justlovingirls

Latest Posts by justlovingirls

Courtney Eaton

as Lottie Matthews in Yellowjackets

so i'm watching hacks

shauna might be mean but there’s only one real hater in the wilderness can i get an amen

jackieshauna are so romantic to me even in their worst moments in their every fight or every hallucination like you can tell they are each other's fucking everythingg and they are just soooo soooo doomed for that it became poetic as fuck to me

Poker Face 2.01 "The Game Is a Foot"

— DERRY GIRLS 2.03 — FLEABAG 2.03

Lottie matthews died doing what she loved: attempting to babytrap shauna shipman

true joy from Shauna Shipman this season:

1: axe murder (by Lottie)

2: don't forget the hunt guyssss (also Lottie)

postpartum psychosis running rampant in my girl 😭

Travis Martinez: Masculinity and Control in Yellowjackets

sorry for the pretentious title. i need to talk about travis for a second. i have a consistent mythos in my head about who he is as a character that i forget people don't have. yes i am embarrassed. incredibly long meta under the cut.

First and foremost, I think it is so important to remember that this guy is a LOSER. He's never been to a school dance. He got made fun of and given a cruel nickname in the 7th grade that has stuck with him all throughout high school. He hates his dad, or at least has complex feelings about him. He's never had sex. He is so insecure that it is laughable.

We can only assume that Travis's dad shaped some of his perceptions of what it means to be a man. In the pilot, we have Coach Martinez honestly, if not cruelly, tell Jackie her worth is in her influence and that she is not particularly skilled at soccer. Coach Martinez's office has several pictures of his family, yet seems distant from his wife and Travis when they leave for nationals. We can see Travis's complex relationship with masculinity (misogyny with Nat's perceived sexual history, stoicism, and aggression to mask emotional distress), and can only assume that a stoic, critical, and distant father is one of the reasons for this. But we could also discuss 90s masculinity and cultural influence as well.

Travis was not (obviously written to be) athletically skilled as a kid, and is not mentioned to be on a sports team. He had a spinal fusion at 13, presumably due to some chronic health issue like scoliosis. His father invests time into the Yellowjackets team, and we see Ben describe them in flashbacks as monsters, so clearly there is some sort of reverence Coach Martinez has for ruthlessness and success. In the original script of episode 4 (I think), we see Travis described as a "sensitive kid trying hard not to be" (or something along those lines), and I can certainly see resentment building between Travis and the Yellowjackets as they represent everything his dad wanted him to be-- athletically skilled, successful, and cut throat. He is resistant to receiving help, outright lashes out in order to maintain this fragile identity as masculine and independent.

He has an interesting sibling relationship with Javi where he is simultaneously trying to force his own thoughts of their father onto him ("Dad was a dick") and protect him from the reality/brutality of their situation (does not tell Javi he dug up the body for the ring). Coach Martinez gives Javi gum for the flight, a gesture of care, and seemingly does not extend the same to Travis. We see Javi as innocent, naive, and artistic. He is presumably unaware of the marital problems in their family, while Travis is. Where Travis resents the Yellowjackets for the attention they receive from his father, he resents Javi because he is supported emotionally and allowed to be soft.

He values honesty, and the audience can see this in seasons one and two– Nat obscuring her relationship with Bobby Farleigh is the initial reason why they break up in 1x7, Nat planting Javi’s shorts is similarly a big point of contention. He is quick to project his own insecurities onto other people, namely Nat-- any skill or sexual experience she has is an attack on his worth as a man. He consistently sabotages his relationship with her by lashing out, not because Nat is doing anything wrong, but because he is afraid of being perceived as not good enough.

Travis’s arc throughout the show is interesting, especially because the audience sees Travis in season one obsessed with control of his own image, honesty, and power. By season two, he is willing to give in to spirituality-- in winter, he opens up to Lottie's "Wiccan bullshit", seeing ritual and belief as rejecting his own ego in a productive way. I have seen a good amount of people talk about how Travis's passivity in the second and third season is his way of protecting himself from the rest of the team, especially following his assault and almost murder in 1x9, but I think there is a little more nuance than just this. There is still an element of Travis seeking control within the routine of Lottie's spirituality. He cannot find Javi following the events of doomcoming, cannot find food in the winter months, cannot protect Shauna from the risk of childbirth, so he submits himself to drinking the tea Lottie prepares, praying, and ritual self harm.

Following Javi's death, we see Travis completely submit. He consumes his brother’s body not only to survive, but also to spiritually keep Javi with him. He eats Javi’s heart as a display of devotion, reverence, and attachment. His acceptance of Nat’s leadership comes from similar motivations, and this marks his almost complete relinquishment of autonomy within the group.

By season three, he is no longer hunting. He is completely detached from the team, past Lottie, Akilah, and the wilderness itself. He spends his time tripping on shrooms to “listen” when Lottie no longer can. It makes a lot of sense why fan opinion has gotten more positive– Travis this season is so passive that he becomes pathetic, both to the audience and the characters. Van, Tai, and Lottie each try to protect him, Akilah provides him with comfort. The rest of the group does not punish Travis for his lack of contribution as they did Jackie– they largely ignore him. And once his two main acts of autonomy (escaping with Kodiak, killing Lottie) fail, there is nothing left. He does not participate in the final hunt of Mari, and the group allows him to get drunk or high with no consequence. It is only when Travis is in Shauna's way that she cares about his lack of participation. The writers have officially connected the proud, aggressive season one Travis to what we know of him in the adult timeline– an isolated addict. He dies doing exactly what he did in the woods: trying to submit himself to meaning, to something bigger than himself, and dying for it.

haven't done my work but i did draw myself not doing my work. and the specter. not sure how this helps

everyone in yellowjackets is fucked up because they had to be cannibals in the woods except for callie who's fucked up because she didn't get to be a cannibal in the woods

Season 1 / Season 2 / Season 3

listening to straight women talk about their boyfriends is insane. it's never a normal story

realization (if jackie and shauna knew girls can date girls)

greatest philosophical questions of the century: are children's cartoons politically significant? do audiobooks count as reading? is booktok destroying women's brains? are a middle class americans the most oppressed group of all time? who's stupider: children or schools? is sexual inexperience the truest sin? are pad users more oppressed than tampon users? should people eat quinoa specifically if we ignore all other foods on earth? is taylor swift underrated or overrated? is it pedophilia to dress stupid? is intra lgbt community slur reclaiming okay? does autism stop you from going to the club? is being a misogynist actually more progressive than not being a misogynist? france? should people who don't like spoilers be killed on the street or should people who say spoilers be killed on the street? is calling something gross fascism except when i do it? is it more progressive to be bilingual? among others

oh, okay, i see. you think this has nothing to do with you.

you go into the yellowjackets tag and filter out... oh i dont know. misty quigley, for instance, because you're trying to tell the world you're against the violent 'evil' she possesses and don't ever defend her actions or weird girl tendencies. but what you don't know is that yellowjackets is a piece of media first and foremost exploring how grief changes the fundamental building blocks of who we are, and how trauma can cause us to act in perverse and off putting ways.

youre also blithely unaware of the fact that the same character traits and flaws you scorn in misty, are ever present in your other 'favs', that filtered down throughout the yellowjackets team via jackies death and the cannibalism, and then trickled down into some other tragic yj girl where you, no doubt, fished out of some clearance bin and defend her through long think pieces on tumblr.com without inherently realising they are just as bad as each other, misty quigley is just othered for it for the simple act of existing as a girl whos kinda weird and who never grew out of being 17.

however, misty quigley represents the fundamental truth that the other yellowjacket women can't stand her or stomach her bc they see too much of themselves in her actions and devotion and grief. and its sort of comical how you think youve made a choice by hating her character, in a way that 'exempts' you from being immoral, when in fact, you're loving the same characters that are reflected in misty's character....from a pile of 'stuff'

funniest thing in yellowjackets to me is that other tai just wants van carnally. like yeah the fucking wilderness demon living in your ex girlfriend is back. she woke up went “wrong wife” and decided to kill the dog. anyway she wants to kiss you. sorry and congratulations

kink isnt sexual and dude isnt gendered and aces can desire sex and cishet men are queer and lesbians can sleep with men and twinks can be fat and communists can own for-profit businesses and punks don’t have to listen to punk music and vegans can eat meat and white people are poc and humans can breathe underwater

Every time a gay man says something misogynistic I read a chapter of killing stalking

do you have any idea how fucking mad i would be if i was jackie taylor and i died before shauna shipmans mascification? can you even begin to imagine the white hot rage i would feel at seeing this from the afterlife?

JACKIE IS ROLLINGGG IN HERRR GRAVEEEE

worst thing that can happen to a girl is her friend gets a boyfriend

let the hard animal of your body hate what it hates

having a hard time imagining sisyphus happy to be honest. i find it more plausible to imagine sisyphus killing himself

shine normal like a plain rock

The vigilante dating world is, perhaps, a bit too small

3x02 / 1x03

"But, that Vanessa Palmer charm magnet is just too powerful" bro :( van brought so much joy to the people around her. she was the life of the party.

"how can you look at me and pretend I'm someone you've never met"