Free* House!!!!!

me sitting on the floor of the bathroom with the lights off and the door closed eating bowls of pills like cereal with kamala harris: so tell me more about venn diagrams

kamala: *manic laughter*

nothing quite like comin home to munch some box after a long day at work

can’t wait for the hand o god to strip me naked and smother me in savory bbq sauce. mmmmmmmm boy i do love getting sauced.

its not "smoke from a wildfire". thats god tryna cook you like a rack o ribs.

obama on linked in be like “hello….. i am .. former president. barack. … obama. … and i am. …. hashtag. open to work.”

reaisting the urge to vague-post about personal grievances rn

i suspect that it might mean that when ur high you wanna get fucked in the ass but idk

What does it mean when I get high and think about getting fucked in the ass

if you were a real pick-me girl you wouldn’t vote

can’t wait to stare longingly and lustfully into the eyes of my royal advisor in court tn

this person gets it

this oppressive southern weather is terrible for boys like me who only want one thing: to dress like a dripped out politburo member in the middle of a strong soviet winter

Your blog really runs on the logic of unfunny + head/getting head/life changing head = funny. (I think you should check your maths)

when she sends you hate mail <<333