Joaoarias - Llaqueadura

when I was nine

I begged God to cease my existence.

in that cold night

while I looked at the yellowish street lights

that came through my windows

I felt ignored by the Creator

tears streamed down my face

I passed out hoping to be a child again

or to be

nothing

I thought God hadn't listened to me

but now I realize he did

everyday I get smaller and weaker

pound by pound, I disappear

everyday my memories get blurred

as if I was an empty receptacle

of a soul that has never been beared

my lust was everything I had left

but it's slowly making its way out of my flesh

ripping my body, breaking my ribcage

trying to get away from the hell

I have became

virtues and sins are disgusted by what I am

I am becoming a cold shell that

kids throw back on the ground

when they can't hear the waves inside me

like the shell,

I am what's left from what once existed

my duty on earth is to disintegrate

so when I look at myself in the mirror,

perceive I'm slowing fading away

and my bones are popping out

I finally feel like I have accomplished

something

Night Landscapes.

Faust (1926)

The Color of Pomegranates, Sergei Parajanov, 1969

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet 1968 

Portrait of a Man by Egon Schiele, Metropolitan Museum of Art: Drawings and Prints

Bequest of Scofield Thayer, 1982 Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York, NY Medium: Drypoint

http://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/363672

Phil Elverum  photography

purchase Phil’s art book at: pwelverumandsun.com

Study of the disappointed souls or Weary of life, 1891, Ferdinand Hodler

Design for stained glass windows in Ditteridge Church by Edward William Godwin, Metropolitan Museum of Art: Drawings and Prints

Gift of Royal Institute of British Architects, 1963 Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York, NY Medium: Watercolor, pen and black ink, graphite

http://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/363689

Illustrations from Compendium Maleficarum (Francesco Maria Guazzo, 1608)