anyway soOOO- anyway! This is sort of 4nemo’s… origin story? At least my take in how the group was built. 

There will be three parts to this, Blooming, Falling, and Loving! (And a bonus angst because it won’t be me without angst, Withering)

✤ she/her

Words: 4.1k

≿————-　❈　————-≾

A dream is a wish your heart makes—isn’t that a saying from a fairytale? 

Keep reading

despair! | genshin impact smau ++ kazuha x fem!reader

“it’s not love I swear, it might be closer to despair”

summary— what happens if your childhood friend you used to hate is now ur seatmate?

contains— enemies to friends. , fluff, angst, crack, pre and post pandemic au!, childhood friends, —okay maybe to possibly lovers

status— 02-27-22 , ongoing!

note— this story is heavily connected to my other smau ‘someone you like’ so if you’re going for the xiao route, please read ‘someone you like’ until chapter five and after finishing act one of this, you can stop there and continue with the xiao smau

if you’re going for the kazuha route, you don’t have to read the xiao one and just finish both acts for this one!!

if you want both routes on the other hand, read ‘someone you like’ until chapter five, finish act on of this, finish reading someone you like until the end, then start on act two with this smau

chapters!

ACT ONE

one— finding new friends

two— she’s ugly

three— we’re only friends because our parents are

four— two best friends locked in a closet,, jk they aren’t friends

five— paper rings

six— seatmates for the entire year

seven— feelings fade

eight— different person

nine— anything to keep friendships

ten— he’s cute ig

eleven— are you dumb? I wouldn’t let some guy get in the way of our friendship

twelve— misunderstandings possibly cleared?

thirteen— misunderstandings not cleared

fourteen— third year, starts

fifteen— watching her

sixteen— in his arms again

ACT TWO

tba!!

taglist!open— @renuqi @yay-im-fucking-trash @lunavixia @snowggvk @nebulaera @tkooooop @yanderehornyyae @yaemikosblogg

if ur url is highlighted, it means you cannot be tagged.

Childe: Must be hard not being able to laugh.

Xiao: I do have a sense of humor you know.

Childe: I've never heard you laugh before.

Xiao: I've never heard you say anything funny.

光華容彩祭

girls night out 💖💄🌙  #SailorMoon

✈️ welcome home

Title: 13 Stepbrothers; Your new home

Character(s): Zhongli, Diluc, Kaeya, Ayato, Albedo, Childe/Tartaglia, Thoma, Venti, Xiao, Kazuha, Arataki Itto, Chongyun, Bennett

Summary: Modern au; You were young when your father was planning on remarrying again. Your father is always busy always outside the country for work that his fiance said that you could stay at the teyvat residence, and live with 13 of your future stepbrothers!

Note: Inspired by the anime Brother's conflict (kinda?), but I just wanted to write for something platonic really so this happened.

Warnings/tags: Fem!reader, the reader is around 6 years old here, this is purely platonic, this is also a crack story and not to be taken seriously. not the best relationship between daughter and father hinted, but other than that it is pure fluff! Over 8k

How It Happened

You clung to your father as he pushed you to the people he trusts to take care of you while he would be gone with his fiance abroad overseas. You were a small child, 6 years old and scared as you were in the center of strangers who will soon be your stepbrothers. You weren't sure what to do but hold on to your father's hand refusing to let go as your soon to be stepmother laughed at how adorable you were.

You looked down, a bit scared but at the same time a bit excited that you will now have a bigger family.

You have always been alone ever since you were probably born, your mother and father both had you at a late age and when your mother gave birth to you she passed away a few hours later. Your father loved you, truly he did! But he can't look at you in the face as you only reminded him of your mother so he started to pour everything into his work leaving only a little time with you. He would leave you to a nanny almost every day and when he had to leave the country for a few days or months for work he would give you to his relatives.

He was a rich man and he gave you almost everything, you never really lacked most things. If you told him that you wanted a toy it would be in your hands the next day, yet the only thing that he could never give was his time. Too busy, instead he would just apologize to you kissing the crown of your head as he tells you that he could next time, and yet when you asked again it was the same thing.

You finally understood that he didn't really have time for you, instead, you would just hug that pink bunny that he has gifted to you a long time ago. One that he picked by himself one that you didn't ask for, but cherished because it was proof to you that he loves you.

You would watch other kids talk to their parents, as they spent time together. Cartoons and animations that showed hugs that the main character and their parents would have, you would crave it. But there was also another thing that you wanted, a sibling…

Someone to be around, right by your side. It didn't matter if they were younger or older than you. You would prefer if you could have multiple siblings so you would be less alone so when you asked your father for a sibling, you didn't get an answer and that was the end of that...

So it was a surprise when he suddenly asked you if you were okay with him getting married again? Were you supposed to yell at him telling him how he betrayed mom or how he is going to abandon you? You watched a few dramas and movies where a child would react that way when they heard the news that one of their parents where marrying again.

But you don't remember your mom, having no memories of her. You wondered if he would abandon you but when he suddenly told you how the person he wishes to marry has 13 sons, your eyes immediately glittered. You wanted a family of more than two, you wanted siblings, people with who you could be with and not feel the gap when you were with a nanny or babysitter or how you would at your cousins enviously when they talk to their parents.

So hesitantly you nodded watching your father sigh in relief that you were okay with him marrying again. And after two or three months your father told you to pack up cause you are moving from the flat you lived in.

You asked him in the car after you and he packed your necessities, clothes, your favorite toys and such where you guys were going did he tell you that you are gonna now live with your soon to be stepbrother. Your father had finally confessed to the person he wished to marry and now the both of them were wearing their engagement rings you noticed the thin piece of metal on your father's ring finger as he drove making a turn.

He told you that when she heard that you were living almost practically alone she grew mad at him and burst into anger and told him that you should at least then stay with her son in the teyvat residence where it was a big modern mansion like flat with a connected living room and kitchen. Four floors where the first and second floor is used for rent while the upper floors were for the family.

You would have your own room and bathroom. But you will also get 13 brothers who you care about you more than a nanny would or so your father's fiance said. Your father's fiance expressed feelings feeling of concern that it would be awkward between you and her sons as not only was everything sudden, some of them were actually old enough to be your father. So really what she also wanted was time for you to get used to your new and very big family.

Your father has met her sons a few times in the past and thought that it would not be a bad idea and agreed to bring you to the residence.

So here you are now. In front of your future stepbrothers, not all of them were here only a few but it was scary as you continued to cling to your pink bunny rabbit...

Zhongli

Lawyer | Age: 30

The oldest in the family, he is the leader as his mother would always be out of the country for some business and now more on travels. Zhongli is the one who gathers the family when their an event and keeps them up to date. The brother all trust their brother except when something is needed to be paid. That one, they would handle as they all know that he always forgets to bring his wallet with him.

He was used to his family, the ruckus and their personalities. He was the one who watched most of them grow up and become adults, he is always busy but he always makes time for his family. But still, it was rather sudden for him when he was told that he would have a young sister soon, as the family has been all men for the longest time. He wasn't sure if he could take care of you at first as he only took care of boys and all, but when his mother told him how you were almost always alone at home he was a bit reluctant to say no.

Zhongli was told to ready a room on the 3rd floor near the living room before you arrived so he wasn't surprised when he saw you with your father and with a few pieces of luggage right beside your dad that seemed to belong to you as your dad told him that he would be leaving you in his care.

“Hello, my name is Zhongli.”

Zhongli was a busy man but when he couldn't take care of you he would make sure to ask a brother to watch over you. But when he could, he would work at home in the living room as you stayed beside him doing your homework, drawing or watching tv. He liked you, but he wasn't really attached to you unlike his other brother, Zhongli just chalked it up to time. He needed to spend time with you to actually look at you as a little sister.

So one day when he had time to pick you up and not ask his other brother to pick you up due to his usually busy schedule, he was surprised when you handed him a paper with a drawing of him and his brothers. It was badly drawn, with just circles and squares for a body and with uneven eyes and red smiles. But it was warm and he knew that you spent a lot of time on the drawing. Thanking you he noticed that you didn't draw yourself on the drawing and when he asked you you just awkwardly looked away.

Unable to ignore this, that day when the two of you got back to the residence he sat you down in the living room on the table with crayons and color pencils. Giving you a blank paper he told you to draw on it and that was your homework from him. You were reluctant at first but you did what he said and when you were done he took the drawing inspecting it. It felt almost like a test when he finally nodded at your work but it took you by surprise when he started cutting around your drawing.

So when you saw him gluing the picture of you and pasting it right in the middle of your drawing of him and his brothers, you didn't know how to react. But that day you were in his arms as you cried on his shoulders. You don't know why you cried, but that day was the day Zhongli finally thought of you as family.

It is still hanging on the fridge.

__________

Diluc

Has his own wine company | Age: 28

Second oldest, he lives outside the residence in his own house. He would occasionally visit, home. But he isn't really the closest to his siblings compared to the other brothers. He was probably the last to know that you moved in… by bumping into you in a corner of the corridor.

Why was a small girl here, how did she come in… Diluc was sure that Chongyun and Bennett are both middle school students and not kindergarten students that they would bring a small kid like you as a friend… He would not put it past some of his siblings to joke about getting or even stealing a sister but never in a million years did he think that they would actually do it!

When he found out who you were, he was furious as to why he was never told about the fact that you are his mother's fiances daughter and that you now live here!! He glared at Kaeya who Zhongli asked to tell him and comfortably forgot.

He didn't like that you now live here, taking the room that was also once his as he moved out around 3 years ago which is fine… but like why did your father decide it was the best idea to leave you with them who were practically strangers? He didn't like the situation but you misunderstood and thought he hated you. (Kaeya later told you that he didn't hate you and that you don't have to return the room to him.)

He didn't really think that he would interact with you much after all he didn't live in the mansion, and that was the case for months till Zhongli called him asking him if he was free to pick you up from the kindergarten on the way as Diluc had to grab some things from the house. He wasn't sure at first but reluctantly searched your kindergarten up on his phone’s map.

After awkwardly talking to the teachers of your school, you finally hopped into his car… silent. Diluc found it a bit awkward so he started asking questions (mostly about your father), but you would only answer with one word and grunts. He glanced at you and finally saw your rather gloomy face, he sighed and parked his car.

Diluc asked what was the matter but he didn't get a proper reply, mostly you just avoiding his eyes. When he asked did something happened at school you shook your head, but hesitantly took out a piece of paper and showed it to him. Reading he finally understood what was going on.

The paper was about a parent-teacher’s meeting and if he was not mistaken which he rarely is, your father and his mother are in another country on a date or something. When he asked you when your father was coming back home, you told him that it was after a month. He looked at the schedule and noticed it was next week.

He didn't say much after that, he took you home and such but he didn't give you back the paper only to suddenly tell you that he would be the one attending this and that you don't really have to tell Zhongli and that he would. But really it was a huge surprise to you when you saw him the next week wearing a suit as he talked to the teacher.

Other kids asked if he was your dad as they have never seen your dad ever, even the teacher in the next class asked you if he was your dad.

“Please don't worry, her father isn't available right so I am the one replacing him for the parent teacher’s meeting.”

Diluc didn't know why he was so inclined to go to this meeting for you, but seeing you so sad that your father could not come to the meeting he impulsive decided that he would be the one who would go. The smile that you gave him when the two of you went to get ice cream made all his coming regrets leave him.

He would start to take candy anywhere with him, and when he sees you he would place candy on your hands after a short talk. Kaeya would tease him for it as he was one of the few brothers who vehemently refused you moving to the teyvat residence.

Which he choose to ignore.

__________

Kaeya

Adopted son, Famous Model | Age: 28

Kaeya was abandoned at a young age by his father and was later adopted into the family. Watching you he understood your hesitation and the hopeful look that you had in your eyes about the prospect of having a family. When he found out that his mother was dating he did a bit of background research on your dad to see what the man was like. He found out that he had a daughter you.

After a few questions he asked his mom, he found out how you lived. While you had most things, it wasn't hard for him to guess that you didn't really have the best father and daughter relationship with your dad. Too apart, disconnected, envious of others yet unable to do anything, you were a family yet at the same time apart. So when it was his turn to greet you he smiled kindly, with a little mischievous in his eyes as you looked at him curiously yet shy.

“Hello, my name is Kaeya. It is nice to meet you, my future little sister.”

It was a surprise to many when Kaeya took his time to talk to you, not that he did anything weird he always took care of his little siblings when he could and it wasn't like he was bad with kids! Yet his brother would always look at him in shock when they saw you and him chatting, when you are so awkward and shy around the other brothers but looked completely comfortable with him. They were bound to think that something was wrong!!!

When Ayato and Childe glare at him, he would just grin at them teasing them that he was one of the few that got close to you than them first. There were a few times he held you in his arms, as you looked sleepy taking you to your room as Venti whines that he could also do that, why do you have to be more comfortable with him?! Kaeya always listens to you, he was always kind but not pushy. He would tease you often but never too far.

There was one time when you finished school did Kaeya picked you up as all your siblings were busy. He had a modeling appointment that day, so instead of going back home you and he headed to his work. The people all cooed at you, surprised as they teased Kaeya on the fact that he never told him that he has such a cute sister.

That day there was a surprise model shoot where Kaeya and you modeled together. It did go on the magazines or anything but Kaeya was able to get copies of it to flaunt to his siblings.

__________

Albedo

Scientist | Age: 27

Albedo didn't give a huge reaction, as if he didn't care... almost. Sure he was glad that his old mother has gotten married again and would not be alone once again but what he thinks of you coming to the house... nothing really. Too focused on his research and all to dislike or like the idea and all.

Albedo wasn't there when you first arrived at the residence, meeting you at the kitchen late at night

The first thing that went through his mind right then was that you were less troublesome than his senior coworker Alice's daughter, Klee. As he hands you a glass of water that you where struggling to get as the cups were too high for you to reach.

A mental note to make a place for cups where you could comfortably grab.

Albedo was rather good with kids, no that many of his family knew. So that one time when he found you alone in the living room he took the role of watching over you. He had time and all so it didn't really matter. Small talk leads to you asking what he does for work, science then led to him telling you many facts he knows about birds and butterflies.

Albedo didn't mind having a sister, in fact, he adored you when he could. While not as out there as say Childe and Ayato he would let you play with his art supplies and you would start going to him when you had an art homework you needed to do.

There was that one time he took you to the science lab as Rhinedottir found out that he now had a sister and had ordered him to bring you here so that she could meet you. Both Rhinedottir and Alice noticed you come into the lab holding Albedo's hand all the while looking excitedly at everything and while it is not really noticeable they did notice a tint of pride in Albedo's walk and the shine in his eyes as he teaches you what he does here.

Really it is just too cute. How he would blow the hot chocolate so that you won't burn your tongue when you drink it before giving it to you. As he watch you and Klee talk with each other, playing with dodoco which he looked at them as if to ask if it was really alright for you to play with bombs. He trusts Klee but my, it is just adorable that they could watch the usually quiet and stoic boy fret over somebody.

__________

Ayato

Model | Age: 26

A rather popular actor, he is famous for the many roles that he got. Currently, he is for a series called ‘Genshin’ where a traveler lost his sibling, Ayato is working as one of the many side characters but because of how many people like him he is probably coming back.

When Ayato heard that he would be getting a sister he was delighted really. Ever since he was little he always wanted to have a little sister and kept asking his mother if he could have a little sister… but in reality was always awkward when he told his mother that he wants a sister that look just like him when she already broke up with her husband, his dad.

Ayato didn't ask anymore when he understood the situation of his family.

After he heard that his mother was going to marry again after so many failed marriages he started to lose a lot of hope in his mother’s love life.... till he heard that her fiance has a little daughter but he choose to ignore it as he has grown up and out of that phase of wanting a little sister for the longest time…. Till he heard that you were coming to stay with them…

Wait what??

Sure Ayato wants a sister and all but not like this…? You were so young he wasn't sure if it was alright to separate you from your father. Was what he thought till your father told him that it was alright and that the two of you were used to it… Ayato started to deeply dislike your father, out of everything Ayato always valued family and to see you alone, your father countries away as if you don't mind him.. looking as if you were used to it... made his blood boil.

But it wasn't his place to say anything so instead, he choose to watch over you, be that person who your father cant be and become someone who you could look up to. Ayato tried to get to know you… but…. Why are you running away from him??

After trying to talk to you multiple times Ayato found out from Zhongli that you were scared of him. Which surprised him actually, like why? Why were you scared of him, he doesn't look scary, does he? He didn't understand…

He tried to get close to you with gifts and presents even food as it seemed to work for Thoma. But you continued to avoid him when he smiles at you, almost in tears. Kaeya and Childe made so much fun of him.

One day you wanted to go to the playground, you asked Albedo if he could take you to the playground but unfortunately, he was too busy to do so. So instead Albedo asked Ayato to take you to the playground. Ayato took this as an opportunity to get close to you and said yes.

That the walk to the playground was one of the most awkward trips that he had ever had. You were quick to head to the swings when you finally got the chance. Ayato sighed as he watched you play on the swings he planned on reading a book but he was rather thirsty so when he spotted a boba shop he choose to make a quick trip there.

When he came back with two boba drinks in his hands he noticed you yelling at a group of boys. They told you that the park was theirs and that you should just scram if you didn't want to get hurt. Ayato could see your fear but you stayed where you were glaring at them, it wasn't until one of the boys suddenly choose to pull your hair did he intervene stepping right behind you as he looked at the boy who was pulling your hair and the other kids.

When the kids saw him they all froze, Ayato even noticed the “leader” peed themselves on their pants. He didn't threaten them, he said nothing horrible really but maybe it was because of his angry tone that they ran off scared... probably.

Ayato sighed suddenly feeling rather tired, till he suddenly heard a small “thank you” and saw that it was you who said it, not avoiding him but instead looking at him in the eyes.

After that, he just tried to spoil you every day. Dear! if only he had taken a video that time.

__________

Childe / Tartaglia

Works at a toy company | Age: 25

Childe was a son when their father married a woman for like around 5 years or something, things didn't work and it just got worst and worst that they choose to have a divorce. They wanted nothing from each other and when it came to their children they decided to she would take the oldest with her while the ex-husband would take the 3 other kids with him.

When Childe caught wind that his mother is remarrying and that her fiance has a small daughter. He was absolutely ecstatic!! A younger sister? Of course, he would love to meet her! And the fact that she might stay here is even better! He does have a blood related younger sister but his father who took his three blood related younger siblings choose to leave the country and while Childe could talk to his sibling by call or video chat in the end they are not together and it is difficult when he had to watch his sibling grow farther and farther from him it is just... disappointing.

Childe loves children, he adores his younger siblings... apart of the triplets… They make his blood boil. Thoma is cute but too mature sometimes but Childe spoils Itto, Bennett and Chongyun a lot. But in the end, they are all boys nobody was really able to fill the empty role of his young sister. Childe genuinely wanted to coo at how adorable you were when he first saw you but held himself.

“Hey, my name is Ajax but you can call me Childe! Nice to meet you, little sis.”

If he only could, he wants to grab you and go shopping, buying you everything that you were interested in and touched. Give you a pretty tiara and pinks gowns, play with you and all so to see you actively run away from him as if scared of him he started to pout.

Childe started to whine when he would see you grow close to other siblings even more than him even tho he was trying his best to get close to you unlike them! Diluc had to yell at him telling his brother that he is a grown man and that he shouldn't be mopping and whining, glaring murder at his other brothers when he sees them with you, like a child.

It is just not fair, he is willing to buy you everything! Let him play with his future little sister!! Childe pouted when he watched you interact with Zhongli for once he was jealous of the oldest brother...

It was when your little bunny's right ear ripped, and you were crying did he finally have the chance to interact with you. While you were in tears, trying your best to control your sobs Childe heard your small cries from behind your door did he worry and knocked on the door asking if you were okay.

When you told him about your pink bunny rabbit, he told you to wait, heading to his room he brought a sewing kit that he had and started sewing your bunny’s ear back. You were surprised, looking at your bunny it was a bit wonky but not bad. That was Childe’s first hug he got from you.

__________

Venti

University Student | Age: 20

Venti, Xiao and Kazuha are triplets. As kids, they grew up together yet much to their mother's surprise all have vastly different personalities. When Venti found out that he was gonna have a little sister he was absolutely delighted! He saw a picture of you that your father sent to his mother and cooed at adorable you looked.

He pouted when everyonde suddenly decided that they would definitely never let you near him when he is seen with a bottle of alcohol he could handle himself!

When he finally get to meet you his eyes sparkled as waved smiling cheerfully at you. When you returned his smile tho a bit hesitantly at first he just wanted to hug and tell you over and over how adorable you are.

"Hi, my name is Venti! So you are my little sister now? You are so cute, ehe~"

While he says that would take care of you often, it is not really that… often. As the boy was always out with friends till late at night partying and on the weekdays he was at university.

But when he does have the time he would teach you how to play the harp, help you do your music homework or play games with him. The two of you would pull small pranks here and there with the siblings and most of the time in the end he would be the one scolded.

One time when he came back home very late, drunk after a party. As the living rooms and the elevators are connected he wondered why the lights on the kitchen that was right beside the living room were on and headed there thinking that he would be seeing one of his brothers as he plan to annoy them or something but then he saw you.

You were placing your cup on the table when you noticed him and jump in surprised, Venti understood that you were here just to get a glass of water and was about to ask you something- He didn't remember what happened after but he woke up on the floor, with a blanket on covering him, a pillow under his head and a killer hangover.

He thought that it was one of his brothers that gave him the blanket and while thankful was quick to forget about it as this wasn't really the first time. So whenever he would come back home the next few days drunk and wake up with a blanket around him the next day. He always thought that it was his brother placing a blanket around him till Kazuha told him that, no it ain't that.

It was you who kept on covering him with a blanket, somedays Kazuha would find you waiting for Venti, when you notice that he hasn't come home. The next moment Venti was right next to you and basically asked you if what Kazuha is true which you nodded, wondering why he was asking as if him being drunk was normal or something…

Venti swore that day never to drink to the point that he would come home and end up sleeping on the floor. But he also started to try and put more effort to spending time with you.

__________

Xiao

University student | Age: 20

Xiao when he first found out that you would be coming to the teyvat residence absolutely hated it. He is too busy and a child in the house noisy as most of them are would only be annoying for him really. But he had no choice really not when most of his brothers were okay with it and his mother asked him with puppy dog eyes.

Xiao narrowed his eye at you, when he noticed you staring at his tattoos when he finally reached home after school, Venti went somewhere with his friends probably to a party while Kazuha choose to disappear for a while now. Not that he cares, it has nothing to do with him.

You flinched at his glare and looked down intimidated by his gaze, and Xiao decided to play his video games in his room instead of the living room big tv.

"Hmph."

It was a surprise to everyone when Xiao was the first brother you actually grew close with and bonded with. Childe and Ayato both were shocked when they realized this and since it was not like they could really do anything about it they became super passive-aggressive towards Xiao.

You would also be surprised if you didn't forget how scary his glare was when you first meet him. But unlike the other brothers, he was at home pretty much most of the time apart from university. Zhongli would always ask him to look after you and since Xiao had always had so much respect for his older brother he had no choice but to follow.

At first, you were given a cold shoulder as he tells you to head to the living room since he can't trust you not to break anything in his room, he would play a game on his phone or console in the living room while you would do something else.

But it was thought time did the two of you got close. One day he noticed that you were bored and in a roundabout way offered to play a game with him as he had nothing to do back then too, finding no interest in most of his regular games that day. You guys played multiple games together that day. Zhongli took many pictures of the two of you together both focused on the game you were playing at that time.

At one point he let you in his room to show you the games and all he had around. The two of you grew close and he would often give you head pats as a sign of care while acting tough and a little mean even tho know you know that Xiao actually cared about you, he would always go out of his way to help you while playing off as if he didn't want to do so. Be it grabbing a cup from the shelf you cant reach, teaching you your homework when you were confused or unsure of what to do.

Xiao would deny it whenever asked if he helped with something.

__________

Kazuha

University Student | Age: 20

Kazuha just smiled at you when you finally arrived, he didn't express any dislike maybe a bit of concern at first when he found out that your father would just leave you with them and go on to have an early honeymoon with their mother disguised as a business work.

but in the end, he didn't care as much as others.

When Kazuha first meet you was when you were trying to help Thoma clean the garden in front of the mansion. He was resting on a bench as he played with a leaf with his fingers when you looked at him curiously. Kazuha smiled at you suddenly and when he got your attention he started to play a small tune with the leaf he was holding.

He wanted to smile but couldn't when he heard a gasp and then small pit pats of steps growing closer and closer. You were quiet as you watch him in awe of how he made sounds with a leaf only when he was done did you speak telling him that was so cool and how did he do that?

“Well, that is a secret. You must be ____… I am Kazuha.”

When you found out that he was your brother, you were surprised. But maybe because of the leaf tune that he made when you two first meet he won a few points as, unlike other brothers you weren't really awkward around him. Sometimes you would bring a leaf when you see him hold a leaf in his hand as if you were going to sneakingly copy him or something. It is cute really and Kazuha was more amused than annoyed by everything.

You and he would meet up in the garden when you had the time or weren't already hanging with another brother. It wasn't really decided that you would meet him at around this time or where to meet but since you always see him in the garden at a certain time you would always try to follow it.

It was nice to have a company, unknowingly as time went on Kazuha had grown used to seeing you right beside him sometimes watching him. He was delighted when you finally made a sound with the leaf that sounded more like a PIII- than anything bit it was progress. Kazuha thought that he would be able to spend more time with you when the summer vacation starts… So imagine his surprise when he heard that you were sleeping all morning almost every day when summer vacation finally started, what he thought was the time he would spend with his little sister.

You guys don't talk often outside the garden but when he asked why you were waking up so later and when you vaguely respond that you were waiting for someone and that you didn't want them to get cold he connected the dots when Venti suddenly whined about his hangover.

Kazuha then just smiles at you and told you that nobody is going to be sleeping on the floor tonight and even after you should sleep early tonight and not sneak out past your bedtime.

You hesitantly nodded…

__________

Thoma

Highschool student | Age: 18

When Thoma heard that he might get a younger sister soon and that she was coming to live in the teyvat residence, instead of excited he was a bit worried. Worried about how others would react to meeting you, would they scare you away or will you cry since you were in a new place and outside your comfort zone and with some of his brothers right in front of your face.

His worries were proven true when he saw the excitement in his older brother Childe, Venti and his younger brother Itto, how they keep on saying that they would be the best brothers! Thoma looked at Ayato who was chuckling aright beside him as if this wasn't a problem at all, but when he saw his brother Ayato’s eye, Thoma knew there would be competition…

Thoma wasn't really able to talk to you the first time when he saw you in the living room with your dad as your father talked with the others. As he had to calm Itto down before the teen could charge into the group and probably scoop you in his arms. It was only later when you were exploring the kitchen did you meet Thoma who looked at you surprised but ended up smiling at you asking if you want to eat anything.

“Hey my name is Thoma, I am one of your brothers. Uhhh, want anything to eat?”

You quietly ate the Dango that Thoma gave you that day, and was later found by your father and Thoma’s mom who laughed as they asked if you already bonded with one of the brothers. After that when you started living in the residence it was always to Thoma did you go for snacks, as if silently labeling him as the snack keeper.

You weren't necessarily close with Thoma at first as you were with Xiao, but Thoma absolutely loves to watch you eat the food he prepared or made. Your chubby cheeks as you chew on the cake or whatever dessert or sweet he brought that day. It is a secret from the other brother but Thoma probably is the one who poked your cheeks the most, which is a surprise considering that Childe also pokes your cheeks often and surprisingly Diluc too.

Maybe because of that, you started to grow close with him too faster than other siblings Thoma is the one who you would unconsciously look for when Xiao isn't there. Maybe because of how he was always in the living room watching him clean, while you eat the fruits that he cut for you or you attempt to try and help him.

Or maybe it was that time when you actually got so sick, a high fever you stayed in bed as you unconsciously called your dad. Thoma was the one who looked after you, changing your towel when needed, giving you medicine on time and just staying right beside you watching over you.

The other brothers would have helped but it seems that day all of them apart from Thoma were all very busy and unable to cancel their appointments when they heard that you were really sick. Thoma stayed by you telling you that it was okay and that he will be by your side and when you ask if you will be alone he told you, you will never be alone.

The next day it was Thoma with the high fever.

__________

Itto

Highschool student | Age: 17

Aside from Childe and Ayato, Itto's reaction to having a baby sister was just as big. Jumping up and down asking Zhongli when he would get to meet her. Zhongli told him it won't be after a month or two depending on your father and everyday Itto would nag the oldest brother in the family asking him when you would come to visit family and when he could see you.

Although he has two brothers younger than him Itto always dreamed of having an even younger sibling where he could act like his older siblings where they could look for him when they need help and care. And sure he helps his two younger brothers but he wishes that he has a sibling where he could carry them on his shoulders and show them how awesome he is! Chongyun and Bennett do look up to him but Itto still wants a younger sibling where he could read storybooks too and carry them with one arm just as how his older siblings has done for him when he was a kid.

So when he finally saw you Itto almost threw himself at you if not for the fact that Thoma was holding him back telling Itto that he might scare you.

"You may call the Awesome Me, Big brother Itto!"

Itto at first tried to get close to you, but maybe because of how pushy he was you started to actively avoid him that he became almost like a sad puppy as he watched you interact with Albedo, Kaeya and even Xiao just fine. He wanted to be that awesome brother too!!

So when you saw him almost mopping around as Kaeya told you that he is surprised that Itto was like this as he never saw the boy this sad before you knew it was your fault.

So "carefully" you approached him, and Itto could not be anymore happier! Following what Thoma said he tried his best not to scare you away, which most of the time failed really badly. But the more you got used to Itto's personality the more you open up in the end, so it didn't hugely matter. Just Itto being Itto

Itto would go around almost yelling at his school how he got the best younger sister in the whole wide world. And would flaunt all the pictures the two of you had taken together. One time when Zhongli took you to Itto’s school to pick him up, Itto yelled when he saw you. Grabbing you and placing you on his shoulders he ran back to his school yelling that his little sister is here and how you are so adorable. See! See!! He has the best sister!!

From the beginning, he is the one who always yelled out loudly that you were his sister and that you and he were family! When you felt so lonely there was a high chance he could be in a corner just waiting to scare you by saying family or little sis! Always telling you that you belong to the family even tho your father and their mother weren't even married yet. It made it easier for you to open up, otherwise, it would probably take even more time for you to come out of your shell.

__________

Chongyun

Middle school student | Age: 14

Chongyun thought you were a ghost the first time he meet you, late at night when you were looking for something to eat when it was difficult to leave your room as you were still shy back then. Chongyun had heard that a little girl moved to the residence, he didn't have time to meet you as he was busy with studies and training martial arts.

So in a dark living room, the only light coming from the fridge is kind of freaky most children would think. Chongyun spotted you, almost glowing from the light of the fridge and screamed. He didn't know what he was thinking when he moved to hit you thinking that he must exorcise you, he wasn't thinking and moved on instinct thinking that if he hit you once you would be gone.

The poor boy was topped by Albedo, who was watching over you that day as he was worried that you didn't eat much that day. He didn't want to scare you by appearing so suddenly in this dark place so he hid, only to have to come out of his hiding when he saw Chongyun about to hit you.

He woke up the whole building, all the brothers woke up when they heard Chongyun’s shout (Thinking that Chongyun was probably seeing things as it wasn't the first time) and bolted out of their rooms when they heard the cries of a small girl. DID CHONGYUN HIT YOU?? The boy was furiously apologizing to you as you cling to Zhongli’s arms, frightened and crying.

After that you avoided him, whenever you see him you would retreat to your room which broke the small kid's heart really, some of his brothers chuckled the first time but grew to pity their little brother when it became constant.

Chongyun tried to talk to you at dinner, but half of the time you ignored him or just hesitantly answered him avoiding eye contact. At this point, Kaeya stepped in and took you to another room and explained the misunderstanding, while Zhongli and the other brothers did try to explain they didn't do exactly well and still left the awkwardness in the air.

Kaeya told you that Chongyun was really sorry and that it was all a misunderstanding, the man added a small joker two telling you that even he would be scared of the fridge ghost. You laughed and finally listened, planning on giving Chongyun another chance. So when you opened your door, in front of you was Chongyun holding two popsicles in his hands.

“Ummm… I wanted to give you a popsicle… Do you… want one?”

After that the two of you started talking again, it was awkward at first but Chongyun felt a bit of pride when he showed you all the gymnastics he could do, he had to be careful not to show you too much fighting worried that you might be scared again but the giggles and wows that he got from you when he does a handstand or something similar fills him with pride.

He didn't remember what he thought when he heard that you will be living here at the teyvat residence. He probably didn't care much, but not that you are here and will become his little sister he didn't mind and really like it and when you ask if you could do the same as him he promised you that he would teach you how to do it.

Of course with another brother present and a lot of soft mats if case you get hurt while you try to jump… Chongyun might have become a wee bit protective

__________

Bennett

Middle school student | Age: 14

When Bennett heard that he was gonna get a little sister when his mother is going to remarry, Bennet grew excited. He wasn't as loud with it as Itto and Childe, but he was skipping when he went back to his room… not before tripping on a wire cable. Bennet was actually adopted into the family similar like Kaeya as his parents died in a car crash. Their friend then took pity on Bennett and adopted him, so here he was now.

Even with Kaeya, Bennett occasionally felt outcasted from the family so to him when you join the family he felt he won't be alone anymore!- Not that he wants to outcast you from his family, no! He wants to be the one who welcomes you, be beside you like what Kaeya had done for him and this time become a big brother after always being the younger brother! Arge it is hard to explain- but Bennett is definitely happy!!

Bennett's second meeting with you was when he saw you in the living room alone, he wanted to greet you, and halfway to his hello he tripped again on wires and fell on his face. He didn't break anything but he got a small cut on his face from somewhere he wasn't sure.

You looked at him in worry your shyness gone out of concern for him as you run towards him asking Bennett if he was alright? He told you he was alright but you suddenly stood up and ran to your room before he could say anything else and came back with a pink bandaid with bunnies on it, sticking it on his face. All the boy could do was grin and thank you for it.

It wasn't on purpose, really that he started tripping on wire or anything really right in front of you. He wished he didn't show you such an uncool side of him but what happened happened and it is not like he could really do anything about it.

His brothers teased him about how many bandaids he had that was pink and bunny design. But it was cute and instead of him being a big bro you became a nagging and watchful little sis that constantly worried about him and later he would get a kiss from your pink bunny doll on top of the bandaid while you started to sing for the pain to go away.

So imagine his surprise when Ayato called him to pick you up from the kindergarten as he suddenly had work that day only to see you being picked up by the other kids in the kindergarten the teacher was nowhere in sight. He heard them say that you were motherless and that your father would leave soon after and that he didn't want you since he always outside the country, away from you. They said mean things over and over and over... that you don't have a family...

You started to cry when one of the kids try to take your rabbit doll away did Bennett scream at them to leave you alone. Seeing a boy older than them the kids got scared and ran away just not before pushing you to the floor. He picked you up as you cried in your arms telling him what they said was right and that you were alone.

He hugged you tight, telling you that it was alright and the bullies were gone he told you that you had a family and that it was with him your brother! and also that your other brothers were all waiting for you at home, that your family is waiting for you at home.

When you finally collected yourself you told him that you and him weren't family and that this was different. But Bennett stopped you with a smile as he placed a bandaid on your nose where there was a small cut there.

"You are family! It doesn't matter if we are not blood-related or if our parents have yet to marry. I think of you as family and brothers all of them all think of you as family and nothing could change that!"

Some things to take note of~ (or just notes of things I was thinking when I was writing this)

♡ Reader's father should be around his late 40s (early 40s when the reader was born.) While your mother was in her 30s when she gave birth to the reader. They always wanted to have a kid but it never really happened so the reader was a happy surprise that time.

♡ Reader's soon to be stepmother married multiple times excluding your father she married a total of 3 times.

♡ Her first husband she had Zhongli, Diluc, Albedo and Ayato till they got separated. Childe was with her second husband she had another 3 kids with him but he took them when they separated, while with her third husband she gave birth to the triplets Venti, Xiao and Kazuha then Thoma, Itto and Chongyun. Kaeya and Bennett being adopted.

♡ She should be around her 50s right now

♡ Readers father's job had something to do with being a traveler, so that is kinda why he would go out often while his fiance and reader's soon to be step mother is a rich lady with her own business and all but sold it when she choose to retire early. She met your father when the two of them were in a foreign country. And they somehow clicked.

♡ There is a chance where you/reader got close with Kaeya, Albedo, Thoma and Xiao first, and Ayato and Childe absolutely hate it. (Kaeya and Albedo because in canon they took care of Klee and for Xiao’s reason is a bit more elaborate; the reader here has always been alone so brothers like Childe and Itto can be overwhelming for her Xiao is just the opposite which would be nice after the sudden change of atmosphere. Thoma... is obvious.. and not because I adore this boy too much..)

♡ It is kinda hinted that the reader knows a drunkard before coming to the teyvat residence on Venti's part. Reader's father asked many of his relatives to take care of you and while not written here close friends too. Use that info as you wish.

Note: This was not supposed to be this long..... like I was probably thinking around....2k words...? but things keep adding and adding and this happened and now this is the longest post I ever made~

Some characters had more text than others, I know that but I didn't want to spend even more time on this than what I have done already. I hope you understand.

But all in all, I am happy with how it turned out and I hope you like it! comment or reblog this if you do!! I really love reading your thoughts!

Other than that.... it is almost 3 am I thought I would be done with this 3 hours ago, soooooo~ good night guys and have a nice day/night~ zzzzzzz

i just know kaeya slapped dilucs sunburn at some point

Well okay then

“Someone who won’t run away” and now homeboy is running away from him , himself 😭

Credits to luty_nii on instagram

Some Ragnvindr Brothers doodles

my take on the scene we didn’t have the pleasure of witnessing

my girl yanfei serves only the LAW in the court of JUSTICE 🏐🔥

the pretty boys with the pretty flowers 🏵

ponytail albedooo 🏵️

Attachment

AKA single dad susbedo that never even lasted a week

Attachment

AKA single dad susbedo that never even lasted a week

different uniform. different side.

this is beautiful i—*sobs*

# 0.03 - THE THIRD WISH.

╰ ‘I wish to learn how to make flower crowns.’ | Chapter 3 of ‘The Five Wishes You Fulfilled For Me Before I Died’ series

ㅤㅤ— join the taglist | masterpost | previous | next

HE SCOLDS YOU FOR CALLING HIS NAME FOR NO REASON AT ALL and yet whenever you don't, he frowns and asks about your whereabouts. the yaksha that guards over liyue is certainly a strange character and an adoring laugh would've slipped out of you if you weren't too busy trying to wash away the metallic taste of blood in your mouth. amongst the cards delivered to your hands, you realized that one person hadn't sent one. of course, you didn't expect anything from him of all people but you were suddenly filled with the desire to seek his presence. now though, you wondered if you're still in any shape to converse casually. the dried tears that stuck to your cheeks made you look disheveled and though it was dark, you don't doubt that his piercing amber eyes would take note of it immediately. was your body's exhaustion really this fast approaching?

"i told you to speak my name when you need help," a voice from behind you flatly states. you don't do so much as flinch. you'd know that voice even from afar.

"xiao... it's been a while, huh? how do you do?"

the man in question frowns even deeper, allowing his polearm to disperse into fragments of lights before he approached your keeled-over form, "what are you croaking about? speak up. i can't hear you."

"gee, a little understanding, please?"

you didn't really take offense. if you had, then there was no way you could've befriended the sharp-tongued man who was just a few steps away from you by now. perhaps it was just a worthless attempt but you hoped that your little comment was enough to distract him, even just a little, from the gruesome sight you weren't able to clean up. who would've known that he was always watching your back from afar?

"who did that?"

"no one," you muttered, tense. it sounded more like a furious demand than a question and you don't think that you've ever heard such animosity from him ever since you met. heck, the way he spoke about his karma sounds tender compared to the tone he used now! "hey, calm down."

"you're bleeding. you need help."

xiao, despite not believing your words, motioned for you to come towards him. as much as he wanted to reshuffle the cards dealt by fate to whoever was dumb enough to lay a hand on you, he knew that he should probably find someone to assist you first. verr goldet should still be awake, he thinks as he glances at the moon that watched the scene curiously. time flows differently for the adepti and he couldn't be bothered to carry a watch when it doesn't apply to him but if he were to guess, it shouldn't be more than thirty past eight in the evening.

"i'm fine. there's nothing you can do to help me," you waved your hand haphazardly as you tried to stand, only to find xiao crouching in front of you.

"..." he grits his teeth, trying his hardest to fight the heat that was climbing up his pale neck, "what are you waiting for? it's faster this way so... just hurry up."

a confused sound escapes you and you half-believed that you just redefined speechlessness as you stared at his back. shifting your weight from one leg to another, you ultimately freeze as xiao turns his head slightly, just enough to meet your gaze impatiently but you knew him well enough to recognize the same shade of embarrassment on his pupils. deciding to cut the both of you some slack, you cautiously mounted his back and with an ease that made your heart skip a beat, he adjusted your position so you laid more comfortably and securely. despite your nervous fidgeting (caused by the very sharp reminder that his hands were firmly holding onto the flesh of your thighs), xiao doesn't seem to be having any trouble carrying your weight.

"um... i'm really fine... you don't need to do this. i must be really heavy, 'm so sorry..."

he only scoffs, squeezing your thighs as if to reprimand you, "you underestimate the strength of the adepti. this is nothing compared to what i have held long ago."

you don't reply, ashamed that you're taking this situation of context and even more ashamed that you're absolutely enjoying it. distracted by your fleeting thoughts, you don't notice that you have slowly nuzzled into the crook of his neck. it wasn't your intention but your subconscious desperately craved the warmth that exudes from his body. by the time you realized what you were doing, it was too late and you pretended to do it on purpose just because it felt a smidge less embarrassing.

with your bodies awfully close together, xiao desperately prayed that you didn't notice the way his breath hitched as your small sigh fanned a hot gust of air over his sensitive skin. he also prayed that you don't hear the wild pumping of his heart because he, himself, couldn't hear anything aside from that.

"xiao?" he tensed up, surprised at the intense thoughts that floated in his mind at the innocent call of his name. you're too near. you had only whispered his name prettily but in his mind, you might as well have screamed it until both his ears bled, "do you mind if we stop by dihua marsh first?"

"what? are you out of your mind? you're injured—"

"i promise i'm not—"

he ignores you're lighthearted laugh as he nearly growls, unconsciously digging his dull nails into your thighs that formed small, crescent-like engraving on your plush skin, "i can smell your blood from afar."

"hey, i really promise i'm fine. in fact, you can check for injuries right here and now!"

xiao pauses and you take it as him thinking over his options. when you slowly slid out of his grasp and he wordlessly let you, a small victorious smile curved on your lips, "if i see anything, i'm taking you to wangshu inn immediately and you better not utter another complaint."

"yes, yes... i understand. no need to frown so much," he doesn't speak of the bright twinkle in your eyes as you shrugged your coat off, twirling once to show that true to your words, no trace of blood could be seen on your clothes. aside from the remnants of the gore on your palms, you looked unscathed and xiao realized that he could finally breathe again.

"if you're not injured, what was that on your hand?"

you knew he'd ask eventually but that didn't stop the recoil from coming. nervously looking at the side, you took one long breath in before plastering a smile on your face as you met his ever-serious gaze, "about that... care to chat in a place more comfortable?"

xiao curiously raised a brow despite the seemingly permanent scowl on his face. still, he offered his gloved hand quite roughly though it was more endearing in your eyes, "to dihua marsh, right?"

"if it isn't too much trouble..."

"isn't it too late to say that?"

you only laughed at his little grumble, knowing full well that he doesn't mind taking you anywhere you wanted to go. why else would he go out of his way to accompany you to sal terrae three days after you mentioned it in passing? taking his hand gingerly, he immediately pulls you closer to him, and almost as quickly, a heady scent envelops you. for someone who claims that aromas do not cling to him after grueling hours of hunt, you sure could pinpoint that the fragrance on his clothes was one of the refreshing scents of qingxin flowers and honey-roasted almonds. it's faded now and you purse your lips in worry. surely that must mean that he hasn't been resting? xiao had the habit of having his beloved dish during the morning during the winter season, having been too exhausted by the increasing amounts of exorcisms he needed to do to bother eating upon his return.

shaking away your worry, you try to ignore the other underlying stench that coats him. death. it's nothing unpleasant like the decaying flesh of a cold corpse but there was something unique about it that you could recognize it as that. it was hard to describe but once you meet someone on their deathbed, you'll know. it's the scent of a fast-approaching demise carried by hundreds of volatile materials. who were you kidding? he deals with death so, of course, he'll smell like it. or maybe you've finally lost it and whatever scent you carried had rubbed off on him with your close proximity.

closing your eyes, you tried to focus on the good parts. the scent of the candied chestnuts and sweet potatoes that you ate earlier in your festival meal, the faint floral residue of the perfume you wore, the quick whiff you got of saltwater and sea plants... ah, you arrived. peering over xiao's shoulder, you tried to find a suitable spot to rest. you wouldn't appreciate your socks getting wet so definitely not near the waters. you have a hard time removing the dirt stains on your clothes so not the hills. the other parts are occupied by monsters and you couldn't be bothered with defeating them first.

biting back a sigh, you rolled your shoulders back. you might've been unusually picky tonight but you were about to relay some life-changing news. comfortability should be your right because soon it wouldn't even matter anymore. you swear it's just about that. you were certainly not procrastinating on the inevitable.

"we're here. speak now and fulfill your end of the bargain."

you chuckle nervously, "you really need to relax a little... would it kill you to be softer?"

"softness would do me no favors and neither would your avoidance. tell me now or i'll find out for myself."

" woah, there... is that a threat? we're not enemies here. i think i should remind you that."

he says your name once, eyes narrowed in a warning and you sigh in defeat, "okay. fine. i'm sick."

"sick? then shouldn't you be resting?"

you sighed, leaning against the trunk of an old tree, "like i said, it wouldn't help me."

"hmph. you mortals are so difficult. you say one thing and the other says another—"

"i'm dying," you interrupt him with a humorless smile, "there's no recovering no matter what i do so i'm out here walking while i still can. it's sad, isn't it?"

xiao swallows as he feels his blood freeze over. surely not? of all the people in liyue, he was one of those that painfully knew the permanency of death the best. it was not something to be thrown around as a foul joke! anger swells up in his chest but as he eyes the distraught hidden in your carefree smile, he finds his words dying in his throat. surely not...

"i was out here to say goodbye to you because... there probably won't be a next time. when you found me, i was just about to call for you but my body beat you to it."

he was certain that he was being delusional. of course, he has to be! the weight of his karma must've finally made his nightmares bleed into reality but that was it, wasn't it? nightmares, dreams... all of it could come blurring into the reality he perceives but they would never amount to be anything but that. dreams are dreams and reality is reality. there was no way that someone as pure and gentle as you would be fated to an early death. that was not how karma works. he would know.

"xiao? it's... a good time to say something? i'm getting pretty scared of your silence..."

the yaksha doesn't speak, doesn't breathe even as his fingers trembled at his side. you look too weak, too fragile to be the person he once knew. you try to reach out to him — anything to snap him out of his confused daze but he backs away. he backs away because the moment he feels your warmth radiate over his skin, he'll know that it was real — that he'd lose you many years before he expected to — and xiao refuses to accept that. he couldn't. it feels too much of a crime to add to his already long list.

"hey now... don't go avoiding speech when you just threatened me to say something..."

something foreign stirs in him. it's hot and suffocating and if that wasn't enough to say that it wasn't a good sign then nothing else would be. he's never been good with anything foreign, having been stuck in liyue for as long as he could remember and so when he feels that strange feeling bubble up — when he feels his chest close up and when he feels abnormally sharp claws carve at his heart, he schools his face to something colder, sinister even. he wanted to scream, claw his eyes out so the tears wouldn't fall but he can't do that. yakshas who knew death's caress as their first touch don't do that.

"unbelievable. you came all the way from the harbor to tell me this?"

"i— what?"

his grip grew taut and you notice. concerned eyes flitted from his eyes to his fists, convinced that he would've injured himself if it weren't for his gloves, "mortal life is fickle and death consumes your kind every day. there was no reason for you to tell me about such a common occurrence. if that is all, i'll be taking my leave. do not call for measly matters."

you watched as he teleported away, leaving you alone in the islet. not even the cicadas were around to accompany you tonight. it was just silence and unbearable cold.

you should've been mad at him for disregarding your life just like that. how cruel was it to say that you're overreacting when you were just a few hours away from certain doom? being mad was your right. no one would've judged you for it but how could you be mad?

he was crying.

you don't think you could bear to witness the sight one more time and so you left back to liyue harbor where it was easier to pretend that the voices in your head didn't exist.

CHRYSANTHEMUMS ARE BEAUTIFUL — and they would make for wonderful funeral flowers, you mused to yourself as you patiently eyed the vase that decorated director hu's office. she was out with zhongli doing god knows what but the undertaker in front was kind enough to let you wait inside. you'd rather not deal with the gossip that was sure to come. if someone were to catch you idling around in front of a funeral parlor, well, they'd surely jump to conclusions — correct conclusions.

"oho? ohoho? well, look who's visiting, mr. zhongli!"

"ah... yes... this is certainly a surprise but not quite unwelcomed. may i ask what brings you here?"

you laughed as hu tao came over to give you a hug, her cheeks smooshing against yours as she playfully cuddled into your seated form, "i came to inquire if that discount is still up for grabs?"

"hm? did you murder someone or something?"

"director hu," zhongli sighs as he offers you a cup of tea that was, thankfully, made already, "i hardly think that is an appropriate question to ask."

"no, it's fine. it's not a question i can't answer because i'm still perfectly innocent," you paused, "as far as i know?"

hu tao pulled away. with her seated in her chair properly, the scent of plum blossom that clung to her was gone and you could once again smell the incense that wrapped the entire building, "if not for some poor guy that you beat up, then for whom are you asking?"

"about that... aha, it's for me," your eyes meet zhongli's, and... who were you kidding, of course, he knew. the sad smile he sent you was comforting. it's nice to know that even after you pass, a god would still remember your name.

without letting hu tao ask, you recounted the interaction between you and the nuns of the church of favonius as well as your brief meeting with baizhu. aether had insisted that you get a second opinion and you didn't see the point when that night, you fainted out of the sheer pain that pierced through your chest once again. if there was truly hope left for you, then at least one of the potions albedo gave you would've quelled the pain, even if it was a measly bit.

"i see... i'm sorry to hear that. unfortunately, there is nothing that we can offer to suspend your fate but at the very least, we can give you a send-off to be remembered."

it's so strange to see her suddenly don a professional tone but you should've known better than to doubt her. despite her unusualness, hu tao was someone who's incredibly passionate about her job. you didn't need to know about funerary ethos to see that, "i was hoping i could leave the arrangements to you? i'm not really picky and i don't really have much time to ponder about the details. anything's fine as long as it's for close friends only uh... that is if they want to come..."

"i see... that can be settled. anything else?"

"i'd like chrysanthemums to be used and... um... is it possible to hold the rites without my body?"

"it could be done but... why?"

you shrugged casually. this was surprisingly an easy conversation though... you are talking to hu tao who has an unconventional but good perspective on life and death, "i don't think i'll be able to return to liyue from inazuma."

hu tao nods understandingly before proceeding to explain the things that were going to be done during the funeral itself. you wonder why she's telling you all of this when it wouldn't matter to you. still, you listen. this was important to her and it's... oddly heartwarming to see her determination as she worked.

"on behalf of everyone in wangsheng funeral parlor, no, everyone you've ever encountered, we are sorry to see you go. thank you for everything that you've done for us and we hope that you live the rest of your days to the fullest."

hu tao bows deeply in respect and zhongli follows suit, leaving you in an awkward position. you wanted to say that it wasn't necessary but maybe this was some cultural tradition that you didn't want to overlook. hesitantly, you bowed back out of respect before muttering that you had a ship to catch which, wasn't too far from the truth.

"please... allow me to walk you out."

zhongli sends you a polite smile, eyes seemingly hinting for you to accept and that was enough for you to indulge in curiosity. giving one last wave to hu tao, you step out of her office and into the well-maintained hallways of the establishment.

"forgive me if this is too intrusive to ask but... have you told anyone else?"

you huffed in amusement, "he knows if that's your true question."

"did you tell him yesterday?"

surprised, you only nodded as zhongli sighed with a soft shake of his head, "no wonder..."

"what do you mean by that?"

laying a hand on the small of your back, zhongli guided you away from a rushing passerby. liyue's streets are always busy. you don't think it'll ever stop for anyone, "miss goldet approached us in distress earlier. it was what director hu and i sorted when you first arrived."

"verr goldet? did something happen?"

"quite. a big chunk of dihua marsh was... damaged last night as the miasma seemed to mysteriously grow rampant."

you froze. xiao... "is he alright?"

"it's hard to be 'alright' when encountering such news..." he bitterly smiled, "loss is a battle constantly fought by those who have lived and will continue to live for many millennia. the more losses you have suffered, the less you know how to accept fate."

worry began etching itself on your features. this was far from what you expected to happen when you told xiao. if anything, it was him whom you expected to take the news the best as he had grown used to speaking words that portray him and death as close acquaintances. you were foolish to think that, in retrospect, and you wonder if you had made a mistake. as if sensing your thoughts, zhongli halts and briefly holds your hand as a signal.

"there is no outrunning the invitation of death however when you are told of this fact before you pass and you choose to silently take it to your grave, it is the living that must suffer the consequences of your action. mourning will never not cause pain but when you weren't told anything and weren’t given any time to anticipate loss, things that hurt, hurt more. "

zhongli pats your shoulder sympathetically, "that young adeptus has suffered a perilous life. it does not come as a surprise that he has run away from that which threatens to bring him pain once more. perhaps you would say that he should be used to such unexpected events after all that has transpired in the many wars he had witnessed but, dearest child, has he ever adored anyone as much as he adored you?"

"he hasn't... but he will," you cleared your throat, looking into the direction of yujing terrace, "he'll find someone who adores him just as much and he'll learn to return the favor."

the former archon chuckles as he follows your gaze, "do you say that to remove the guilt from your heart or do you say that because that is your wish for him? the words you speak now are words you could speak because he has spared you the sight of his anger and what is anger if not the part of him that loves you?"

"xiao cannot be judged by the same measure you use amongst your kind for he, himself, has suffered far too many grievances that none of you can comprehend. does it come as a shock when you see that anger is the only emotion he speaks?"

"anger... is the only emotion he speaks?"

"his affection has turned into an anger for his being that deserves none of your tenderness. his compassion has turned into an anger that drives him to continue to swear by his contract with rex lapis. now, his sorrow has manifested into an anger that screams for you whom he believed deserved a fate much kinder than what was bestowed. mayhaps not with him but xiao has only ever prayed for your safety and happiness. see him now and you'll see his resentment for the world that dared treat you with anything but kindness."

"is that why you're here?" you smile listlessly, "because you cannot fault him for his anger?"

zhongli shakes his head, mirroring your words from earlier, "is that your true question?"

"would you answer me if i told you it wasn't?"

"very clever," he chuckles with eyes misting over with subtle pride, "but if you must know... i simply think that one shouldn't miss such an opportunity. there is no greater pain than saying your farewells once the moment has passed when you had the chance to offer it in the moment it truly mattered.

"ah, i didn't realize we've walked this far. this is as far as i will go. please consider my words kindly and though it may mean very little now," zhongli lays a hand over your head as he tips his head slightly, "you have my blessing. may you go forth in prosperity.

"and he says he has placed his past behind..." you whisper to yourself as you make your way back to dihua marsh.

"you there! may i interest you with our selection of flowers?"

you blinked, "flowers?"

ONCE PERCHED AS A CROWN OF HOPEFUL DREAMS — nervously nibbling on your lip, you paced back and forth as you held your occupied hands in front of you. maybe this was a mistake and maybe zhongli was wrong to say that you should still venture to mutter your farewell when xiao has strictly told you to only call him if it's for urgent concerns.

ah, but is your passing not an urgent concern?

gulping, you looked at the bright blue sky above you. beidou wouldn't take it too kindly if you delay her any further when you were one of the people who pestered her to speed up the preparations for sailing. besides, if you didn't speak now, you wouldn't be able to speak to him ever again. with that in mind, you hugged the white chrysanthemums close to your chest.

"xiao," a soft gust of wind blows past your form and slowly, you opened your eyes to meet dull, amber ones.

"you called?"

"i did."

an awkward silence fills the small space in between you two and before he could utter something about leaving (you knew him and you recognize the downward curve of his lips), you spoke.

"i'm leaving for inazuma in a few hours and... i don't want last night to be our last conversation. i don't want you to hate yourself for telling me such words and i don't want to hate myself for keeping my silence. i think that... we both have too little time for that."

"...you're leaving?"

"i made a few friends in inazuma and while we spent the shortest time together, i figured i still owe them a goodbye," you walked towards the same tree you were leaning on before and sat under its shade, "sit with me?"

xiao hesitates before taking the spot beside you, leaving enough space so that you wouldn't be touching each other.

"...fair enough. um... i don't even know what i want to say but... i want you to listen. you can leave anytime you want. i won't hold it against you. you don't need to reply either. i just need you to hear me out or y'know... try to, at least."

taking his silence as his agreement, you looked down at your lap. you don't think you could meet his gaze. his eyes are too honest and his honesty was painful. too painful even for you who'll only need to bear it for a few more days, "uh so... i'm— fuck, okay."

"i'm sorry."

you pause in surprise, abruptly looking at him to see xiao's gaze turned to someplace far away, "what?"

"i'm sorry for running away and i'm sorry for not being able to protect you."

"you couldn't have done anything."

xiao scoffs, tracing over his mask bitterly, "isn't that the point? ...my feelings for you are difficult but i had sworn to you that i would protect you from whatever dares to lay you in harm's way. i didn't fail. i've come to your aid before anyone could even do so much as give you a scratch. i thought... that if i watched over liyue well enough, you'd at least live a prosperous life. i never dared ask for more. that much is enough."

"xiao..."

"but despite my efforts, death has no mercy and it sent a curse that i could never face. is this... a product of my karma? was the world's grudge so severe that it has to take the one person i swore to protect no matter what the cost?"

"this is not your fault! it's no one's so..." your indignant stance falters as he sends you a glare.

"do you think i'm so foolish that i don't know that? i do," he clenches his teeth, "but it doesn't change the fact that you're dying and i can't do anything. somehow, that makes me feel at fault no matter how absurd it sounds."

you slump further into the soil as he continues. in a similar absurd manner, it makes you feel sorry that you're dying, "you are... the only person who tried to understand me and succeeded and you'll be the only person to ever make me wonder about life's pleasures. i will remember you until my own demise comes and if sinners can receive the blessing of reincarnation too, then i shall remember you in mine as well."

for a while, you didn't respond and when you finally regained your bearings, you laugh lightheartedly, "and to think i came all the way here to ask you to let me go... i forgot how stubborn you can be."

"calling the adepti stubborn? hmph. you have some nerve."

"i still think it's better if you forget about me. it'll make you suffer less. make it hard to remember that i can't offer my comfort even if i want to with all my soul."

xiao raises a brow, a sigh escaping his lips as he sent you another half-hearted glare, "you might have forgotten so i shall remind you. though i am an adeptus, i could not care less about granting human wishes."

"and you don't ever have to worry about that," you scrunch your nose as you pinched his cheek much to his flustered surprise, "most people would rather live the rest of their lives in misery than bear through your agonizing glare."

"let me go—"

"you didn't let me finish."

"what now?" he mutters as he successfully pried himself off your grip.

"i won't tell you how to live your life. if you want to hold on to me until the next time we meet, fine by me. i'll rush to you as soon as i see you enter the pearly gates or something. if you want to remember my face until the very end of your years, then i'll remember your name for just as long but xiao... i also want you to be happy. i want to look down from up there and say 'ah, he's smiling... i'm glad.' i want you to try to live because if your adoration for me hasn't changed when we meet again, i'd want to be able to tell you that you carried me so well in your heart that it almost felt like i was still alive too. those simple wishes are the only things i'll ask from you because... hah, for the longest time that was my dream. i hoped to make you smile more myself but i don't think i'll be able to do that now... am i selfish for asking this?"

"you wish me happiness?"

taking his surprise as an opportunity, you laid the tightly knit carnations on his head, "why wouldn't i? you're the one this world owes it to the most."

"and this is?"

"a flower crown! i've always wanted to learn how to make one and that kind merchant in liyue taught me just in time. i'm offering the first and last one i'll ever make to you. i know you just said that you don't grant wishes but... is it bad for me to hope that i'm special enough to be spoiled by you?"

"such mortal accessories... do not suit me."

you rolled your eyes, "says who? you? invalid. i refuse to accept it. y'know... when you're not too busy glowering, you have really soft features that match such soft flowers."

xiao's eyes widened almost imperceptibly. thankfully, you knew him well enough to notice such minor changes. smirking in delight, you lean further into him as you watch a red hue slowly stain his skin, "oh? do compliments fluster you? my, my—"

"if you still want to go to inazuma in one piece, i'd shut up now."

"shutting up~"

chrysanthemums carry the weight of a million words. to some, they are a symbol of life and rebirth. to others, it's a symbol of devoted love and loyalty. to the less fortunate, they are tokens of grief — a beautiful message that honors the full life of the dead. chrysanthemums mean everything and anything but as you inched closer to xiao, no longer needing the respectable boundary between your two hurt souls, chrysanthemums could only mean the memory of someone to be cherished even beyond what this life could offer.

it's a shame that you must limit your shared joys to optimistic wishes but it'll do. even if the afterlife didn't exist, your equal adoration for him would continue to persist even after your body perishes. it was a promise. one you sealed with the crown he hesitantly wore.

“don’t tie down your happiness to me, xiao,” you lean on his shoulder, smiling softly when he didn’t pull away, “you deserve more than that kind of joy.”

╰ taglist

@dourpeep @justsidecharacterthings @nightfloweruponahill @chichikoi @genshiningg @bloopsimpsforxiao @midnightraindropme @infinite-cats @horangheyy @zephestia @diaflower @justlynna

© 2021 𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐗𝐗. all rights reserved. do not copy, claim, repost or translate in any platforms but reblogs are appreciated.

haitani rkgk

yours truly,

yours truly, (part one). / sincerely, (part two).

premise: as a friend of the most attractive students in school, you're more than used to acting as the middleman between them and the people vying for their affection, often tasked with delivering presents or handing out their love letters. however, when you chance upon a small bouquet of flowers on your desk without a note indicating the sender or who you're meant to give it to, you start to wonder if this one's supposed to be yours.

includes: childe, xiao, diluc, kazuha, albedo, thoma & gorou !

a/n: hahaha why is this so long... anyways this is a college au + reverse harem of some sorts. enjoy. i really don't want this one to flop so likes and reblogs are appreciated thx

“Do you think it's a prank?”

“Why is that the first thing that pops into your mind?” Keqing sighs as she fixes her makeup in front of a compact mirror, smacking her lips to spread the color evenly. “You're really cute, [Name]. why wouldn't someone like you by now?”

Your face burns at the offhand comment. “You're only saying that because we're friends.”

Ayaka giggles, twirling a lock of your hair with her finger. “Of course not. You're very adorable! If anything, it'd be more surprising if nobody likes you.”

“Who do you think it's from, though?” Ganyu quietly asks from beside you, observing the handful of carnations laying on your desk. Scanning the students currently present in the room, she thoughtfully adds, “maybe someone on the shyer side since they couldn't give it to you directly?”

“Or someone who did it to be romantic,” Kokomi suggests, scrutinizing the flowers with keen eyes. “That's quite nice of them.”

You hummed in contemplation, trying to figure out who placed it on your table. “Are you sure it's not a prank... or a mistake? You all sit beside me, so maybe they mistook my seat for yours-”

“You're the only one who faithfully sits there, [Name]. We don't even have assigned seats so most of us sits wherever,” Keqing clarifies, staring at you with a disapproving look. “Don't deny it. You know it's yours.”

“But I can't think of anyone who would like me!” you exclaim in defeat. “I am curious about who gave it, though... I should try to find out who it is...”

“More importantly...” Ganyu smiles at you, noticing the blush dusting your cheeks. “Who do you want it to be?”

childe:

in all honesty, he's your first guess.

not because you think he likes you or anything! he's just a huge flirt.

at the beginning of the school year, you hardly got along. you know he's a friendly guy, but it's in the way that... intimidated you. he's part of the “mood maker” clique, attracting attention wherever he goes, and you're not sure if you could handle his energy...

you preferred to stay away from the spotlight though that's a bit hypocritical considering you're friends with the prettiest group of girls in your year, and he relished in it. you didn't know if you could get along.

you didn't become friends until you were assigned partners for a project that meant a lot for your grade, and you vowed to yourself if you couldn't be close to him, you should at least be close enough to work together without trouble.

in the end, you surprisingly hit it off, childe easing the awkward air between you with jokes and random stories to tell about his weird friends. your friendship didn't end when the project did, and you continued to hang out outside of school. you're sure he didn't approach you to get closer to your friends, either; though you had some doubts at first, he was nothing alike with the jerks who tried to use you.

you're no stranger to the pranks he pulled, nor were you unaware of his flirty nature; he occasionally entertained the lot who fancied him when he attended drinking parties. so it made perfect sense if it was childe who gave those flowers, along with the gifts that followed after. it would just be him messing around again, right? oh, definitely! it wouldn't be the first time he spent his money in reckless abandon, bragging that he has the cash to spare for it.

but unexpectedly when you bring up the topic, his expression darkens, showing no sign of joking around. he looks a little shocked, too, to know someone was pursuing you.

“it's not from me,” he admits, gently taking your hand. “but it's true that i like you.”

xiao:

xiao is one of the people you deliver presents to lol

due to his intimidating disposition (and the endless amount of nasty rumors swirling about him, thanks to said intimidating disposition), hardly anybody would dare to approach him, daunted by the perpetual scowl etched on his face. he remains as eye candy, but an entity no one could reach.

you avoided him at first, too. his face is admirable, you can say that much, but you've become somewhat desensitized from having been surrounded by pretty faces 24/7 so you can't really say it's anything new... and yes, you are scared of him to a certain degree. you could never guess what he's thinking.

you weren't sure if he's as scary as people make him out to be though, since people tend to exaggerate gossip for the sake of shock value. he once defended a middle schooler from high school delinquents (through persuasion and not with fists), but the story somehow twisted into another tale entirely detailing how xiao had brutally wiped the floor with their faces and painted the concrete floor with blood...

but as intimidating as he might seem, you don't think he's that kind of character. if you overlook his piercing glare and sharp tongue, he's quite decent.

... you thought that way until you caught him tailing you on your way home.

he crept up behind you, maintaining a natural distance, but after numerous twists and turns in hopes of leading him away, he had yet to cease heading towards your direction. you wouldn't be so suspicious if you hadn't purposely gone in circles around town, leading back to where you came from — which meant he didn't have a particular destination in mind, and fully intended on being hot on your tail.

tired of having bated breath waiting for his next move, you gathered all your courage and confronted him directly, cornering him to the nearest wall to assert dominance. xiao seemed startled by your forwardness, and you took his moment of vulnerability as an opportunity to interrogate him.

unexpectedly, he sheepishly confesses, “i'm not a stalker, i got worried since you're going home this late. haven't you heard about the crime rate these days...”

from there on, you suppose you could say you understood him better. though he's snappy and stern, he's not that terrifying, even sweet at times. when you become proper friends (and you stop suspecting him as your stalker), he saves you a seat next to him, or brings you coffee that you like when he notices you're sleepy in class.

it wasn't long until everybody came to know you were friends and a girl finally — you guessed it — asked you to send a love letter to xiao in her stead.

when you gave it to xiao, he was unusually flustered, flushed pink to the tips of his ears. his expression falls flat once you tell him it's from someone else, badly containing the disappointment to show on his face.

nevertheless, you continue to be friends, and xiao has learned not to expect much from you.

he's the earliest to arrive in class, so you ask him if he'd seen the person who gave you flowers. with a cold, hard look, he says no.

he's acting kind of weird, isn't he...

diluc:

the barista in the coffee shop near your university that has to put up with so much bullshit flirting everyday.

he has to reject people in a roundabout way, and you know he hates it, but of course he has to provide great customer service if he still wants customers right... directly breaking their hearts would only make problems.

but he takes no shit from rude customers.

no, you weren't one of them. in fact, diluc quite liked you a bit. first of all, you don't have any romantic interest for the staff, you genuinely enjoy his drinks (he knows because your face is like an open book), and you mind your own business. he tolerates you enough that he can make small talk with you and it doesn't upset him in the slightest.

so it really ticked him off when some idiot was bothering you in the cafe, starting an argument over a trivial matter that shouldn't be fussed over.

in normal circumstances, diluc would've done the usual protocol — reason with the angry customer, offer free products, and let them leave the premises peacefully. but the moment he saw the man grab your shoulders and you winced in pain as a result, he didn't even have to think of what to do next.

cold coffee rained down on the ill-mannered man's head, evoking a surprised scream out of him. his fingers left your body in favor of patting away the sticky liquid from his clothes, and you stared blankly at the seething figure behind him.

“your order,” diluc announced, his voice tinted with rage. then he pretended to remember something, looking at the empty cup in his hand. “oh, i apologize. you ordered it hot, didn't you?” he forced a smile on his face. “would you like me to brew another one for you?”

the man erupted to a new screaming fit, but he was promptly dragged aside. diluc immediately questioned if you were hurt anywhere, his voice a total 180 from before and turning into a soft tone you nearly didn't recognize.

“that stunt you pulled...” you nervously said. “will you be okay...? won't you get, er, dismissed because of it?”

“...you don't know i own this place?”

“???”

in any case, you've become good friends ever since that incident. so when your secret admirer gives you your customized drink from diluc's shop (that even xiao doesn't know the recipe of!), you ask him if there's a customer who ordered your exact drink that morning.

strangely enough, he changes the subject.

“he only gave you coffee?” diluc wrinkles his nose. “he's not fit for you.”

he proceeds to shove you a plate of pancakes for breakfast and won't let you talk about that topic again.

kazuha:

the soft-spoken boy working part-time as a florist. as one would expect, his good-looking features attracted customers left and right, just like how a flower allures bees with its colorful petals and sweet nectar.

he studies in a different university from you, but it's relatively close by and you run into each other a lot. you could say you're pretty good friends; you exchanged contact information and text every other day, phone each other up to have a meal together whenever you're both free, and hang out over the weekend.

he stirred up some drama with you once. on a rainy day, he invited you to eat lunch together, but you've forgotten to take an umbrella before leaving for school so you told him you'd be a little late 'cause you had to run to the convenience store first. however, he told you not to worry about it and abruptly ended the call.

fast forward to the afternoon: the glass doors to leave the corridors had a few people lurking by, covering what was beyond. you cocked up an eyebrow in question, confused over what was all the fuss, but then you see that familiar pale hair streaked with bright red.

kazuha stood innocently by the school gates, a crimson umbrella in hand, and a small bouquet in the other. he checked his wristwatch every few minutes, seeming to be waiting for someone. he completely ignored the gawking stares pinned on his frame, busying himself by humming a quiet tune.

you hesitantly pushed open the doors, approaching him with wary steps. he immediately perked up once noticing you, beaming brightly to greet you with enthusiasm. he offered you the bouquet, telling you it's nothing more than a small gift the owner had let him craft for free (who mistakenly thought kazuha had a lover, since he was always on his phone texting someone).

you might have known the reasons behind the present, but nobody else did. and what general implications could gifting a bouquet of flowers have?

thus, the school's online forum exploded with questions, asking for the identity of the pretty boy standing by their university, and the lucky person he'd given flowers to.

needless to say it was hard to convince your friends that no, he isn't your boyfriend.

but that was another issue! the issue NOW is the other bouquet you received, much more recent in nature. after suspecting childe, your next thought was to ask kazuha if he had any buyers who purchased the same flowers you had.

his lips twitch for a moment, faintly looking displeased. but he flashes a flawless, award-winning customer service smile, covering his initial expression easily.

“no such customer ordered for those flowers that day. but i am curious about this matter... could you humor me and explain more in detail, by any chance?”

albedo:

the med student fawned over by students and teachers alike. he's simply brilliant, idolized by the entire student body. though he's mainly studying science, he's been praised for his art as well, his paintings hung in the art room proudly.

you're not very familiar with him, only knowing him through hearsay. you don't know what he looks like, so you've never confirmed for yourself if he's as beautiful everyone says he is.

he's well-known but you haven't heard anything bad about him, which is an impressive feat. his name is only ever mentioned in concert with endless compliments.

you meet him by chance in exam season. unsurprisingly, the library is filled to the brim, tables stacked high with books and each chair occupied by agitated students sipping energy drinks and coffee to stay functional. amidst all the chaos, one student remains radiant and carefree, leisurely flicking pages through his notes. he's situated by a corner table, unbothered by the mindless zombies despite having plenty of free seats beside him and everyone else is squished together like canned tuna.

and you, carrying binders, books and stationery, are visibly desperate for a place to rest. his eyes leave the words in his notes briefly, beckoning you to come closer. and you, still unaware of his identity, gladly plop on a chair and heave your heavy supplies atop the table. it shakes for a moment as it bears the new weight, rattling his items, and the zombies gape at you in question. ironically, the person you've been bothering is not offended at all.

you sneak glances at him when you need to freshen your eyes from studying, nauseated by the letters that never seem to come to an end no matter how many paragraphs you've read. you're at awe by his fair skin, not a single blemish in sight, and he doesn't even have dark circles under his eyes. truly mysterious. either he has a magical skincare routine or he's not human. if anything, you'd think he just came from a relaxing vacation, not in the middle of hell week.

you snap out of your trance, and you scold yourself for being bewitched. you have more pressing concerns, and so you grill more information into your brain, oblivious to the turquoise eyes that begin to stare at you.

the next encounter comes when exams are finally over, and you celebrate by buying the pricey food set in the cafeteria. the crunch of golden breading is rewarding for your taste buds and you shovel more food towards your mouth, minding your own business.

the seat next to you is pulled back, and you pause from chewing. it's that guy again, his refined beauty easy for you to recognize. he places his tray on the table, smiling amiably as he asks if it's fine with you should he sit there. you nod, but there's plenty of vacant tables around. it's also pretty weird that he sat next to you, not across...

well, strange as it is, that's how you befriend albedo. you've yet to learn why he came on so strong, almost aggressive. like he really wanted to talk to you. but whatever.

the more you learn about him, the more his image of “golden boy” withers away. picture of elegance? the standard of sophistication? sure. but this guy doesn't hesitate to do the weirdest shit sometimes.

he doesn't fear anything. he puts anything edible in his mouth. one school trip to the countryside taught you a few things. if he's offered fried bugs, he'll eat it. if he's given frog legs, he'll eat it. he doesn't care. he'll eat seemingly anything. because of this, you worry his admirers will put something strange in the food they give him, but that possibility doesn't cross his mind at all. (well. not that he eats it. he rejects gifts most of the time. exceptions are when they come from you.)

you're starting to think he really doesn't fear anything. when you start to scream in fright like a headless chicken while watching a horror movie, he calmly studies the anatomy of whatever horrifying creature is on screen, questioning their ability to walk when half of their body is split apart. why is he questioning horror movie logic. “ghosts are supposed to be transparent and can pass through walls, how come she can grab the main character's hair and drag him to the incinerator?” “albedo, please.” (he comforts you when you get scared, hiding your face in his shoulder as he wraps his arms around you. he softly whispers in your ear to tell you when the scary parts are over.)

he's also an overprotective older brother. for good reason, actually. his little sister, albeit cute and outwardly harmless, is an explosive child who likes to make trouble. if he takes his eyes off her for more than two minutes, she will undoubtedly set fire to his little garden.

she's the reason why he's so observant. he can tell you trimmed your hair because he's all too used to klee chopping off her own hair with craft scissors. he also notices when you feel a bit under the weather. klee is the type to hide her sickness so she could play outside, and albedo would often have to forcibly tuck her back to bed. you're no different. he will, quite literally, drag you to your house and make you rest.

but aside from being a pain in the ass, his observation skills can help you — surely albedo can make a few guesses for your secret admirer's identity?

albedo blinks at you, uncharacteristically silent. he purses his lips, and gives you a small smile. he asks a few unassuming questions, things like what traces your secret left behind, or if they'd sent a love letter and he'd check the penmanship to see if he found it familiar.

he's not the most eager to help, you know that, but you're still slightly disappointed when he says, “sorry, i can't help you with something like that. it'd be better if you figured it out yourself.”

thoma:

the cute neighbor living in the apartment next door. just like kazuha, he studies in a different university, but you run into each other a lot because... well. obviously.

you find him rather silly. he'd signed the lease not knowing pets weren't allowed in the premises, and tearfully waved taroumaru goodbye when he moved in. to cope, he started staying at the park near the apartment building, playing with the dogs there and getting hit on by their owners in the process, but let's not talk about that.

despite being a newcomer, he fit right in with the tenants. he made effort to learn everyone's names and chatted with them whenever presented a chance, thus winning their favor. it isn't a strange sight to see him with middle-aged ladies and looking at home, listening earnestly to their complaints about their husbands or rowdy children. (his hard work pays off when they give him their special recipes and inform him of supermarket deals lol)

he seems to get along well with old men too, invited to their drinking parties. except thoma isn't good at rejecting alcohol from older adults, so when you save him from such situation — pulling him away from the old men prying into his love life, because surely a good kid like him would have someone to love him dearly — he's become eternally grateful.

he's honestly too good for his own good.

exhibit a: thoma is prone to cooking too much food for one person to eat in one sitting, so he tends to invite you to eat his hotpot with him or bring you packaged food you can easily pop into a microwave. after your one act of goodwill, he's become strangely attached to you, pronouncing you best buds. he then admits he used to live with a larger group of people (hence his cooking habits), and he's thankful for your company. (you'd argue you're getting the better end of the deal, receiving free food like this)

exhibit b: he's always available to help you in your troubles. need a hand with heavy groceries? he's on his way! ran out of soy sauce? just wait a bit, he's gonna grab some from the cupboard! forgot your key inside your apartment? then stay at his place for the meantime before the locksmith comes! your shower isn't working well?... he promises he won't peek in the bathroom, so feel free to take a bath h a h a h a. need someone's opinion on what outfit to wear for a date? sure, he's- wait.

YOU'RE GOING ON A DATE?

his face twists weirdly as you showcase two different shirts, asking which one he likes better. you raise an eyebrow when he doesn't dare to utter a single word. “are they both bad?”

he blinks rapidly, then shakes his head laughing. he half-heartedly points to the shirt in your left hand, but you can tell he doesn't really think much of it. he excuses himself fairly quickly, saying he had chores to do, and scurried back to his own home.

(you were only going to a date with ayaka's older brother because she insisted you both needed a love life, but it's not like you actually feel anything for him.)

it doesn't end there. thoma acts weird sometimes. he's strangely cold when he sees you inviting kazuha to your apartment to hang out. he also stiffens when he spots xiao walking you home.

but by far, he acted the weirdest when your phone number called him, but when he answered, he heard a different voice respond.

it's childe, whom you went drinking with. he doesn't know where you live, and you're not nearly sober enough to return home on your own, and it's not like you'll agree to staying over childe's house. you also refuse telling him your address, so childe is left with no choices but to call for someone he knows.

he uses your fingerprint to unlock the password in your phone, heading straight for your contact list, and dialed thoma.

it doesn't take long for thoma to arrive where you are, panting after running for a while, and childe is almost impressed. thoma hoists you up and you obediently wrap your arms around him.

“sorry for the trouble. [name]'s dead drunk as you can see,” childe comments, chuckling to himself. thoma doesn't look amused and replies with, “it's no trouble at all. i'd be glad to help [name] anytime.”

then in a way that almost seems possessive, thoma leaves childe behind.

so now when you arrive home, bouquet in your arms, red dusting your features, thoma is displeased once more.

(yet he is envious of those who can freely profess their affections, because he's certain if he were to ever admit his feelings to you, things can never be the same.)

gorou:

you first suspected childe because you thought the bouquet of flowers was a joke, but if it wasn't and it was real with the intentions of sweeping you off your feet...

then you might have another suspect in mind.

gorou is... a funny guy. can you put it like that? you don't know what to think of him. he's nice, you already know that very well, kokomi's good friends with him and told you a few stories about him, all of which are sweet and amusing. your first impression of him was that of a pure-hearted boy that can do no wrong.

he's younger than you by a year, and kokomi was fairly excited when she first told you he would be attending the same university soon. she promised to introduce you to him in hopes you'd be friends as well.

and okay, you could get behind that. there's nothing wrong with meeting new people. gorou sounded like a great guy too, and it'd be nice to take care of someone younger. you've been coddled by your seniors the past year as a freshman, and you thought it would only be right if you did the same to the new batch of students.

so you attended the welcoming party kokomi dragged you into. it was just a small gathering to get the freshmen familiarize themselves with older students, and she told you you'd get to meet gorou there, her eyes carefully scanning the crowd in pursuit of a specific face.

just as you were reminiscing over the past where your sadistic seniors encouraged you to drink a lot in the last welcoming party, shuddering in fright, kokomi tapped your shoulder and gestured to the brown haired boy standing before you.

it must be him. per courtesy, your lips curled into a practiced smile, exuding an amicable air. kokomi briefly exchanged a few words with him, but it looked like she was doing all the talking, the male frozen in spot as if he'd seen something strange.

he stared at you blankly, eyes slightly widened, and you slowly became unnerved with his vacant gaze, your smile faltering. you made eye contact with kokomi, silently questioning her, but she gave a subtle shrug of her shoulders, also confused by his behavior.

then, completely out of everyone's expectations, he'd dropped to the floor.

gorou had knelt on the ground with one steady knee, solemn in his endeavors. in an instant, your hand was seized, fingers enclosed in his warm palm. his piercing stare was impassioned, sincere at its core. heat shot up to the tips of your ears.

“marry me!”

his voice resounded in the entire room, earning unwanted attention. the chatter halted immediately, all eyes dedicated to the spectacle that was the both of you, and your mind began to spin, cold sweat dripping down your forehead.

your voice was caught in your throat, not knowing what to say, and all you could formulate was a garbled string of incoherent mess. undeterred, the grasp on your hand was unrelenting, gorou committed through this act until the very end.

everyone was thinking the same thing: we haven't even started drinking yet, but this little guy is drunk already??

shameless. crazy. a head with loose screws. you're probably the only one who'd describe gorou that way.

but what kind of sane man would say that upon first meeting???

kokomi quickly tried to mediate the situation for him, pulling him away and patting his back to knock him out of his dazed stupor, and pushed you to the farthest corner.

she vouched for him when she saw your puzzled expression, thinking of him as a weirdo, and she insisted he's normally not that odd. she swears he was never interested in dating before, and she isn't sure what changed for him to... propose... all of a sudden... to you, who he'd barely seen for ten seconds, no less.

naturally, it feels strange for you to see him. after that disastrous encounter, gorou — who did feel embarrassment for what he did, horrified at his own impulsiveness — tried to make amends, backtracking steps (he skipped way too many and immediately went to propose lol) and treating you normally like a friend of a friend, slowly trying to make the atmosphere between you casual instead of a freezing blizzard that kills off the amicable mood.

in spite of all that, however, you do feel as if his feelings are actually genuine. he can be clumsy, and incredibly so, you don't know who else could propose to another person within a span of a minute meeting them for the first time, but he means well! you started off on the wrong foot, and maybe this bouquet of flowers is him trying to curry your favor... or something...

yet all he gives is a disbelieving look, and that's enough to provide a clear answer: it's not from him, and he's upset.

it,, probably wasn't a good idea to ask someone who likes you about another person who likes you.

but if it isn't him, who else could it be?!

drop your guesses in the comments but im pretty sure it's already obvious lol

Yeosang: Wooyoung and I have been friends for as long as I can remember and during difficult times thinking about our friendship gives me strength.

Yeosang: Because it reminds me that if I was able to survive all of the shit he made me put up with, I will be able to survive this too.

[10:00 PM] + assassins/gang!au + "i want to go home."

a/n: for the person that wanted "yeosangst" i love you hope you like this, based off the song bellyache, warnings for angst, death, and some descriptions of blood/violence, the narration switches between past and present tense, 6k

-

you've got a bellyache.

your stomach curls in on itself, a sharp pain that crawls up your limbs, creeps up to the crevice of your heart and stays there. heavy. it's heavy. suffocating.

a dull thud resounds over the dull hum of the car engine and you sit up straight.

you're just hungry, you decide. you're fine. it's fine. everything is fine. you're fine.

you take a breath. another. the dark house in front of you looms, like a parent, bent at the hips as they chastise you with narrowed eyes and a skeptical turn of the lips. you barely remember your parents after so many years of this. you barely remember a home like this. another -

"open the door." the familiar voice and the knock at the window makes you jump, hands over your heart, your steady breathing gone ragged.

"jesus fucking christ."

"no, just yeosang." kang yeosang rolls his eyes from beyond the drivers side window, his skin flushed pink from the cold and his scarf slipping past his nose, revealing his lips. his sharp features remain on you, though, narrowing especially when you still haven't moved. he knocks a knuckle against the window, "now open the fucking door, y/n."

and you do.

your fingers are trembling (when had they started doing that?), but you unlock the door. yeosang ducks into the driver's seat, tossing you the backpack without so much as a second glance. he is quick to back out of the driveway, and as you watch the dark house slip away the ache in your belly, your chest, returns.

it's a terrible fate, the consequences you two will face, whether that is by the hands of the law or by the hands of whatever supposedly awaits you both after death.

you met yeosang fresh out of college, struggling to pay off your loans and get past your first round of interviews. at the time, he was merely a friend of a friend. mingi's roommate's friend. you barely knew mingi, really, so yeosang was nothing more than an acquaintance.

until he found you with blood dripping from your hands.

he convinced you that night that the police would never believe it was self defense. he looked at you that night with clear eyes and a serious face, and you could tell he didn't believe you either. maybe that was the start of everything. maybe that explained how you both were now. yeosang had stared at you, unwavering, and pointed at the dead man at your feet as if he were discarded trash, and he said, "why would they believe you? look at his suit. his watch. his shoes. his fucking handkerchief."

you didn't know the brands, just that they looked like they were worth more than you could afford in a lifetime.

yeosang murmured, "now look at you."

and he was right. you'd always hated that - how rich people were favored, how you were judged for what you wore and how you looked - but he was right. you knew it just as much as he did.

you found out a lot about yeosang that night, sat on an old couch in an abandoned warehouse with his friends (more friends of your friends) discussing your fate as if you were not even there. wooyoung from your accounting classes and the only person willing to help you during group projects. choi san, your third year roommate's plug she occasionally hooked up with for free weed, who you believed to be absolutely harmless. kim hongjoong, your lab teaching assistant from your last year that you'd always argue your grades with. your friend who was barely a friend, mingi, and his roommate yunho who you met yeosang through. there were a few more familiar faces you may have seen at parties or at the bar.

you'd stared down the barrel of a gun that night, with your most annoying lab TA from college at the other end of it, and, looking back, you think that was when you'd lost your mind, right alongside that man you and yeosang left in the gutter.

"technically they did kill the target." mingi was the one that spoke up first. you'd been surprised - though you both were friends, he only ever reached out to you for parties or to go out to bars.

hongjoong had turned his hard stare from you to mingi, asked, "yes, but it was messy. they've only caused us more problems. if we accept them, are you going to take responsibility?"

mingi shook his head. you couldn't even be bothered to feel disappointment.

"thought so." hongjoong said, turning to you with a lopsided grin. you wondered, briefly, if he'd wanted to do this to you every time you visited office hours and pointed out mistakes in his test questions. it was certainly the same smile he'd give you back then.

"i will."

yeosang said it so casually, so easily. you looked up at him, the dried blood making your hands feel tight as you fisted the hem of your shirt.

"will you now?" hongjoong tilted his head, and the dangerous glimmer in his eye stuck with you even to this day.

wooyoung frowned at yeosang, "why would you do that?"

"they have potential. no matter how you look at it, the target should have overpowered them, yet they managed to kill him in one blow. we can use that."

you remembered it all to be so clinical. the way they all nodded, the way they looked over you. you almost couldn't believe they were the same people you'd interacted with so casually over the years.

when hongjoong dropped the gun and nodded, you'd realized you had no choice in the matter.

he still asked, "so what do you say, y/n. want to clean up the mess you made?"

it was either death or joining them. the gun glinted in his hand, a mocking thing.

so you'd joined them.

and yeosang held it over your head from the moment you said okay.

~.~.~.~.~

"it's done?" you ask, now, watching as he rolls to a stop at red light.

"you think i'd be here if it wasn't?"

"i don't know. you've done it before."

yeosang finally looks at you, fingers tight around the wheel. "what's got you so worked up?"

you shrug. and he leaves it at that. he was never a man of words. that was more wooyoung's thing.

~.~.~.~.~

responsibility meant vouching for you at training and training meant pushing you to brink of death on so many occasions, you'd lost count. the trainees were separated from the main gang, in a warehouse at the edge of town that hongjoong only visited once a year and yeosang apparently never visited until you were brought in. even then, you only saw him once a month. the facility was run by a stoic man with debilitating punches. jongho. he woke you all up at the crack of dawn and worked you until dusk. then there were chores, most of which you were made to do because you were the newest trainee.

mingi had been kind enough to explain it to you, three weeks into your indoctrination as he stood leaning against the bathroom door, watching you attempt to staunch your bleeding nose, flinching at the pain. you'd snapped at jongho earlier and he made you spar him as punishment. the broken nose could be healed, but the broken ego could not be.

"yunho is coming," he said.

"then why are you here? shouldn't yeosang be here? since he's responsible for me?"

you'd spit out the word responsible with all the vehemence you could manage.

mingi snorted and it reminded you of the few times you both were getting air during a party. those conversations were insignificant at the time, but they made you wonder if you and mingi could have been better friends in another life.

"yeosang doesn't want to show favoritism. neither of us do."

"trust me," you'd said, "no one thinks he favors me. or any of you favor me for that matter. jongho just rocked the shit out of me in front of everyone an hour ago."

"it's apart of the job."

"kindness isn't?" you'd frowned at mingi.

"no," mingi shook his head, stepping back out of the bathroom, "it never will be."

and yeosang proved that during every monthly visit. he rolled up the cuffs of his dress shirt and gestured to the ring, fists at the ready.

he spoke quiet instructions at you. fix your stance, hands up, too heavy on the heels, and when his visit was over, he'd just toss you a water bottle, wave, and disappear.

sometimes, he'd knock you over the head long enough that you saw stars. he'd sit with you after those days, with ice.

many many months in, you'd gotten the guts to speak up on one of those days. with black dots in your vision and a possible bruised rib, you sat and asked, "why me?"

you didn't expect yeosang to answer.

but after a long moment, he said, "i don't know. maybe i see something in you i want to protect."

"what could that possibly be?"

he shrugged.

you'd spoken into the silence, "maybe you just felt guilty."

yeosang blinked at you for a long moment before he rolled his eyes and said, "maybe i like to have people indebted to me. it makes it easier when i need to call in favors."

"that's weird," you'd said, "and manipulative."

yeosang tossed your hand wraps into your lap, "i think you're ready to keep going."

"i think i have a concussion."

"too bad. get up."

and you did.

two years later and you stood amongst of a pile of groaning bodies, barely able to stay standing, and you looked hongjoong in the eyes and declared, "i won."

hongjoong looked you dead in the eyes, his dark eyes filled with a dreadful sort of amusement, and he did not bother to answer you, looking instead over his shoulder at yeosang. he raised a brow and waved a hand.

yeosang spoke, voice quiet and musical, casual as always, "kill the last man you hit."

he tossed you a knife, the one he always keeps strapped to his thigh.

you met his unwavering gaze, your belly aching. yeosang looked very much like an angel, even as he ordered you to kill. it makes sense. they were assassins, made to do the bidding of whoever hongjoong decides. training isn't over until you kill. on purpose.

so, you did, turning on the other trainee, a boy you'd spent day after day alongside, who you laughed with during dinners and you watched the terror in his eyes grow with each step you took and you cleaned the dishes with him and sparred with him and he shook his head, small pleading whimper left his lips and on his birthday you got together with the other trainees and bought a small cake and champagne and -

hongjoong laughed, "now you've won, y/n."

~.~.~.~.~

the hotel is quiet, likely empty. yeosang tosses the burner phone on the table, beside the backpack. you watch from your position sprawled out on the hotel bed. he glances over at you, wrinkling his nose.

"at least take off your shoes."

you roll your eyes before you kick your shoes off in his direction. one of them hits him in the shin. he glares at you before he slips into the bathroom. he doesn't slam the door shut behind him, though, so you know he's not really mad.

~.~.~.~.~

"you couldn't have warned me?"

you'd pulled yeosang out of the bar when you'd finally found him, after bowing your head at a million and one people congratulating you for your ascent into official ranks. he was standing beside san and wooyoung and you'd promptly grabbed his elbow and dragged him away, earning a snort from wooyoung and giggle from san. hongjoong shook his head at you in warning, but you ignored him. the consequences for that might bite you in the ass later, but you'd only been able to focus on yeosang.

yeosang had stared down at you with an insolent brow raise and it made you want to punch him.

"that would have made it unfair."

"i had to kill someone."

"you've already killed someone."

"i - that was different."

"is it really?" yeosang tilted his head and you deflated under his gaze, letting the brick wall behind you carry your weight as he said, "murder is murder, y/n."

"intentions matter."

"no, they don't."

"yes, they do. the first time was an accident!" you couldn't help the way you shouted at him, your voice echoing in the ensuing silence around you.

"i didn't want to be here. i didn't want this," you couldn't help the tears in your eyes. you hadn't been allowed to be upset about your circumstances since that fateful night. this was the one person you never wanted to show your vulnerability to, but you know, he's the only one you should be showing it to. he's responsible for you. no one else here was.

"then why did you listen to me? why did you kill him yesterday?"

"i - i don't know."

"it's because you wanted to live," yeosang pressed a hand to your shoulder, featherlight, barely there, "that's the same reason why you killed the first time. that's how you should operate here. everything you do, from here on out, is for survival. it should have been this whole time, but now it's your number one priority."

"that's not -"

"you owe me that much, y/n. from the moment you agreed to hongjoong's request, you've become my responsibility. your survival is my survival."

you'd blinked at him, frowning, and said, "it almost sounds like you care."

yeosang had scoffed, his hand on your shoulder suddenly much heavier, his eyes narrowed, clearly unappreciative of your comment, "one way or another, i always collect my debts, y/n."

you'd shrugged him off, but he wasn't lying. when yeosang did speak, his words were meant to be heard.

~.~.~.~.~

"what did joong say?"

yeosang ignores you, opting to towel dry his hair. he tosses the wet towel on the hotel couch. you wrinkle nose at his actions. he plops down on the bed opposite yours.

"he said, 'good job'," yeosang says, staring at you with his unwavering eyes and a small, pretty smile on his face.

you don't respond, nodding as you turn to stare at the popcorn ceiling above you.

~.~.~.~.~

the only time you've heard hongjoong praise any of you was when he praised one of your fellow trainees for his wonderful work before he turned the gun he'd had pointed on the dying target on your colleague and lay his brains out all over the floor right in front of you.

"what did he do wrong?" hongjoong asked, turning on you. the glint in his eyes told you he didn't expect to hear the right answer from you, and the gun in his hands already found the point between your eyes.

you'd tried to swallow the lump in your throat, "i -"

"he let the kid and wife go," yeosang interrupted from behind you.

hongjoong scoffed, dropping the gun, "of course you won't let me have my fun."

"new recruits aren't endless, joong, one dead is enough tonight," seonghwa said, shaking his head at the mess before him as he shouldered past you, "i'll go find the kid and wife."

and you stayed quiet, even as wooyoung took a look at the bullet wound in your thigh, even as yeosang held out a hand for you to hold while wooyoung pulled the bullet from your wound and stitched you up. you stayed quiet until only you and yeosang sat alone in his car in front of your apartment building, the heater and light hum of the engine the only sounds between you.

"do you need help going in?"

you'd nodded.

yeosang tucked his hand around your waist and allowed you to lean your weight on him, half carrying you to the door. the ride up was quiet, and he'd punched in your apartment code without hesitation. he barely visited, so you were unsure if he'd remember it. he helped you into bed, placed a water glass at your nightstand along with painkillers, and finally you broke the silence.

"if i fuck up, will hongjoong kill you? is that what you meant when you said my survival is your survival?"

yeosang stood over you, his dark hair falling into his eyes. your bedside lamp illuminated his delicate features, and somehow he looked less dangerous, kind even.

yeosang met your gaze before looking away, gaze flicking over the wall art adorning your walls. "he didn't like the way i undermined him that night."

"by taking responsibility for me?"

yeosang nodded, "he didn't like that you don't listen to him."

"i listen to him."

"the night you passed the exam? at the bar?"

"can he blame me for wanting to yell at you?" you'd sighed, "i didn't think he was that offended. maybe he just doesn't like me. i did spend an awful lot of time undermining him in class."

"he mentioned that too."

"that isn't fair."

yeosang shrugged, "it isn't supposed to be fair."

you'd watched as he flicked the bedside lamp off.

"he'd kill you because of me?"

"he loves his punishments," yeosang said, melodic voice soft as the pillow under your head. he crouched beside your bed, until he was at eye level with you. "nobody ever survives his punishments in one piece."

"sorry," you said, unable to help the sarcasm. "i would have been nicer in class if i'd known i'd be in this situation."

yeosang let out a soft laugh, an admittedly pretty, calming sound.

"maybe next time."

this time you'd laughed and yeosang just pat your leg before slipping out your room.

~.~.~.~.~

"want to talk about what had you so worked up?"

the hotel room isn't dark enough for you to sleep properly. the curtains are thin and the bustling city below never sleeps, so the lights streak through the room.

yeosang never speaks at night, even when he knows you're awake. you're supposed to be the annoying one. your stomach churns, the remnants of the bellyache, but you ignore it. you blame it on having a small dinner.

"it's nothing. i'm fine."

yeosang should drop it. he usually does.

but you hear his bed creaking and rustling, then you feel a weight on your bed. you pull your head out from under the covers, blinking at him. he's wrapped in his blanket, his dark hair messy, and he's looking at you with a determined expression. he raises a brow. your heart skips a beat, especially when he gives you a gentle smile, the kind he usually bestows on you when you're both alone, the kind he gives wooyoung often.

"not moving from here until you talk."

you glare.

he just plops down beside you, his arm warm against yours, even with the blankets between you.

you crane your neck to look sideways at him. you find him staring at you, a soft look in his dark eyes.

you breathe, "why hasn't hongjoong punished me yet?"

~.~.~.~.~

"what the fuck did you do?"

seonghwa's voice was sharp and it cut through like a knife.

"he was going to kill yeosang."

"so you think you can kill him?" seonghwa shouted, "we needed him back alive."

"i know, but i -"

"y/n, shut up," wooyoung said, stepping between you and seonghwa's seething form. "check on yeosang. seonghwa, we need to damage control."

"that was -" yeosang gasped, clutching his stomach, "that was fucking stupid."

"and you're bleeding out."

"yunho can fix it."

"let me see -"

"i said yunho will fix it."

you'd froze, eyes on yeosang, and his angry expression, the clench of his jaw, and you'd stepped back.

"fine." you'd said.

"go home, y/n."

and you sat on yeosang's couch in his empty apartment and tried to understand how home translated to yeosang's apartment in your head.

you came over often, if not to meet up with him before jobs, then to bang pots and pans and doors until he woke up and bought you breakfast. you'd memorized his code and he threatened to change it but never did.

you had a home, an apartment of your own, but it wasn't this. it wasn't here. you never accidentally fell asleep on your couch in your apartment. you could barely sleep when you were there, body always on high alert. maybe that's the side effect of being an assassin, knowing damn well someone could slip in while you're sleeping and slit your throat.

you woke up to a series of beeps.

wooyoung met your eyes first, with yeosang on his back, dragging him down. san was behind him, keeping yeosang from sliding off wooyoung's back. wooyoung bit his lip, his eyes full of something akin to pity as he looked at you.

"what is it?" san called.

yeosang looked up, met your gaze, and held it as he asked, "i thought i told you to go home."

"i - i'm - sorry."

"you never fucking listen, do you?" yeosang's voice was sharp, angry, loud. he'd never raised his voice at you, no matter how annoyed he got with you.

you watched as he stepped closer, his eyes unwavering. wooyoung hovered, attempting to steady yeosang, but yeosang just pushed his arm off. san merely stood at the doorway, watching, eyes wide.

"i told you to stand the fuck back, y/n. why don't you listen?"

he shouted the last word and you stared. wooyoung stepped up, said, "yeosang, don't."

"this is not your home, y/n. so leave."

his words weren't even untrue, but it hit a nerve you could never have explained until years later. it hit that lonely part of you, the part of you that forgot you should not have made a home somewhere without permission first. because, he's right, this is not your home, no matter how much it felt like it.

"i saved your life." you snapped, ignoring the urge to cry, fingers curled into fists at your side.

"i didn't ask you to."

"i didn't ask you to either, yet you fucking did it anyway." you stepped closer, until your face was inches from his, and watched him glance over your face. you pressed a finger to his chest, "but what i want doesn't matter right?"

"no," yeosang bit out, "it never mattered."

and you shoved past him, past wooyoung calling your name. san let you through the front door, only to follow after you.

you'd stomped through the building and all the way to your car. you fumbled with your keys through the tears in your eyes and only when san grabbed the keys from your hands and opened the door for you did you realize you were crying. san sighed, shutting the door behind you, before he slipped into the passenger's side.

that night, he said, "yeosang didn't mean any of it. he's just scared."

"of what?"

"what hongjoong will do to you."

you'd barely even thought of that, of the consequences to your impulsive actions.

"he shouldn't take it out on me. he shouldn't - he shouldn't tell me to leave like that."

"i'm sure wooyoung's yelling at him about that right this instant."

you'd let out a small laugh and san squeezed your hand and you pretended, for a moment, that you were living a normal life.

please come home, y/n.

the text from yeosang lit up your phone screen. san snickered as he read it over your shoulder, dodging your attempt to shove him into the door.

~.~.~.~.~

"is that all you're worried about?"

"isn't that serious?"

yeosang shrugs, his arm moving against yours. "it's not serious enough for you to lose sleep over."

you flip over onto your side, so you're facing yeosang full on. he startles, coughing loudly to hide the way he chokes on his own spit.

"i want to go home, yeosang," you say, resting your head on the side of your arm. "how long do we need to stay out here?"

yeosang looks sideways at you before he turns his gaze to the ceiling. "we need to drop off the backpack to the rendezvous and then we can head home."

you nod.

he says, "is there anything you want to do? before we head home?"

you study his expression, especially when he turns to face you, copying your position.

"maybe visit the ocean?"

"okay," he nods, "let's do that."

"seonghwa hates when any of takes detours, though."

"he won't mind."

you raise a brow at him, skeptical. yeosang just rolls his eyes and presses his hand to your cheek, pinching lightly, "stop questioning me."

"fine," you mumble.

he makes a move then, to get up, and that dreadful feeling at the pit of your stomach returns. you tug at his arm before he can slip away and you say, "can you sleep here?"

yeosang looks at you then as if you are asking the world of him, and maybe you are. you've always had lines between you two, lines the both of you spent every day toeing with the smallest of gestures.

you fully expect him to say no.

but he does not.

~.~.~.~.~

"we're headed home, joong."

hongjoong looked up from the documents he and seonghwa were pouring over. even mingi glanced their way at yeosang's words, brows furrowed.

"home?" hongjoong asked, a small lilt to his tone you couldn't quite place.

yeosang blinked, frozen to his spot for just the smallest of moments, before he said, "my apartment."

"both of you?"

hongjoong directed the question to both of you, but he only looked at you.

you spoke slowly, "we came in the same car, so i need to get dropped off at my place. i live close to yeosang though."

hongjoong only nodded, but the silence in the room seemed to be more heavy than usual.

"y/n."

you looked up at hongjoong, "yes?"

"how is the clean up work going?"

he'd assigned you grunt work as punishment for killing the target to save yeosang. it wasn't hard work, but it was tedious and disgusting and you'd come home extremely late to complete it. you thought he was letting you off easy, but you hadn't voiced it in fear that you would jinx it.

"it's going well."

"good," hongjoong said, though this time his eyes were on yeosang, "great work."

~.~.~.~.~

you wake up to yeosang packing your stuff, the spot next to you still warm.

you roll out of bed and yeosang presses your coat to your hands. you yawn at him, holding your arms out. he sighs, helping you into your coat without another word. he only rolls his eyes when you laugh.

the morning is colder than usual and you can see your breath. yeosang cranks up the heat. despite the cold, the sun shines bright, the last of the sunrise painting the clouds soft oranges and golds.

yeosang drives southbound, away from any rendezvous points you been told of.

the ocean, you remember.

you look over at yeosang, at the way the morning sun hits the planes of his face in ways you think someone could write lines and lines of poetry about. you expect content, but his brows are furrowed. there are bags under his eyes. you slept well beside yeosang, warm and content, and you realize he did not. his lips are downturned into a tight frown.

you can see the shoreline from all the way up here, even as yeosang turns into an empty road lines by tall, tall trees.

that dreadful bellyache returns, coupled by the tight ache in your chest you'd ignored all this time. you've been an assassin long enough to understand that something is wrong. maybe you would have realized something was wrong a long while ago if this wasn't yeosang.

"we're going to the ocean first?"

yeosang nods.

~.~.~.~.~

long ago, you used to dread training.

yeosang would say, in his calm, unwavering way, "get up."

then you'd raise your fists and go another round.

every time he knocked you down, he'd say so calmly, "get up."

"get up."

the pain would bloom all over and he would toss you a hard look and say, "get up. you should always get up and keep fighting."

the punch you landed on his pretty face and the accompanying crunch was utterly satisfying.

~.~.~.~.~

"i want to go home," you whisper, fingers pressed to your thighs, your eyes on his sharp profile.

"home?"

"to your apartment. to bed. you look tired."

"i asked you once what you considered home. is it really our apartment? do you trust me that much?"

our. it sits on your shoulders, a heavy burden and a relief all at once. your fingers tremble against your thigh. the trees loom over you, this time as onlookers, as witnesses to a moment that would be lost forever otherwise, now held onto by centuries old sentries who will whisper of this moment through the wind and birds and insects. perhaps even to the ocean you will not be able to see.

"i don't know anything else. i don't think that's a bad thing."

"i'm sorry," yeosang grips the steering wheel, even as the car comes to a rolling stop. the birds no longer sing. the sun does not shine as bright. it's a dreary morning really.

you had an inkling the moment you left the looming house of your target. the inkling only grew to certainty as you listened to yeosang tell you hongjoong believed you did a good job. years have passed since that night he killed a new recruit before you, and you've quickly learned that hongjoong only praises people before he kills them.

that's the thing. you expected hongjoong to appear with a gun and an amused smile. maybe even seonghwa.

you didn't even consider that it would be yeosang, but you should have known.

you'd asked him once if hongjoong would kill him because of you, and yeosang only said hongjoong would punish him.

you stare at the way yeosang grits his teeth, and you realize this is the punishment.

"you don't have to do it."

"joong took me in when i was starving. he saved my life. i have to do it."

"my survival is your survival," your voice shakes, "you said that to me yourself. does that not matter to you?"

"do you think," yeosang grips the steering wheel so tight, his knuckles turn white, "i'm going to survive this?"

you meet his glistening eyes, the furrow in his brow, the clench to his jaw, the way his hands tremble. you think of the way he slept beside you, his warmth, the way he shows you kindness, not in words, but in actions that you've always just thought was yeosang, and nothing else. at least you told yourself it was nothing, because feelings were not something you were allowed. they'd be used against you.

"oh."

"yeah." yeosang lets out a breathy, broken, bitter laugh, "hongjoong knows me like the back of his hand. he knows how i've felt about you since the first day and he used it to his advantage. he just didn't think you..."

"he didn't think i felt the same way until i killed the target for you."

yeosang takes a ragged breath and closes his eyes.

"until i admitted to san and wooyoung that you are my home."

yeosang opens his eyes, and the sadness there breaks your heart. he drops his hands from the steering wheel and presses the heels of his hands to his eyes.

"you shouldn't make homes out of people, y/n. especially not people like me."

"it's too late for that."

"i wish it wasn't."

"i know."

~.~.~.~.~

long ago, you were drunk out of your mind and trying to process your first real assignment. it was the excuse you told yourself the next morning when you woke up with a raging headache and the terrifying memories of the way your heart fluttered at yeosang's touch.

yeosang had pressed his hand to your chin, tilted your head back, and held your gaze. he murmured, "you're going to be the death of me."

you laughed, "i think it'll be the other way around with the way you kick my ass during training."

yeosang's thumb traced along your jaw, right beneath your lip, and he merely smiled. your heart pumped in your chest, even as he dropped his hand from your face.

he leaned close, murmured, "stop getting your ass kicked then."

you'd blinked after him, only to watch as looked over his shoulder and held out an arm for you to hold as he walked you back to his car.

you'd dared to slip your hand into his as he helped you out the car and back up the stairs. he did not brush you away, merely allowed you to entangle your fingers in his as he drew little circles along the back of your hand with his thumb.

~.~.~.~.~

yeosang takes a deep breath, "so that's it? you won't fight back?"

you shake your head. "i'm tired of fighting."

he presses a hand to your cheek, brushes at the tears there, and he says once more, "i'm sorry."

he takes out the gun, and holds jury amongst the trees as they bear witness to your long overdue last moments.

♡